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La Liga Loca

A sideways look at Spanish football


Tim Stannard and Simon Talbot

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Ronaldinho's doubts and death threats


Wednesday 19 March 2008 10:50

Most Primera club presidents carry chips on their shoulders the size of Strasbourg.
 
They are some of the paranoid men on the planet, primed to come over all Kenneth Williams and declare, "infamy, infamy, they've all got in for me", at any perceived slight from those nominally in charge of the game in Spain.
 
And considering those pulling the footballing strings in La Liga are often men of a certain age with generations old axes to grind or bury in each other's spines, some of them may have a point.
 
On Monday, Zaragoza boss - and the meanest looking mutha in the game - Eduardo Bandrés, decided to discount his alarming turnover in coaches as the cause for his club's troubles this season and blame referees.
 
"You can't cry to mummy about it," he whined, "sometimes the only way of being heard is to give a thump on the table", or complain endlessly in the press, perhaps.
 
But this whinge was topped - and then some - by the rant from Betis puppet president, José Léon, who donned a silver foil beanie hat and went before the media, on Tuesday, to declare that the LFP boss, Angel Villar "wants to send us to the second division".
 
The reason for this pique of paranoia is the decision taken by the league competition committee on what to do with the suspended Betis v Athletic Bilbao game from Saturday night.
 
The organisation have decided to award the 2-1 win to Athletic, taking into consideration that there was only 19 minutes of the game left to play and the visitors were down to ten men with no substitutes left.
 
Betis have been ordered to close the de Lopera stadium for two matches - a punishment that would have been four had it not been for the actions of home fans in apprehending the culprit.
 
Marca agree with the decision admitting it is a harsh punishment on the remaining 40,000 fans but argue that a club is responsible for what happens in their ground.
 
Betis, meanwhile, continue to feel that having Javier Tebas, "an intimate enemy of Villar", says Marca, as their representative in the league is the reason for the strong action.
 
Athletic Bilbao, aside from having their first two keepers out of action, are pleased as punch with the arbitration which moves them into 10th at the expense of Valencia.
 
"Justice has been done", confirmed Fernando García Macua, president of the Basque club.
 
There is still trouble at t'mill in the Kingdom of Catalunya concerning the declaration by Barça's medical staff that there is nothing wrong with Ronaldinho.
 
El Pais report that the striker has declared that he wants to play Thursday's cup tie against Valencia, "with or without problems". Only 40% of Sport readers agree, in their latest on-line poll.
 
Sunday's edition of El Periódico wrote that Ronaldinho was out disco-dancing, last Wednesday night, and was in no fit state to train the following day, hence Frank Rijkaard's cover story that the fallen star was injured.
 
Mundo Deportivo have gone a step further and risked annihilation by Joan Laporta's android army by declaring that this is just one of many occasions when the players aren't injured, but fancy a break and get a sickie - a policy that the coach is complicit in, apparently.
 
"The most guilty in these episodes that are so common in the dressing room is Rijkaard", j'accuse's the Barcelona sports daily.
 
Marca are continuing to hound Diego until either he or one of his family admit that he is desperate for a move to Madrid in the summer. Having failed with his father, a lacky has been sent to Bremen to track down the striker, but all the Brazilian would say is that "what's been published is a lie. I've not signed for another club".
 
If Real Madrid are to lure Diego to the Spanish capital they are going to have call in Predrag Mijatovic's black ops wet work team to do so, it would appear.
 
"If someone wants to buy Diego, they have to kill me first", warned Werder Bremen president, Jurgen Born.

On to actual football and Racing Santander are attempting to overturn Getafe's 3-1 lead in Sardinero in the Copa del Rey semi-final. But cool-as-cucumber blues boss Michael Laudrup is unconcerned that the Cantabrian stadium will be turned into a footballing hell by the home support.
 
"Hell is to go to Greece or Turkey and playing in front of 80,000 fans in the stands and with 20,000 singing all night by your hotel", said the great Dane.



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About Tim Stannard and Simon Talbot

When he isn't fighting the evil forces of flamenco or attracting libel actions for La Liga Loca, Tim Stannard is building his media empire in Madrid. As well as contributing to Football365 and doing odd jobs elsewhere, Tim also works in the glamorous world of television as a producer, script writer, news editor, coffee boy and stand-in fluffer.

Simon Talbot? Well, he's a man of mystery.

Comments

  March 19, 2008 19:30

eddy said:

Okay, why do Real Madrid always go after damaged goods?  Now it's Diego?  After he's had a well-publicized dressing-room bust-up with another player in Bremen?  And following his spitting at the referee in a previous game that got him suspended?  Don't Madrid have enough of a hot-head to contend with in Sergio Ramos?  Not only that but they also bought the fragile Arjen Robben, the pin-headed, red-and-yellow-card-collecting, own-goal-scoring Pepe, and the tiny, past his sell-by date Cannavaro, who, when playing alongside Pepe, makes their comic defense resemble Mutt and Jeff?  Not to mention the non-goal-scoring duo of Soldado and Saviola and the little midfield girl with the long, dark hair and long legs who continually sprays the ball around the pitch when she's playing, but without necessarily hitting anyone?  Who the hell is in charge of scouting at Madrid anyway?  I could do a better job and without spending all that money.

  March 21, 2008 00:18

Shmulik said:

Eddy, it seems to me you're not letting facts get in the way of theory...

Pepe is surely over-paid for but most surely not a bad player, I remember more than a single player who conceded an own goal and I don't think all of them were good-for-nothings...

Diego's a fantastic player and would give Real the extra notch they need in midfield instead of the one footed-half-brained Guti...

Robben does have glass lags but to doubt Canavaro's abilities seem to me a bit odd to say the very least...

He has been magnificant for Real for about a year now, withstanding confrontations with the Uche brothers...

Together with the aforementioned Pepe he completely destroyed Barca's attack in the most important game of the season so far, and I could give many more examples of, not to mention the role of the psycho-yet-still-super-player Ramos...

Soldado and Saviola aren't exactly shining, but I'd take them anytime if the alternative was something as horrible as Gudhunssen or whatever the right way to spell his name is...

And Gago might be as girly-looking almost as Guti, but he is actually a bright prospect for the future and not so bad at the moment either, especially when he'll finally learn how to aim for goal... I wouldn't worry too much about his passing - that is more of a concern when talking about Mahmdu "why-pass-when-you-can-kick-someone-instead" Diara...

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