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La Liga Loca

A sideways look at Spanish football


Tim Stannard

See all posts

La Liga’s Good Day, Bad Day - Round 5


Monday 28 September 2009 12:00

GOOD DAY

Xerez

As you read this, just imagine a march mixing the missile-displaying pomp of a Soviet-style May Day parade with a full-on nudey lady Brazilian carnival.

That’s the kind of greeting that surely awaits the Xerez players this week after they picked up their first point in a draw in Cornella against Espanyol. Still no goal, mind.

At the head of the parade and being fed grapes and booze by all the local lovelies will be former Valencia goalkeeper Renan, who had an inspired afternoon keeping all of Espanyol’s efforts well and truly out.

Sevilla

Wow. Sevilla have definitely grown a big old pair over the summer, with three wins in eight days against Osasuna, Mallorca and Athletic Bilbao to keep them at the top of the Primera B table.

But it is Saturday’s goalkeeper-assisted 4-0 victory up in the Basque country that’s the most impressive of this terrific trio of wins.

However, a section of Sevilla fans will still be grumbling about Manolo Jiménez being on the bench no matter what he does.

But surely he has achieved more than enough by now for both people and press to leave him alone for the rest of the season?

Especially, if he does the nicest of numbers on Real Madrid in the Sanchez Pizjuán next Sunday.

Mallorca

If La Liga Loca gave out Manager of the Month awards, then it would hand September’s gong to Gregorio Manzano.

Although the blog still calls upon the fine folk at FourFourTwo HQ to send two thousand quid to Madrid so it can be forwarded immediately to Mallorca’s manager.

Manzano’s men have been brutally effective in picking up maximum points in all their ‘winnable’ games - home ties against Xerez, Tenerife and most recently of all Valladolid - as well as picking up a point away at Villarreal to leave them in fourth with 10.

But the real disappointment is that the home fans are totally indifferent to the cause of the cash strapped club with just 10,000 turning up to see the club’s opener against Xerez and Monday’s papers not even bothering to report the previous day’s paltry turnout.

Juca

Another cap must be doffed to Miguel Angel Lotina who keeps Deportivo grinding through the start of the season by dumping a whole heap of misery on Villarreal on Sunday night with a 1-0 victory.

The win came from a second free-kick strike in a week for Brazilian nut-bag lookalike Juca, who has the gait of a psycho Serbian than a Samba man.

Maxi

A player that La Liga Loca has felt has been well off the pace in the Primera for some time now came off the bench to grab an equaliser for Atlético in Mestalla on Saturday night.

In a cracking game where defences were equally poor and just about every offside decision was wrong, the Argentinean grabbed his first league goal since last December to save manager Abel Resino’s skin.

For the time being, at least.

David Villa

Although it is an enormously inconvenient fact for the Madrid and Barcelona papers, it is David Villa who is currently top of the Pichichi table in la Liga with six strikes. And not Zlatan nor Ronaldo.

Real Madrid, Barcelona

Two games. Two wins. But you can read more about one of them by following this Twitter feed.

Gerard Piqué

The Barcelona defender possesses what La Liga Loca feels is the most important component of any professional football - the willingness to confess their hatred of all rivals. As well as good hair.

Piqué’s profile ticks both boxes with his past taunting of both Madrid and Espanyol and fine Tarantino-style quiff for much of last season.

And he’s a decent defender too, with an eye for goal. His second league strike of the season was a free-kick toe poke against Málaga.

BAD DAY

Villarreal

Now this is getting beyond a joke.

A defeat to Deportivo means that Villarreal are only one point better than Xerez. And one point worse than Atlético Madrid.

La Liga Loca is not sure which is more embarrassing for the Yellow Submarine.

But despite this being Villarreal’s worst ever top-flight start, the blog feels confident that Ernesto Valverde will sort his side out, sooner rather than later.

Unai Emery

Despite just one defeat this season, and being in the process of bedding in a brand new defence, Unai Emery is already under pressure from a Mestalla crowd not well known for its patience. Or, indeed, sanity.

Once Maxi’s late equaliser for Atlético slipped past Carlos Moya, the look of “oh bugger” on Emery’s face was a clear as a biscuit as he contemplated the wobbly week facing him before next Sunday’s trip to face Racing Santander.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic

After boisterous Málaga defender Weligton tried some of the rough stuff on Zlatan Ibrahimovic on Saturday night, there was a moment when the barking mad Barça forward stared at the Brazilian, smiling serenely.

“Kick his head off, six match ban. Kick his head off, six match ban” went the Swede’s thought process.

Sadly, the Barça striker took the pacifist path.

Nivaldo

The Valladolid central defender spent the match against Mallorca doing exactly what La Liga Loca would do if it were told to form part of the Pucela back four - wander about, look lost, stare into the stands and form part of the club’s notoriously awful offside trap.

Atlético Madrid

Two more goals conceded against Valencia makes Atleti in possession of the worst defence in la Liga with 13 strikes against them. Good going.

Getafe

Michel out! Michel out! Michel out!

Espanyol

Now La Liga Loca doesn’t like to make merry at other people’s expense, but let’s look back at this gem from Thursday from Paul from Barcelona after Espanyol’s 2-1 win over Málaga.

“Xerez at home on Sunday and in previous years I'd have said welcome to your first goal/point(s) Xerez. But this new-look team has something about them.”

Here’s this week’s comedy outpourings from Paul the Perico.

“Xerez - 200 away fans. Well done them. I spent 90 minutes watching this. You, Dear Readers, shouldn't waste even 90 seconds reading about it.

"Both teams rubbish from start to finish. Xerez will get some serious hidings this year as will Espanyol after that.”

Paul, Barcelona

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About Tim Stannard

La Liga Loca is the playground for the evil, more childish half of Tim Stannard’s psyche to be let loose. The other 50% is a contributor to FourFourTwo magazine, Football365, Sabotage Times as well as other publications such as UEFA Champions Magazine and When Saturday Comes. He is also a regular guest on Real Madrid TV’s Extra Time show and works as a TV producer extraordinaire for hire. To contact Tim directly email laligaloca@yahoo.co.uk

Comments

  September 28, 2009 14:29

AdamCule said:

Paul can find consolation in the fact that his side's c**k up meant that my 4 game accumulator was well and truly ruined - though I had covered myself by backing the draw at Cornellà as well.

What is LLL going to do with all of its "La Liga B" comments if Sevilla beat real madrid at the Sanchez Pizjuan next week and leapfrog the indebted hollywood types from the capital?

  September 28, 2009 14:41

Kirkabir said:

5 Goals in 5 games for Zlat and you put him in the bad day part ? Thats it ! Deleting FFT LLL bookmark !

Wellington should have his head examed by the way...

  September 28, 2009 16:32

Fletcher_Defender said:

the villareal bashing made me laugh

  September 28, 2009 17:37

Paul said:

Adam- Every cloud..and all that.

  September 28, 2009 18:55

Vergilius said:

Love this blog: its fun and best of all, it doesn't share in the negative tone that so much football coverage seems to have taken on.

  September 28, 2009 19:57

aaronwk said:

kirkabir--  he had a bad day!  if that was your day at the office, getting brutally hacked over and over, that would indeed be a BAD DAY.

  September 28, 2009 21:41

Spanish Villan said:

God bless Villareal and Athletico for keeping the amusement factor going...

  September 28, 2009 22:17

Guerrero said:

Regarding Málaga vs Barça, I have only this to say: Weligton, you A$$! He steps on Messi's ankle after the ball goes out. Ref: Sorry didn't see it. He pulls Messi down in the box. Ref: What, did something happen? On a corner, he takes a swing at--and hits--Piqúe's head. Ref: sorry was looking at the linesman (he's cute). I wish Zlatan had taken out the little Brazilian. That match got so nasty, near the end when the home side kicked the ball out for someone going to ground, the Blaugrana pointedly did not give it back. Final laugh was Barça's. Just was well. Joy, yet another "Osasuna" on the rise.

  September 29, 2009 06:28

RayDeChaussee said:

Juca's a thoroughly nice lad by all accounts, those accounts coming from my mother-in-law who lives a couple of doors down from the Brazilian free-kick artiste.

If only Depor could find a decent striker to go with him.

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