La Liga Loca

Who will be the losers in La Liga’s relegation race?

2013-05-22T11:26:00Z

There’s a certain horror film beastie quality about this season’s Primera relegation candidates. They're all proving very difficult to finish off and banish to the dark side (Spain’s second division, in this instance). Mallorca’s Monday night victory over a disinterested Betis kept the survival hopes of the Balearic brigade flickering for another week, in a tense battle that still includes six clubs. With two matches to go, here are the runners and riders who may well be heading down to La Segunda...

20th - Celta Vigo (31 points)
The Galician club are the side who are going to need snookers to stay up, the team who need to pick up maximum points in their two last games combined with a flukey combination of results from their rivals. On a positive note, Celta’s final two games are quite winnable, coming against clubs with absolutely nothing to play for. First up, it’s an away day to Valladolid, then the visit of a flimsy Espanyol on the final weekend.
Survival Chances - Slim to very slim

19th - Mallorca (32 points)
Another team who are a bit Bon Jovi (i.e. Living on a Prayer), but like Celta Vigo, Mallorca have a decent chance of picking up six points if they get their act together. The first match is an outing to Vicente Calderón against an Atlético Madrid side who have spent much of the past week galavanting on a promotional jolly in Singapore. The final match sees the visit of Valladolid, the aforementioned side with absolutely nothing to play for. The key factor to remember here is that despite the potentially somnambulant nature of the opposition, Mallorca aren’t very good.
Survival Chances - Stranger things have happened. Arizmendi still has a career, for starters...

18th - Zaragoza (34 points)
A club who know that two victories and 40 points will probably be enough, with the sides immediately above them unlikely to pick up maximum points. Zaragoza have been in this rather uncomfortable position in previous seasons and prevailed, although there is the feeling that Sunday’s home defeat to Athletic Bilbao was a bit of a battering to the club’s spirit. Zaragoza’s final two matches are not the easiest, with an away trip to Betis - fighting to hang on to a European spot - and a home clash against Atlético Madrid. And who knows what mood Diego Simeone's boys will be in, by then...
Survival Chances - 50/50

17th - Deportivo (35 points)
Oh dear. Things are looking a little dark for Deportivo. The team may well have more points in the bag than Zaragoza, but it’s hard to see the Galicians picking up more than one in the final sprint. This weekend sees the team heading to Málaga, who are hanging on to a European spot in case their appeal against next season’s UEFA ban is successful. The motivation for the southern side to win in front of their own fans is an extra reason not to be especially cheerful. Ideally, the northerners would like someone snugly like Getafe for their final match. Instead, Indebted Depor are hosting a Real Sociedad side playing for nothing less than Champions League qualification.
Survival Chances - Not looking good

16th - Osasuna (36 points)
La Liga Loca suspects 39 points will be enough to stay up this season. And by Merciful Zeus, Osasuna have a chance to drag themselves up to that barrier with a home fixture against a woeful Sevilla side who have won just one league game from 18. Not even goal-shy Osasuna can blow that opportunity. The final match of the campaign is a visit to the Santiago Bernabeu. Real Madrid might be a bit of a Mourinho-obsessed mess by that point, but there’s no guarantee of getting anything in the Spanish capital.
Survival Chances - Entirely Osasuna’s own fault if they fail

15th - Granada (39 points)
The Andalusians are in the ‘virtually safe’ department on 39 points, but needing two more to be properly safe. The most points that third-from-bottom Zaragoza can accrue is 40, however a superior head-to-head record against Granada sees the team lead by Lucas Alcaraz needing an extra cushion. The good news is that Granada are in very good form and are playing Getafe on the final match of the round, although the preceding trip to Mestalla looks a lot harder.
Survival Chances - Veeeeeery strong

The Final Prediction - It’s goodbye to Celta Vigo, Mallorca and Deportivo

Florentino hopes José leaves Madrid without a fuss after unsurprising announcement

2013-05-21T08:46:00Z

When an email from Real Madrid popped into La Liga Loca’s overflowing inbox announcing a Florentino Pérez press conference for later that evening, even the slow-witted blog was able to work out what was going on.

But the initial suspicion that the Dear Leader was looking for more Words with Friends partners proved incorrect. As did the second suggestion - that all club employees would have to wear yellow for every minute of every day next season. It couldn’t be the blatantly obvious could it?

As it turned out, it was. Pérez was merely announcing the humdrum and somewhat predictable news that José Mourinho and Real Madrid would be parting ways at the end of the season. He also confirmed that the club's presidential elections would be held on June 16, should anyone else be rich enoug to stand against the current Real Madrid head honcho.

The key message from Pérez was that it definitely wasn’t a sacking, but a respectful farewell “by mutual consent”, therefore not requiring any compensation. The reason cited for Mourinho’s departure three years into his six-year deal was simply the difficulty of the job in hand. “He feels there is a level of pressure that’s difficult to support and up to now he was able to do it,” explained the Madrid bigwig. What was missing from Pérez was a Loony Tunes mime and the mouthing of words “he’s lost it” while at the podium.

The President admitted that an approach had been made to PSG for Carlo Ancelotti, but that it had been rebuffed, with no news as to what the next steps would be in finding a replacement for Mourinho.

Due the very unsurprising nature of the surprise announcement, the local media were already waiting to begin their goodbyes to the Special One, which mainly consisted of recalling when the manager was rude about Barcelona, Pep Guardiola, UEFA, referees, Manuel Preciado, Manuel Pellegrini, the club's youth team players, the club's youth team coach, Pepe, Iker Casillas, and so on and so on. ‘The Special End’ was Marca’s headline on Tuesday. AS had begun their particular tribute the day before with a very entertaining feature detailing of all the scrapes Mourinho had found himself in over the past three years.

Tuesday’s edition was just as fierce, but in a surprising move it was quite critical of El Presidente himself, which is never normally a good idea. “Florentino is good at looking for money and political influence but is a compulsive spender and frankly quite bad at sporting management,” wrote the paper’s brave editor, Alfredo Relaño.

Flags were at half mast in the Catalan capital, with their arch enemy only around for another fortnight. However, there are few punches pulled in the editorials reacting to the news of more managerial movements in Mordor. “Defeated and divorced,” wrote Josep Maria Casanovas in Sport, “They were destined to end this way.”

“If Madrid were a multinational company that demanded results from their executives, they would immediately fire Florentino Pérez as the person most responsible for the disaster of the past three years,” continues the columnist, getting into his groove. “The Flo/Mou partnership brought the club to one of its lowest points in terms of image, the sporting results have been disappointing and the economic debt has continued to grow.”

The feeling that Florentino has failed is just as strong over in the pages of Mundo Deportivo. The paper’s Director, Santi Nolla, writes that “Mou’s goodbye is the end of an era in Madrid, not a footballing era as nothing that noteworthy has been achieved, but in terms of tension, the press conferences, the attacks and the bad image,”

Real Madrid must now hope that Mourinho’s goodbye is a swift, no fuss and no nonsense affair, ideally with the Madrid manager seen but never heard over the final two weeks. While the end of an era is being spoken about in Spain, it is important to remember that until Mourinho boards the plane to London, anything can still happen at Real Madrid.

Relentless Valencia still hunting Real Sociedad in chase for Champions League spot

2013-05-20T10:10:00Z

Good Day

Barcelona
The champions are still on course for a 100 point campaign, after a fairly humdrum 2-1 win over Valladolid in the pouring rain at the Camp Nou. The club also got to lift the league trophy, an honour given to Tito Vilanova and Eric Abidal in the loveliest of touches.

Imanol Agirretxe
A whopping win for Real Sociedad, who beat Sevilla 2-1 in the Sánchez Pizjuán to hold firm in fourth, equal on points with Valencia. The scorer of the decisive goal was Imanol Agirretxe, a forward who has popped up with six timely goals in the last six matches.

Valencia
There’s a certain Terminator 2, T-1000, relentlessness about Valencia’s pursuit of Real Sociedad in the battle for fourth. Their straightforward 1-0 win over Getafe in the Coliseum was their third victory in a row. “We have to win all of our matches and we are doing it,” barked Valencia coach, Ernesto Valverde, before asking each of the journalists in the room if they were John Connor.

Piti
If Málaga’s appeal against next season’s ban from European competitions next season fails, then eighth place in La Liga will be enough to qualify for the Europa League. Rayo currently occupy the spot, although they have yet to get their UEFA license to participate due to outstanding debts to other clubs. Rayo moved up the table after an impressive 3-2 win at Levante and two more goals from the imperious Piti.
“He’s a spectacular footballer who plays and creates,” purred Rayo boss Paco Jémez. “What’s more he’s got 17 goals, everything he does is dangerous and he’s scored more than Higuaín and Benzema.”

Granada
A huge spurt, as it were, from Granada sees 11 points chalked up from the last five matches, after a run of eight matches without a victory. Granada are ‘virtually safe’ on 39 points, although manager Lucas Alcaraz warns that “it’s not over, when it seems like there’s not much left, it can still be a lot.”
The question for Granada must be why they can’t play so well a little bit earlier in the season, and save themselves from all this kerfuffle come April and May.

Deportivo
Depor achieved a whopper of a win over Espanyol, who now look like being in a straight fight with Zaragoza, one point and one place beneath, to avoid going down. The tough ask for Depor is that the club’s final two games are a trip to Málaga and a home clash against Real Sociedad.

Elche
A quick pat on the back for Elche, who confirmed their position in La Primera next season after 24 years away.

Bad Day

Sevilla
Unai Emery blamed Saturday’s season-killing home defeat to Real Sociedad on three things: La Real being very good, Sevilla being very bad, and the referee. “We have to be self critical to get better, but not look for the guilty,” mused Emery on Sevilla’s path for the future.

Luis García
“It’s a club whose natural position is between eighth and twelfth and that’s where we are now.” Those were comments Getafe boss Luis García shared with the blog almost a year ago. Getafe’s home defeat to Valencia sees the club slap-bang in the middle of that range in tenth with two games to go. The challenge for García once again has been trying to get his footballers to make that extra step required to get into Europe. However, breaking the natural way of life for Getafe has been a difficult business.

Ander Herrera
The Athletic midfielder should have been a chirpy fella having fretted all season about the chances of his club slipping into La Segunda. Athletic’s late win over Zaragoza put the Basque side onto a very handy 44 points, unfortunately it left Sunday’s rivals in deep trouble. “It was the saddest victory of my life,” was the lament from Herrera after the win over his former club. “The situation at Zaragoza is painful for me as I am Zaragocista.

Osasuna
LLL has a feeling the three points Osasuna need to make life a little more comfortable will arrive next week against the hopeless Sevilla. However, it’s going to be a horrible week of waiting, predicted José Luis Mendilibar after the 3-0 loss to Granada. “At the moment, I’m worried about lifting the spirits of the lads,” fretted the Osasuna boss.

Nelson Oliveira
The Portuguese forward scored Deportivo’s second in the 2-0 victory over Espanyol, but decided to get some payback on fans who have been critical of the footballer after a disappointing season. The on-loan Benfica man attempted the always controversial finger-on-lips-to-crowd gesture before being dragged away by teammates.

Zaragoza
That’s got to hurt. 1-0 up against Athletic Bilbao, and then two goals lost in the final ten minutes to see Zaragoza in the relegation zone with two matches left. “The tension and pressure weighed heavy on us this time,” noted manager, Manolo Jiménez.

Celta fans hope seafood survival plan can help their team avoid the drop

2013-05-17T09:48:00Z

Read on to find out how a bit of mussel (ahem) may help Celta Vigo...

Saturday

Getafe (9th) v Valencia (5th) - 18.00 (local time)
Those sneaky little monsters. A week or two back, La Liga Loca predicted Valencia would squeeze into fourth spot even though Real Sociedad were going great guns at the time, with a five point lead over the Mestalla men. The blog was hoping it would be wrong. Unfortunately, La Real taking just one point from a possible six has seen Valencia move level on points, but with an inferior head-to-head record. Sociedad's most recent setback came close to midnight on Monday, when Granada snuck in with a late equaliser against the Basque side in a 2-2 draw.
That kicked off much a hullabaloo in the household of excitable Valencia striker, Jonas Gonçalaves. The forward admitted that he “celebrated the Granada goal as well. I was watching it at home with some people, and really went through the mill. Bit by bit the chances of playing in the Champions League are going up,” chirped the cheery Brazilian.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Granada (16th) v Osasuna (15th) - 20.00
If one or both of these two sides opt for living a little dangerously and going for a win to put them on a very handy 39 points mark, this could be a tasty tie. If the two clubs opt to play safe then it could be a dismal goalless draw. LLL is going to try to be a positive about the inevitable 0-0 on Saturday evening, after a promise from Osasuna striker Kike Sola. “If we start at a great pace from the first minute, it’s going to be harder for Granada,” noted the Pamplona poacher.
LLL Prediction - Draw (of the goalless variety)

Sevilla (8th) v Real Sociedad (4th) - 22.00
With La Real apparently running out of steam, with just five points picked up from the last 12 available, the mental focus from the club has had to change from ‘we deserve to be this high up the table with three games to go’, to ‘we’re lucky to be this high, so let’s not panic and turn into big blouses and blow it’.
“We would have signed up to be in this spot with our eyes closed,” announced Xabi Prieto on the deal he would have taken at the beginning of the season.
Meanwhile back at the ranch in the city of Seville, Unai Emery is still dreaming of a European qualification spot. The Sevilla boss will also need to focus on keeping hold of Jesús Navas, who is reportedly being hunted by Manchester City. The rumours strengthened when the previously home-sick footballer told TV station, La Sexta, on Thursday that “I’m ready for everything. You want to keep on developing and chasing titles because you get used to such great things, but I am happy here,” was the assurance from the wantaway winger.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sunday

Levante (13th) v Rayo Vallecano (10th) - 12.00
This is the most meaningless match of the round due its mid-table nature, but who cares! Levante is all about match-fixing stories these days. After an aborted attempt last week, Sergio Ballesteros spoke to the media about the past few weeks which has been very ‘he-said, she-said’ over the Levante 0-4 Deportivo result from April 13th.
“The captain of Levante is not for sale,” roared the burly defender. He was underlining the fact he would never take money to lose a game, rather than discussing his transfer value. Which would be small. Ballesteros also spoke about the dressing room bust-up during half-time of the Deportivo game, when team-mate José Barkero reportedly questioned Ballesteros' commitment to the cause.
“He told me after that he didn’t know why he did it,” revealed the stopper, who is studying the idea of legal action against Barkero for besmirching his good name. Either way, Ballesteros has not been having the happiest of times of late. “Two bad weeks, I’ve not slept much. I’m very sad,” lamented the Levante captain.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Deportivo (18th) v Espanyol (11th) - 17.00
Having already played this weekend’s fixture, the week before last, Celta Vigo will be sitting out the round hoping clubs like Espanyol can do them a bit of a favour by beating their relegation rivals. To help lubricate this process, a Celta supporters club will be offering an incentive to the footballers of Espanyol (and Athletic Bilbao, who face Zaragoza). That incentive is a kilo of mussels for a victory.
“They have to win the games, no other result will do,” warned Belermo Dios, the fanclub president. “We can’t give them bonuses, what’s more there’s a crisis and no money. We want to give typical products of the region,” said Dios, on Celta’s salty seafood plan for survival.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Zaragoza (17th) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) - 19.00
Hooray! The old San Mamés may be deconstructed after this season, but the famous arch spanning one of the stands will be saved. The construction company performing the work have set aside enough budget to safely dismantle it, with the arch to be plonked somewhere in the city of Bilbao at a later date.
But onto football topics. Athletic want three points from this match to make things a little easier at the end of the season. Zaragoza would like three points to avoid getting relegated. This has left Athletic midfielder Ander Herrera in a bit of a tug-of-love situation, given the match sees him facing his boyhood heroes and former employers. “Clearly, it’s not just another game for me. If there’s a team I would like to stay up, as well as ours, it’s Zaragoza for all they’ve given me.”
Should Herrera pop up with a winner, will we be seeing the saddest ‘not celebrating, not celebrating’ of them all?
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Valladolid (12th) - 21.00
Kill joys gotta...er...kill joy. The Barcelona players were clearly in good spirits (nudge, nudge) on Monday's title-celebrating bus tour of the city. Good for them, thought the blog. However, local council busy-body Joan Colom, a bigwig in the health department, moaned that the footballers enjoying themselves in a pleasing manner on a summer’s evening gave “a negative image", adding: "It doesn’t help anyone."
"It’s an anecdote and should stay that way - the tour was a success," was the stern response from club spokesman, Toni Freixa.
The other news in Barça, aside from the small matter of Leo Messi probably missing the rest of the season, is the rumour that Víctor Valdés will be sold over the summer, rather than being allowed to run down his contract. Oh, there’s also Pedro admitting that the current campaign wasn’t one of his best. “Some seasons you bring more and some you bring less. This year, I brought a lot less,” admitted the gloomy Canary Islander.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Mallorca (20th) v Betis (7th) - 22.00
Poor Mallorca have to wait until the witching hour on Monday night for their match up against Real Betis. Although there may be a few butterflies in the bellies because of this, the Mallorca players can pass the time by reading a copy of Betis boss Pepe Mel’s second book, The Path to the Great Beyond, set to be launched on May 24. Funnily enough, that’s where Mallorca are heading if this particular match isn’t won.
“The Holy Father, Islamic Terrorists and the Sevilla Derby are the ingredients of this explosive novel,” gushes website, Andalucía Crítica on a book that is sure to be on LLL's summer reading list.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Friday night Copa del Rey final has a friendly feel

2013-05-16T10:08:00Z

The build-up to this season's Copa del Rey final has been curiously low key. This potentially stems from the lack of care and attention given to the competition by the Spanish FA (RFEF), who had to switch the encounter to a Friday night after a scheduling clash with the Eurovision Song Contest. No, seriously.

Looking on the bright side though, it's still an improvement on last season, when the showdown between Barcelona and Athletic Bilbao took place just one day before Spain’s first pre-Euros warm-up match, on a pitch just four days old due to a Coldplay concert earlier the same week.

La Liga Loca suspects the relegation of the Copa del Rey to lowly ‘Spanish Super Cup’ status is down to the simple truth that everyone knows that Real Madrid are going to win. Nearly 14 years of Atlético Madrid failure and 25 games without a Rojiblanco victory suggest that midfielder Tiago Mendes wasn’t joking when he gave his team a five percent chance of winning at the Santiago Bernabéu on Friday night.

At least defender Diego Godín was a little more optimistic with his forecast. “The final is 50-50," he said, dutifully. "Of course, Real Madrid will start favourites, but before the game starts the chances are equal for everyone.” Yet, Arda Turan, whose hair is a marvel to behold at the moment, is so confident of a Real Madrid victory that he said he would cut his beautiful locks off should there be a surprise on the night.

This deep-seated lack of faith in Atlético’s ability to even turn up sees a distracted Madrid press looking back at previous finals between the two clubs and speaking to veterans. The last final involving the two teams was back in 1992, when Carter USM ruled supreme. It also took place at Real Madrid’s home, but saw a 2-0 victory for Atlético, with goals from Bernd Schuster and Paulo Futre.

Thursday’s edition of AS leads with a hint of a rumour that PSG are cheekily demanding Cristiano Ronaldo in place of coach Carlo Ancelotti. The day before, the paper was all with the bolshiness concerning a bonding team lunch for Real Madrid that took place without the coach. To be fair, that’s not an usual occurrence at a football club, but AS took it as a snub to the manager and plonked “Therapy Without Mou” on the front cover. Sadly, we are left without the image of coach and captain sat next to each other and Mourinho requesting someone “ask Casillas to pass the salt please. And to try not to drop it.”

Marca have lifted their game a little, with the revelation that Falcao and Ronaldo score lots of goals, but went off on a huge tangent on Wednesday by detailing what was admittedly a fun story of a wee kiddie footballer stopping a row between his coach and the referee during a youth team match.

Friday’s cup final is a clash between a Real Madrid side who need to win the cup to save face, and an Atlético Madrid side not expecting to be victorious, and far less fussed anyway now third place has been secured in the league. This has left the showpiece occasion bereft of a little bit of attention, though the local police will not be too bothered about about that.

However, a Bernabéu stadium one third full of Madrid fans, one third full of Atlético Madrid supporters, and one third full of Spanish FA guests rattling their jewelry will still be a spectacle. What is needed is a contest, and that’s what Atlético Madrid have failed to deliver for nearly 15 years now. It’s time that awful record was put to bed.

Barça take to the streets as Real Sociedad start to slide

2013-05-14T09:20:00Z

Has the Spanish League become ridiculously easy to win? It says much that the Catalan press and Barcelona themselves have spent such a chunk of energy to justify why the weekend’s title win is still worthy of celebration.

While it is true that the last two races have been of a fairly one-horse variety due to the other Clásico nag going lame, you can only beat the opponents in front of you and win the titles available, and all that jazz.

LLL is all on board with the notion that this title victory will only be fully appreciated for its genius in future-world (the blog still has high hopes the same will happen for Buffy). It's an opinion obviously shared by the half-million people who lined the streets of the Catalan capital to watch the Barça players on their annual bus-ride evening of waving from under silly hats.

Hats in the air like you just don't care

Mundo Deportivo's Santi Nolla says that the Primera title victory was the big plan for the club all along. “Barça prioritised the league as the most important competition of the season and achieved this. The Champions League attracts more attention but no-one recognised Chelsea as the best team in Europe.”

Tuesday’s Sport is calling for a fun few weeks for the Barça players over the final three matches, as the club tries to match Real Madrid’s 100-point total from last year. “Soon, some traumatic measures may be required,” writes J. Vehils in the inside pages. “However, it would be nice that some players end their time here with full honours.”

Among those are Eric Abidal and David Villa. However, Barceona's sporting director Andoni Zubizarreta told Cataluyna Radio that the situation with Tito Vilanova next season is not completely clear. “We know that a more aggressive process is to come in New York,” said Zubizarreta, “and we will reflect on it together.”

Hours after the celebrations were completed in the Catalan capital, there was proper football action to behold with Real Sociedad hosting Granada in a big chance to fend off the challenge from Valencia for fourth spot. Sadly for a biased blog, La Real blew it and conceded an injury-time equaliser in a 2-2 draw.

The point takes the Basque side into fourth, level on points with Valencia but ahead due to a superior head-to-head record. However, Champions League football remains in some doubt as La Real prepare for the last three-game sprint. “We’re ready to suffer and fight,” said manager Philippe Montanier on what will be required over the final three matches of la Liga.

"Yonder! Europe!" Montanier makes his point

A quick move to the second division now, and a curious result from the weekend is starting to make a few waves in Spain. Bottom-of-the-table, very relegated Xerez were paying a visit to the second-placed Girona. Remarkably, Xerez won 4-2, the southerners' first win since the beginning of November. This has triggered the suggestion that there may have been some kind of ‘incentive’ paid to the Xerez footballers to give a little bit extra in the match.

The suggestion was far from ruled out by Xerez sporting director Miguel Ángel Rondán, speaking to local radio station Cope Jerez on Monday. “I’m not going to ask about it in the dressing room. It doesn’t bother me. If they did it, good for them, they’ve not been paid for a while. I’m not going to criticise them.”

Atlético give Barça 90-minute guard of honour, but Mourinho's dark clouds have silver linings

2013-05-13T13:42:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's Spanish expert, Tim Stannard, rounds up the weekend's winners and losers from La Liga...

Good Day

Tito Vilanova
It was a genuine privilege to see and hear the Barcelona boss talking after the victory over Atlético Madrid that kept the Catalan club on course to equal Real Madrid’s 100 point total from the previous campaign. Although Vilanova admitted this milestone was not “super important”, La Liga Loca imagines it will be a pleasing cherry on top of the delicious cake that has been Barça's league campaign, though one that will likely be overlooked in years to come, thanks to the lack of any real opposition for the league crown.
One revealing point made by the Barcelona manager during Sunday’s chat with the media was how one of the hardest parts of a title win was the challenge for his players to keep up the momentum throughout the season. Maintaining the hefty gap over both Atlético Madrid and Real Madrid at the top of the table was was no easy feat.
The blog feels Barça president Sandro Rosell was correct in saying that “when people look back on this league title with a bit of perspective and time, it will grow in value every day,” due to the many setbacks that the club has suffered both of a sporting and human nature, but were able to overcome.

Roberto Soldado
The Valencia striker has now scored in five successive league matches for the first time in the his career. Indeed, Soldado scored twice in his latest outing, knocking in the first two for his team as they strolled to a 4-0 win at Rayo Vallecano. The victory moved Valencia into fourth, leap-frogging Real Sociedad, who play on Monday night very much under pressure from the persistent men from Mestalla.

Ruben Castro
Go, go gadget Betis. A 17th league goal of the season for Ruben Castro, gave Betis their first win in five games, boosting what had looked to be a doomed push for a Europa League spot. “We are the only team that can depend on themselves,” said a cheerful Pepe Mel, reviewing the pack of clubs behind Betis, which are also on the sniff for a bit of European action next season.

Sevilla
Incredibly - and rather lamentably - Sevilla’s goalless draw at Málaga on Sunday night moved Unai Emery’s men up to eighth and into what will be a European spot, should Málaga’s UEFA competition ban for next season be upheld. It’s a truly remarkable feat considering Sevilla have won just the single away match from 18 in la Liga. One game. In 18. Just think about that...

Valladolid
The Pucela side have trundled along without too much fanfare this season, but Valladolid have lead an utterly untroubled, professional campaign. This achievement was encapsulated in a solid 1-0 over Deportivo that put the side on 43 points with three games to go. “Staying up is like a title for us,” exclaimed a delighted Valladolid boss, Miroslav Djukic.

Levante
Levante's two matches since the breaking of the match-fixing scandal surrounding the 4-0 home defeat to Deportivo (and possibly the lackluster 1-0 home defeat to Celta Vigo, as well) have produced two hard-fought draws. However, the timing of the affair was not so good for Levante’s opponents in these matches, Mallorca last week and Zaragoza on Friday night. These are two sides who would have preferred a less ‘focussed’ Levante in huge games at the bottom.
The two points in two games have taken a little pressure off a Levante side being scrutinsed very closely due to the aforementioned fixing allegations, and have moved the Valencia club onto a fairly safe 42 point tally.

Athletic Bilbao
With a nine point gap between themselves and the relegation zone with three to play, the tremendously unspectacular 2-1 win against a Mallorca side down to ten men for two thirds of the match is probably enough to see out a forgettable campaign in safety for Marcelo Bielsa’s side. “The only good thing was the result. Everything else we did was bad,” admitted a glum Ariz Aduriz.

Fernando Llorente
What turned out to be the winner for Athletic was only Llorente’s first goal in San Mamés for the whole season.

Osasuna
What a weekend for the Pamplona club. Relegation rivals Zaragoza, Mallorca, Deportivo and Celta Vigo all dropped points (Granada yet to play, at the time of writing) and Osasuna took advantage by sneaking a giant win against Getafe. It was an old fashioned effort that did the happy deed for Osasuna, with a sneaky touch from a set-piece. Next week’s clash with Granada is set to be a big one, all right.

Bad Day

Real Madrid
Perhaps José Mourinho’s side belong in the ‘Good Day’ section instead. The league title was lost some time ago, so perhaps Madrid will have taken some pleasure from denying Barça what fun may have obtained by winning the title with a rousing victory in the Vicente Calderón. Instead, Real Madrid rolled over at Espanyol in a 1-1 draw to give Barça the title without having to play.

Raphael Varane
A knee knack during the Espanyol match sees the French defender missing Friday’s Copa del Rey final. However, it does give the Madrid manager a further opportunity to snub Pepe by playing Raúl Albiol alongside Sergio Ramos instead, so there’s a silver lining to every one of Mourinho’s dark clouds.

Atlético Madrid
It’s hard to blame the Rojiblancos for a somnambulant performance against visiting Barça, a side who were just as sleepy. “The guard of honour lasted all afternoon,” noted Marca’s match report.
Third place had already been secured, and there was no need for Atlético to go out with all guns blazing in the Vicente Calderón, with Friday’s cup final to think about. Despite this, Diego Simeone, must be doubting his team’s character a little.
Three weeks ago, a disinterested, stripped-down Real Madrid won 2-1 in Atlético’s home thanks to an own goal from Juanfran. On Sunday, a shot from David Villa that was going wide by a good two metres was somehow turned in by Gabi, to ease Barça to victory. “Let’s hope he scores again at the other end on Friday,” joked the team’s Argentinean manager, although LLL imagines Simeone was less amused at the time.

Málaga
A goalless draw at home to Sevilla sees Málaga’s previously impressive league campaign beginning to run out of porridge.

Rayo Vallecano
A defensive shambles of a performance for Rayo Vallecano in a midday defeat to visiting Valencia, whose forwards were waved through on goal, like a 747 docking at an airport gate. “I want to apologise to the fans, as we were lacking the freshness we had before,” announced coach, Paco Jémez, after the match.

Zaragoza
A goalless draw at Levante on Friday night was not quite what the doctor ordered for Zaragoza, although other results later in the weekend did go for the struggling side. “It doesn’t really do that much for us,” Zaragoza goalkeeper Roberto said of their single point.

Deportivo
Although referees are being blamed for Deportivo’s recent problems (by Deportivo), it is poor form that is really the cause of them picking up just three points from 12. Mallorca and Celta Vigo already look doomed, and Depor are next in line for the chop, if this carries on much longer.

Celta Vigo
The harsh fact of the matter is that Sunday’s 1-0 loss to Betis leaves Celta with one buttock sat in the second division. The Galicia club are three points from safety with only have two matches left, with next week’s game having been played last Wednesday due to Atlético Madrid’s participation in the Copa del Rey final. “While there’s still a ray of hope, we’ll have to try everything,” promised Celta boss, Abel Resino.

Gregorio Manzano
Not much is going right for the Mallorca boss these days. The Balearic club lost defender, Fontás, after 23 minutes for a nonexistent handball which triggered the second of two yellows for the footballer. Mallorca battled but came away with a 2-1 defeat to keep the side at the bottom with just 29 points. “We lost and we are leaving here sad, but with out heads held high,” claimed Manzano after Saturday’s defeat.

Levante’s vow of silence, Mallorca’s last stand & Atlético's Sunday siesta

2013-05-10T09:40:00Z

Friday

Levante (12th) v Zaragoza (16th) - 21.00
In a wise move that no doubt pleased the club’s lawyers no end, Levante are shutting up shop in terms of the current match fixing scandal, with the club reportedly under investigation by Spain’s prosecuting authorities. Sergio Ballesteros was due to talk to the press on Monday, but an appearance was cancelled. Speaking on Wednesday, manager Juan Ignacio Martínez announced that no comments would be made on the affair, but did have time to speak about the retirement of Sir Alex Ferguson, which made quite a few waves in Spain. “Manchester United have always been a reference point for their attacking play. Three or four moves that I’ve got in my notebook are copied from Ferguson,” admitted JIM, referring perhaps to Sir Alex’s rarely deployed ‘long ball-hoof’ tactic, that Levante adopt so regularly.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Saturday

Athletic Bilbao (14th) v Mallorca (20th) - 16.00
And now, the end is here....it certainly is for Mallorca, who can all but say goodbye to la Primera if Athletic are not vanquished in San Mamés. Mallorca would no doubt have much preferred to play an Athletic side that was safely snug in mid-table, with not much else to do aside from a bit of backgammon of a weekend to pass the time. Instead, the bottom-feeders face an Athletic side very much in trouble themselves, with just 38 points to their names and in rather poor form. “It’s a match that will make the difference between a quiet month or the start of a wobble and doubts arriving,” was the prognosis from Ander Herrera, who has been a bit of a bottom-lip trembler, in recent months.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Valladolid (13th) v Deportivo (18th) - 18.00
A couple of comments made about the match-fixing scandal over the last seven days came from figures involved in this particular tie. Valladolid president Carlos Suárez is a confirmed believer that some games are rigged, but says “there has never been evidence to prove it. Every year, we get strange results, comments, and on top of that you listen to players behind closed doors who say that these things go on.”
One footballer who certainly doesn’t want to hear such talk is Depor’s Juan Carlos Valerón, who this week announced that rumours of match fixing in the game between Levante and his side left him feeling 'stunned'.
“We don’t want anything to do with this,” said the veteran midfielder.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Osasuna (17th) v Getafe (8th) - 20.00
Before Monday night, Osasuna might have been viewing Saturday's visit of Getafe in the same way a comfy pair of slippers is viewed after a dark and stormy day: cosy and accommodating. Actually, that sounds a bit wrong. Anyway, Getafe appeared to have given up on their campaign, but a home win against Real Sociedad suggests there may be some fight in the old Coliseum sea dog yet, which is exactly what Osasuna don’t need.
“It’s a great dream for me and I get this over to the players,” said Getafe boss, Luis García Plaza, on the idea of European football.
While Osasuna’s future may well involve the words ‘second division’, Getafe have been forging ahead with a bright new future. As always, the club have been scooping up players who are about to be out of contract from struggling Primera sides. Getafe president, Angel Torres, announced that a deal had been done for Celta Vigo fullback Roberto Lago, but also noted that “we need some departures” from a squad currently containing 33 players. That includes Dani Güiza, who is going to be rather difficult to shift.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Espanyol (11th) v Real Madrid (2nd) - 22.00
Here’s LLL with your condensed Real Madrid nonsense and news taken from the morning papers over the past few days...
José Mourinho is still wanting to go to Chelsea. José Mourinho is trying to make internal changes so he can stay. Pepe isn’t happy. Sergio Ramos wants everyone to get along. Neither Mourinho nor Aitor Karanka will be speaking ahead of Saturday’s Espanyol match, as neither can be trusted. Potentially, neither will be talking to the media ahead of Friday’s cup final for pretty much the same reason. Oh, Friday's Marca leads with the news that Zinedine Zidane will be returning to the club in some kind of institutional, director-of-things role. He’s taken courses and everything.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Sunday

Rayo Vallecano (10th) v Valencia (5th) - 12.00
AS are claiming that Ernesto Valverde is a strong favourite to take over from Marcelo Bielsa at Athletic Bilbao this summer. It’s a story which kicked off when the Valencia boss took over at Mestalla in December, after rumours bubbled up that the coach had already lined up for the San Mamés club. The fact nobody really knows who is charge of Valencia to make decisions on what to do with Valverde is certainly not persuading the coach to stay put.
The managerial future at Rayo Vallecano is also still murky, with Paco Jémez and the administrators yet to see eye-to-eye on a new contract. This problem has, in turn, prevented any of the players with soon-to-expire deals from signing on for the upcoming campaign.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Real Betis (7th) v Celta Vigo (19th) - 17.00
Three games in a week sees a bit of an accelerated relegation process for poor Celta Vigo, a side that lost 3-1 at home to Atlético Madrid on Wednesday evening, but were still applauded off the pitch by supporters. There was yet more bad news from the Galician club, when it was confirmed they had lost Mario Bermejo for up to six months with a cruciate ligament tear.
Celta’s 31 point tally now sees the side probably needing to win all three of their remaining games, but midfielder Borja Oubiña is putting on a fairly blustery, Braveheart face on the challenge to come. “This team is not going to give up,” declared the captain. “Not until the season is over.” That could well be on Sunday afternoon, for all intents and purposes.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Atlético Madrid (3rd) v Barcelona (1st) - 19.00
Time for Atlético Madrid to stretch and gurgle on Sunday and play Adrían as the sole striker. An enormous capitulation at the Vicente Calderón would both ease Barcelona to the league title and rest Atlético’s big hitters ahead of next Friday’s Copa del Rey final.
The Rojiblancos had their round 36 match moved forward to last Wednesday due to the final, and duly beat Celta Vigo 3-1 to secure third spot and guaranteed Champions League football. “It’s a big day for Atlético Madrid and I thank everyone that works at the club for contributing to make this a reality,” said Diego Simeone. However, the Atlético boss promised that it won’t be spa time on Sunday evening, despite LLL's suggestions to the contrary. “We can’t allow ourselves to relax for the next game for the status that Barça and because we never do that.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Málaga (6th) v Sevilla (9th) - 21.00
Poor Manuel Pellegrini seemed to be getting towards the end of his Chilean tether after the 6-2 defeat to Madrid at the Santiago Bernabéu. “It wasn’t a match as we didn’t have two teams playing under the same conditions,” was the complaint from the Málaga boss after two red cards were handed out to his team.
The defeat does seem to have finally finished off Málaga’s chances of a top four finish and the danger now is that the last three games for the southern club become a bit of an ordeal after a trying campaign. “We are coming to the end of a very difficult year in many aspects,” admitted Pellegrini. “When a team sells players it means economically it needs to and the conditions are not of those of the four best teams in Spain. What happens next year in an unknown.” The bright spark for Málaga is that Sevilla are in town on Sunday, the team with just the single away win from 16 this season.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Monday

Real Sociedad (4th) v Granada (15th) - 22.00
There’s nothing quite like poking your nose in where it doesn’t belong, and that’s what Granada striker, Carlos Aranda, did this week with his thoughts on match-fixing. More accurately, the footballer known for being a genuine hard-case that LLL is quite scared of, was most unhappy that Levante’s José Barkero had apparently doubted the integrity of four team-mates during the infamous Deportivo defeat, and had apologised publicly for doing so. “It’s not worth the saliva to talk about someone who has sullied the image of Spanish football and these four professionals,” warned the irate footballer.
Real Sociedad, meanwhile, have nicer things to concern themselves with, and that’s finishing fourth by bouncing back from defeat to Getafe on Monday night after 15 matches unbeaten. “Nothing has changed,” promised defender, Alberto de la Bella. Let’s hope not.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mourinho proves honesty isn't always the best policy, as rumours continue

2013-05-08T11:41:00Z

One peculiarity you need to get used to when you move to Spain is the tendency for the locals to speak in a fashion that could only be described as 'direct'. In stuffier climes, a friend pointing out that you're fat, ugly or smell funny would be considered rude. In Spain, it is simply seen as being honest and up-front.

For that reason, José Mourinho is currently being a great friend to Real Madrid and the media. Traditionally, Mourinho had deployed assistant Aitor Karanka to speak on the club’s behalf before and after league games, but in recent weeks, the manager has been eager to take the opportunity to step up and feed the football media’s burning need for gossip and scandal.

The Portuguese coach has managed to infuriate the local press by giving what he would argue are straight, honest answers to questions in regards to the club, its supporters, its players and the media themselves. Of course, the Madrid boss could have heeded the call from Florentino Pérez on Monday for unity by choosing Karanka to chat about Wednesday’s meeting with Málaga, but there would be no fun in that whatsoever.

In response to being asked what he thought about Pepe’s public support of Iker Casillas, who is currently outcast on the bench alongside the Portuguese centre-back, Mourinho boldly said: “it’s easy to analyse. His problem has a name and it’s Raphael Varane. From this point, there’s no story.”

When probed on his attitude to the club captain, Mourinho's answer was another seemingly honest one. “I like Diego López more than Iker Casillas. It’s simple. I don’t have a personal problem with him, it’s not a decision that’s deliberately against one person. I like him more.”

Mourinho’s ongoing fun and games has certainly scandalised AS, with editor Alfredo Relaño fuming that Tuesday’s chat was “a prolonged exercise in moral cowardliness that disrespected Madrid, but above all Florentino Pérez...a masochistic victim of the excesses of an insubordinate subordinate.”

The Málaga match at the Santiago Bernabéu feels of secondary importance to the soap opera surrounding it, despite the fact that if Madrid fail to win, Barça will be crowned champions. Málaga also have hopes for a Champions League spot, which is why it’s a little unfair that the team are currently having to play three matches in a week followed by a weekend off. Celta Vigo face the same situation, thanks to Liga bosses scheduling the Copa del Rey final on the same weekend as a round of league fixtures, hence the requirement to move the games involving the two finalists to Wednesday night.

Atlético Madrid know that a victory in Vigo will guarantee the club third place in the league and a Champions League group stage spot for next season. Keeping a clean sheet against Celta for 17 minutes will also give keeper Thibaut Courtois a club record for not conceding away from home. The current landmark of 613 minutes is coincidentally held by current Celta boss Abel Resino, so expect an early bombardment on the Rojiblanco goal. “To beat my record, he’s going to have to stop a lot more,” promised the former Atlético goalie.

Although it seems like a couple of strange games stuck away on a Wednesday night, there’s an awful lot at stake for the four teams involved. But no matter what happens, it’s likely it will once again be Mourinho making headlines - not least thanks to the news Sir Alex Ferguson is about to free-up the Manchester United hot seat.

Messi makes the difference, Mourinho makes friends, Espanyol make a mess

2013-05-07T09:47:00Z

Our man in Madrid, Tim Stannard, rounds up the best and worst of the weekend's La Liga action

Good Day

Leo Messi
This is becoming a bit of pattern. Leo Messi sits on the bench and Barça are being held by Betis 2-2, having had to come from behind twice. The Argentinean comes off the aforementioned touchline seating, scoring just four minutes later. Then the Barça hero gets his second to make it 46 in la Liga this season. Not bad, really.

Real Madrid
A fairly strong line-up from José Mourinho and a fairly surprising scoreline in a bit of a mad game that saw a 4-3 win against Valladolid for the home side, to make Barcelona wait at least another weekend to pick up the league title.

Atlético Madrid
Mission accomplished for Atlético Madrid - Champions League football for next season has been achieved, after the point at Deportivo in a goalless draw. Well, at least the qualifying stages anyway, with the Rojiblancos still having a tiny bit of work to do before securing third spot and a longer summer holiday. “It’s a first step,” was the conclusion from Diego Simeone.

Roberto Soldado
The opening goal in the 4-0 win over Osasuna saw Valencia striker 'Bobby Soldier' move onto 19 Liga strikes for the season, the forward’s best tally in a career that has spanned Real Madrid, Osasuna, Getafe and Valencia. The 27-year-old - quite possibly the next big sale from Mestalla - led a bright afternoon for Valencia, who bounced back quickly from the setback of last weekend’s 4-2 defeat to Real Sociedad.

Sevilla
A 3-0 victory for Sevilla over Espanyol still gives Unai Emery hope of qualifying for Europe. If it weren’t for that pesky away game business that sees just the single victory from 16 matches in la Liga, that is. The issue is “every time we have to get on a bus, train or plane to leave Sevilla,” admitted the manic manager.

Alvaro Negredo
The Sevilla forward now has 20 goals this season in la Liga, making it a fun duel to be top Spanish striker with Roberto Soldado, who is just one goal behind.

Levante
Not losing heavily under suspicious circumstances constitutes a good day for Levante, in a performance at Mallorca that was watched very carefully indeed. Levante came away with a point that “honours my players,” thought manager, Juan Ignacio Martínez.

Granada
The Andalusian side are certainly playing with something in their pre-match cups of tea. That special additive is identity, so said manager Lucas Alcaraz after his team pulled out a second 1-0 victory in a row, with a cheeky win over Málaga.

Zaragoza
Winning is so much easier when the first goal comes from a penalty awarded after the ball hits the back of a visiting defender’s knee. That was the luck Zaragoza enjoyed during their 3-0 victory over Rayo Vallecano. Nonsense. Nonsense. Nonsense.

Spain’s Mothers
It was Mothering Sunday in Spain, which saw tributes from players and the papers to these most wonderful of souls. Sort of. AS were a little insulting, by suggesting that Espanyol’s defending was like that of a group of mothers, while Marca went back to the 1950s with a tribute to apron-sporting “mothers who clean boots, wake (their sons) to get them to games, make them numerous breakfasts...”

Bad Day

José Mourinho
The Madrid boss probably doesn’t give two hoots about being booed by fans in the Santiago Bernabéu after last week's comments about the club, its supporters and its goalkeepers. However, Mourinho may have been a little stung by the remarks by the normally loyal Pepe, who took umbrage at his manager saying that he wished he had signed Diego López earlier in his tenure and that “problems exist when one thinks he’s above everyone else.”
“The declarations from the boss weren’t the most appropriate,” sniffed the defender after a leaky performance against Valladolid. “You have to have a bit more respect.” Fortunately for Mourinho, assistant Aitor Karanka was on hand to note that “a lack of respect is to play someone who is not in a condition to play who doesn’t deserve to. Here you don’t play due to status.” Ouch.

Real Sociedad
Why Getafe? Why? Why? Why? Why? In previous matches, you’ve looked so disinterested, but suddenly on Monday night at ten, you have to beat Real Sociedad, ending a run of 15 games without defeat. Why? La Real’s progress to the Champions League places should have been a smooth passage, but this has been messed up with Valencia now just two points behind.

Málaga
Still doing the business at home, but much like a squished hedgehog, they're having a few problems on the road. They've taken just two points from 15 on their travels.

Paco Jémez
La Liga Loca was looking forward to hearing the Rayo Vallecano manager’s thoughts on Zaragoza's controversial first goal against his side. Sadly, heat-stroke apparently prevented the boss of the Madrid side from talking post-match.

Espanyol
“Whenever we talk about Europe, we sh*t ourselves, and against Sevilla we did this to the maximum,” was the brutal opinion of Javier Aguirre after his team lost 3-0 to Sevilla.

Athletic Bilbao
The Basque side are still in trouble. Despite having 38 points on the board with four games to play, they look to be struggling to get enough juice into the cannon to pick up the victory which will probably see them over the finishing line. The 1-1 at Celta continues a run of five matches without a win for the Bilbao outfit, two defeats followed by three draws.

Osasuna
A disastrous performance for the Pamplona in the 4-0 defeat to Valencia also saw two of their brave boys sent off. The northern side has just the one victory from the past nine matches, form that would send the team down to la Segunda should it continue. “We are honourable and we fight but lack a bit of cunning,” lamented Osasuna boss, José Luis Mendilibar.

Deportivo
Four wins in row have been followed by three draws for Deportivo, who are still in all sorts of trouble on 32 points and back in the relegation zone. A poor refereeing display affected both teams on Saturday night in equal measure, but Depor probably were the better off with the point, on chances. “What’s important is that we have one more point and we’ve gone one more game without losing,” said a positive-spinning Fernando Vázquez.

Celta Vigo
They may well have snuck into the Good Day section due to getting a point against a visiting Athletic Bilbao in a 1-1 draw, a side who blew some ridiculous chances. Oscar de Marcos had but the Basque side into the lead, but Iago Aspas equalised with seven minutes to go, in a home match that Celta really needed to have won. But they didn’t, so hey-ho...

Gregorio Manzano
On Sunday morning, Mallorca were unlucky enough to face a Levante side that had to put in at least a half-decent performance after talk of a lack of commitment in two of their previous three games. This saw Mallorca only managing a 1-1 in the Balearics, to leave the club pretty much sunk at the bottom of the table on 29 points with four matches left. “There are options so we are not going to throw in the towel,” said a defiant Manzano.

La Preview: Levante under suspicion, Piqué talks out of turn and Atlético’s adventure

2013-05-03T10:39:00Z

FRIDAY

Celta Vigo (18th) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) – 21.00
Valencia’s Ernesto Valverde is thought to be the first choice to replace Marcelo Bielsa at Athletic in the summer – should the Argentinian leave, that is. You’ll have to work with La Liga Loca a little bit here, as multiple strands of existence are quite the norm in la Liga. Valverde spent six years playing at the club and two years managing it from 2003, and was supposedly lined up for the gig next season, before a detour to Mestalla came along.

However, in recent months a challenger has burst forth in Cuco Ziganda, a manager many may remember for his starring role as coach at such teams as Osasuna. The former Athletic Bilbao centre forward is currently doing a fine job in charge of the club’s ‘B’ team and admits that he “hears and reads things” about the possibility of taking over Bielsa’s crouching/coaching duties over the summer. “I’m sure that everything that happens next year will be good,” said a confident Cuco.
LLL Prediction – Draw

SATURDAY

Valencia (6th) v Osasuna (15th) – 16.00
Valencia have a plan. If fact they so shocked themselves with such a bold, untried notion that they had to have a bit of sit-down to take it all in. The third president of the month, Aurelio Martínez, this week showed the local media a Powerpoint presentation to communicate how to get Valencia out of its current mess – an old stadium they can’t sell, a new(ish) one they can’t finish, and a debt north of €300m.

“It’s not a Utopia,” promised Martínez on a strategy which is based around completing the new ground and stuffing it to the rafters, Dortmund-style, with punters paying cheap prices. However, to complete the project, funding will have to be found and fast. “In two years, if we don’t finish it, there’s no next step,” warned the latest Mestalla messiah.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Granada (16th ) v Málaga (5th) – 18.00
If Granada were by chance to go down this season, then it would be a tad unfair if others such as Deportivo, Mallorca and Zaragoza were to survive. Granada have actually had a fairly consistent campaign and haven't been in the relegation zone for 18 rounds, when the southern side plopped into the poop at the beginning of Christmas. Still, matters have improved a little for the club with four points (which should probably have been six) from the last two games.

Málaga rumble into town on Saturday with the future just as unclear as in previous weeks, with the latest rumours claiming that Manuel Pellegrini is being chatted up by Manchester City. “It’s not going to be easy to get him to stay,” admitted sporting director Mario Husillos, “but the club is working with the idea that he does.”
LLL Prediction – Draw

Real Madrid (2nd) v Valladolid (12th) – 20.00
If there’s one member of the World of Real Madrid who can sit back and shrug that he had nothing to do with that Borussia Dortmund business, it’s Iker Casillas, who watched the match from the bench, as he has been doing since returning from injury to find a Diego López in fine form.

However, there a bright spot on the horizon for Casillas with the probable departure of José Mourinho, something that must have contributed to a promise made on Thursday that “the my future is with Real Madrid, because I have a contract, I’ve been here since I was nine, it’s the club for the whole of my life, it’s where I want to be.”

Casillas then went on to talk about the other benefits of the club, such as the promise that his dressing room locker will be moved further away from the toilets and the usefulness of the Fury of Pepe when the drinks machine refuses to give the goalkeeper his change.
LLL Prediction – Home win, awful match

Deportivo (17th ) v Atlético Madrid (3rd) – 22.00
What do you do if you want to escape a set of fans who've had it up to the armpits with you after losing yet another derby against your rivals' ‘B’ team? You leg it to Azerbaijan, that’s what you do. The Rojiblancos were in Baku for a few days, as part of the sponsorship deal with the nation that likes to call itself “the Land of Fire”. There was a tour of some of the local sites, a press conference, a coaching clinic and an exhibition game thrown in for good measure, won 3-0.

Probably better than three days on a wet training ground in the outskirts of Madrid. Arda Turan, whose wonderful hair gets bigger by the day, certainly seemed to enjoy himself under different skies. “We are full of excitement over the importance our visit has for the country,” beamed the playmaker.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SUNDAY

Mallorca (20th) v Levante (13th) – 12.00
LLL knew something fishy was going on at Levante. Three weeks ago, they lost 4-0 at home to Deportivo. “Strangely subdued stuff from Levante,” wrote the blog at the time. Two weeks ago, the team nearly held Barça at the Camp Nou. Then it was another hopeless home performance and a defeat in Valencia to Celta Vigo, which had manager Juan Ignacio Martínez questioning the footballers’ professionalism.

Marca have whiffed a rat too and speak of a giant dressing room bust-up at the club, kicking off at half-time during the Deportivo debacle, with some (particularly José Barkero) questioning the commitment of others. This in turn has caused a rift with the manager – and left Mallorca rubbing their hands with glee at the chance of taking on a squabbling rabble in the side’s last, last, last chance to stay up.

Barkero has since apologised publicly to Sergio Ballesteros, Gustavo Munúa, Juanlu and Juanfran, the four players the midfielder reportedly suggested weren’t giving their all. However, on Friday morning the Spanish league announced an investigation into Levante 0-4 Deportivo, something that had caused Levante president Quico Catalan to face the media on Thursday. “We aren’t afraid of any investigation. Lies and truths have been told but it’s important that the affair is closed. Any player who has done something like this won’t wear the Levante shirt again,” added Catalan.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Real Zaragoza (19th ) v Rayo Vallecano (8th) – 17.00
After the unpleasant odours wafting from Levante's direction, here's something heart-warming: the story of how a pre-match talk from a special guest helped Zaragoza achieve their first win of 2013. Paralympian Javier Hernández was invited to speak to the players last Saturday morning. “I was sure it was a mental problem,” he said of Zaragoza’s sporting issues. “They are better than last year.”

Hernández, who also works as a journalist, was born without arms and one leg shorter than the other, told the players that “I was born at the bottom of the table – but not with zero points, but minus 15.” After the chat, Zaragoza player Víctor Rodriguez admitted that “he gave us goosebumps with his spirit of recovery.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Sevilla (10th) v Espanyol (11th) – 19.00
Oh, this is going to be fun. Two sides who talk a good game about making a push for Europe – if Málaga’s ban is upheld to potentially free up a spot – but don’t really mean it. Unai Emery had claimed the side only needed two more wins, whilst Espanyol were going for gold until last week’s home defeat to Granada, another surprising result at the bottom of the table this season.

Worrying news for Sevilla though is the notion that Jesús Navas, a fine footballer who is seeing his career stall somewhat, isn’t ruling out a move away from the club he's been at for 13 years. “I don’t know if I will be here or not next season, I’m just focused on what’s left,” admitted the home-loving winger, who added who said that he would “quite like to develop as a footballer.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Betis (7th) – 21.00
Cheer up Barça fans! It’s not all bad in the Catalan capital. Your side is about to win the league with a whopping lead over Real Madrid. There's still one or two decent footballers in the squad. Barça aren't completely bankrupt, unlike most sides in la Primera (although that’s partly the fault of yourselves and Real Madrid due to the TV money carve-up) and there’s talk of a bit splurge to bring in the likes of Neymar and Mats Hummels.

Mundo Deportivo are throwing David de Gea and Isco into the transfer mix. The paper’s director Santi Nolla also slaps Gerard Piqué on the botty for stating the obvious that signings need to be made. “A footballer should not dictate what needs to be done, especially when decisions can affect teammates you are with in the dressing room every day."
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY

Getafe (9th) v Real Sociedad (4th) – 22.00
Wow! What a chance for la Real fans to have a day out in the Spanish capital, to fill the Coliseum, to rejoice in a fantastic season that sees the side edging closer to the Champions League. Nonsense of course, as the Spanish game is run by particularly slow baboons who have stuck this match at 10 o’clock on a Monday night with public transport out of Getafe being a touch sketchy at the end of the game.

This has prevented some 2,500 supporters travelling down from San Sebastian, something which is a bit of a downer all round for Xabi Prieto. “No-one likes playing on a Monday night, it makes the weekend long and it’s a shame thousands of fans who would travel, if it was a Saturday or Sunday, can’t do it.” A disgrace.
LLL Prediction – Away win

José Mourinho needs love, Barcelona need a miracle

2013-05-01T09:55:00Z

Having come so near (well, nearish) to reaching the Champions League final, there were a fair few moans, groans and tears from the Real Madrid players after their whopping semi-final epic against Borussia Dortmund. Yet one player remained relatively straight-faced - a certain goalkeeper and club captain who spent the evening sat on the bench, and would have done the same at Wembley, had Real Madrid prevailed. La Liga Loca imagines that may not have been a fun experience.

While early misses from the Real Madrid forward line ultimately cost the side what would've been an incredible victory against Dortmund, the crowd certainly didn't let the side down. The noise in the opening ten minutes and closing period was as loud as anything the blog can remember in Real Madrid’s back yard.

However, the German side were worthy winners over the two legs, although this will be overlooked a little in the Madrid press thanks to one or two thunder-stealing post-match revelations from José Mourinho. This is why ITV should be applauded for cutting off the Madrid coach just before his possible “I’m off to Chelsea” confession.

Still, Mourinho saved a few zingers for the press conference, with a “nobody likes me and I do care” diatribe admitting that “of course, I want to be where people love me without reservation, where they love all aspects of me.”

The soon-to-be-departing Madrid manager revealed that “in England, they love me. Especially one club.” A great day for Port Vale is around the corner perhaps, unless LLL’s tea-leaves are very much wrong this morning.

There will be plenty of time to digest Mourinho’s latest moans over the weeks to come, but for the moment, the local papers are still clutching their tissues thinking about what might have been, had Real Madrid tried a little harder at winning an injury time penalty. “I believed,” declared Marca’s headline on Wednesday.

“Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. Goodbye to the Champions League final,” wrote AS editor, Alfredo Relaño. “But a great goodbye, a suffered goodbye after an assault on the castle that was the 4-1 from the first leg.” Poor Tomás Roncero is a little distraught after a third successive semi-final failure, and slams the “cowardly” Howard Webb for not giving Cristiano Ronaldo a late penalty, even though that was probably the brave move to make considering the stadium the referee was in at the time. The AS columnist also has some parting words for José Mourinho, writing that “in three years he never understood the greatness of this club. I feel more part of Madrid than ever.”

Over in the Catalan capital, Sport are all with the nastiness with the headline of “Goodbye Mou! Disaster complete.” Inside, Josep Maria Casanovas opines that a similar night of drama in the Camp Nou is unlikely with Barcelona 4-0 down to Bayern Munich. “Don’t be mistaken, we are not pessimistic, we are realistic. But despite this, Barcelona should not give up anything for lost. Mundo Deportivo are only half gloating at Real Madrid’s misery, with a split front cover that boasts of “Barça pride” and chuckles at “Goodbye to The Tenth.”

Although a 4-0 deficit has never been overturned in the Champions League, the Barça camp are doing their duty by talking a good fight. “If there’s one team that can comeback from 4-0, it’s Barça. If we fall short, then we have to fall short well,” said Tito Vilanova. Gerard Piqué rather tickled LLL’s tummy by saying that “it’s a day to be kids again, to believe and to stop having the common sense that characterises us.”

If there’s one thing Real Madrid have taught Barça, it’s that goals are fairly important in football, and teams often have a tendency to fall to pieces once one or two have been scored. Much like their rivals on Tuesday night, Barcelona have to score early to have a chance, but a couple of moments of Messi magic before half time...and Piqué’s dreams may come true.

Operation 3-0: Real Madrid hopeful of another famous comeback

2013-04-30T08:57:00Z

The reason there has been little or no local media criticism of Real Madrid's 4-1 defeat to Borussia Dortmund is simple - all good (or bad) things come to those who wait. Why burn bridges with the club when another legendary comeback may still be possible?

Last Thursday’s AS front page should have been something along the lines of “Merciful Zeus, how badly can a team play? What a disastrous result, goodbye Champions League.” But perhaps condensed a little. Instead the cheerful, stiff-upper-lip banner headline was “Operation 3-0!”

A tremendously positive front cover on Tuesday’s Marca follows the same theme. “3-0 and it’s Wembley!” is the reminder from the paper ahead of the whopper in the Bernabéu. Despite the home side being 4-1 down against a team who are quite likely to score a goal against a leaky defence, any kind of self-doubt has been banished until at least half-past ten on what looks set to be a cold, rainy night in Madrid.

“The Bernabéu will score the first goal,” says the paper of its cunning plan for The Great Comeback, a repeat of last season’s “the fans are the 12th man” campaign which worked so well in the Champions League semi-final against Bayern Munich. The main participation of the spectators ended up being to catch a penalty from Sergio Ramos.

AS are continuing a somewhat morbid “Spirit of Juanito” theme, the usual narrative trotted out when an almighty dog’s dinner of a first leg has been made and the assistance of a former player, famous for leading legendary comebacks who was tragically killed in a car accident in 1992, is required.

The paper’s front cover on Tuesday features a photograph of the footballer, a continuation from a most peculiar “Sixth Sense” article from Tomás Roncero in Monday’s edition that declared “Juanito has not gone. Only his body has. He’s playing against Borussia,” wrote the biggest Madridista of them all, who may well be a ghost himself, Bruce Willis-style (spoiler alert). “Madrid always have Juanito warming up on the sidelines.”

In terms of actions that may actually help, the Real Madrid players were bundled in front of a video camera and told to look stern, fold their arms and order the fans in the Bernabéu on Tuesday night to support them, in a promotional campaign to get a normally cold-blooded fan base to put down their bird seed and make some noise.

José Mourinho - aside from moaning that if the Great Comeback doesn’t work, then it will be his disaster - saw the happy Real Madrid camp as a huge positive. He noted that “no player has jumped ship and everyone wants to play so this makes me think that it’s possible.”

Speaking some five hours after his Madrid equivalent, Dortmund coach Jürgen Klopp was his usual entertaining self when asked if he thought his team could choke on the big night. “No” was his immediate response, with no further explanation required.

Knocking three past Borussia Dortmund is certainly not above the abilities of Real Madrid, a side “who did everything badly” in the first leg. It's not conceding a goal that could prove the hardest challenge. The Santiago Bernabéu has been a bit of a free buffet for visiting teams this season, with Real Betis, Levante, Mallorca and Real Sociedad scoring in Madrid’s home in 2013. Then there’s Borussia Dortmund knocking in a couple at the beginning of November in the Champions League group clash between the pair.

However, as Juanito once said in broken Italian; “90 minutes in the Santiago Bernabeu is a long time.” But this can work both ways. A couple of goals for Real Madrid and one more needed with 15 minutes could see the most dramatic of evenings. But an early opener for Borussia Dortmund and more of the same punishment for Madrid as witnessed in Germany last week could see 90 minutes feeling like years for the home support.

Atlético miss opportunity to end derby jinx, as Mallorca slide towards the drop

2013-04-29T11:08:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's man in Spain, Tim Stannard, on the best and the worst of the weekend's la Primera action...

Good Day

Leo Messi
Barely eight minutes after coming onto the pitch, little Leo popped up with a Playstation effort, shimmying and shammying through the Athletic defence before placing an exquisite shot to temporarily put Barça into the lead. “Messi is the best in the world, and clearly when we don’t have him, we miss him,” admitted Jordi Roura.

Real Madrid
A run of 25 matches and nearly 15 years without losing to Atlético Madrid is an incredible record. A ridiculous one, in fact. Of course, Real Madrid’s ‘reserves’ are still going to be pretty good, as some Atlético Madrid’s players pointed out, but a left flank consisting of Nacho and Alvaro Morata should have been beatable. “On Saturday, they both played badly, so Madrid won. If they had both played well, Madrid would have won,” wrote Alfredo Relaño in AS after an unexpectedly rotten match with an expected result.

Real Sociedad
A magnificent Sunday night game against Valencia brought another stunning performance from Real Sociedad. This, in turn, led to a feisty 4-2 victory which extended their unbeaten run to 15 games. The huge win over direct Champions League rivals gives la Real a five point lead over Málaga in fifth and Valencia and six, with 15 points left to play for. “We have a great advantage with 50 metres left,” revealed la Real boss, Philippe Montanier.

Málaga
A handy, no nonsense 2-1 win at home to Getafe keeps the side in the chase for a European spot, should the club’s current one year ban be overturned on appeal. “It would be a great achievement to be in the Europa League for the effort we’ve made,” said a proud Manuel Pellegrini.

Bukaneros
While most fans who complain about kick-off times, prices and other such footballing gripes still stand and support their team regardless, Rayo’s Ultras do things properly. When the Bukaneros aren’t happy about a Friday or Monday night kick-off (the former being the issue this week in a 2-2 draw with Osasuna) then they vacate their spot in the stadium, to leave a giant gaping hole. At the front of an enormous space on the terraces in Vallecas, a big banner read “No to Football on Friday.”

Valladolid
La Liga Loca feels 39 points is enough to keep a team up this season, so Valladolid’s draw with Sevilla was a pretty big result, given it moved them to 40 points with five matches left to play.

Ander Herrera
There’s still some battling spirit left at Athletic Bilbao, with the feisty midfielder popping up in the 89th minute to earn a 2-2 draw against the Champions elect. The players “deserved something more than a dignified defeat,” announced Marcelo Bielsa.

Osasuna
“A good point, a tough game and hard-fought,” was the opinion of Osasuna boss, José Luis Mendilibar, after the 2-2 draw with Rayo that gives a kick start to the Pamplona motor after three matches without a goal. The Osasuna efforts in this match were old-school - two headers from corners.

Granada
Finally, a win for Granada after nine matches without a victory, and a continuation of the good form shown in last week’s draw with Valladolid. “There are teams who are going to be in a ‘nothing zone’ and this could be beneficial to those who play them. These types of teams will be the judges of the competition,” mused Granada boss, Lucas Alcaraz.

Celta Vigo
Two wins in two matches for a struggling Celta have certainly seen the Galicians perk up a little. However, Saturday’s 1-0 win could not have been any easier against a completely lame Levante.

Real Zaragoza
Well, that was epic. After a run of 15 matches without a win, Zaragoza finally picked up a victory in a la Romareda humdinger against relegation rivals Mallorca. The lead switched sides throughout the match, but it was Rubén Rochina that popped up with a winner in the 3-2 victory just two minutes from time. “The dressing room has an incredible human quality,” beamed a relieved Zaragoza boss, Manolo Jiménez. Zaragoza are still second-from-bottom of the table but a win’s a win’s a win.

Bad Day

Diego Simeone
The Atlético Madrid boss looked really, really, really, really, really fed up after his side completely surrendered against Real Madrid, who might as well have rolled onto the pitch wearing “Kick me!” signs. Oh, he was fed up. In fact, he was smiling, laughing, hand-rubbing and extremely amiable after the game, in the manner of someone who was about to lose it completely. However, Simeone still seemed to think the Rojiblancos have a chance in the biggest meeting of the season between the two teams, the upcoming Copa del Rey final. “Very few people think this will happen, but it’s better that way,” said Simeone.

Valencia
The 4-2 defeat to Real Sociedad that leaves the Mestalla club five points behind Real Sociedad - and with a worse goal difference - could be very costly for Valencia in terms of losing Champions League revenue. Roberto Soldado’s sale, a player with 18 league goals this season, would surely be on the cards.

Sevilla
Still Sevilla, still useless away from home. The 1-1 at Valladolid keeps up a record for the Andalusian club of one victory from 17 trips in la Liga. Still, there’s still hope for some kind of success this season says a chirpy Unai Emery. “We’ve not been at the level that we’ve had at home, but we are two wins away from Europe.”

Espanyol
“If we want to get into Europe, we need to do it, not talk about it,” announced Javier Aguirre after the 1-0 home defeat to Granada.

Levante
Another veeeeeery flat home performance against a relegation team with a lot of incentive to pick up a victory. Two weeks ago, Deportivo came along and got a 4-0 win, and this weekend it was Celta Vigo who picked up a win to give the Galicians back-to-back victories. Levante were also charitable enough to miss a penalty. “The facts are that we lost at home against two teams in the relegation zone,” said a somewhat miffed and disappointed Celta boss, Juan Ignacio Martínez, “when a professional goes out onto the pitch, he wants to win.” Mallorca and Zaragoza are next up, so let’s see how giving Levante are over the weeks to come.

Mallorca
“It’s a step back,” admitted Mallorca boss Gregorio Manzano after the defeat to Zaragoza which left the Balearic club bottom of the table. Things are looking better for next weekend though, with Levante heading to town.

Can an Atlético Madrid miracle bring Barça the title?

2013-04-26T10:04:00Z

FRIDAY

Rayo Vallecano (8th) v Osasuna (15th) - 21.00
It’s going to be a fine evening indeed for those Vallecas urchins who linger in the street, behind the gap where a football stand should be, to catch errant balls during Rayo home games. Osasuna are in town, and they love a bit of wayward shooting combined with long-ball hoofs.

Nevertheless, la Primera's lowest-scoring side (26 strikes in 32 games) may fancy their chances of grinding out a horrendous sixth goalless draw against a Rayo Vallecano team who are looking more at the future than the present.

There’s still no word on the destiny of Rayo coach Paco Jémez, which may be having a knock-on effect with the players, many of whom are out of contract this summer – including top scorer Piti, who has been linked with a move to Saudi Arabia but says that a decision won’t be made until the end of the season.
LLL Prediction - Draw

SATURDAY

Levante (12th) v Celta Vigo (19th) - 16.00
Celta may be second-bottom, but nothing can possibly go wrong with the inspired tactical plan set out by president Carlos Mouriño. “We can’t stop until we get out of the drop zone,” announced the Galician big-wig. A lot of whether that is going to be possible or not depends on if the returning Iago Aspas is ready to bang in some goals after suspension.

However, when the head-butting forward talked to the press this week, the hottest topic was a possible move to Valencia. “I have no pre-contract signed with Valencia,” sighed a weary Aspas. “Celta have always made it clear that if a club wants me they have to pay the €10m clause and that’s it.”

Meanwhile, there has been movement in the contract extension of Levante coach Juan Ignacio Martínez, despite him saying that he would be delighted to stay on should his bosses want him.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Athletic Bilbao (14th) v Barcelona (1st) - 18.00
If Barça beat Athletic Bilbao and Real Madrid lose to Atlético for the first time in 187 years then the Catalan club will be league champions with five games to spare. Hooray! (If you are a Barça fan).

Standing in their way, though, it’s the mighty Athletic who are running out of time in their search for one decent result in a washed-up season. The Bilbao club have been paying attention to the week’s football news though – specifically the treatment dished out by a certain German club to the Catalans, and they’ll be looking to do the same on Saturday. “I hope we can copy a bit of what Bayern Munich did in the Champions League,” said Carlos Gurpegui. "We’ll play an intense game and be close to the Barça players, and win the ball off them.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Atlético Madrid (3rd) v Real Madrid (2nd) - 20.00
Here we go again: Atlético Madrid’s best, best chance of beating Real Madrid in a derby since the last best, best chance. This could go one of two ways. A wounded Real Madrid looking for a restoration of pride go out and grab all three points against Atlético Madrid, as per tradition around these parts. Or a resting-everyone, reserving-resources-for-Tuesday Real Madrid go out and grab all three points against Atlético Madrid, as per tradition around these parts.

Diego Simeone is hinting that a crazy third option may be on the cards - a victory to Atlético Madrid in the Vicente Calderón for the first time since 1999, when Abba dominated the charts and there was just the one car between a whole town. “We have an opportunity,” on Saturday confirmed the Atlético boss. “I repeat, an opportunity.” An opportunity to do what will remain a mystery until nearly 10pm on Saturday night.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Real Zaragoza (20th) v Mallorca (18th) - 22.00
Zaragoza may have lost again on Monday, which makes it 15 games without a victory, but Manolo Jiménez is still in charge. This doesn’t signal a change of approach from trigger-happy club president Agapito Iglesias, but the simple economic fact that Jiménez would be a little pricey to fire having signed a three-season deal last summer. Goalkeeper Roberto Jiménez has noticed that the team are in all sorts of trouble and that “we are not doing well, the things that the boss tells us to do. The change needs to be radical and immediate. It’s all in the head.”

Talking nonsense on behalf of Mallorca is Javier Arizmendi, a former Zaragoza player, who claimed that Saturday’s relegation sizzler is “one more final but losing it is not definitive because mathematically we’ll still be alive.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

SUNDAY

Espanyol (10th) v Granada (17th) - 12.00
Well, there really is no stopping the mighty Espanyol, a team who were bottom at the end of November when Javier Aguirre took over but have now picked up 43 points. But the Pericos want more. They want Europe, which is currently five points away if Málaga remain excluded from next season's continental jamborees. “We have refocused our objective,” announced Diego Colotto.

Granada just want three points in the bag, something they haven't managed in the nine matches. However, a sparkling performance in a 1-1 draw with Valladolid last week, which was preceded by a retreat in Marbella, has seen a repeat of the same training trick. And after a few hours spent in a Costa del Sol classroom, defender Guilherme Siqueira has grasped the dynamics of football: “The conclusion from the camp was that the team is the 11 who play and the three who take part in the second halves.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (6th) v Getafe (9th) - 17.00
Marca reports that the Málaga footballers are going unpaid again, but that hasn’t stopped the club’s owner raging against the machines of UEFA and the Spanish FA, rather than hitting a ‘send’ button on a bank transfer. The paper says that the club’s captains had a tough-talking meeting with some institution bigwigs to find out what was going on in terms of “money, bonuses, salaries and delays.”

But enough of such trivialities and onto the thoughts of Sheikh Al-Thani. “My question to the Spanish Football Federation. Where is the justice and equality between the clubs? We were wronged by the UEFA. Where are you about this injustice to Malaga and the moral and psychological damage and the physical?” Hopefully, there will be more comedy stylings next week.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Valladolid (13th) v Sevilla (11th) - 19.00
Need three points to reach the magic 42 mark? Then simply call for Sevilla, who have just the one away win from 16 in la Liga this season. However, this somewhat lackadaisical record has nothing to do with the Andalusians being consistently hopeless, but dastardly referees. That’s the opinion of Sevilla coach Unai Emery, who feels that his side are being punished for not complaining about referees enough.

Feeling hard done by due to the diving antics of Diego Costa in last week’s defeat to Atlético Madrid and a handball in the lead-up to the goal, Emery wrote that “We feel powerless, because we can say what we want, but the points will never be returned to us." He's right.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Real Sociedad (4th) v Valencia (5th) - 21.00
In a new tradition, the blog will let you all know who is charge of Valencia on a week to week basis, as things are fairly fluid in the Mestalla boardroom these days. Technically Vicente Andreu is supposed to be in charge, due to the resignation of the previous temporary president, who was only president due to the resignation of the previous previous president Manuel Llorente.

However, Llorente was seen on Thursday at Valencia’s training ground visiting the players and chatting away with manager Ernesto Valverde, perhaps forgetting that he had quit his post a few weeks ago. Valverde must be quite confused this week, as he has also had a visit from Amadeo Salvo, the vice-president of the foundation which sort of owns the club, to discuss the contract situation with the coach.
LLL Prediction - Home win

MONDAY

Betis (7th) v Deportivo (16th) - 22.00
Another Monday match stuck away late at night, but it’s a belter that sees Deportivo continuing their incredible journey to escape relegation. Four wins and a draw have put Depor onto 30 points – two above the drop zone – and next up they face a tasty Betis side. “It’s a big peloton to escape,” noted Deportivo boss Fernando Vázquez, who rather admirably is training to complete a triathlon. “Let’s see who’s the best sprinter.”

History is on Depor’s side on Monday, with just the single defeat in the last 10 visits to Betis, something else to buoy Galician spirits. “Depending on ourselves is something we’ve dreamed about for some time,” revealed Deportivo midfielder Álex Bergantiños. “Taking into account where we’ve come from, we are in a very good situation.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barça lick wounds and hope for schadenfreude as Madrid face Dortmund

2013-04-24T12:04:00Z

Barcelona's battering by Bayern could only have been predicted by the King Egg-Head of experts, the most perspicacious of pundits, the elite of analysts. Like La Liga Loca’s local fishmonger.

When asked yesterday by the blog, the hake-hawker boldly went for a 4-0 home win – a prognosis that duly went into the semi-final preview and duly it came to pass. “A logical conclusion,” said the Salmon-Master coolly, when asked the following morning about his inspiration.

The manner of the defeat was devastating for Barcelona. It wasn’t a fluky loss against a side playing to its strengths, such as last year’s semi-final set-back against Chelsea. Barça weren’t under par against clinical opponents who took their chances, as in as this season’s struggle against Milan.

Bayern give Barça a haddock. Sorry

No, this was a thrashing of the highest order. It was the moment from 2001: A Space Odyssey when apes evolve to such an extent that they learn how much fun there is to be had in whacking their more innocent comrades with bones.

“They were faster, stronger and played better,” admitted Gerard Piqué about a Bayern Munich team who have apparently taken the next evolutionary step. “Practically impossible, but we are going to try,” said a downbeat Xavi Hernández on the chances of a turnaround next week in the Camp Nou.

NEWS, Wed 24 Apr: Barcelona offer little hope of a reaction

The mood in the Catalan capital newspapers is equally sombre, with Sport calling the 4-0 defeat “the saddest night.” “No excuses, they were superior,” wrote Josep Maria Casanovas. “Physically, there was an enormous difference: they are stronger, faster and have more depth. We are not used to these types of defeats and it’s left us wounded.”

Mundo Deportivo's cover screams “Nightmare!” with the paper’s director Santi Nolla rolling with his Spanish football instincts and hinting at a conspiracy. “Yesterday Barça suffered against a superior Bayern and also a referee who was wrong for three of the four goals for the Germans. UEFA are tired of the power of Barça and want a change, but on Tuesday Bayern won, not UEFA.”

With pretty much all hope lost, there’s only one thing that can give Barça a tiny sliver of comfort: the hope of a similar fate befalling Real Madrid in their test at Borussia Dortmund. The omens lean in that direction, with the Spanish side having only won once in Germany in 23 matches. What’s more, in both group games Real Madrid were quite outplayed by Dortmund, picking up just one point from six. And it was a lucky point at that.

NEWS, Wed 24 Oct: Dortmund outclass Real Madrid to top group

Jose Mourinho tried putting the pressure on Jürgen Klopp as early as Friday, noting that the Dortmund coach had been talking about the game every day since the draw was made. After a typically cheerful and self-effacing response from the German manager, Mourinho may have realised that the usual niggling and nagging towards the opposition camp wasn’t going to work this time.

"Bring it, bi-atch"

Instead, the Portuguese gave all four sides an equal chance of winning the Champions League this season – but felt that his footballers deserve the prize the most. “I’d really like football to do justice with these players. Two years ago we were knocked out in an unfair way and last season it was penalties. This team deserves to win a Champions League.”

The fantastic news for Real Madrid fans is that LLL's local fishmonger says they will take a big step towards that goal with a 2-1 win in Dortmund.

In Cod We Trust.

Public opinion split as Barça prepare to face Bayern in unusually unpredictable encounter

2013-04-23T09:41:00Z

La Liga Loca should probably be knocking out an article a good thousand words long, stuffed to the brim with tactical analysis, historical precedents and maybe the odd graph to try and predict how Barcelona will fare in Munich on Tuesday night. To be frank, that sounded like far too much hard work, and pretty much beyond the capabilities of this modest scribe.

Instead, LLL did detailed early morning research by chatting to punters in the local café and fruit market to catch a glimpse of the immediate future of football. Things got off to a bad start with the Atlético Madrid-supporting owner, when a semi-humourous suggestion his side would lose to Real Madrid on Saturday no matter what happened during the week, was met with a stern Paddington Bear look and nothing else. Fortunately, the coffee and toast had already been delivered to the table.

The gentleman who seems to be very successful at sports betting announced that Barcelona would draw or win against Bayern. A Barça supporter buying bananas felt the evening was going to go “very badly” for the Catalan club, while the Madridista fishmonger who never seems to sell any stinky fish predicted with some glee that Bayern Munich would win 4-0. The Rojiblanco fruit seller wouldn’t be drawn on the game, other than musing that it would be “difficult”, while lovingly fondling some plums. However, he did cheerfully predicted another defeat for his side in Saturday’s derby at the Vicente Calderón.

There seem to be mixed feelings in the Catalan capital, too, although there’s bravado to cover this up, with the front cover of Sport blasting “No fear and on the attack!” Inside the paper, Josep Maria Casanovas has gone back to the 1960s, Mad Men-style, with his hard-hitting editorial suggesting Tuesday’s game is for “real men, a clash between two high speed trains. Talent against physical power. Pride against ambition.”

"Whatever you do, don't mention Pep..."

There was also the warning that “it is forbidden to doubt a Barça side that has reached six semi-finals in a row”. The punishment for habouring such feelings was not mentioned, but it’s probably having to listen to the club’s anthem on a loop for five hours straight.

Mundo Deportivo are a little more laid back, and have a smiling Leo Messi on the front cover, a sign of both papers being certain that if the little Argentinean isn’t in form, it’s going to be a sticky battle in Bavaria. “Winning will not be easy,” writes Santi Nola in the paper, “for the first time in the past five years Barça will not be the media favourite in a match.”

The build-up to the match has seen German journos wind up Bayern Munich boss, Jupp Heynckes with continuing questions around whether the outgoing boss has been seeking advice from the incoming Pep Guardiola. “I know Barça as well as my own team,” fumed the exasperated German. “This felt disrespectful to Pep in his own relationship with Barça,” announced Heynckes on why the topic should never be brought up again.

Besides, it seems being disrespectful to Guardiola is the job reserved for Barcelona themselves, with the club’s mouthy spokesman Toni Freixa boasting on Friday that “Tito Vilanova is winning all comparisons with Guardiola, including as a person.” Miaow.

As a tiny bit of analysis is required in these circumstances, if Barça play at their very best, the tie can be wrapped up in Munich. 62% to 87% performance levels will see Barça coming back to the Camp Nou as favourites over all. Anything less would see a lot of hard work to be done next Wednesday in the Catalan capital. To be fair, which of these scenarios will unfold is anyone’s guess. Even if they are flogging fruit or fish.

Özil impresses again in Madrid win, Malaga suffer Mestalla mauling

2013-04-22T08:52:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's man in Spain, Tim Stannard, runs the rule over the weekend's Primera action...

Good Day

Eric Abidal
The French defender played the full 90 minutes against Levante, continuing a comeback for that is, in the truest sense of the word, heroic.

Mesut Özil
There are no eyebrows to speak of beneath the German’s forehead, which is a little disconcerting, but Mesut Özil is a very amiable fella, and also a player who has scored braces in two consecutive home games for Real Madrid. “He’s up there with Ronaldo and Messi,” purred Betis boss, Pepe Mel. “When he scores more goals, he’ll get the praise he deserves.”

Atlético Madrid
There was more than a smidgen of handball in the build-up to Atlético’s goal in their 1-0 win at Sevilla, but it was double delight for the Champions League-chasing side, who took advantage of Real Sociedad dropping two points to increase the lead between third and fourth to 11 with 18 to play for. That could be useful with the traditional hapless loss to Real Madrid just around the corner.

Valencia
Well, that was quite mad. The blog thought Valencia would sneak Saturday evening's match against Malaga by the odd goal. But that theory was swiftly proven to be completely incorrect when the Mestalla club scored four goals in six minutes, something Los Che had never managed before. It’s even more incredible an act when you consider that Roberto Soldado is in the forward line and would normally fluff both of the two chances he managed to score.

Piti
La Liga Loca must admit it had suspected Rayo’s attention may not have been fully focussed on Friday evening's trip to Mallorca. However, manager Paco Jémez publicly warned his players that he was expecting their best performance of the season, and he was rewarded with a fine showing in a 1-1 draw. A party piece from Piti opened the scoring as the Vallecas side avoided Paco’s big stick. “The team played the game I wanted,” announced the Rayo boss after the weekend's opening match.

Verdú
The Espanyol playmaker is out of contract in June, and the number of clubs keen on signing the 29-year-old may have increased when he opened the scoring in the Pericos 2-0 win at Getafe. It was his eighth strike of the season and helped put Espanyol on 43 points - mission pretty much accomplished in the survival stakes.

Deportivo & Athletic Bilbao
Depor boss Fernando Vazquez reckons 38 points could be enough to stay up, with a lot of clubs in the relegation scrap playing each other in final six games. Sunday's draw in la Coruña brought Deportivo within three victories of that target and left a still spooked Athletic just one win away.

Fernando Llorente
Getting a few minutes on the pitch would normally constitute a good day for the Athletic Bilbao striker these days, but the Pamplona-born forward managed to start and score a goal to boot. Happy days are here again.

Granada
Cliché time: If the Andalusian side play like they did in the home draw against Valladolid, then they will have no trouble staying up. Granada had 27 shots - nine on target - and only some ridiculously good keeping from Jaime in the Valladolid goal prevented a Granada win. “He was like Spiderman,” said a frustrated Granada coach, Lucas Alcaraz, after the clash. “What he did was extraordinary,” agreed opposing boss, Miroslav Djukic.

Osasuna & Real Sociedad
It may have been a complete stalemate in Pamplona but there were positives for both teams in Sunday's 0-0 draw. Osasuna stopped a run of leakiness and Real Sociedad continued to prove that the side can be tough cookies, dig in and grind out points when required.

Bad Day

Barcelona & Real Madrid
Why not stick ‘em both in the Bad Day section, just to be contrary? Two victories for the Big Two, but two completely pointless football matches, aside from some spirited opposition from Levante and Betis. The title race could be properly over - although it fell into a deep, deep, sleep in December - next week if Real Madrid lose at Atlético, and Barcelona defeat Athletic Bilbao in San Mamés.

Diego Costa
The legend continues. The antagonistic Atlético Madrid forward once again put himself about a bit in the clash at Sevilla, continuing to earn friends in the Sánchez Pizjuán. The performance included a yellow card that is set to put the Brazilian out of next week’s derby, and a pathetic attempt at feigning a headbutt from Cala. “He spent the whole game provoking,” complained Unai Emery. “The referees need to control this.”

Málaga
‘Inexplicable’ was the vibe from Manuel Pellegrini after the 5-1 loss to Valencia which topped off a tempestuous weekend for the side, after the Chilean boss slammed - tabloid style - the Málaga owners for the lack of direction for the side. “The club should be working for the next season,” complained Pellegrini on Friday. “It’s an uncomfortable situation of uncertainty, with a lot of players finishing their contracts. The future of the club needs to be more about deeds than words.”

Sheikh Al Thani
The Málaga president is still in the running for the blog’s hastily created ‘Leader of the Year’ award. The Qatari owner topped his recent Tweet-rant against 'racist' UEFA following his side's Champions League exit by condemning his footballers for playing “without heart” on Saturday. All very quiet though, when the same footballers were playing without wages.

Leo Baptistao
If all the transfer gossip over a move to Atlético Madrid over the summer is true, the Rayo forward has probably played his last match for the Vallecas side after breaking his collarbone during Friday’s Mallorca draw.

Getafe
For the second year in a row, Getafe boss Luis García is apparently having problems convincing his footballers to push on for more, having reached the safety point. After a run of four wins from five, Getafe have managed just 2 points from 12 and suffered a 2-0 home defeat to Espanyol on Sunday. The Coliseum club had two players sent off to add to the soft red card for Alexis last week, which saw any comeback as impossible. “Strange things at the end of the season, the Alexis sending off, injuries...”

Mallorca
“At least we got a point,” was the only positive the Mallorca boss could take from the home draw with Rayo, a match that the Balearic side really had to win to stay in la Primera. Next week’s clash with Zaragoza is now more than a ‘final’, it’s a “super-match” claimed Manzano, upping the stakes even further.

Betis boss Pepe Mel aims to keep middle fingers under control during Bernabeu clash

2013-04-19T08:39:00Z

Pepe Mel - bird flipper

Friday

Mallorca (19th) v Rayo Vallecano (9th) - 21.00
While La Liga Loca is not suggesting Mallorca prove they are ‘4 Real’ in their battle for survival in the style of Manic Street Preacher Richie Edwards (a method involving a craft knife and some stitches), the Balearic club are going to have to up their game a little from Monday. Tis true that Mallorca came away 1-0 winners against Celta Vigo, but there were some hairy moments along the way before an injury time pounce from Giovani dos Santos gave Mallorca the points. “Winning costs the world and sometimes, a miracle,” gasped coach, Gregorio Manzano, after the clash.
Rayo Vallecano are the visitors on Friday night and are another team with a point to prove. LLL suspects the Madrid outfit may not be all that keen on a tilt at European qualification, quite reasonably given regular midweek matches would be a huge strain on resources. Friday night will help decide which team is all talk and no trouser on their season’s true desires.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Saturday

Granada (19th) v Valladolid (13th) - 16.00
Andalusian bottom-dwellars Granada decided to try and save their season by setting off for a three-day retreat in Marbella. Normally that would be a disastrous ideas with footballers, but in Granada’s case it’s a Hail Mary approach that might stop the lamentable run of results which has left the side with just two points from the past 24 available.
“The idea is to try news things to lift our spirits, generate self confidence and prepare the best way possible for the Valladolid match,” revealed Granada boss Lucas Alcaraz.
Club captain, Manuel Lucena, announced that “the base of the success of the past few years has been the unity between all parts of the club and I’m convinced that salvation will come through this union.” Funny, LLL always thought that the base of Granada’s success of the past few years has been having the same owners as Udinese and being able to borrow all the Serie A club’s players...
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (2nd) v Real Betis (7th) - 18.00
It's been a busy week for Betis manager Pepe Mel, who has had a Seville city derby and the visit to the Santiago Bernabéu to contend with in the space of a few days. So no time to put the finishing touches to a follow-up to his book ‘The Liar’, a mystery novel that was a complete work of fiction and nothing to do with any former club owners he's worked under. Mel has been busy enough just dealing with the fall-out following the middle finger he flipped - supposedly at an unnamed third party and not opposition fans - towards the end of last Friday’s 3-3 draw with Sevilla. “I’m very, very disappointed and angry at myself for what I did. People who know me know it’s nothing to do with who I am as a person or my way of understanding this game,” he told Marca.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Levante (12th) - 20.00
Things seem to be a little odd at Levante. The side has been struggling for goals since the departure of Obafemi Martins to MLS, and the 4-0 home defeat to Deportivo last weekend seemed worryingly easily for their Galician visitors. There’s still no word on the renewal of the contract of manager Juan Ignacio Martínez, who has a frosty relationship with the big cheeses of Levante. This sees Marca speculating that the Valencia club may be scouting for a replacement for JIM and are quite keen on current Elche boss, Fran Escribá.
Any offer that might come through could see a tough decision for the Valencia-born coach, as Elche are currently top of la Segunda with a 13 point lead over third. However Elche is an institutional basket case, as with 93% of all clubs in la Liga, so a more established side might be a nice change of scene for the former Getafe and Valencia number two.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia (6th) v Málaga (5th) - 22.00
So, a bit of a big game then between two Champions League-chasing sides, who are also both currently something of a shambles off the pitch. Last week, LLL explained that Federico Varona, President of the Valencia Foundation - who sort of own the club - was temporarily stepping in after the resignation of Manuel Llorente as president of Valencia. Scrap that. Varona stepped down after 13 days in charge citing in a written communication the pressure of the role due to “personal insults and abuse.”
Who’s in charge now in Mestalla is any one’s guess. Roberto Soldado certainly doesn’t know, but that's no surprise, as it’s unlikely the forward knew who was in charge before. “We don’t know what the future is, it’s all in the air and it’s tough to isolate yourself from all the talk,” complained the Valencia striker.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Getafe (8th) v Espanyol (11th) - 12.00
Bad Alexis. Bad. Bad. Bad! The Getafe man got himself sent off in the defeat to Valladolid last week, and although his initial offence was a tad soft, he made things much worse. As he ambled off towards the tunnel, the defender spat into the crowd, who were giving the former Valencia man a bit of stick. Alexis released an apology on Getafe’s website - “it’s not the attitude a sportsperson should have” wrote the stopper, but the FA’s Competition Committee have suspended the defender for four games for insulting the referee and for his saliva-escape.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Deportivo (16th) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) - 17.00
Now, if there’s one team in la Primera who are supposed to be all with the stiff upper lip and not panicking and blathering on about ‘finals’, it’s Athletic Bilbao. But the Basque side seem to have completely lost their nerve and are genuinely spooked about starting life in the new San Mamés down in la Segunda. “If the Granada match was the game of the year,” shirked Ander Herrera referring to comments made two weeks ago, “in La Coruña we have a match of the century.”
There’s at least one member of the Bilbao who has a backbone, and that’s defender, Jonás Ramalho. The 20-year-old enjoyed himself immensely booting Cristiano Ronaldo around the pitch last Sunday, before losing the Portuguese at a free kick to produce the Real Madrid man’s second goal. “I’m tough on the ball no matter who the player is,” claimed Ramalho.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Osasuna (15th) v Real Sociedad (4th) - 19.00
This match presents a tough Kramer vs Kramer moment for LLL, with the blog rooting both for Osasuna to stay up and also for Real Sociedad to finish forth. Hopefully Valencia and Málaga can drag out a stalemate to allow Osasuna to sneak three points in Pamplona. There certainly won’t be a shortage of fans at the game, with the final 2,000 tickets made available for Sunday’s match selling out in three hours, as supporters queued from as early as five in the morning.
The Osasuna president, Miguel Archanco, has been lamenting how his club have ended up in this sticky position towards the end of the season, commenting that “we had a really nice advantage and we lost it.” Nevertheless, twas ever the case for the club says Archanco. “The fans know the Champions League for Osasuna is staying up.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sevilla (10th) v Atlético Madrid (3rd) - 19.00
LLL was a little surprised to see unsettling stories about Sevilla players moving to Real Madrid suddenly in the papers, given the Santiago Bernabéu club have already played the Andalusians twice this season. But the name of Geoffrey Kondogbia has appeared in both Marca and AS as being a Real Madrid target as a long term replacement for Xabi Alonso, despite the 20-year-old Frenchman being nothing like the former Liverpool midfielder.
But hey ho, due to the player being part owned by a third party in a deal LLL is too thick to understand, the Sevilla player could be bought for €8m. Sevilla may also lose Kondogbia’s midfield partner Gary Medel, with the club reportedly having grown tired of the player’s somewhat spotty disciplinary record. “He finds it hard to stay calm,” noted teammate Albert Botía on Medel’s sending off in the Seville derby last Friday.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Celta Vigo (20th) v Zaragoza (18th) - 22.00
Celta, who have been cursed with two Monday night games in a row, have been grumbling all week about a couple of penalties they feel should have been awarded to them in the defeat to Mallorca. And that’s all because Celta don’t complain about refereeing decisions, says Roberto Iago. “It seems like we are idiots because we always stay quiet, don’t say anything and that’s it.” Iago’s theory that referees enjoy picking on teams who don’t fight back was backed up by club captain, Borja Oubiña.
“It wasn’t just two penalties, but fouls and a lot of another stuff,” complained the midfielder who also attempted some rousing Braveheart talk for the team at the bottom of the table. “A lot of people have us for going down, but there are still games left.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

La Liga’s Relegation Rumble: The runners and riders

2013-04-17T10:19:00Z

While Athletic Bilbao, Valladolid and Levante peer nervously down at the relegation fight, all three just need to be barely competent from this point onwards to avoid the trap door. The six teams listed below, in contrast, need their performances in the final seven games to range from "very good" to "uncharacteristically world-class".

Like a lingering camera shot from a Michael Bay flick, we start from the bottom upwards....

20th Celta Vigo 24pts
The Galicians were once the People’s Princess of Primera clubs. Everyone from Seville to Santander wished good things upon the side who had been out of the top flight for five seasons. Plucky Celta played pretty football but couldn’t get the results, which only made the fishy-whiffed ones even more lovable.

At this point, club president Carlos Mouriño really managed to stuff things up for Celta. Paco Herrera was sacked in February despite the former Liverpool trainer taking the club up to la Primera and having supposed unconditional support from his boss. He was replaced by Abel Resino, a manager as amiable and cuddly as Donald Rumsfeld with shinsplints.

It didn't help, and from then on nor did the Celta players. A disastrous defeat to Deportivo saw top scorer Iago Aspas suspended for four matches for head-butting Carlos Marchena. Injured Hugo Mallo was seen in the stands taunting opposition supporters, to leave a squabbling squad having lost public sympathy. Monday’s late defeat to Mallorca now leaves Celta with just a single victory in 13 and four from safety.

19th Mallorca 27pts
Giovani dos Santos has given Mallorca hope that a survival bid could be successful with an injury-time winner against Celta Vigo, showing once again that the Mexican is the club’s Obi-Wan Kenobi only hope.

"Giovani is for Mallorca what Cristiano is for Real Madrid,” opined manager Gregorio Manzano. The problem there is whilst Ronaldo is the ultimate professional and inhumanly consistent, Giovani dos Santos is, well, Giovani dos Santos – potentially excellent but as reliable as a chocolate nuclear reactor.

One advantage Mallorca have is that their run-in includes three teams who might be utterly unmotivated in mid-table: Rayo, Levante and Valladolid. The really big niggling problem is that Mallorca aren’t very good, which puts the players at a bit of disadvantage when three clubs are slipping into la Segunda.

18th Zaragoza 27pts
Oh dear. Victory-free in 2013, Zaragoza are about to equal the club’s longest winless run, which dates back to the era of Vera Lynn. However, the side lead by Manolo Jiménez has been in similar circumstances before. Last year, in fact, when all looked lost before they pulled off five wins from six in the final matches of the season.

That skin-saving run was completed with a victory over Getafe, witnessed in person by LLL. The opposition looked strangely unmotivated but also rather careless in going down to nine men, which certainly didn't hinder Zaragoza. The next two games at Celta and home to Mallorca will be against rivals who are a little more up for it, and this could cost Zaragoza a Primera place after four years of struggle.

17th Granada 28pts
It doesn’t say a great deal about the quality of sides at the bottom that Granada aren’t rock bottom. Indeed, the Andalusians have only spent three rounds in the drop zone, which is quite remarkable considering they have almost nothing going for them.

Just two points have been picked up from the past 24 and the club are still living off February's fluked victory over Real Madrid, which had everyone thinking that newly-arrived coach Lucas Alcaraz could keep Granada up.

That might still be possible, though, as the southerners are outrageously lucky and appear to be able to dig out results when required. There are two very winnable matches in the run-in, the first against Valladolid this weekend, and the last against Getafe. However, there are some real toughies in between.

16th Deportivo 29pts
LLL was trying to argue the other day that Deportivo had too many points for this stage of the season and that three wins in a row had damaged the chances of the club’s survival. Nonsense, of course, but the vague, half-formed notion behind the claim was that Deportivo really need to beware the feeling that the job has been done now that the club is off the bottom and out of the relegation zone. After all, looking down is scarier than looking up. Unless a piano or an anvil is about to fall on your head.

The Galicians will probably need four more wins but most of their final seven games are against clubs who also have a lot at stake. Athletic Bilbao, Betis, Atlético Madrid, Málaga and Real Sociedad are going to be quite the challenge for the squad, who have been through the wringer this season.

15th Osasuna 31pts
LLL really could take or leave Mallorca or Granada going down, but would be genuinely upset to see the departure of Osasuna after over a decade of fun-filled Primera action. But the blog feels that everything will be OK again in Pamplona, as Osasuna have a trick of flooring the accelerator when required and are capable of putting together a string of results. Three wins and a cheeky draw will be needed and Getafe, Granada and Sevilla are on the horizon to provide at least part of those needs.

LLL prediction: Celta, Mallorca and Deportivo to drop.

Barça resort to 'Plan T', Ronaldo gets battered, Sevilla throw it away

2013-04-15T11:30:00Z

Good Day

Cristian Tello and Thiago Alcántara
Monday's Sport saw Barça's 3-0 win at Zaragoza as the club's 'Plan T', with the starting line-up not featuring Leo Messi, Gerard Piqué, Sergio Busquets, Pedro or David Villa. While the performances from the winger have been impressive for much of the season, it's only in the past couple of weeks that the playmaker has started to deliver. Thiago opened the scoring after 20 minutes in La Romareda and Tello banged in a brace to keep Barcelona 13 points clear at the top of the table. "There is a future," purred Josep Maria Casanovas in Sport on Sunday's dynamic duo.

Cristiano Ronaldo
The big debate at the Santiago Bernabéu: are Real Madrid 'Ronaldo-dependent' or is the Madrid forward just very, very good and always likely to score more than everyone else, irrespective of the who plays alongside him? The comfortable 3-0 win in San Mamés against Athletic continued Madrid's remarkably good run of form in Bilbao, with seven la Liga victories in the past eight games. In fact, this was the third 3-0 victory in a row.
Ronaldo would have enjoyed much of this encounter too. The Madrid man was on the receiving end of a bit of a battering from Athletic, but responded with a good old moan at the referee and a couple of goals. The Portuguese looked quite chuffed as he left the pitch, despite being substituted, with things getting just a little bit too fruity for a footballer who should have been smothered in bubble wrap with the Champions League in mind.

Falcao
After a few wobbles and no-shows in recent matches, both Atlético Madrid and Falcao needed that 5-0 dolloping of Granada in a stuffed, sunny Vicente Calderón. With the club focussing on a promotion which saw the team’s youngest fans encouraged to enjoy a bit of football, there was much talk of “child’s play” in the Madrid press on Monday morning after the victory.

Imanol Agirretxe
Unbelievable, Brian. Real Sociedad just keep on going and going and going and going. Sunday’s 2-0 victory at Rayo Vallecano, thanks to a brace from Agirretxe, continued a run of 12 matches unbeaten for the Basque side, who have suffered just a single defeat in 20 matches. “There are seven games left and we know it is going to be difficult, but if we keep going forward with the same mentality, we can do it,” said a chirpy Real Sociedad boss, Philippe Montanier, after the match.

Julio Baptista
A 1-0 win over Osasuna thanks to a strike from Julio Baptista in the final seconds of the game was a performance that took stones from Málaga, after the disappointment of Tuesday night. The Osasuna-shaped opponents were under the cosh for much of the match, but Málaga kept their peckers up right to the end and were rewarded with a result that keeps the side in fifth.

Betis & Sevilla
Friday’s Seville derby was as mad as a bag of puppies, but both sides get into the Good Day section despite moments that had both managers crying ‘noooooooooooooo’ while suffering flashbacks as they awoke the following morning.
Betis contrived to see themselves 3-0 down within 32 minutes, before pulling the scoreline back to 3-3. Sevilla contrived to flush two points down the loo despite being 3-0 up after 32 minutes. Pepe Mel gave the middle finger to an unknown entity in the crowd; “you know who it was to, as much as I do,” hinted the Betis boss. Meanwhile, opposite number Unai Emery aged 20 years in 90 minutes; “it feels like a defeat,” he uttered, gloomily.
With all the Andalusian dust now settled, an analysis suggests that the point still keeps Betis trundling along in European qualification contention and sees the side with a big distraction out of the way, but Sevilla continue with a poor record away from home that has produced just the single victory from 16 games.

Ivan Rakitic
Aside from Friday’s result, it wasn't a bad week for Sevilla’s Croatian midfielder, who got married and then knocked in two goals in 20 minutes in the city derby.

Espanyol
A second 3-3 of the weekend and yet more beautiful madness on Saturday night in Cornella. Javier Aguirre’s side looked beaten when Soldado gave Valencia the lead in the 91st minute, only for Sergio García to pop up with an equaliser in the dying moments of a stonking match. “It was Sergio’s, but the whole stadium created it,” declared the side’s Mexican manager, who has now pulled out five wins and four draws at home to put the Pericos just one more victory from virtual safety for the season.

Valladolid
Valladolid scrapped to a 2-1 win over Getafe in a fixture between two teams who seem to go about their business without anyone really noticing. For Valladolid coach Miroslav Djukic though, the victory was “the most important of the season”, with the result arriving after three straight defeats, a string of results that threatened to put the club in the group marked ‘could still get sucked into the relegation battle’.

Deportivo
La Liga Loca suspects it might just write “they couldn’t, could they?” for the Deportivo update every week, to save the blog a precious bit of time. The 4-0 win at Levante was the fourth straight win for the Galicians and by far the easiest of the victories and lifted the team out of the relegation zone for the first time since the end of November.

Bad Day

Valencia
Two points were won in the last few seconds of last week’s clash with Valladolid due to an incorrectly taken throw-in. But the swings and roundabouts principle of football came back to bite the Mestalla side on the backside after Sergio García’s late, late, late equaliser ruled out what looked like being a late, late winning effort from Roberto Soldado. “We only had to defend a couple more balls,” lamented Valencia boss Ernesto Valverde, after a result that sees the east coast club losing ground on fourth-placed Real Sociedad.

Cañas
The Betis midfielder managed to get the eternally red card-able Gary Medel sent off after suffering massive bruising and cranial trauma from a horrendous very light touch to the face from the Sevilla midfielder during the squabble. LLL’s thoughts are with the enormous girl’s blouse in the footballer’s recovery.

Getafe
A first defeat in eight for Getafe with both of the two goals conceded to Valladolid being quite avoidable complained Luis García. “We studied the play for Oscar’s goal at least 15 times in the morning,” revealed the Getafe boss in what sounds like a thrilling breakfast.

Juan Ignacio Martínez
Strangely subdued stuff from Levante in the 4-0 home defeat to Deportivo, with some supporters booing the side - a little harsh - and manager, Juan Ignacio Martínez, grumbling that “perhaps I confused them with mixed messages to the group. It was the worst match I’ve seen, since I’ve been here.”

Fernando Llorente
Just the third league start of the season for the Basque striker and it showed with a former great being a peripheral figure in the defeat to Real Madrid. You know things are working for you as a forward man when you are losing a battle with Raúl Albiol.

Osasuna
Five defeats from six, with the most recent being at Málaga, puts Osasuna back into the relegation frame. “We’re feeling torn about by the manner of the defeat,” admitted Osasuna boss, José Luis Mendilibar, after Saturday’s late match.

Zaragoza
Each week, the message from the Zaragoza camp is that the players are focussed and ready to respond to the crisis the club finds itself in after a 2013 that has yet to produce a victory. Sunday's visit of Barcelona was always going to be a tough ask for Zaragoza, no matter the first teamers rested by the Catalan club but Manolo Jiménez complained that his team didn't really make matters any easier for themselves. "We were inferior from the first minute," complained the Zaragoza boss, whose side slipped into the relegation zone. "I won't be letting anyone give up."

Iker’s Arsenal link, Betis think big and a Mestalla mess (again)

2013-04-12T11:15:00Z

FRIDAY

Betis (7th) v Sevilla (10th) - 22.00 (CEST)
Readers with mid- to long-term memory will recall that Sevilla pummeled Betis 5-1 in the derby earlier this season. But while the side now lead by Unai Emery went on to do absolutely nothing of note this season except be ludicrously limp and lifeless, a brilliant Betis charged on to put themselves in the hunt for a Champions League place.

That golden goal seems to be the big picture for Betis ahead of Friday’s match, with coach Pepe Mel reminding fans that “our objective is to end up in Europe, not beat Sevilla.” “We would all sign off on a 1-0,” says Mel, “we don’t have to win by five.” Defender Antonio Amaya agrees, chuckling that “I’d take a 1-0 last-minute win with a dodgy penalty.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

SATURDAY

Valladolid (14th ) v Getafe (8th) - 16.00
Valladolid president Carlos Suárez said that appealing wouldn’t really get anywhere and he was right. The team were unhappy that a throw-in awarded to them in the final seconds of last weekend’s game at Valencia was taken by the home side, without the referee’s intervention, in a move that lead to a late winning goal. The Competition Committee’s response was that there was no way to retroactively deal with the decision or replay the game with the scores at 1-1. However, in a tiny victory, it did admit that the referee made a mistake in the action.

Unsurprisingly, fiery Valladolid coach Miroslav Djukic didn't take the news at all well, advising that he would never support an FA ‘Fair Play’ campaign or sport a T-shirt with the logo. “There’s no Fair Play,” ranted the Serbian, “everything looks ‘bleeping’ great on the shirt but you have to apply it.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Levante (11th) v Deportivo (18th) - 18.00
The Mighty Depor have given themselves a chance of survival by beating three relegation rivals in a row: Celta Vigo, Mallorca and Zaragoza. But now the Galicians are facing a grown-up, grizzled opponent in Levante, who are looking for one more triumph to reach 43 points and the mythical ‘virtual’ safety point. But even getting into this position with eight matches left has been quite the achievement for Deportivo and the side’s coach Fernando Vázquez, a figure praised to the heavens by midfielder Juan Carlos Valerón.

“He’s like a mad man. He’s been years away from coaching, what’s more he always wanted to manage Deportivo, and you can tell,” enthused Valerón about the former English teacher who hopes to stay on for more years at the club “whether they are in la Primera or la Segunda.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Espanyol (12th) v Valencia (5th) - 20.00
What a huge mess. That’s pretty much the state of Valencia’s baffling institutional affairs these days. Technically speaking (LLL thinks but can’t be entirely sure, not being a lawyer) the club is in the hands of the local council and the ‘Foundation’, which represents the shareholders of this most messed-up of institutions. Late last week, after four years in charge, Manuel Llorente resigned as president of the club feeling that everything was getting a bit too much for him and that a new leader was needed for the Mestalla mad-house.

“After listening to the new president of the Foundation, I understood a new era was beginning,” said Llorente. That new president, Federico Varona, says that getting Ernesto Valverde to stay on for next season is the immediate priority along with working out who’s actually in charge, what to do with the €400m or so debt, the half-built stadium, the unpopular choice of biscuits in the staff canteen...
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (6th) v Osasuna (15th) - 22.00
LLL would need to be Norris McWhirter to know what the biggest book in the world was. However, Geoff Capes – whom the blog assumes is still the world’s strongest man – will be needed by UEFA to hurl it at Málaga, after a titanic tantrum from owner, manager and players after Tuesday’s Champions League exit.

Dortmund’s winning goal came after an ungiven offside that was put down to racism, corruption, conspiracy and prejudice, with Málaga's Director General promising to send a complaint to UEFA. “We're not going against UEFA, we're moving in favour of football,” commented Vicente Casado.

But on Wednesday, UEFA released a small dove of peace through a window of opportunity for Málaga to holler an apology. “If a team loses in 93 minutes, clearly they are going to be a bit disappointed and say things they don’t really think,” said UEFA's General Secretary, the shine-headed draw host Gianni Infantino. LLL doubts that Málaga will take heed and will end up joining the long list of Spanish clubs that think UEFA have got it in for them.
LLL Prediction - Home win

SUNDAY

Rayo Vallecano (9th) v Real Sociedad (4th) - 12.00
At last, the word ‘Europe’ is allowed in the Rayo dressing room. With the Madrid side having pretty much assured safety in the division through last week’s win at Celta, Rayo are dreaming the biggest of dreams, and Europe is a formal topic of conversation in the Republic of Vallekas.

“We talk about Europe every day. We’ll do everything we can to get there,” promised forward Piti. Indeed, the club have been busy scribbling and have sent their documentation off to UEFA to register for next year’s competitions just in case.

The other topic of conversation for Piti was his immediate future, with the striker’s contract expiring at the end of the season and no indication on what happens next: “I’ve said many times that this is the club where I want to stay, so now it has to be the president who makes the next step.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Atlético Madrid (3rd) v Granada (16th) - 17.00
There’s something troubling LLL regarding Atlético Madrid at the moment. They're shattering the belief that the fewer games a side plays, the better their results due to stuff like rest and all that. But the Rojiblancos are busting that myth – in the wrong way. Ever since the club’s departure from the Europa League towards the end of February, Atlético have won just two league games from six, a poor comparison with the 70% win rate when they were playing two matches a week.

Diego Simeone says that there’s nothing to worry about, and that Atlético Madrid are trooping along just fine in third. “We did a really big first round of matches but it’s harder in the second,” said the Argentinian coach. "Now, everyone has something to play for in nearly every ground. The Spanish league is very competitive."
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Zaragoza (17th) v Barcelona (1st) - 19.00
Zaragoza goalkeeper Roberto remains the club's busiest employee, called into action more often than the emergency services during the Valencia ‘Fires’ festival. Roberto is keen to keep busy off the field too by suggesting a mental approach from his players for the final eight games of the season.

“We need to be able to think that we are at the bottom of the table without actually touching it,” mused the former Atlético Madrid man ahead of the visit of Barcelona. “I’d like to think that this reaction is possible without going into relegation zone.” It may be an academic point, and it may be the only point they get: results this weekend may well send the Aragonese outfit into the drop zone for what would be the first time in the current campaign.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Athletic Bilbao (13th) v Real Madrid (2nd) - 21.00
There's always something to get everyone in the Real Madrid media world into a tizzy while annoying the pants out of either José Mourinho and Aitor Karanka at press conferences. Currently, that topic is Iker Casillas, who remains on the bench watching Diego López between the Madrid sticks and doing reasonably well. Well enough in fact to keep the Real Madrid goalkeeper on the sidelines for the rest of the season.

During the week, Mourinho said that Casillas was training “very well” –in contrast to Madrid's former Sporting Director Arrigo Sacchi, who opined that “Iker trains badly, he always trains badly. There’s a reason Mourinho leaves him out.” However, Iker’s outcast has caused transfer stirrings in the press, with AS claiming that Liverpool and Arsenal are sniffing about, meaning that both Big Two goalies in la Liga could be putting on their gloves in England next season.
LLL Prediction - Away win

MONDAY

Mallorca (20th) v Celta Vigo (19th) - 21.00
Blimey, there'll be some nervous tum-tums in the Balearics and Galicia this weekend with fans of both clubs having to wait until Monday night for this crucial relegation clash.

Mallorca are rather concerned that the temporary truce with disgruntled fans has been broken after three straight defeats and 13 goals shipped. Five of those were against Barcelona after a hopeless display in the Camp Nou, irrespective of the quality of the opposition. Heck, even Mallorca’s Pedro Bigas admits that last weekend’s match was a shambles.

“We have to change our dynamic and attitude,” fumed the defender. “The players didn’t go out (against Barça) planning this attitude. I don’t know how to explain it.” The squad had better find a reason quickly over what will be a very long weekend of waiting indeed.
LLL Prediction - Home win

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Málaga cry conspiracy after climactic Champions League catastrophe

2013-04-10T10:29:00Z

It was almost enough to bring a tear to La Liga Loca’s eye. Almost. No, not Málaga’s heartbreaking and somewhat controversial departure from the Champions League, but listening to a distraught Joaquín discussing the topic on Spanish radio station Cadena Ser after Tuesday’s match.

Normally, the Málaga winger is the smiliest person on the planet; always showing good humour and cracking jokes. But Joaquín sounded as if he was about to melt into a pool of despair when going over the side’s injury time exit to Borussia Dortmund.

The scorer of the first goal in the 3-2 defeat summed up the feeling in the Málaga camp with regards to the root cause for their departure from the Champions League after the Germans knocked in a late offsider winner: UEFA and Michel Platini have got it in for them. “We aren’t Real Madrid or Barça so it’s easy to do this to us,” retorted Joaquín in reference to the current ban imposed on Málaga for all European competitions for next year.

Even the normally very coy and diplomatic Manuel Pellegrini hinted something fishy was going on. “What happened was far from the parameters of what we were able to manage,” advised the Málaga coach. “It’s difficult for a team under sanctions to play in the Champions League final.”

Málaga midfielder Ignacio Camacho claimed his side were “robbed”, while an indignant AS reported that "[Scottish referee] Thomson puts Málaga out,” overlooking the fact Málaga’s second goal was also offside.

Club president Abdullah bin Nasser Al Thani had another, more ‘out there’ explanation for Málaga’s exit. “This is not football, but racism and clear as all (sic),” he tweeted.

It was quite the outburst from a figure who has over the last year been strangely silent on several key questions. These include why players had gone unpaid then sold suddenly, why transfer payments had gone into arrears with other clubs and what exactly the future holds for Málaga. But it’s good to know the club’s bigwig is still alive and kicking, all the same.

An early goal for Cristiano Ronaldo in Istanbul had LLL, like anyone else watching the game, mentally switching off, with Madrid 4-0 up on aggregate. The problem is that the visiting players did the same and Galatasaray managed to pull three back with some twenty minutes left, to leave viewers thinking “they couldn’t could they?”.

The answer was the negative, with Madrid hanging on and Ronaldo - “a hell’s angel” according to Marca - scoring a late second for Madrid.

“I hope this serves as a lesson for the future,” scolded a player who now has 11 Champions League goals for the season.

Mourinho was not entirely happy with the result, as was to be expected, but praised Madrid’s Turkish opponents and also the crowd, with the Portuguese always happy to find a chance to make a comparison with the somnambulant Santiago Bernabéu. “You don’t play against eleven, but 50,011,” noted Mourinho.

And on to Barcelona, who host PSG on Wednesday evening after a first leg that ended up 2-2 in Paris. Early confidence at the Camp Nou might have been diminished somewhat by Tuesday night’s madness in the Champions League, and that may well have an influence on whether the pinging hamstring of Leo Messi will be taking to the field from the start. The forward still hasn’t got an anti-sick note from the club doctors and won’t get it until a late fitness test, although the front cover of ‘Sport’ notes that Messi “wants to play”.

Normally, whatever Messi wants, Messi gets, but Francesc Aguilar, writing in Mundo Deportivo, recalls that “only Tito has convinced Messi that he should start on the bench four times this season. He will try to have him sat down at his side from the start, but later on, it will be more difficult to stop him going out onto the pitch.”

Judging by the dramatics of Tuesday night, Barça fans will now be more than happy to see the Argentinean parked on his bum for 90 minutes, as that will signify a calm, quiet night for the Catalan club.

A magical night in store for Málaga, as players prepare to pull together for Pellegrini

2013-04-09T10:28:00Z

La Liga Loca has a sneaky feeling. It’s a completely nonsensical, irrational feeling that flies in the face of all football logic - not unlike the concept of Riki scoring 12 league goals this season for Deportivo, in fact. The blog has the feeling Málaga are going to prevail in Tuesday’s Champions League quarter-final clash against Borussia Dortmund.

In theory, it should be a doozy for the home side, after a goalless draw in Spain and with the second leg being played out in front of 65,000 particularly noisy fans. “They will forgive us if we miss our first chance and they are behind us,” was the reminder from Jürgen Klopp on Monday, with the Dortmund boss warning that “patience is going to be the key.”

There’s a whole host of other reasons to believe the Germans are sure-fire semi-finalists. Firstly, Dortmund are much, much better than Málaga, which LLL has been told is an important factor in football. Then there’s the reality that the visitors are without one half of a strong centre-back unit, with Weligton suspended.

But LLL has visions of Málaga getting an early goal - Julio Baptista bundling home from a corner - holding on for another 75 minutes before conceding an equaliser, then holding firm and scraping through on away goals. The dream then goes on to see Málaga beating Real Madrid 15-0 over two legs and Manuel Pellegrini giving Florentino Pérez a cheeky little wave at the end of the ties, a salute to a figure who fired the Chilean after just a season at the Santiago Bernabéu.

At time of writing, Málaga’s coach is set to arrive in Germany late, as his father sadly died shortly before the club’s league match against Real Sociedad on Saturday. The manager returned to Chile for the funeral but is making a swift turnaround to head back to Europe for Tuesday’s clash. “I hope we reward him with a great game, he deserves it,” said Martín Demichelis. “In moments like this, the whole group felt the loss,” confessed Jesús Gámez, the only survivor from Málaga’s second division days, which ended as recently as 2008.

There is no such tension ahead of Real Madrid’s clash with Galatasaray. As José Mourinho noted, if the Spanish side went out of the quarter-final tie in Istanbul, then the world would swallow the club up and everyone would have to remain in exile in Turkey for the rest of their football lives. Madrid have a 3-0 advantage from last week’s clash and have successfully passed through all 21 previous European knock-out ties with the matching scoreline.

What’s more, only 6% of clashes in Europe with the same first leg have ever seen a swing in the other direction. And certainly not when the accommodating back four of Galatasaray is involved.

Predicting Real Madrid’s march towards the semi-finals is not exactly bold. But the forecast of two Spanish clubs having terrific Tuesday’s certainly is. Málaga will be triumphant against Borussia Dortmund. It’s written in the stars.*

*Or they'll concede within 25 seconds and get hammered 6-0.

Moving moments in Camp Nou, Falcao fires blanks, Madrid’s ‘ugly duckling’ on form

2013-04-08T10:35:00Z

Good Day

Eric Abidal
There were two moving and inspiring moments during Barça’s 5-0 win over Mallorca. The first was the sight of Tito Vilanova back on the Camp Nou touchline, looking displeased as ever by his back four, the second was the triumphant return of Eric Abidal, after receiving a liver transplant a year ago.
The physical and mental strength to achieve this goal after such a serious procedure is something truly superhuman. The defender came on to a huge ovation from the home crowd and played 21 minutes to seal the clean sheet for Barcelona. “It was an intense moment for everyone as he’s so loved by the squad,” said Jordi Roura whilst counterpart for the night, Gregorio Manzano, reiterated that it was “great news for the sport and for Barça.”

Cesc Fabregas & Alexis Sánchez
A very good night for the two players criticised most often by Barça fans this season. The former Arsenal man knocked in a hat-trick playing in a false No.9 role - Cesc’s grr ‘happy but not showing it’ celebration was a delight - while Alexis bagged a brace. It was an all-round good day for Barça, with a clean sheet and proof that the side can (sometimes) live without Leo Messi - at least when facing truly hopeless opponents.

Gonzalo Higuaín
Even the Madrid-based scribes under orders to dislike the Argentine (due to him being a Ramón Calderón signing) would have been hard pushed not to applaud his efforts in the 5-1 win against Levante. But then again, perhaps not. As Roberto Palomar wrote in Monday’s Marca, “Higuaín is the ugly duckling of Madrid. Always will be. The president will never be off his feet to celebrate his goals like he did with Benzema.”
Aside from that highlight, it was an unbelievably flattering scoreline for Madrid, who looked in danger of being pegged back to 2-2, with seven minutes to go before a flurry of late goals crushed Levante’s spirit.

Real Sociedad
Just fantastic. Ruthless la Real sensed an understandably distracted and probably fairly tired Málaga and took full advantage with a 4-2 win to make it just the single defeat from 20.

Valencia
Merciful Zeus, Valencia were lucky to win this one after a troubled week off the field which saw the resignation of club president Manuel Llorente. It’s true the Mestalla club dominated the chances, but there was a touch of controversy in injury time with the scores at 1-1. A throw-in deep in Valencia territory was apparently awarded to Valladolid. Valencia took it instead and ended up scoring the winner from that play, with the referee letting things carry on. If Barça or Madrid were on the end of that decision, you’d hear about it for decades, but as it’s Valladolid....meh.

Rubén Castro
Here’s a fun fact for you. Betis striker Rubén Castro has scored as many goals from open play (14) as Falcao, this season. It’s just that the Canary Islander doesn’t have eight penalties to fluff the figures up a bit to create talk of €50m moves to Chelsea. Rubén Castro was magnificent on Friday in the 5-1 win at Granada, as were Betis, a team who are such a beautiful sight to behold when in full flight and in full spanking mode (LLL had better stop there).

Getafe
“I’d like it if people spoke about us more,” admitted Getafe boss Luis García after the goalless draw with Atlético Madrid that left the Coliseum club safe in eighth after a run of seven matches unbeaten.

Rayo Vallecano
Rayo bouncing right back from last week’s defeat in the face of Celta with a 2-0 win that had coach Paco Jémez announcing that “Europe is not a dream, but a reality” with the Madrid side in ninth on a tasty total of 44 points.

Wakaso Mubarak
The midfielder took a while to get back into Javier Aguirre’s good books, having taken a little bit too long to get back from international duty with Ghana after the Africa Cup of Nations. But it was pats on the head all round after he scored the game-clinching goal in the dying seconds of Espanyol's 2-0 win at Osasuna. The result gives the Pericos ‘virtual safety’ - as Marca claim - with 39 points after a run of picking up seven points from nine.

Deportivo
They couldn’t could they? Three wins in a row against relegation rivals suggests they can, with Depor now just one point away from safety after a 3-2 victory against Zaragoza. “We are a bit closer,” admitted coach, Fernando Vasquez, although the next four matches are tough ones with a trip to Levante, the visit of Athletic Bilbao, a journey to take on Betis and then Atlético Madrid coming to town.

Bad Day

Falcao
Both the Atlético Madrid striker and his club appear to be running out of steam, with third position all but sealed for the Vicente Calderón club, despite the lingering threat of la Real 11 points behind. The Rojiblancos have managed just the one victory in five, with just a single goal from the Colombian in that spell. “Strikers have their moments. He’s fine and on the way to scoring the same number of goals as last season,” was the retort from Diego Simeone, when his footballer was questioned.

Miroslav Djukic
“I was on the touchline going nuts,” admitted the Valladolid coach on the aforementioned winner for Valencia.

Osasuna
The normally hard-to-penetrate-in-Pamplona Osasuna are showing themselves to have quite the ticklish underbelly of late, with Sunday’s 2-0 defeat to Espanyol their third straight home defeat. At the moment, Osasuna don’t seem to have that extra kick in them to get away from the relegation zone, but matches against the likes of Getafe, Granada and Sevilla in the final run-in should give Osasuna the points needed for another Primera adventure.

Granada
Completely disastrous. That can be the only conclusion for Granada after Friday’s 5-1 home defeat to Betis. Three goals conceded in three minutes in what can be described as an iffy phase for Granada did the damage. However, despite having picked up just two points from the past 21 available, Granada are still out of the drop zone.

Manolo Jiménez
The Zaragoza coach was poked into speaking to the press after Sunday's defeat to Deportivo, with the aim of calming everyone down. Zaragoza are still out of the relegation zone, but are without a victory in 2013 in a run of 13 matches. “When you fall, it’s important to pick yourself up,” said Jiménez who said he had no plans to quit. That bounce-back has to take place next Sunday against visiting Barcelona next Sunday. Oh dear.

Celta Vigo
All the good work from last week’s draw with Barcelona was undone in a 2-0 defeat in Galicia to Rayo Vallecano. “If we give up then we can’t do anything,” admitted manager, Abel Resino.

Mallorca
A third successive defeat for Mallorca sends the side to the bottom of la Primera and probably needing six wins from eight to stay up. LLL warned Dudu Aouate against calling this clash a ‘final’ with the result that it would probably be lost. And that’s exactly what happened. “We gave the game away,” complained the Mallorca keeper. “We are playing for our lives but it didn’t look like it.”

Madrid authorities block march for Mourinho, Mallorca face unfortunate 'final'

2013-04-05T08:47:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's Tim Stannard previews the weekend's action in La Liga

Friday

Granada (16th) v Betis (7th) - 21.00 CEST
The home side in this Andalusian derby have completely ground to a halt, with just two points trawled from the sea bed of la Primera from the past 18 available and not a single goal scored from open play in three games. Granada boss Lucas Alcaraz lamented that “at the moment we are not creating chances and the mistakes we are making are being punished severely.”
The news in Betis has surrounded a reported interest from Belgium in manager Pepe Mel, with Standard Liege looking to snap up a coach who has lead the Seville side into the top flight and possibly even into Europe, if all goes well. Yet Mel has been rumoured to be on the chopping block every time results have gone the wrong way, so he could be forgiven for considering the move. The Betis boss told local television: “I’ve got one more year on my contract and I’m normally faithful to what I sign. What’s more, I would never do anything that could harm Betis.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Saturday

Real Sociedad (4th) v Málaga (5th) - 16.00 CEST
While Málaga’s ongoing journey in the Champions League sees the chances increase of Manuel Pellegrini leaving for pastures new, the same situation should be occurring at Real Sociedad. The side lead by Philippe Montanier has now suffered just the single defeat in 19 and are in the Champions League positions, which should see quite a few clubs sniffing around the Frenchman. Indeed, Montanier might still be leaving San Sebastian, but potentially because the club don’t want the manager to stay.
During the week, la Real’s Sporting Director Lorenzo Juarros had his contract renewed, but was still cagey on whether the same would be happening with his underling. “Managers are always being offered to us,” revealed Juarros, “but over the past few weeks they’ve been calling less, seeing the league table. Possibly some understand that that now it’s difficult to compete with Montanier.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (2nd) v Levante (10th) - 18.00 CEST
Bad news for about nine angry men on Saturday. The local council has refused permission for a pre-match pro-Mourinho march for a distance of about 400 metres to the stadium. The denial wasn’t made on the grounds that it was a particularly dumb idea, but due to the paperwork not being submitted in time. The only other story of note ahead of this clash was the possible reuniting of David Navarro, the forearm smasher of Levante, and Cristiano Ronaldo, who scored a goal in the last league fixture between these two teams with just the single eye open, thanks to the other being closed by the aforementioned stopper. Sadly, Navarro is suspended for this particular tie, but hopefully Sergio Ballesteros is back for another famous running race with the Real Madrid forward....
LLL Prediction - Home win

Deportivo (20th) v Zaragoza (17th) - 20.00 CEST
Good King Wenceslas, this is a humdinger of a match. In the past two games, Deportivo have beaten relegation rivals in Celta Vigo and Mallorca and now they have another wriggling victim served up on the Riazor platter. “We are still last and it’s still going to be difficult,” warned Juan Carlos Valerón, reflecting on a few weeks that has given Deportivo the teeniest chance of staying up, with the Galician side four points from safety - and fourth-from-bottom Zaragoza. The home team are set to go for an all-or-nothing approach on Saturday, with the midfielder reporting that “the team is going for it, and is taking risks.” Considering Zaragoza are still without a win in 2013, that might just be enough.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Mallorca (19th) - 22.00 CEST
Mallorca goalkeeper Dudu Aouate said the visit of and subsequent defeat to Deportivo last week served as a little bit of a practice for Saturday’s late game, as apparently the Galicians “played a bit like Barça despite being bottom.” There’s a good chance Mallorca are going to end up in that exact same position by Sunday morning, with near-certain loss to the Catalan club in the Camp Nou, and a predicted victory for Deportivo. So perhaps not the best time for the Israeli net-tender to announce that Saturday’s game was “a final”. LLL advises it was the occasion perhaps for the other cliché of ‘our league is starting next week’ or ‘ this match is not our fight’.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Celta Vigo (18th) v Rayo Vallecano (9th) - 12.00 CEST
The contract renewal of managers is going to be a bit of a recurring theme over the coming weeks, so bear with LLL. This topic is the main talk of the town in Vallecas, with Rayo having picked up enough points to stay up without being overly interested in a European push, the blog suspects, although it would be a joy to see a club like Arsenal coming to the three-sided Vallecas stadium in the Europa League.
Speaking this week, Rayo president Raúl Martín insisted he was “very optimistic” that coach Paco Jémez would be staying on, although that issue is linked to the small matter of 14 footballers currently out of contract come June. “We are happy with his performance, but the sporting direction will decide who fits into the project,” advised the Rayo president.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Osasuna (15th) v Espanyol (12th) - 17.00 CEST
LLL was a little bit Monty Burns last weekend, when catching Espanyol’s clash with Real Sociedad. It leaned forward to ponder “who is this sprightly young thing, called Sergio García.” Turns out it was the same one who has been as Espanyol for two-and-a-half seasons now, but without doing too much since the arrival of Javier Aguirre. García has had a bit of an image change - huge pony tail gone and natty beard developed - and claims that “I think that I’m playing at my best level, every day I feel better.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Getafe (8th) v Atlético Madrid (3rd) - 19.00 CEST
There are many fascinating talking points in regards to Atlético Madrid’s world, including whether the side is running out of steam a little. On Monday, the local Atleti supporting bar owner announced with some pleasure that “the rest of the season will be a disaster,” but there’s only one issue that truly mattered in LLL’s very Rojiblanco barrio. Arda Turan’s magnificent LMAO-esque hair.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Valencia (6th) v Valladolid (14th) - 21.00 CEST
Valladolid were hopping mad about what they viewed as naughty approaches towards their winger, fullback type-thing Patrick Ebert. Keen LLL readers will remember a Marca exclusive from last week reporting a meeting over lunch between the German, who has a contract with Valladolid until 2014, and Atlético Madrid Sporting Director José Luis Caminero. What would have hurt the most, though, is that the Rojiblancos suit had two playing spells at Valladolid and was even the side’s Director of Football.
A formal communication was published on the Valladolid web site claiming two meetings between the pair, the first being on 21 February at the Vicente Calderón and the second on 27th March. No comment was made until Monday, apparently, “to give time to Atlético Madrid to apologise for the behaviour of their Sporting Director.” To date, no response has been made by the Rojiblancos to the affair.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Sevilla (11th) v Athletic Bilbao (13th) - 22.00 CEST
These two teams should walk onto the pitch with heads bowed at a ludicrously late time on Monday night, and sit on stools of shame for 90 minutes, rather than playing a game of football. Both former bigwigs outfits have had lamentable campaigns. Sevilla have had just the one away win in 15 and Marcelo Bielsa at Athletic is so mixed up that the Argentinean brought on Iker Muniain in last Monday’s match as a substitute, then brought the forward off again 15 minutes later. Former Sevilla boss, Míchel, has been talking about the lack of progress since his departure and Unai Emery’s arrival and noted that “you can’t strive to win the Tour, if you are stuck in the pelotón.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Málaga’s magic match, Barça’s pricey Paris night and a shock in the Bernabéu

2013-04-03T09:23:00Z

La Liga Liga has gone rogue. For too long, the blog’s attempts at Champions League previews have generally seen Málaga squeezed in at the end of the update behind all things Real Madrid and Barcelona. Heck, the blog has even dedicated more time to Valencia, a team destined to go out at the last 16 stages every year for an eternity and a half.

But today's blog leads on Málaga’s home clash with Borussia Dortmund, in what is going to be a seething, sweating stadium on Spain’s south coast. LLL actually thinks Málaga have a chance against the German visitors, as blooming impressive as the Bundesliga champions may be. While Málaga are certainly the overachievers in the tournament, the Spanish side isn't filled with shirking wallflowers looking to wander about taking photographs of their 'big day out'.

While there are wee nippers in the team, such as Isco, Málaga are stuffed with warhorses like Martín Demichelis, Jérémy Toulalan, Javier Saviola, Roque Santa Cruz and Joaquín, who have 229 Champions League appearances between then. Indeed, the latter has played in the competition with three different Spanish teams and announced ahead of Wednesday’s game that “you have suffer whilst competing and enjoy it too". The the cheeky-grinned winger added: "If we play at our best level then we have a chance."

There is no word on whether Málaga’s owner, Sheikh Abdullah Al Thani, will be attending the game, or indeed whether anyone in Spain will be watching the clash, considering it is on at the same time as Real Madrid vs Galatasaray. “Málaga folk know that the Real Madrid support will keep a little place in their white hearts to celebrate the goals of ‘Euromálaga’ on the Bernabéu scoreboards,” writes Tomás Roncero in AS. Bless.

In Spain, there is a joke that the people of Catalonia can be a touch tight when it comes to money. That’s certainly that sense the morning after Barça’s Champions League clash in Paris, with both Mundo Deportivo and Sport leading on the theme that the result was very ‘expensive’ in the same way that buying a round of drinks then not having everybody buy you one in return, might be.

“The bill at the end of the game is very costly,” tutted Joan Vehils, complaining that he only had the soup and two beers. “PSG are an inferior team to Barça but in the Champions League any error is expensive.” This is certainly the case for Barça who are now set to be without the sometimes delivering Leo Messi for three weeks and Javier Mascherano potentially for six weeks due to what looked like a messed up leg. Despite all this bad news for Barcelona , it was wonderful to see Tito Vilanova on the touchline again, and he gave his defence the same kind of stern looking over as someone returning from holiday to find the results of a house party in their abode.

In a shock development in Madrid, the pre-match build up to the visit of Galatasaray was all about José Mourinho, after a long lecture and finger wag to the press about bias, no footballer being an automatic choice in any team and the collective being more important than the individual. The eyebrows of Iker Casillas and Sergio Ramos - both dropped on the whim of their coach in the past - have yet to return to their normal positions after hearing that particular statement. “His performances can only be criticised by someone who is not impartial,” was the rebuke of Mourinho in regards to current Madrid goalkeeper, Diego López.

“Mourinho writes the rules at this Madrid, he writes them in chalk, to wipe them out when he wants and rewrite them after,” sighs AS editor Alfredo Relaño. As for the result of Wednesday's game, the only shock of the evening is likely to be related to the noise created by the reported influx of 15,000 Galatasaray fans to Real Madrid’s home, creating something rarely witnessed in the Santiago Bernabéu - an atmosphere.

Top two take their feet off the gas, as Deportivo begin fightback

2013-04-02T09:44:00Z

Good Day

Leo Messi
Beautiful symmetry from Messi, who last failed to score a goal in la Liga on 3rd November against Celta Vigo, 19 rounds ago. The Argentinean has now stuck away at least one effort in every game since, in a 29 goal run. LLL is not that impressed though. Nobody likes a show-off.

Diego López
Iker Casillas may be back in shape again after suffering a crocked hand, but the Real Madrid captain isn’t going to shift his understudy. So says a jubilant José Mourinho, who is probably delighted to be plonking his arch nemesis back on the bench. “Playing like this, it’s difficult that he won’t be in goal,” said the Madrid manager on the winter window signing ahead of the upcoming games.

Pedro Morales
Málaga’s Chilean midfielder had quite the afternoon. Two assists and a cracking long distance strike were delivered by a player who is getting to grips with life at Málaga, having joined on loan until the end of the season. “On a personal level, I’m very happy, as there have been some tough moments this year, so this was very important for me.” The result was the perfect warm-up for this week’s visit of Borussia Dortmund.

Betis & Getafe
La Liga Loca is plonking both teams in the Good Day section after a goalless draw, for contributions to an entertaining, chance-stuffed goalless game, despite playing at the ludicrous time of 10pm on a Monday night.

Levante
A 1-0 home win against Sevilla may sounds like it was bit of a gritty affair, but Saturday’s late night nosh-up in Valencia was good fun. To be fair to Sevilla, a draw would probably have been a more equitable result, but it’s tough do-dos as Levante pick up their first win in seven matches to move into a much comfier position of 40 league points. “Another step to reach safety as soon as possible,” was the opinion of Levante boss, Juan Ignacio Martínez.

Espanyol & Real Sociedad
Both sides served up a cracking match in Cornella, where Real Sociedad came back from behind twice in a 2-2 draw. La Real are now unbeaten in 19 games, while Espanyol moved further away from the relegation zone. “When I took over the team on 1st December, I would have chopped off my finger if someone could have said that we’d be 12 points away from the danger zone at this stage of the season,” said a chuffed Javier Aguirre after the match.

Ariz Aduriz
A headed effort from a corner (what else with Athletic Bilbao?) saw the forward score the winner in a 1-0 victory over Granada - the striker's first goal in nine league games. The strike earned three points for the Basque side, who seem genuinely spooked by the idea they could get dragged into the relegation battle if they don’t get a move on up the table.

Kike Sola
Osasuna’s 3-1 away win at Valladolid saw two teams behaving a little out sorts after the international break. Valladolid don’t tend to concede three at home - only the current top three have managed to do inflict that on them this season - and Osasuna don’t tend to score three away from home. The scorer of two of those three Osasuna goals, Kike Sola, doesn’t tend to net too often either, with a Liga scoring rate of one-in-four since making his debut for the first team in 2007.

Rodri
A very sprightly performance from the Zaragoza attacker, as he made his first start of the season. He hassled the ankles off a befuddled Luka Modric in the first half and popped in Zaragoza’s opener, too. The home side weren’t able to keep up the pace in the second 45 minutes - the introduction of some big guns like Mesut Özil made the difference for Madrid - but the confidence boost to a flagging team who have yet to win in 2013 will be as handy as an unexpected point.

Natxo Insa
The Celta midfielder scored the Galician’s opener and revealed to the world a rarely seen barnet. Shaved at the sides, fairly long Mohican on top, combined with a receding hairline, it certainly caught the eye as much as the scoreline, which saw Celta take advantage of a somnambulant Barça on Saturday evening in a 2-2 draw. “What I liked the most is that we respected Barça without fearing them,” Celta boss Abel Resino growled - which is what he does most of the time.

Deportivo
LLL is still not convinced about the side’s survival chances, with the Galicians on 23 points with nine to play, but back-to-back wins against Celta Vigo and the 3-2 win at Mallorca on Sunday can’t have done any harm.

Bad Day

Barcelona & Real Madrid
Well, both sides could at least try to pretend there’s a title race going on. Barça dropped two points at Celta Vigo, so Real Madrid responded by dropping a pair at Zaragoza. “Our objective in the league is to finish second and obviously win every game,” announced José Mourinho in regards to Madrid’s plan for the next couple of months, which entails doing slightly better than Atlético Madrid, apparently.
Alex Song, Martín Montoya, Marc Batra and co took to the field for Barcelona - with Leo Messi, of course - and Jordi Roura managed to keep a straight face promising that “the match was very important for us today,” ahead of Tuesday’s visit to France to take on PSG.
“The worst part about the game was that those who had the most to demonstrate, offered the least,” wrote Joan Vehils in Sport, pointing a finger at Thiago and Alexis, “Vilanova has a lot of work to do with this footballer,” was the verdict on the former.

Atlético Madrid & Valencia
A tad arbitrary perhaps, and maybe driven by the fun of sticking all of Spain’s biggest teams into the Bad Day section. Sure, a 1-1 draw between the two sides at a very rainy Vicente Calderón may have been a decent result for the duo in isolation, but the outcome saw Atlético missing the chance move back into second place above Real Madrid, while Valencia were unable to take advantage of dropped points for Real Sociedad in fourth losing ground on Málaga for good measure.

Rayo Vallecano
Two set-piece sleepy-times from the Rayo back line pretty much cost the Madrid side the points in a 3-1 loss at home to Málaga. “They finished us off with the mistakes we made,” fumed Rayo boss, Paco Jémez.

Sevilla
Another away day, another defeat for Sevilla, who have just the single victory on the road. That one win, four draws and 10 defeats is the campaign’s sorry return in 15 matches. The latest failure away from the Sánchez Pizjuán was at Levante in a 1-0 loss. “We need to find a way not to repeat these defeats,” noted Unai Emery, in a lament that sounded very familiar to that of the Sevilla manager’s predecessor, Míchel.

Granada
The 1-0 defeat to Athletic sees Granada without a win in six under Lucas Alcaraz, who had made such a strong start at the club. However they are now without a goal from open play in three matches.

Mallorca
If la Liga’s participants are going to talk about ‘finals’ all the time, then LLL might as well join in. Mallorca lost one on Sunday at home to Deportivo, leaving the Balearic club in 19th and Gregorio Manzano with an an awful lot of motivating exercises to get through before heading to the Camp Nou for his side’s next match. “We wanted to give a great time to the crowd, who were fantastic,” was the lament from the Mallorca boss.

Málaga prepare for battle, Zaragoza prepare for the impossible, Espanyol prepare to get dirty

2013-03-28T10:24:00Z

Saturday

Rayo Vallecano (9th) vs Málaga (6th) - 16.00 (all KOs local time)
As Málaga gear up for one major battle in the Champions League against Borussia Dortmund, another is on the horizon in the courts. The club will continue their attempts to reverse UEFA’s ruling that they should be banned from European competition for next season through the Court of Arbitration for Sport. The first oral arguments are set to be heard on 14th May, with Málaga Director General Vicente Casado saying: “we are optimistic. There are no debts to players or teams.”
Meanwhile, Rayo are still trying to pin down the future of manager Paco Jémez, and apparently have a verbal agreement on a deal. But like a number of clubs in la Primera this season, there may be distance between the kind of contract the manager would like and the sort that Rayo can afford. Not a big one, probably.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Celta Vigo (19th) vs Barcelona (1st) - 18.00
While the Celta Vigo bosses may have been hoped otherwise, the two week international break gave fans the opportunity to mull over their defeat to Deportivo. The disastrous 3-1 loss saw a sending off for headbutt-happy Iago Aspas, a smart move that sees Celta facing four matches without their suspended top scorer. Aspas will have suffered a fortnight of teammates telling him he’s a bit of an idiot, and to be fair, the striker doesn’t really have much of a defence to mount.
“I don’t really know what happened,” admitted the Celta man on the clash of heads with Carlos Marchena, “some moments have been wiped out. I’m sorry for my teammates, for the fans, as it was a big game and we lost.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Zaragoza (17th) vs Real Madrid (2nd) - 20.00
The hosts haven’t won a game in 2013, have the worse home record in la Liga (three victories from 13), haven't scored in three matches, have failed to score in over half their league games and haven't had a goal scored from open play by a player not called Helder Postiga since January 4th. That player was Francisco Montañés, and it’s no wonder he sounds rather desperate ahead of the visit of Madrid, a side to whom they’ve conceded 10 goals in their last two meetings. “Everything is possible when you have faith, and we have it,” claimed the midfielder.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Levante (11th) vs Sevilla (10th)- 22.00
Levante's elimination from the Europa League at the hands of Rubin Kazan will see their season go one of two ways. They'll either fall into a bit of a slump and edge towards the relegation fight as one of those dark horses who end up going down, or pull their socks up into the appropriate positions and pick up the two wins or so needed to get to the 42 point mark, and maybe even make a late tilt for the European places. Levante boss, Juan Ignacio Jiménez, is leaning towards the latter. “I’m not looking for excuses but the Europa League took a lot out of us in every way. We paid for it in la Liga,” said JIM of Levante’s recent run of seven matches without a victory.
However, should Levante get back into Europe for another mazy adventue, JIM may not be there sitting on the bench with the managing admitting that “I hope tomorrow a team with a big budget comes to my door.” Looking at la Liga’s finances, that visitor probably won’t be speaking Spanish.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Valladolid (12th) vs Osasuna (15th) - 12.00
While it's currently all the rage to say that certain games are for ‘football hipsters’, this particular meeting is for those who have literally nothing better to do with their time. Valladolid are having a fine season, hidden away in mid-table, avoiding any fuss and nonsense, while Osasuna are on a bit of a bad run of three defeats, but this games screams of an aimless-hoof laden goalless draw that will just about keep everyone happy. However, Osasuna midfielder Sisi thinks three points are a dead cert for his side, and also joked that his team were probably better off without him, having just recovered from injury. “They didn’t miss me,” joked Sisi, noting that when he was playing, “we were last.”
LLL Prediction - Goalless Draw

Mallorca (18th) vs Deportivo (20th) - 17.00
La Liga Loca doesn’t want to sound mean (when sounding mean) but two weeks with Mallorca coach and sports psychology specialist, Gregorio Manzano, is probably going to feel like a veeeeeeeeery long time. Especially for footballers, who can usually only by coaxed into sitting still for longer than three minutes by being shown pictures of cars, ladies or ladies in cars. Or something really shiny.
Manzano has used the international break to explain how he transformed his players from really bad, to not so bad in such a short space of time.The process began on day one of his third spell at the club at the beginning of February, when he showed the team a DVD of all the great moments in the club’s history. Not even LLL is mean enough to suggest there wasn't enough time to boil the kettle before the end credits were rolling. The aim was then to turn the players' fears into strengths because, as the Mallorca boss explains: “if anxiety is well-controlled, it’s positive. When the target is close and not too far away, anxiety can be positive as it’s something achievable.”
Mallorca are on 24 points and need a whopper of a win against bottom-of-the-table Deportivo on Sunday.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Espanyol (13th) vs Real Sociedad (4th) - 19.00
One of the joys of having Javier Aguirre back in the league is the tremendous dirtiness his sides bring to the sport. The team currently lead the way in terms of fouls committed and yellow cards, with Argentinean defender Juan Forlín admitting “we play hard and we are a team that competes. No ball is lost, but we don’t go out in bad faith”.
Despite now Espanyol looking safe after some very worrying moments before Aguirre took over at the end of November, Marca reports that no decision will be made on the Mexican's contract until the moment the Pericos are safe.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Atlético Madrid (3rd) vs Valencia (5th) - 21.00
So, Patrick Ebert, if you're so happy playing for Valladolid, as claimed earlier this week, then why did you have lunch on Wednesday with Atlético Madrid Sporting Director, José Luis Pérez Caminero, in a restaurant near Segovia! Well? Explain yourself!
To be fair, LLL doesn’t really care, but Marca (who uncovered this meeting) do, and so do Rojiblanco fans, who will probably appreciate having the German on the right flank as a challenge to the current omnipotence of Juanfran.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Athletic Bilbao (14th) vs Granada (16th) - 20.00
LLL was struggling to get excited about this particular encounter, which has a huge whiff of a 2-0 Athletic win about it, but the blog had no idea it was overlooking an event of galaxy-sized implications. “It’s the match of the year and we are playing for our lives,” yelled Athletic’s Andre Herrera, with his side an apparently perilous eight points from the relegation zone. “We can’t live in the past and the marvelous year we had. This is a transcendental, fundamental match,” claimed the midfielder.
Granada are also getting in on the act of hyping up Monday’s game with Nolita coming to the very predictable conclusion that “from now on, every match is a final.”
LLL Prediction - Home win (2-0)

Betis (7th) vs Getafe (8th) - 22.00
You have a whole holiday weekend to schedule games, so what’s the logical move? Put the Betis home game on at 22.00 on a Monday night just to deny anyone unfortunate enough to have to get up early the next morning more than four hours sleep. Ludicrous.
Anyway, Getafe go into the game on 42 points and having to decide whether they fancy a bit of a push for the European places or not. LLL has a feeling the team may not have a choice in the matter, as their very excellent keeper, Miguel Ángel Moyá, is out for a month after a muscle tear picked up in training. Jordi Codina is set to be between the sticks, instead. “This is not a test for me, I don’t have to prove anything,” retorted the former Real Madrid man.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Pride in Spain as Del Bosque's side continue to deliver when it matters most

2013-03-27T10:43:00Z

It’s not often that La Liga Loca has the chance to be all fresh, brash and Rosie Pérez in White Men Can’t Jump with a huge, smug ‘told you so’. In fact, LLL has never previously had that opportunity. Recent posts predicted Barcelona to prevail in the Copa del Rey semi-final Clásicos, and for Real Madrid and Barça to be knocked out of the Champions League at the last 16 stage, although that was perhaps more wishful thinking inspired by the love of a quiet life.

But the vibe ahead of Tuesday’s World Cup qualifier between Spain and France was spot-on, with this very blog reminding you that the World and European champions have always thrown the odd wobbly before bouncing back when required with a gritty 1-0 win. Admittedly, that looked in doubt for a while in Paris, with Spain missing chances and Víctor Valdés busier than the Spanish media would care to remember, with the theme in the post-match reports being that it was a very deserved win.

The goal was a pleasing scrambled effort from Pedro and not “magnificent” as Marca’s match report claimed, and continued a fine international campaign for the Canary Islander, who has scored 10 goals this season for Spain. All in all, it was a Barça-based victory, with Valdés pulling off some fine stops at the other end of the pitch, and this has inspired some rare interest from the press in the Catalan capital.

“Pedro gives the World Cup a second chance” beamed Wednesday’s front cover of Sport. “Nobody can stop a national team that shows a praiseworthy concentration and absolute effort,” was Josep Maria Casanovas' response to a win that gives Spain a one-point lead in their group with three matches left. “Del Bosque can be proud of his men, they always deliver in tough moments.”

Mundo Deportivo are also holding back a tear or two, with Francesc Aguilar commenting that “it’s not that (Spain) want to die true to their style, but the opposite. They go out to win, as always, with the pride of Champions.”

AS are commendably political on Wednesday. Aside from the sufficiently boastful headline that “there’s a reason we are Champions”, editor Alfredo Relaño refers to the numerous corruption trials taking place in the country, including one involving the King’s son-in-law, Iñaki Urdangarín. “This land, swept up from north to south by ‘urdangarinatos’ that weaken us and depress us needed a moment of joy like this.”

“A dumbstruck Paris watched a display by the best national team on planet Earth,” reports Tomás Roncero. There was great love as well from the enormous Madridista to Víctor Valdés and the goalkeeper’s match-saving performance. “When the great Iker lifts the World Cup in 2014 [...] I will leave a space in my memory for the great saves of Valdés. Thanks, Víctor. Thanks, Spain.”

The mood in Spain is not so much relief - after all, previous experiences showed that Vicente del Bosque’s side delivers when it’s really, really, really necessary - but rather great pride. Despite the differences in the Spain camp between the players from The Big Two, it was a victory forged in La Masia (via the Canary Islands) but with crucial contributions from the Spanish capital and even Pamplona, with a solid display from Nacho Monreal. The country may be in a massive mess in every other department, but the football team keeps on rolling.

Forgotten history of near-misses and fumbles give Spain cause for positivity in Paris

2013-03-26T10:52:00Z

There’s some selective memory when it comes to the Spanish national team and their grand triumphs of recent years. In fact, it’s a mind wipe of science fiction proportions.

While it’s true La Selección are reigning World and European Champions, the paths to winning these prizes haven't exactly been ones the players have skipped merrily along, humming Barbie Girl while clutching baskets stuffed with rose petals.

There have been more than a couple of moments when Spain have royally stuffed things up and looked like mere mortals. However, over the five years since the first of their back-to-back-to-back tournament victories, Spain have managed to prevail whenever they’ve wandered into a footballing poop patch. History suggests Spain shall do so again in Tuesday night's 'crunch' World Cup qualifier against France in Paris.

In 2008, Spain drew 0-0 with Italy in the quarter-finals of the European Championships and were a penalty shoot-out away from being bottling dark horses, all over again. Vicente Del Bosque’s side lost their opening match of the 2010 World Cup to Switzerland in an encounter similar to Friday's underwhelming draw against Finland. Spain then won the title with narrow 1-0 victories in the knock-out stages against Portugal, Paraguay, Germany and Netherlands. The eventual triumph was well deserved, but it wasn't a case of a team sweeping away all before them. It was more grinding than galavanting.

Spain received another barrage of criticism for only drawing 1-1 with Italy in the group stages of Euro 2012, then again for needing a penalty shoot-out to squeeze past Portugal at the semi-final stage. They then creamed Italy in the final, one of the rare occasions that everything came together for the world's top-ranked side.

So when Sergio Ramos said on Monday that “football has no memory”, the Madrid defender was right, although he was referring to the way players must prove themselves again and again in the game, and that "the badge doesn’t win games". Ramos was also correct in his notion that, while Spain are repeated champions of everything, the voyage has never, ever been plain sailing and there have been plenty of slip-ups and wobbles along the way.

The Finland match was one of them. Although it may seem a little trite to say nobody would have raised an eyebrow at the Spanish showing had they won the game, this could certainly be said of Friday's match at Sporting’s El Molinón stadium. Yes, the performance was a touch below par and the players were wasteful in front of goal, but it was no different to many, many matches in which this Spain side have scraped victories without much comment.

The problem is that the reigning World Champions have always had to deal both with very high expectations and very cluttered memories of the recent past. It’s the same situation in 2013 with Finland and France.

Perhaps being at the top for so long has left Spain needing a bit of danger in their lives to truly get the football juices flowing. A victory in France would put Del Bosque’s side in control of their own destiny for the remaining three matches of the qualifying group. Anything less than three points will leave La Roja hoping France drop points away to Belarus and Georgia. While the situation could be worrying for Spain, it’s unlikely to be critical, with the handy safety net of the play-offs acting as a fallback.

History suggests that at least a draw is on the cards for Spain, given it’s been 20 years since they lost a World Cup qualifying fixture. This leaves the flag-waving sections of the Madrid-based press caught in two minds about the contest. While there is an attempt to lift the spirits ahead of the game - the cover of Tuesday's Marca shows the Eiffel Tower in the colours of the Spanish flag - there’s still not quite the same tension a World Cup knock-out match would have, with the knowledge that there’s a number of second chances for Del Bosque’s side should things go wrong in Paris. “This team has won a lot of games, many more difficult than this one,” notes the editorial in AS.

This qualifying phase for the 2014 World Cup is simply following the pattern of Spain’s journeys over recent years. Everyone tends to remember the glorious arrival and the trophy-lifting, but they turn a blind eye to the wrong-turns, comedic stumbles and furious throwing of the map out the car window along the way.

Michael Owen viewed with respect and regret at Real Madrid

2013-03-22T11:47:00Z

From a Spanish viewpoint, it appears that the news of Michael Owen’s impending retirement has been met with either ambivalence or hostility from Premier League fans – especially at Liverpool, Newcastle, Manchester United and Stoke, whose clubs he represented. But among Real Madrid supporters, there is a deep well of respect for a man who made 19 La Liga starts but still managed to score 13 goals.

Owen’s announcement made the Spanish sports pages as something of an aside. The then 24-year-old's single-season Santiago Bernabéu spell in 2004/05 was always an odd one.

There's a lot a confusion as to what the Englishman was doing in the Spanish capital in the first place, with Ronaldo and Raúl already hogging the prime roles in the Real Madrid forward line and almost impossible to displace. Then again, there’s a lack of understanding of why Owen decided to pack his bags just 383 days into a four-season deal, giving up on Real Madrid and moving to Newcastle.

Owen was always going to be the third choice up front, what with Ronaldo being the apple of Florentino Perez’s eye and Raúl being apple of his own eye as well as club captain and firm fan favourite, but the Englishman still delivered consistently for the team, whether from the start or by coming off the bench. “So many people thought he was very good, did his job very well and scored so many goals,” recalls Marca writer Rodrigo Marciel. “No one here has a bad word to say against him.”

On the other side of the fence: Owen and friends

But Owen didn't only struggle to make himself at home on the pitch: he also looked uncomfortable in the all-important area of relationships with the fans and media. Already in the footballing shadow of Raúl and Ronaldo, he also battled with comparisons to compatriot Steve McManaman off the field. To this day, the retired midfielder is adored by Real Madrid fans not only for what he achieved as a player, but also his spirit, good humour, adaptability to local customs, language skills and for never once complaining when on the bench or out of favour. “McManaman is a legend at Real Madrid,” says Rodrigo Marciel.

Through no fault of his own, Michael Owen was a very different personality to his former Liverpool team-mate – or even David Beckham, another Englishman still adored at the Santiago Bernabéu. The forward appeared shy, introverted and struggled to settle in the Spanish capital because “he missed his English life, that’s the key,” says Marciel.

This meant that there was no emotional connection between Owen and the Real Madrid supporters, something that may have helped the footballer adapt more successfully to his surroundings and perhaps have led to a longer spell in the Spanish capital. In a parallel universe there is a Michael Owen who spent three more years at Madrid, scoring 100 goals for the club.

However, a swift return to England was the future for Owen, whose one season spell in Spain was marked by undoubted success and unfulfilled potential. Despite this, Real Madrid’s home is one stadium where the retiring striker would receive a warm and respectful welcome, if tinged with regret of what might have been.

Mourinho hints at award scandal, as Benzema takes a vow of silence

2013-03-20T12:14:00Z

International breaks would be tremendously dull affairs were it not for footballers and managers shooting their mouths off, mindlessly ranting about how everything is rubbish and just not fair. La Liga Loca suspects many of them are well aware of the repercussions of these choice comments made away from the clutches of their respective club’s press officers.

José Mourinho certainly fell into that bracket when he told the Portuguese media the reasons he didn't travel to the FIFA Ballon d’Or awards in January, instead choosing to remain in Madrid. “Two or three people called me and said ‘I voted for you and the vote appeared for someone else’” revealed a mischievous Mourinho, who also admitted that perhaps his greatest pleasure at getting past Manchester United in the Champions League last 16 was that “a lot of people weren’t expecting it and were frustrated.”

“Where is he going with this,” asked Marca’s Wednesday editorial. “When he won in 2010, there were no complaints.”

Sergio Ramos was also feeling frustrated after the win in Manchester, but instead about the reaction of Mourinho, who claimed that “the best team lost”.

“I would have liked for him to have said something else,” Ramos sniffed during preparations for Spain’s double header against Finland and France.

The latter of those opponents are set to field Karim Benzema, who has caused a bit of a hullaballoo in his own country by admitting that he doesn’t bang out the country’s national anthem ahead of games. “I’ve never sung it in my life and I’m not going to now. Not doing it, won’t stop me from scoring a hat-trick,” noted Benzema quite reasonably. “If I score a lot of goals in a France game, nobody will ask if I sang La Marseillaise before.”

Although his comments drew criticism from France’s National Front party, he was backed by Michel Platini, who admited he also hadn’t one for a pre-match singalong back in the day. “It’s a war song and for me, a football match is a sporting event, not war,” revealed the UEFA president.

There was also a bit of bother in the Catalan capital, with Sandro Rosell telling children at a local school that “the fact that you speak Catalan, understand Catalan and are Barça fans in Catalonia, speaking Catalan is exactly what you should do, to show your feeling towards the club.”

Espanyol get a little touchy about Barça’s tendency to hog the big Catalan duvet, with club president Joan Collet responding that “no club has the exclusivity nor patent on Catalanism. There are a lot of Barça members who don’t speak Catalan and not everyone that does speak it is for Barça.”

Deportivo's Augusto Lendoiro was another club president who felt like having his say, this time in response to a fairly damning report from the administrators that details a €156 million debt and states that staying in business is “the least bad option” for Deportivo. Lendoiro clearly doesn’t do humility, and responded with the impeccable logic that the same people who got Deportivo into such a mess should be the ones to get it out again. “If someone can save the club it’s the current board. Who is going to know all this better than us?”

Lendoiro also challenged the size of the debt reported, saw the lack of evidence of any theft or impropriety at the club as “very important” and slammed the administrators for a perceived lack of communication. “There’s no relationship, I’ve asked to meet once a day (LLL suspects lunch was the idea for the chunky chieftain) but it’s too much to ask.”

It’s been a fine start to international week, and there's plenty more time for further mischief to be made.

Sorry Celta in a sticky spot, as rampant Real Sociedad march on

2013-03-18T11:34:00Z

FFT's man in Madrid, Tim Stannard, names the winners and losers of the weekend's La Liga action...

Good Day

Leo Messi & David Villa
It’s apparently happy families again at the Camp Nou, after Barça’s striking pair were all with the hugs and cuddles after three goals between the feuding forwards and assists aplenty in the 3-1 win against visiting Rayo Vallecano. “I’ve heard a lot of things, that there’s conflict (between the two), and it’s absurd,” charged Jordi Roura, who may have had his last experience on the Barça bench with Tito Vilanova possibly about to return. “I hope it’s my last game. It means Tito will be back,” said a probably very relieved Roura.

Real Madrid
If Madrid’s matches continue to be weird, Twin Peaks-style abstract affairs from now until the end of the season, then LLL may still keep paying attention, despite the title race being over. Real Madrid went behind twice to visitors Mallorca, once again showing a weakness when it comes to defending set-pieces, before coming away from the match with a 5-2 victory.

Luka Modric
The Croatian seems to be getting the hang of this la Liga business, and the former Spurs midfielder is starting to convince some of the doubters in the Spanish capital that the former he wasn’t a total rip-off with a price tag of around €35m.

Diego Costa
Not a spectacular performance from Atlético Madrid, but the 2-0 win at Osasuna was still an admirable result for the Rojiblancos, who owed the victory to a brace from Diego Costa. “I hope he can keep on getting better,” said Diego Simeone after the match, “he can improve a lot.”

Antoine Griezmann
La Liga Loca is now ready to declare that Champions League qualification is officially on for Real Sociedad. Oh yes. The Basque side’s 4-1 demolition of visiting Valladolid, inspired by their slightly nutty French winger, sees the team with just the single defeat from 18, and in fourth spot with a two point cushion over Valencia. “The fans dream but we are going forward with humility,” said la Real coach, Philipe Montanier, keeping things on the down-low (technically that means ‘secret’ but LLL likes the expression, anyway).

Valencia
A 3-0 win over Betis was perhaps a little flattering for Valencia, given their opponents were down to ten men after 14 minutes. A penalty from the foul committed on Roberto Soldado by Antonio Amaya which provoked the sending off, as well as a late own-goal and strike from Jonas was enough to overcome a Betis side that LLL is going to describe as plucky.

Luis García
Knowing Getafe, the toughest task for their coach is to come. The Madrid side has picked up 42 points with 10 matches to go, but García has a difficult challenge in trying to persuade his footballers to keep on motoring until the end of the season in case a European spot becomes available.
Saturday’s 1-0 win over Athletic Bilbao was another example of Getafe’s current efficiency, the kind that has produced 13 points from the last 15 and three clean sheets in a row. “They say Madrid are going for their tenth (European title), we are going for the tenth consecutive season in la Primera,” announced the Getafe manager, on a team who are pretty secure of achieving that goal with plenty of wiggle room to spare.

Sevilla
The Andalusian club are still in LLL’s bad books for being utterly limp once again all season, but a Good Day mention is warranted for a 4-0 victory over a hapless Zaragoza in the Sánchez Pizjuán. Sevilla are still six points from the European places though.

Levante
The 1-1 draw at Granada in the pouring rain moves Levante onto 37 points, although it does see the Valencia side without a win in la Liga in seven. It was a very handy point after the efforts in Moscow against Rubin Kazan on Thursday, given the fact many of the players were probably down in the dumps about the Europa League defeat.

Espanyol
A run of just one point from the previous three matches was ended by Espanyol, with a 2-0 victory against Málaga. “It was a very important step forward,” admitted a chirpy Perico boss, Javier Aguirre, after the clash.

Mallorca
The Balearic side may have lost 5-2 in the Bernabéu, but their two victories prior to that clash, along with the good form of Giovani dos Santos and Alejandro Alfaro, has convinced the blog that Mallorca will be staying up this season.

Deportivo
Despite an over-heated 3-1 win over Celta Vigo that saw insults hurled before the match - and a head-butt thrown during - Deportivo are still dead cert favourites to go down. The Riazor outfit still need in the region of 22 points to stay up. Nevertheless, Deportivo may have the very small consolation that they could be taking Celta down with them, thanks to this result.

Bad Day

Iago Aspas
If ever there was a moment when Celta were as good as down, it was Iago Aspas opting to dole out a head-butt to Carlos Marchena - who did make a bit of a meal of it, to be fair. That act of aggression contributed to an awful defeat to Deportivo and could see the side’s top striker and only hope of salvation out for up to four matches with a suspension. An apology on Twitter from the forward, which was forthcoming, isn’t going to fix that slight issue for his team.

Málaga
The league form for the southern side is still indifferent. Málaga’s home defeat to Espanyol gives Manuel Pellegrini’s side just two points from the past 12. However, the Champions League form of the battling team can forgive all domestic sins. “I hope we can fight on both fronts,” aspired the Málaga manager.

Pepe Mel
A tremendous “the refs have got us in for it” rant from the Betis boss after seeing Antonio Amaya sent off for a clip from behind on Roberto Soldado that may have been just outside the box, but only by millimeters and completely impossible to spot. “I feel like I’m being treated like an idiot,” fumed Mel who now has a couple of weeks to calm down.

Athletic Bilbao
“The defeat was fair, we couldn’t have asked for anything better,” was the admission from Athletic midfielder Ander Iturraspe, after a 1-0 away defeat at Getafe. The result sees the Bilbao side with just three wins from 14 on their travels this season.

Granada
The home clash against a tired Levante would be known as a six-pointer in England and a final in Spain. Either way, Granada fluffed their lines completely in a 1-1 draw to leave the Andalusian side without a win in five. “We lacked clarity and precision,” complained manager, Lucas Alcaraz.

Manolo Jiménez
The Zaragoza boss is in charge of an almighty mess at the moment. The players lack discipline to stay on the pitch for the whole 90 minutes - the Sevilla defeat saw another deserved sending off - and the team is still without a victory in 2013, a run of 11 league matches. All that Jiménez could do though was moan a bit about the referees in fine la Liga tradition. “It was a match until the sending-off,” complained the Zaragoza boss.

Rayo's Iron Men head to Camp Nou, as Madrid’s stars get pulled over

2013-03-15T10:16:00Z

Friday

Deportivo (20th) v Celta Vigo (19th) - 21.45 (all kick-offs local time)
Friday night sees the first of seven matches Deportivo coach Fernando Vázquez claims must be won if his side are to stay up. And of course, it’s with delicious irony that the game is against one of the manager’s former sides and local rivals, Celta Vigo, who are also in a spot of bother in the bottom three. The tough talking has already begun, with Celta striker Iago Aspas predicting in a surprisingly assertive manner for a footballer that “if we beat them, then we will leave Deportivo with two feet in the Segunda.”
Meanwhile, the Deportivo boss had to explain why Riki, who admittedly has been carrying a knock, didn't make it on the Barcelona trip, last weekend. “Leaving him out was a bit of an economic decision, had I been allowed to travel with 19, then he would have come,” said Vázquez on a club that is now struggling to fund away trips by the sounds of it. La Liga Loca suggests the striker could have slept in his car. After all, Ever Banega does it all the time...
LLL Prediction - Home win

Saturday

Real Sociedad (5th) v Valladolid (11th) - 16.00
Still no word on the possible contract renewal of la Real coach Philippe Montanier, who has put his side into proper contention for the Champions League places. The French manager spoke to Marca after last week’s win at Atlético Madrid, and discussed those fans and writers in the local media who have been wanting him out from the off. “There’s a lot of passion around football, so people have an opinion on everything,” noted a nonchalant Montanier. “I’ve very happy though, what’s more I’ve asked the Federation if it’s possible to end the league now but they said they can’t,” chuckled the Real Sociedad boss, making zee joke.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Getafe (9th) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) - 18.00
It’s still a jolt to see Athletic Bilbao doing so poorly this season, which is why the blog was caught off guard by Ander Herrera's claim that there was still all to play for in la Liga with 11 games left. But instead of looking upwards to a late, late European charge following back-to-back league wins, the Athletic midfielder is looking down between his legs at the tiled bathroom floor of football.
“We are confident but not relaxed,” claimed Herrera, with his side on 32 points. “Those who relax find it tough at the end. To avoid a tense end to the league, the first test of the season is on Saturday and Getafe.” By coincidence, Athletic are visiting the most relaxed team in Spain - too many points to go down, but not enough porridge in the tank to make Europe.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Real Madrid (2nd) v Mallorca (18th) - 20.00
A supremely jealous LLL loves an ‘entitled footballer getting his comeuppance’ story, so has delighted in a string of incidents involving Real Madrid players getting caught by the fuzz in one of the few areas they are mere mortals - on the roads. Marcelo, Mesut Özil and Karim Benzema have all been pulled over in recent times. Marcelo was caught driving without a valid license, Benzema was caught speeding, while Özil was fined €500 after he was spotted performing an illegal turn.
This is why the blog loved a delicious story in AS on Thursday which took note of the footballers’ driving skills when leaving the training complex day before. The journalist noted that Coentrao was driving whilst talking on his mobile (€200 fine and three penalty points), while fast-living Frenchman Benzema took a roundabout too quickly, causing another car to break so as not to hit him (€200 and four penalty points). Long may this vigilance from AS continue, perhaps by watching the Reliant Robins speeding away from the Rayo training facilities.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia (7th) v Betis (6th) - 22.00
One decent fixture in a round of la Primera is a luxury, but two is a cup-cake stuffed treat. The other top encounter is the Galician derby, however this match-up between two Champions League contenders could be a tasty affair too. Ignoring the fact the result is largely insignificant to the futures of either team with 11 games to play, Valencia's Adil Rami has jumped on board the 'Final' bus by declaring the match-up in Mestalla to be “the final of the season”. The defender adds that his side will play “a lot of finals” from now until the end of the campaign.
Aside from all the finals to come, the other topic of conversation in Mestalla continues to be the non-contract renewal of Ernesto Valverde. Rami says that he hopes the manager stays on beyond June because “we have had a (bleeping) good revival, so why are we going to change a winning team?”
Because it’s Valencia, my friend, because it’s Valencia.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Málaga (4th) v Espanyol (13th) - 12.00
The actor may have spent much of the evening agreeing to hundreds of photograph requests from fans, but Antonio Banderas still had a top time in the stands of la Rosaleda on Wednesday. The Málaga born-and-bred star of Spy Kids and other cinematic treats was in town to see his beloved home side (although Banderas also has a leaning towards Real Madrid) triumph against Porto in the Champions League. “The city deserves this,” said the local lad told radio station Cadena Ser. “We are suffering even more from the crisis in Spain. This can’t fix everything but it adds a bit of cream to life.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sevilla (12th) v Zaragoza (13th) - 17.00
The latest scapegoat for Sevilla's slide towards hopelessness over the last few years is Sporting Director, Monchi, who appears to have lost the golden touch that brought in the likes of Luis Fabiano, Dani Alves, Seydou Keita and Freddie Kanouté. However, each of the many managers to depart the Sánchez Pizjuán has been quick to praise Monchi, and current coach Unai Emery has added to the love. “His credit is so big here, that there can’t be any doubt in him,” said Unai. “What’s happening now is that there is tremendous competition in signings between teams and competing markets which gives you less options.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Osasuna (15th) v Atlético Madrid (3rd) - 17.00
A torn soul for LLL on Sunday. The blog has a huge squishy spot for Osasuna, and the Primera needs the pugilistic Pamplona side in its ranks forever. Then again, LLL doesn’t want to see Atlético fade and burn out after an extraordinary campaign so far. The Rojiblancos have picked up just the single point from the past two games, a run which has coincided with a slow spell from Falcao who has just the single strike from open play in four league matches.
At least away fan favourite Diego Costa is about to put in a shift of elbow grease and elbow throws. In fact, Osasuna defender Alejandro Arribas believes he is currently more important that his failing forward partner, Falcao. “He’s vital for any team he plays in. I’d want him with me, always, he’s always making jokes, laughing,” recalled the centre-back, who was with the Brazilian last season at Rayo. He’s nothing like he is out on the field. That’s his way of playing and I love it.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Granada (16th) v Levante (10th) - 21.00
La Liga Loca is hoping the Levante players were given all the beer and pizza they could manage on the long flight back from Moscow on Thursday night. The Spanish side held out for 120 minutes against the richer, mightier Rubin Kazan, before succumbing to two extra time efforts from the Russians. It was a fine adventure indeed for Levante, in week that has been a touch troubled, first with the departure of Obafemi Martins, potentially to MLS, and now with their fond farewell to Europe. “It’s a shame the dream is over,” admitted Levante coach, Juan Ignacio Martínez.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Rayo Vallecano (8th) - 21.00
Rayo are going to have ‘Iron Man 3’ on their shirts for the visit to the Camp Nou, in a continuation of their Marvel films link, which saw mascots dressed as Thor and Hulk to promote last year’s release of Avengers. Now if Robert Downey Junior turned up for the match and even got to play a bit, that would perhaps be the greatest moment in la Liga history.
On to more serious topics, and Rayo are currently working on the renewal of the contract of coach Paco Jémez, with his current deal set to expire at the end of the season. Sporting Director Felipe Miñambres says that “it’s difficult to take conclusions from just one meeting.”
The matter is complicated perhaps, by the fact that Miñambres himself is also out of contract this summer, but he says that “I want to carry on and the club is happy with me.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barça secure an easy passage but Málaga look set for a rough ride

2013-03-13T10:37:00Z

It only took a few seconds for pundits to begin pondering how Barcelona had managed to pull off a comprehensive 4-0 Champions League victory over AC Milan.

Was it a pre-match talk to the players from Tito Vilanova? Was it David Villa playing up front, with Leo Messi behind? Or was it simply the fact that the Barça players couldn’t stand the notion of being asked endless questions on whether a last 16 European knock-out would properly, definitely, completely, totally signify the infamous ‘end of a cycle’ for the club?

La Liga Loca plumps for the latter, as this was the narrative being planned in Capital City before Barcelona kicked-off the second leg with a two-goal deficit. Primera medical men in Madrid have been hovering over the Camp Nou club for some time, waiting for the moment they could soberly call time on their rival’s golden generation - probably missing out the “why did it have to be on my watch?” (LLL has been watching too much ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ of late). However, Tuesday’s result sees them having to go back to their consulting rooms to wait a little longer.

The delight and relief in the Catalan press is understandable, with Sport's Josep Maria Casanovas oozing over “the perfect game. The dream comeback. An unforgettable night. A five star Barça. A goal-fest that shut a lot of mouths."

Meanwhile, Mundo Deportivo’s front cover blasts “what a night!” with a photograph of a chuffed-looking David Villa seconds after scoring Barça’s third and definitive goal of the night.

Even the Madrid papers make an effort to look pleased for Barcelona, but perhaps in the manner of someone congratulating a colleague on winning a promotion instead of them. Marca’s trumpets “Barça’s return” and says that “now you have your epic comeback.”

“The sticker collection of the best Barça in history is complete,” notes the paper’s match report on the Camp Nou affair.

“This Barça now has the comeback that Xavi demanded. It began with the appearance of Piqué with a true leader’s message, it continued with a fast goal from Messi and was completed by a counter-attack ended by Jordi Alba,” writes AS editor, Alfredo Relaño, who also adds a truly chilling thought to rattle LLL’s bones. “There are new Clásicos on the horizon.”

On Wednesday night, the almost overlooked Málaga will be hoping to become the third Spanish side to enter Friday’s quarter-final draw, with a bit of a tense affair against Porto. The Portuguese side lead 1-0 from the first leg, but Málaga do have the ability to make sure the disadvantage doesn't widen, with the southern side possessing the second best defence in la Primera. The downside is that Málaga have only scored one measly goal since the Porto first leg, and that strike was a header from a free-kick, so not exactly from open play. “We have to think that every ball could see the game won or lost,” warned manager Manuel Pellegrini.

While Barça’s passage to the quarters turned out to be a nice smooth plop, LLL suspects Málaga’s evening may involve grunting, groaning and the odd alarming smell. However, while the Camp Nou clash may have been entertaining, if not exactly epic, the blog predicts penalties and Málaga through to the last eight.*

*In the past weeks, LLL has been wrong about Real Madrid going through to the Copa del Rey final, beating Barça in la Liga and Barça beating Milan.

Barça's Twittering 12th man may not be enough against Milan

2013-03-12T11:31:00Z

While Pep Guardiola is busy breaking in his Lederhosen and learning about the madness of dative and accusative prepositions as the future Bayern Munich boss, the Catalan may be feeling a very small sense of pleasure at Barcelona's current plight.

Their iffy run of form may have ran over only a few weeks, but it feels like years thanks to the intense scrutiny it has received. It's a dip that thumbs a nose and chin at the suggestion anyone can rule the talented giants.

It's as though a team talk of "Messi, score; Xavi, pass the ball; Alves, irritate everyone; Iniesta, dribble a bit and remember your sunblock; Valdés? Valdés, smash" would get the job done week in, week out.

Barça players and Jordi Roura have openly admitted that Tito Vilanova's temporary absence has been noted and will be once again on Tuesday night, despite watching from New York and being involved in all the decisions both before and after the Milan match. Barça have to turn around a 2-0 deficit against the Serie A side and a large chunk of discussion on Spain's various sports radio stations over the past few days has been dominated by the same theme - scoring at one end won't be the issue, it's not conceding any at the other that could be.

Another stress point in the Culé camp ahead of Tuesday concerns the behaviour of the Camp Nou fans, with Gerard Piqué admitting on Monday that they can be a pessimistic bunch. "We need 90,000 who believe we can do this," barked the defender. "Anyone who doesn't believe can leave their ticket with a friend or give up their seat." Barcelona-based Sport are recruiting their own 12th man to help the home side out in the last 16 tie - El Twitterazo, with the paper's front page calling on fans to use a comeback hashtag to help the team out. Things are that bad, it seems.

Looking at LLL's own Twitter account, #remontada isn't a top trend in Spain, but 'Splash2' is, making the blog wonder if a Mermaid-based comedy sequel was finally in the offing. It turns out one has been produced already - straight to video - and that this particular Splash2 was something to do with computers.

But staying on operation Red Leader, the paper publishes a wonderful column by the increasingly batty Josep Maria Casanovas on what he would do if he were Leo Messi, Xavi and Piqué. And no it doesn't involve leaving the Camp Nou with Shakira before the game had even started, which is where the blog's imagination first went. "If I were the team psychologist I would drug them," writes the Sport columnist, "with desire and confidence. And If I were Mourinho I wouldn't watch the game to avoid a huge a disappointment," he chuckles.

Mundo Deportivo aren't allowing a single shred of self doubt to creep into their hive mind either, with J.M. Artells suggesting that fans will be positively giddy with excitement at the prospect of being terrified by every Milan attack. "The supporters sense an epic and tonight they will be unconditionally behind their heroes." Especially after that warning from Piqué, we suspect.

The Madrid papers are rubbing their hands in glee at the thought of Barcelona going out at the last 16 stage, a whole round before their own side's probable quarter-final demolition by Bayern Munich. AS will be peering at the Camp Nou closely, with their front cover predicting either "a comeback or a change of cycle," despite the fact their own side is currently 13 points behind the Catalan club in the domestic league table. "Milan was not an accident, but a symptom confirmed in the games against Madrid and even in the last one against Depor,” writes Alfredo Relaño in the paper's leader. “Suddenly the team has stopped.”

La Liga Loca's own prediction powers, which brilliantly featured Madrid losing out to Barça in the Copa del Rey and then to Manchester United, sees the initiative of a Twitter campaign as too little, too late for the Catalans. While the blog feels that the game will be won by Barcelona, Milan will do enough to secure a spot in the next round.

Keepers on top in La Liga, as La Real keep rolling into Champions League contention

2013-03-11T12:00:00Z

FourFourTwo's man in Madrid, Tim Stannard, wades through the weekend's La Liga action and separates the good and bad...

RESULTS Fri 8 Mar Real Betis 2-1 Osasuna Sat 9 Mar Rayo Vallecano 2-0 Espanyol, Real Valladolid 1-1 Malaga, Barcelona 2-0 Deportivo, Mallorca 2-1 Sevilla Sun 10 Mar Athletic Bilbao 1-0 Valencia, Levante 0-0 Getafe, Celta Vigo 1-2 Real Madrid, Atletico Madrid 0-1 Real Sociedad.

Good Day

José Manuel Pinto
It wasn't exactly a dazzling display from Barça against Deportivo, with a number of starters observing the kick-off from the comfort of the bench with Milan in mind, but the 2-0 win brought three more points and a first clean sheet in two months. Blog hero, José Manuel Pinto, began a four match residence between the sticks due to potty-mouthed Víctor Valdés' suspension, while Leo Messi came off the bench to find the net for the 17th league games in a row.

Cristiano Ronaldo
The Madrid man will continue to make the front covers of the local papers while the forward is the only one scoring. The 2-1 away win at Celta - inspired by a brace from Ronaldo - reflects the fact that Real Madrid’s dubious away day sickness has finally been cured. It also puts the side into second place, above Atlético Madrid, for good measure.

Thibaut Courtois
The Atletico Madrid keeper, on loan from Chelsea, broke current Celta Vigo boss Abel Resino's La Liga record of 800 unbeaten minutes between the sticks, a target set in the 1990-91 campaign. The new record now stands at 820 minutes, with Courtois now on 37 since Sociedad's Xabi Prieto scored the only goal on Sunday's shock away victory.

Málaga
Tough to know where to plonk Málaga this weekend, but Manuel Pellegrini seemed happy enough with the point at Valladolid, and who is LLL to disagree? The main concern, though, will be the continued lack of goals from the forward line, with Málaga’s opener coming from the head of Martín Demichelis after a free-kick. Valencia’s loss at Athletic Bilbao a day later also helped Málaga along the way too. After all, they just have the league to focus on soon, if things don’t go to plan against Porto during the week.

Philippe Montanier
Moving Real Sociedad into Champions League contention by beating Atlético Madrid still isn’t good enough for the club’s president, Jokin Aperribay. “Montanier’s renovation doesn’t depend on results,” said the Basque bigwig, whose side have lost just a single game in the past 17, a 4-3 defeat against Real Madrid in the Santiago Bernabéu.

Pepe Mel
The Betis coach has been nothing but consistent this season, insisting all along that the first priority for the club is avoiding relegation. A 2-1 home win over Osasuna on Friday night took them to 43 points, meaning it's mission all but accomplished for Betis. Pepe Mel beamed that “today, on 8th March, we have achieved our objective. We are the only team in la Liga that can say that today.” La Liga Loca disagrees, and suspects that at the back of every Atlético Madrid fan’s mind, there’s a finish line marked ’42 points’.

Rayo Vallecano
La Liga Loca will be delighted to write every week from this point onwards that the blog was completely wrong in predicting relegation for Rayo. Then again, a number of Rayo fans also feared the worst following the departures of Diego Costa and Michu, are therefore in the same word-eating boat. The 2-0 victory over Espanyol in Vallecas on Saturday afternoon gave Rayo 41 points - almost, almost, almost over the finishing line for survival. Almost.

Levante
The goalless draw with Getafe looks like a typical post-Europe hangover, but it’s a match that Levante were very unlucky not to win. Unfortunately though, it does leave the Valencia side with just the single win from nine matches.

Valladolid
La Liga’s stealth team keep on squeezing out points to carry them towards safety. Valladolid only have the single win from seven games but four of those results have been draws. The latest was a 1-1 at home to Málaga and leaves Valladolid on 35 and coach, Miroslav Djukic, happy with the “positive dynamic” of the team.

Alejandro Alfaro
Two pouncing efforts from shots bouncing off the post and goalkeeper brought about a 2-0 against the Mallorca striker's former club, Sevilla. “We are still in the danger zone, so our heads aren’t in the clouds,” said Gregorio Manzano, who claims his job in recent weeks has merely been to restore morale to the players. It seems to be working for Mallorca, who even had a crowd watching them on Saturday night.

Iker Muniain
One of the disappointments of the season in la Liga scores his first goal in the division since October 2011 in a 1-0 win over visiting Valencia, a game in which Athletic rode their luck a little. “Once I said the team had 20 points less than it deserved. In relation to the last games I would say we had 14 less as in the past two matches, the results have been in our favour,” admitted the ever wonderful Marcelo Bielsa, referencing last week’s away win at Osasuna.

Bad Day

Atlético Madrid
A bit of a flat atmosphere at a chilly Vicente Calderón on Sunday evening was matched by a far from hot Atlético performance, which saw a winning run of 14 league matches at home broken by Real Sociedad. “We had the intention, but without the clarity,” admitted Diego Simeone after a loss which came ironically (LLL thinks) after the side’s first midweek rest since the second round of the season.

Roberto Soldado
La Liga Loca will forever have reservations in regards to Soldado due to the forward blowing chances over the bar from one metre, an effort that cost Valencia a deserved point in San Mamés.

Sevilla
Sevilla would be relegated if such things were based purely on away form (big thanks to an egg-head at Marca for bringing that fact to LLL’s attention). Saturday’s loss to Mallorca was Sevilla’s ninth away defeat of a campaign that sees just the single win from 14 on the road. And that was against Deportivo, so doesn’t really count. “The stats away from Sevilla have been poor for a while,” admitted Unai Emery, “but I keep believing in the team. Today we lost a final, but there are more to come and we have to pick ourselves up.” Yet more ‘final’ abuse from the Sevilla boss.

Espanyol
This is now a bit of a slump for the Pericos under the previously imperious Javier Aguirre with just one point from the last nine. Espanyol will still be as safe as a safe thing come the end of the season, but the talk of Europe a few weeks ago was clearly a little premature.

Osasuna
Topsy-turvy form at the moment from Osasuna, who followed back-to-back wins with back-to-back defeats to losses to Athletic and Betis. On the plus side for the Pamplona outfit, Osasuna did score a fine Real Madrid-style counter-attacking effort in the 2-1 defeat, a far cry from the team’s normal more no frills, find your own seats, direct approach.

Deportivo
Nothing unexpected happened to Depor this weekend, as they suffered defeat at the Camp Nou. So it’s just as desperate a situation after the fixture as it was before, with the bottom-of-the-table side stuck on 17 points. “We have to win seven of our final 11 games as a minimum,” said manager, Fernando Vazquez. That probably isn’t going to happen.

Missing midfielders, a Copa del Rey conundrum and Simeone stays on

2013-03-08T11:40:00Z

Our man in Madrid Tim Stannard previews the weekend in La Primera…

FRIDAY

Real Betis (7th) v Osasuna (15th) – 21.30
There's been quite the saga with Betis midfielder Nosa Igiebor, who was lucky enough to form part of Nigeria’s Africa Cup of Nations-winning squad. Trouble is, he's yet to return to Seville, nearly a month after the tournament finished. Nosa blames paperwork snarl-ups and bureaucracy issues that have prevented the Spanish embassy in Lagos from issuing a visa.

Back in Andalusia, an increasingly perplexed and irate Betis have been trying to find out what the big hold-up is with Nosa. Club director Bosch Valero hinted this week that the issue might be with the footballer himself, claiming that “he had other priorities and now we are paying for it.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

SATURDAY

Rayo Vallecano (9th) v Espanyol (13th) – 16.00
Expect this match to feature even bigger protests against the Rayo board and president – the type of activity that may well have got some of the club’s Bukanero ultras into trouble in the first place. At the end of February, 13 Rayo fans were arrested, reportedly in relation to the floodlight-cutting incident from the Real Madrid game earlier in the season.

Madrid regional government spokesperson Cristina Cifuentes tweeted that the arrests were made after an official complaint were made by Rayo’s board. But the Rayo bigwigs, understandably wanting a quiet life, quickly denied this with a statement “deeply regretting the misunderstanding.” LLL suspects that the Rayo massive doesn’t believe a word of this… and that the ongoing spat between the supporters and the Rayo bosses will go up a gear against Espanyol.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Real Valladolid (12th ) v Málaga (4th) – 18.00
This particular match screams goalless draw so loudly that it can be heard from Moscow, so it’s onto more interesting fare and the question of which Málaga footballer will be the next to be sold. Isco has always been LLL’s bet and it’s an opinion shared by Martín Demichelis: “Personally, I think that the one to leave in the short term is Isco.”

Indeed the Argentinian defender might join the playmaker in rushing for the door: “[River Plate] know that Javier Saviola and I are free at the end of the season, and they’ve let us know that they want us to go there," announced Demichelis chirpily, before hurriedly adding "I’ve never said that I would go to River and nor do I have a pre-contract or anything similar.”
LLL Prediction – GOALLESS DRAW

Barcelona (1st) v Deportivo (20th) – 20.00
Despite Barça experiencing a Freaky Friday-style teen-movie body-swap moment with Mallorca, it’s still not going to impact the result of this particular match between the sides at the top and the bottom of the table. But in Galicia, the news is not footballing but financial. When Deportivo went into administration in January, president Augusto Lendoiro declared the debt to be around €93m, with €40m of that figure owed to the taxman.

It seems that Lendoiro’s accounting may be even worse than suspected, with Spain’s tax office declaring that they're owed €93m themselves and the club’s administrators reporting that the overall debt is in the region of €156m – a truly stunning amount, if it is indeed correct. To suggest that this is the last-ever visit of Deportivo in its current form to the Camp Nou is no exaggeration, such is the trouble the institution is in should it go down into la Segunda – as looks increasingly likely.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Mallorca (19th) v Sevilla (10th) – 22.00
Victory at Granada has given Mallorca some hope of survival being feasible, and it all starts with a home match against Sevilla. Now, filling the Iberostar is a tough ask at the best of times, but especially so late on a Saturday night – which is why the club have launched a number of initiatives to get bums on seats this weekend.

Season ticket holders will get one free ticket for the match, along with an offer to buy last season’s club shirt for €10 until stocks run out. “On Saturday against Sevilla, we're going to paint the stadium red!” yells Mallorca’s website, optimistically.
LLL Prediction – Away win

SUNDAY

Athletic Bilbao (14th) v Valencia (5th) – 12.00
Valencia’s expulsion from the Champions League stages at the last 16 stages (again) gives the club and Ernesto Valverde a bit of time to work on that pesky contract renewal, though LLL suspects it’s the coach holding things up with Athletic Bilbao still sniffing about.

The club are going to need a new grumpy central midfielder too, with David Albelda off on his travels over the summer too. “It looks like that was my last Champions League game,” announced the Golden Oldie in Paris, dropping a hint on a free transfer to the Emirates perhaps.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Levante (11th) v Getafe (8th) – 17.00
Now LLL must admit that it hasn’t seen the video evidence to see if tongue was in cheek, but the mayor of Getafe has offered up the 17,000-capacity Coliseum as a possible venue for May’s Copa del Rey final between Atlético Madrid and Real Madrid. The town council reported to the Spanish FA that the venue is “apt” because it is a neutral ground for a Madrid derby. “The people of Getafe would be proud of celebrating a Copa del Rey final in our town, with two neighbouring sides,” said mayor Juan Soler. If only...
LLL Prediction – Home win

Celta Vigo (18th) v Real Madrid (3rd) – 19.00
Sorry. After two Clásicos and Manchester United, LLL can only bear to write the words ‘Real Madrid’ one more time. Oops. So, Celta Vigo: probably going down, hopefully staying up and all that, but the hot topic around the Galicians is whether Celta’s former Chelsea footnote Quique De Lucas was having a beer whilst sat on the bench in last week’s defeat to Sevilla.

LLL Prediction – Away win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Real Sociedad (6th) – 21.00
The Rojiblancos took advantage of their first free midweek in the league calendar since the second round to do some housekeeping. The main task in hand was to pin down Diego Simeone – not literally, that would be dangerous – to a new contract. It was job done on Wednesday with the Argentinian signing on at the Vicente Calderón, albeit with clauses allowing both parties to do away with each other at the appropriate moment.

At a press conference under the banner ‘Simeone 2017’, the Atlético boss was in philosophical, film-trailer mood promising that “we’ll keep building match by match, growing one step at a time and not getting lost in success, because it’s difficult to keep balance with success.” LLL expects a bit of table-thumping performance on Sunday night.
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY

Real Zaragoza (17th) v Granada (16th) – 20.30
Zaragoza have quietly caved in since the start of the year: they're the only team in la Primera without a victory in 2013. The loss at Getafe last weekend was Zaragoza’s sixth defeat since the winter break and had coach Manolo Jiménez ranting about wanting players in his side with big enough stones for the relegation battle side the club now faces.

Opponents Granada are also in iffy form, despite an initial revival under Lucas Alcaraz. The Andalusians have lost the past three league games 2-1 and are set to be without Carlos Aranda for the clash; picking the striker, who moved from Zaragoza over the winter window, would trigger an extra payment of €250,000 – an example of what is known in Spain as “the clause of fear”.
LLL Prediction – Home win (2-1)

Madrid’s assistance at Old Trafford sends Barcelona press potty

2013-03-06T11:30:00Z

“What do I think? Madrid fans, they are blind! Blind I tell you!” was the damning verdict from the blog’s Atlético-supporting café owner early on Wednesday morning. He was not best pleased at the prospect of Real Madrid winning their 10th European title, the dream of dreams of dreams in the Spanish capital.

While the grumpy old codger might have been a little biased in his opinion it was a verdict shared by José Mourinho himself who, to his personal delight, bamboozled all by admitting Nani’s red was only a yellow, that he was “expecting more from his side” and that “the best team didn’t go through”.

In the UK such flattery has been interpreted as a blatant kiss-up to Manchester United, a club he fancies managing in the future. But La Liga Loca suspects it’s just another way to annoy Florentino Pérez and knock gloss off a hugely important result that prevented many a nervous breakdown in the Madridista world.

Yes, Saturday’s victory against Barcelona should have been a draw after a late penalty claim was ignored by the referee. Yes, Nani’s red card certainly changed a match where Madrid were labouring when handed possession by Manchester United. And yes, the Madrid press are quite happy to ignore all these decisions going in the club’s favour, something that will be overlooked completely at a later date if there’s an unfortunate call that has the papers calling conspiracy.

"So this means Fergie's on his way out, right?"

Over in the Catalan capital, the result has been predictably labelled a jammy Real Madrid progression to the quarter-finals. Sport’s Joan Batlle snooted that “Madrid ended up suffering against 10, relying on a saving angel, Diego López, to avoid a historic humiliation.” Mundo Deportivo are equally as irked with J.M Artells furious that “the referee threw life jackets to a Madrid that was on the way to being shipwrecked.”

No such pinkie talk in the Spanish capital, though. Marca’s in-house referee may have confessed that the Nani red card was a mistake, but their front page declared that Madrid had “the heart of a champion”. Even Cristiano Ronaldo admitted too many tingly feelings. “For the first time in my career the atmosphere got the better of me,” chirped the returning match winner.

AS are a little more cagey and merely declare what a great week it’s been. “The clouds have parted and now the sun shines for Real Madrid, as today they don’t need to be envious of anyone,” writes Alfredo Relaño.

Tomás Roncero injects a little bit more enthusiasm into the affair, declaring “eternal glory for the best team in the history” and that it was Madrid who lost out to the referee’s performance. “He allowed the 1-0 despite the offside from Van Persie and forgave the red and penalty for Rafael. To compare all this with the Nani sending-off feels and wrong and unfair to me.”

With a huge sigh of relief, LLL now turns its fairly narrow attention to Valencia’s attempts to overturn a 2-1 deficit against Paris Saint-Germain in the French capital.

Although Zlatan Ibrahimovic is missing through suspension, the Swede’s absence is countered by Valencia’s lack of first choice centre-back pairing, Ricardo Costa and Adil Rami.

Roberto Soldado says Los Che will be going into the match with “nothing to lose” (apart from the tie, perhaps), while manager Ernesto Valverde is confident he has a plan that could see his side prevail. “The same strategy (as the Mestalla first leg), but not conceding goals.” Crazy, but it might just work.

Real Madrid desperate for Devilish Ronaldo at Old Trafford – or it's season over

2013-03-05T11:46:00Z

La Liga Loca suspects that Cristiano Ronaldo will be a very happy millionaire megastar on Wednesday morning, irrespective of the result between Manchester United and Real Madrid.

Not only will Ronaldo be clicking on the ‘check balance’ button at the cashpoint – a twice-weekly treat – but he will know that it will be at least a season before he is asked never-ending questions about what Manchester United and Sir Alex Ferguson mean to him. “I hated every miserable, damp second I spent in England and that man was a tyrant,” was the response the blog got from the Madrid man the other day, but hasn’t got around to filing it yet. Doubt anyone would be interested, really.

Ronaldo is on the front cover of Tuesday’s Marca, running through the Old Trafford tunnel with some iffy health-and-safety issues and very much on fire.

Marca scoffs at the very notion of ‘Red Devils’, claiming that the real devil is “dressed in white and is called Cristiano.” It’s a fine conceit, if somewhat ruined a couple of pages later with the admission that Madrid may well be wearing green to avoid a clash with the home side's shorts.

Perhaps rather than the Tunnel Of Fire, Marca could have mocked up a picture of Ronaldo carrying the entire Madrid team on his back, perhaps in some kind of giant holdall with Kaká’s head poking out. It would have been more appropriate, such are the hopes and expectations that Ronaldo can lead Madrid through a tie which is impossible to predict.

AS also have Ronaldo on Tuesday’s front cover, claiming that tonight's tie is a “Match of Dreams” with editor Alfredo Relaño gurgling over a footballer who is a now “an adult player, powerful, a goalscorer, sensational. A formidable enemy for the team that formed him.”

The mood in Spain’s capital city is an odd one. The euphoria and confidence of the double defeat of Barcelona has certainly reminded fans that the Madrid players are still capable of turning it on when motivated sufficiently. However, the English outfit and the much-revered Sir Alex Ferguson are certainly causing concern in a game which everyone expects to be a belter with an uncertain outcome.

While José Mourinho claimed during Monday’s press conference that “I wouldn't cry if we lose or run 100 metres with my finger in the air if we win,” the sentiment isn't shared elsewhere at the Bernabeu. Every single poker chip the club possesses is being plonked onto the Old Trafford pitch, in an effort to stop the Spanish side's season being a complete wash-out.

Prevail, and Madrid still have a tough journey to Wembley, but it means the side is alive and kicking and still chasing the cherished decima – the self-mythologising 10th European Cup/Champions League title. Fail, and Madrid will be out of the Champions League (at the last 16, for the seventh time in nine seasons), 13 points behind Barcelona in la Primera with the prospect of dead league fixtures against the likes of Celta Vigo, Levante and Valladolid. Even a Copa del Rey final against Atlético Madrid won’t seem as exciting as it did after last week's win over Barcelona.

Tuesday's pre-match talk in Madrid may be of a “Match of Dreams”, but losing to United could well be a teeth-falling-out, not-studying-for-an-exam, trouserless-in-public, Alan-Shearer-with-a-slide-projector nightmare.

Another Bad Day for Barça as Espanyol enjoy an amorous afternoon

2013-03-04T11:45:00Z

Good Day

José Manuel Pinto
The much-maligned Barça goalkeeper could well be a busy bee for a couple of la Liga games, after a classic Víctor Valdés meltdown saw 'the short-tempered one' yelling unmentionables at the referee following Saturday’s Clásico clash. The Madrid press are busy tutting and shaking their heads over the incident, although “you have no shame” - one of the comments Valdés is accused of aiming at the official - is exactly what José Mourinho’s assistant, Rui Faria, yelled at the same referee after a recent Valencia Copa del Rey clash. Certainly not suggesting any hypocrisy or short memories here...

Atlético Madrid
A tough call, with both Atlético and Málaga probably fairly happy with a goalless draw, but the Rojiblancos grabbed a tough point in Andalusia four days after a challenging Copa del Rey semi-final victory in Andalusia. But Málaga will be a tad concerned that they haven’t scored in the past three games - with Porto, Betis and now Atlético able to keep them at bay.

Real Madrid
This is getting very confusing. Technically speaking, Barça are still 13 points ahead of Madrid, and should be all with the ‘so-what’ after a defeat at the Santiago Bernabéu. Instead, the records show that a Real Madrid ‘reserve’ team - featuring cheapie cast-offs such as Kaká, Karim Benzema and Luka Modric - beat a fully loaded Barça to make it just one defeat in the past eight matches.
The daylight encounter was a largely sluggish affair, mirroring the fact that the sixth Clásico of the season was the least important match of the Primera round in terms of league position. But a late goal from Sergio Ramos and a rather controversial decision to deny Alexis Sánchez a penalty gave Real Madrid the victory and denied Barça the opportunity to pick up a point.
While Real Madrid can certainly be encouraged by two wins over Barça in five days, there’s a big ‘Careful Now!’ sign ahead, with Manchester United considerably more competent that Barcelona at present. Tuesday night could see Madrid 13 points behind their Catalan rivals with just a Copa del Rey final to show for the season, despite the clear euphoria in the Madridista world ahead of Tuesday’s Old Trafford event.

Real Sociedad & Betis
After what was a rather stodgy Sunday, with two goalless draws, these two teams served up a corker in the final match of the day. Betis surprised themselves so much in taking a two goal lead that the team promptly lost it, going 3-2 down after a now fashionable Panenka penalty from Xabi Prieto. But Pabón scored his second of the night to level the scores in what Betis boss Pepe Mel described as “a great game. Both teams could have won and lost.”
“If it was boxing, we would have won on points,” claimed his Sociedad counterpart, Philippe Montanier.

Getafe
Club captain, Jaime Gavilán, revealed that talk of Europe was banned in the dressing room - although the Harlem Shake wasn’t - as every time the word is brought up “we brick ourselves”. A bit like one of those low frequency amplifiers the blog once read about. Mops may be needed soon, as Friday’s 2-0 win over Getafe sees the club with three wins from three and four from five.

Levante
Levante remain undefeated in the past four meetings with city rivals Valencia in Mestalla, a fact that must be fairly irksome to that part of the city, not always known for patience and understanding.

Espanyol & Valladolid
Both managers were a little chuffed after a goalless draw Marca suggested almost had the crowd shouting “let them kiss” - the sign of a clash where neither side have any real desire to win.

Markel Susaeta
Athletic really, really, really needed the 1-0 victory at Osasuna. Really needed it. Honestly. Three defeats had headlines openly discussing the immediate future of Marcelo Bielsa, however a fine volley from Susaeta in a pumped and primed affair in Pamplona gave Athletic a victory after three straight league defeats. The Athletic boss spoke of heart and soul getting his players through, admitting that “the parameters used to evaluate the merits” were not in Athletic’s favour. LLL thinks Bielsa is referring to ‘stats’.

Tomer Hemed
The last minute winner from the Israeli striker in the 2-1 defeat of Granada was the forward’s first effort in la Liga since the middle of November, and just Mallorca’s second victory since the end of September. LLL is not sure it’s going to make too much difference to the club’s survival chances with Real Madrid and Barcelona just around the corner, but a victory away from home can’t do any harm.

Bad Day

Barcelona
A golden opportunity to get some instant payback against a Madrid side that was without Mesut Özil, Cristiano Ronaldo and Angel di María in the starting line-up. Heck, even José Callejón was playing, Madrid were that relaxed. But Barça were a shadow of themselves. There was tons of pretty, pointless passing, but absolutely no end product aside from a through ball to Leo Messi from Dani Alves that looked so simple, it’s a wonder by Barça can’t do it all the time.
The reaction in the Barcelona to the press was split between the nonsensical and Mundo Deportivo that moaned about the penalty decision and grumbled about “theft, scandal and refereeing manipulation.” Sport were able to see the bigger picture with Sunday’s front cover fretting over “no ideas, no direction, no attitude...and just 10 days to fix it.”

David Villa
The tiny-bearded striker didn’t exactly do himself or others calling for a starting role any favours with a bit of a flat performance in the Santiago Bernabéu. Then again, Villa was in good company in that department.

Valencia
That had to hurt. 2-1 up to pesky neighbours Levante thanks to an absolute stormer of a goal from Roberto Soldado, before a defensive slip (quite literally) let José Javier Barkero through with a minute left on the clock. “Football has been hard on us,” grumbled Valencia boss, Ernesto Valverde.

Manolo Jiménez
Yet another one of the Zaragoza managers ‘finals’ previously spoken about was lost in a rather piddling 2-0 defeat to Getafe. The Aragon outfit have not won in nine now and could well end up in the relegation zone should Celta beat Sevilla on Monday night. This provoked an outburst from Jiménez suggesting that anyone without the cojones for the fight “jump the ship.”

Deportivo
Well, it’s a point and the side’s first clean sheet in seven games, however the goalless draw at home to Rayo Vallecano didn’t do the Galician’s any good at all. Indeed the home side was perhaps lucky not to end up with a defeat after Rayo missed a number of chances in the first half. “The situation is severe...everyone knows it,” admitted manager Fernando Vazquez, who had a bad Saturday all round after his car was towed away from the stadium having been illegally parked.

La Preview: Medel’s madness, Depor’s despair & Athletic’s eternal optimism

2013-03-01T11:47:00Z

Our man in Madrid, Tim Stannard previews the weekend's action in Spain...

FRIDAY

Getafe (9th) v Zaragoza (17th) – 21.00 (all kick-offs Spanish local time)
Scheduling a Getafe game at nine on a Friday night is just plain mean. It’s hard enough to persuade fans into the stadium when there’s no other competition for attention, never mind the option of being in a nice warm bar with buddies after a tough week of work (and coffee breaks) instead of standing in a freezing cold Coliseum watching a side destined to finish 11th play a team who will end up 15th.

Still, Getafe are on a reasonable run of form at the moment and still chirpy after 3-1 win at Mallorca, a victory inspired by a Panenka penalty from Diego Castro – his 14th successive successful spot-kick. This week, the former Sporting striker revealed the sensational secrets behind his penalty perfection.

“Aside from precision and choosing the right place to put it, there’s a bit of luck,” admitted the Getafe man, who also spoke about choosing the Panenka on that particular occasion. “It’s the third time I’ve done it. Goalkeepers watch videos, and it’s an alternative to putting down the middle, right or left.”
LLL Prediction – Draw

SATURDAY

Real Madrid (3rd) v Barcelona (1st) – 16.00
So here comes Clásico VI of the current campaign, with two more to come should the pair meet in the Champions League. The latest edition has nothing to do with the title race, which is fairly done and dusted, so much as how both teams are going to react after Tuesday’s result. Will Madrid bite back and will risk a few key players ahead of the Manchester United match, just to chance to turn up the pain on the league leaders?

Either way, LLL isn't entirely sure how many people in the UK and Europe will be able to watch it, considering it’s in the football hot-zone at four on a Saturday afternoon, which in Spain is normally the preserve of Celta Vigo matches. It has been brought forward to give Real Madrid as much rest as possible before heading to Old Trafford; indeed, the Bernabeu boys wanted the match to be played on Friday night. That idea was a non-starter, so you'll just have to have Getafe v Zaragoza instead.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Deportivo (20th) v Rayo Vallecano (8th) – 18.00
Domingos Paciencia has spoken out over why he only managed six games in charge of the Galician club at the beginning of 2013 before legging it back to Portugal. The former Braga boss revealed what everyone pretty much knew about the footballers at Deportivo in the first place – that they have the hump about not being paid, and rightly so.

“There were players owed five months' wages,” wide-eyed the Portuguese, “and we had to ask them to go out and give everything. I wasn’t able to motivate footballers if they had to think about how to pay for their house or kid’s school.”

Over in Vallekas, Jordi Amat is unusually the talk of the town after his 180-yard barnbuster against Valladolid cancelled out the own goal he'd scored milliseconds earlier. “I noticed that the keeper was usually high up the field, so I thought next time I'd surprise him from long distance when I had the ball.” Amat's next fiendish plan could be how to get booked against Deportivo so he serves out a suspension cycle against Espanyol, a clash he can’t play in anyway due to the terms of the loan agreement from the Catalan club.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Osasuna (14th) v Athletic Bilbao (16th) – 20.00
It’s quite fun to watch the Athletic Bilbao players still claiming to love life under Marcelo Bielsa, despite having a miserable time lately with three successive defeats leaving them three points off the relegation zone. “I see the boss stronger and with more energy than ever,” claimed Ander Iturraspe, interpreting intense pacing, squatting and yelling as desire.

LLL was actually quite surprised to discover Osasuna are above Athletic going into this game, but in recent weeks they have become specialists at out-muscling relegation rivals in Pamplona – their last three home games have been narrow wins against Deportivo (then 20th), Celta (then 18th) and Zaragoza (then 16th).

A fourth successive crunch home win would go down particularly well with the Osasuna massive, who dislike Athletic for their habit of pinching young local talent such as Fernando Llorente and Javi Martínez with the promise of subsequent acrimonious departures to foreign leagues in their mid-twenties.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valencia (5th) v Levante (10th) – 22.00
Valencia may not know who the manager is going to be next season with no movement in regards to Ernesto Valverde’s contract extension, but there are whispers aplenty over who will be replacing the likes of Adil Rami and Sofiane Feghouli when they are sold over the summer to help pay for some bags of concrete in the never-ending construction of new Mestalla.

Rumours over the winter transfer window had Celta striker Iago Aspas signing up. More recently, stories have done the rounds about signing Levante midfielder Vicente Iborra and Real Madrid’s Raúl Albiol, who left in 2009, as the club strives to make itself a little more Valencian. Perfect timing for Saturday night's city derby: Valencia haven’t taken three points from Levante at the Mestalla in six years.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SUNDAY

Granada (15th) v Mallorca (19th) – 12.00
If only the same passion and brilliance from the Mallorca players in declaring week-in, week-out that the next game is a must-win final and that everyone is ready for a fight could be repeated in the team’s performances, Mallorca would surely be challenging for second.

“We are giving reasons, in our play, to keep believing in ourselves,” said Tomás Pina despite the club’s current record of one league victory in 20. “What we are lacking is this victory that can help us. If we manage a run of three wins then we’ll be out of the bottom,” promised the midfielder.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Espanyol (13th) v Valladolid (11th) – 17.00
It’s time for a peep through the cat-flap at Valladolid – a rarity, which is a shame as LLL has got a bit of a soft spot for the violet-themed gritsters. Last weekend’s win at Rayo put the club on 33 points and no club has been relegated from a 20-team la Primera, three points for a win and all that, having reached that mark at this stage of the season. So hooray for them.

Speaking at the club this week has been recent Swedish import Daniel Larsson, a striker being asked to play on the wing while the very handy Patrick Ebert is injured. “La Liga is much better than the Swedish one and it’s been a bit difficult for me, but I always work hard. I want to score a goal against Espanyol,” parped the serene Swede.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Málaga (4th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) – 19.00
Once again, the annual Copa del Rey final balls-up is upon us and it’s going to be Atlético Madrid against Real Madrid in a whopping dust-up whose date and location have yet to be confirmed. The original planned day of Saturday May 18 coincides with the Eurovision Song Contest, an event that the national broadcaster is obliged to show despite Spain’s dismal showing in it every year. Quite how this clash wasn’t spotted until recently is anyone’s guess. The game may well now take place on the Friday or Sunday afterwards.

The location is also up for debate with the assumption that the Spanish FA are not wacky enough to send both sets of fans to Valencia or Barcelona for the final. However, there’s a tradition between both Capital City clubs to alternate the games between their stadiums. Seeing as the last final between the pair in 1992 took place at the Santiago Bernabéu, the Vicente Calderón is set to be the location. Unless Atlético want more seats for their fans and more gate receipts, that is. Or everyone heads to the Camp Nou for Barcelona’s police to deal with. This could take a while.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Real Sociedad (6th) v Betis (7th) – 21.00
It’s difficult to know whether la Real striker Carlos Vela's current hot streak is a help or a hindrance to a possible return to Arsenal, the club from whence he came last summer. On loan in San Sebastian last season, the Mexican knocked in 12 goals; he's well on the way to beating that this season with 11 strikes, and is one of the principal reasons why la Real are a sneaky outside bet for a Champions League spot.

Chatting to the press this week, Vela revealed that a return to the Emirates is a possibility. “Arsenal can buy me through paying €1m more than la Real paid [€4m]. We will see what happens.” That coquettishly said, Vela claimed he would prefer to stay at a club that will probably finish sixth in Spain, as opposed to one that will do roughly the same in England: “It’s a project I’d like to be a part of and time will tell if I can do it.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY

Sevilla (12th) v Celta Vigo (18th) – 21.30
Quiet night for Gary ‘Pitbull’ Medel on Wednesday night in Sevilla’s Copa del Rey draw (and aggregate defeat) to Atlético Madrid. The midfield loon-bag was sent off for two yellows – the second being a huge whack into Diego Costa – and had to be manhandled into the tunnel, but not before talking a huge swipe at a chair which hit a police officer, who kindly didn’t bang Medel to rights. The Sevilla footballer also managed to boot Tiago out of the game in the 24th minute and for the next two months by breaking the Atlético’s man’s arm.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Madrid maul Barça as Sevilla prepare to tear into Atlético

2013-02-27T10:44:00Z

COPA DEL REY SEMI-FINAL Tue 26 Feb Barcelona 1-3 Real Madrid (agg 2-4) Wed 27 Feb Sevilla v Atletico Madrid (1-2)

If it were possible to pour all the aspects of the more... let’s say fervent (and definitely not lunatic) Barcelona and Real Madrid international collective into two individuals, then you’d have a couple of frothing at the mouth scary types face-to-face on Wednesday morning.

The Catalan crazy would be yelling “16 points! 16 points! 16 points! Copa del Rey smells of wee!” to the Madrid-mad counterpart, who would have fingers firmly planted in ears whilst tauntingly quoting the headline from AS: “Take that! Take that! Take that!”

La Liga Loca sounds like it’s going a bit over the top here, but a couple of tweets from a Real Madrid fan to the blog’s direction after the match is a suggestion of what kind of fever pitch emotions we're dealing with here.

“We don't need your stupid opinions about RMD, go join your fellow losers and cry to death. Dedication to your president,” yelled LLL’s new BFF. “Just go to bed with your bitterness!!!HALA MADRID!!!Apparently all your friends are crying in their blankets!” (For the purpose of balance, LLL should note that this type of nonsense also comes from the other side when the result happens to be reversed.)

Still, it keeps people happy in these troubled times, especially those at Marca and AS with the latter's editorial celebrating “the first really good night for Real Madrid this season”. Wonderful Tomás Roncero can celebrate a 1-0 win over Getafe like it’s a World Cup final, so it’s no surprise that the AS columnist is in celebratory mood, fizzing over “unified Madrid, focused, happy with life, connected, ambitious, destructive, applied, adventurous, bold, ingenious and talented.”

With the thesaurus discarded, Roncero for good measure turns his attention to Tuesday’s opposition claiming that “Barcelona are a fashion and fashions are for passengers. Madrid is the history of football, Madrid is the past, present and future. God save the King. And Madrid.”

The response in Barcelona has been to try and keep a stiff upper lip after Madrid’s best victory in the Camp Nou for 50 years, with Sport's front page declaring that “it was a disaster, but we have to pick ourselves up.”

“Barça are knocked out,” writes a gloomy Josep Maria Casanovas. “Out of the cup final, far from their best form, way below Madrid who beat them fair and square. If the defeat against Milan was a great disappointment, last night was a huge hammer blow to set off the alarms.”

With all the Clásico hullaballoo in the air, it’s easy to forget that Real Madrid’s opponents in the final – date yet to be confirmed, due to initial date's clash with the Eurovision Song Contest – are playing their semi-final second-leg clash on Wednesday night.

Atlético Madrid travel to Sevilla holding a 2-1 lead in a tie between two teams who really don’t like each other – a rivalry partly stemming from the Andalusian side claiming that they, rather than the Rojiblancos, have been the country’s third-best side in recent years.

With Atlético going great guns in la Liga, it’s fair to say that the match means a heck of a lot more for a mid-table Sevilla, with sporting director Monchi even musing that the game is more important than the 2006 UEFA Cup semi-final against Schalke. “I’m sure that the stadium is going to be a cauldron. From the first minute we are going to see a hyper-motivated and hyperactive support,” enthused club president José María del Nido.

Unai Emery is just as giddy about the affair in the Sánchez Pizjuán and brought his big game to the party in the pre-match press conference. “We have to be aggressive but controlled... and not tear into them for the sake of it, getting a red card,” explained the Sevilla boss. “We have to isolate ourselves from the excitement. It’s something that can be positive and negative at the same time.”

The club has been helping to turn the tension up a notch or two by recording a TV spot showing Sevilla fans waiting at the railway station for the Atlético squad to arrive, a whole week before the match. Sadly there were no images of the same supporters legging it sharpish when Diego Simeone and Cata Diaz come charging through the front doors wielding their suitcases like battle-hammers. LLL has a happy feeling it’s going to be that kind of game.

Clásico referee criticised before game has even begun

2013-02-26T11:33:00Z

A sympathetic La Liga Loca can only imagine that Undiano Mallenco must have received the news that he was set to be in charge of Tuesday’s Copa del Rey Clásico second leg with the weariest of sighs, knowing full well the borderline slanderous accusations that would soon be heading in the referee’s direction.

And so it came to pass on Monday with Jordi Roura – half football coach, half Easter Island statue – and an accusation of refereeing pre-crime, that beloved Spanish hobby of stomping all over decisions made during the match before the game has taken place.
“The referee is who he is and we don’t talk about the referees,” said the stand-in Barça boss, talking about the referees. “But there is evidence that our results with this referee are worse than others – and we remember that he let a lot go in the [2011] Copa del Rey final.”

Completely coincidentally, Real Madrid won that final – a match at the Mestalla, clinched in injury time, that Mundo Deportivo recalls being “a thriller of fouls and violence.” What’s more, Mallenco is so mean and pro-Madrid/anti-Barça that the Catalan club have come out on top in three of the previous six Clásicos the referee has been in charge of, with one draw.

This pre-crime complaint was too good for José Mourinho to pass up. The Madrid manager was due to be continuing his vow of silence on Monday, with Xabi Alonso scheduled to talk to the press. The midfielder was given the swift elbow, though, with a typically terse, grumpy-head Mourinho delighting in a bout of sarcasm with his own response when questioned on the referee for the night.

“I prefer to keep the lessons we have learned in the past from Barcelona. Lessons in sporting behaviour, how football should be. Not talking about referees, not surrounding them, not looking for cards for rivals. Not hiding things, and of course, lessons in how to play football, that they do very well. You need to try to stay humble in following this line.”

Probably feeling a lot better having let all this out, Mourinho drifted into the background to decide whether any of his players would fancy giving Cristiano Ronaldo a hand during the clash, perhaps at the same time as Tito Vilanova was musing in New York whether to try the patience of the culé collective – and David Villa – by starting with Alexis Sánchez.

This kind of verbal jousting has been absent between the two teams in the previous three Clásicos this season, perhaps because Mourinho is a little bit scared of Tito Vilanova one day getting his revenge for the eye-poke (LLL feels ludicrous even writing that).

However, Roura’s comments have spiced things up nicely and some areas of the press in Barcelona are standing behind their guy. “Roura didn’t say anything we don’t already know,” claimed Sport director Joan Vehils. "There was nothing disrespectful or ironic, simply an explanation of what happens every time that this referee is charge of Barça games."

This all leaves LLL is two minds about the match, which has a wholly unpredictable outcome with the scores at 1-1. The previous 24 Clásicos played over the past 18 months have been tremendous affairs without much of the card-waving, Busquets-tumbling, Pepe-rampaging nonsense. However, it might be fun to have a bit of a reboot niggle, even to make Saturday’s wholly irrelevant Clásico at the Bernabéu in la Liga a little bit easier to bear.

La Review: Another win for Atlético as doomed Depor face drop

2013-02-25T12:40:00Z

LA LIGA Fri 22 Feb Athletic Bilbao 1-3 Real Sociedad Sat 23 Feb Mallorca 1-3 Getafe, Real Zaragoza 2-2 Valencia, Deportivo La Coruña 1-2 Real Madrid, Barcelona 2-1 Sevilla Sun 24 Feb Rayo Vallecano 1-2 Real Valladolid, Celta Vigo 2-1 Granada, Atlético Madrid 1-0 Espanyol, Real Betis 3-0 Málaga Mon 25 Feb Levante v Osasuna

GOOD DAY

David Villa
Back in action after a very painful-sounding bout of renal colic, the Barcelona striker started the league clash against Sevilla. And Villa cancelled out Sevilla's first-half opener, Barça having been a little slow out of the blocks, before Leo Messi added a second for the Catalan club to make it 22 wins from 25 for in la Liga. “We’ve always said Villa’s an important player for us, he’s got goals in him,” claimed Jordi Roura.

Leo Messi
The Argentinian is just 13 goals from beating last season’s tally of 50, which the blog was suspecting could never be done. Ever. It could be completed by the end of March at this rate, to leave La Liga Loca eating humble pie. At least, it’s some kind of pie.

Diego Costa
The Atlético striker was in top rampaging pain-in-the bum form against Espanyol at the Vicente Calderón. Costa won the foul for Atlético’s winning penalty, converted by Falcao to win the game, and was a menace all evening. Atlético had to play much of the second half with 10 men, but that made no difference in a game where the Rojiblancos never looked in any danger.

“That’s our way of playing,” said Diego Costa after the match. “It doesn’t matter if there’s one player more or less, everyone gives their all, and this is what makes us a very strong team.” Atlético’s magnificent season continues with the team probably needing just a couple more wins from the remaining matches to ensure Champions League football next season.

Kaká
Three impressive displays against Sevilla, Rayo and now Deportivo have tipsters in the Spanish capital suggesting that the Brazilian may start Tuesday’s Copa del Rey Clásico. “If the boss needs me, I’m there,” said Kaká after a game which saw Real Madrid putting on typically lacklustre first-half away performance before bucking up their ideas in the second to win 2-1, with the Brazilian bagging the opener.

Jonas
The Valencia striker was all with the not-waving-but-frowning after his brace against Zaragoza, possibly due to a bit of pressure from the fans for not contributing enough this season. Or maybe he just feels a little bit down. Who knows, but either way, it’s the perfect excuse for the blog to dust off its “Jonas Bothers” joke.

Real Sociedad
A remarkable campaign for la Real continues with Friday's 3-1 Basque derby win at Athletic Bilbao, which put the side just two points from the Champions League places. Indeed, if Málaga fail in their appeal against a UEFA ban from European competition next season, then there’s no reason at all why Real Sociedad can’t be with the big guns once again. They have now lost just one league match in 15, now including the pleasure of victory in the final derby at San Mamés.

Betis
There’s been a lot of nervousness around the Betis squad, with the team winless in five matches and taking themselves off to Jerez to prepare for Sunday’s visit of Málaga. What was needed was an early goal to sooth the football juices, and that’s what was achieved with Molina's first-minute header from a corner. Indeed, the Osasuna-style move worked so well that they repeated it after 26 minutes with Beñat popping the ball onto Mario’s head for the second in what ended up being a 3-0 win.

Jordi Amat
Having apparently got an inadvertent touch to the goal that put Valladolid in the lead with 19 minutes to go, the Rayo centre-back immediately made good at the right end with a 45-yard strike which took just 2.6 seconds to hit the back of the net. Unfortunately, a diddle from Ález Gálvez gifted Valladolid a winner with 10 minutes to go. “They beat us because we handed it to them,” fumed Rayo boss Paco Jémez.

Adrián Colunga
He may not have always seen eye to eye with manager Luis García, and has often been linked with moves away from the Coliseum, but the striker popped up with a brace to beat Mallorca to make it three wins from four for Getafe. Now four points from the European places, the Madrid club can either kick on for a top six spot or settle back into midtable comfort like last season. Sadly, the blog suspects the latter.

Valladolid
The win at Rayo ended a run of four winless matches for Valladolid, who frankly won't care how the victory came about, and nor should they.

Iago Aspas
Having been heavily criticised by former boss Paco Herrera for being in cloud cuckoo land of late, the striker scored for new manager Abel Resino in a 2-1 win over Granada. “This result puts us back into the fight and gives us confidence,” said Resino of Celta’s first win in eight.

BAD DAY

Málaga
The south-coast side are trying to balance league and Champions League commitments, and although they sent out a strong XI against the desperate Betis in Seville, it was the team with the greatest need who came out on top.

Marcelo Bielsa
The Athletic boss looks immensely sackable now, which is quite remarkable when considering how much of a beloved eccentric genius the Argentinian was a year ago. The Bilbao side lost the final Basque derby at their century-old San Mamés home; it was their sixth home loss, the third defeat in a row, included their 50th conceded goal and left them just three points above the relegation zone.
“Football has laws I can’t ignore,” admitted Bielsa after the game while staring into the top of his desk, as per the norm. “I don’t know how much longer the confidence can last.” Next week’s trip to Osasuna already looks brutal.

Zaragoza
Ooh, that has to hurt. Drawing 2-2 against Valencia in injury time, relegation-threatened Zaragoza bundled the ball into the back of the net for what looked like a crucial winner. Unfortunately for them, the strike was ruled out with the impression that the referee suspected, rather than saw, some sort of infringement in the box. “The goalkeeper collided with his own teammates and the goal was legal,” fumed Zaragoza boss Manolo Jiménez, who had already seen his team throw away a two-goal lead.

Mallorca
Any Mallorca fans seeking a "Yep, that’s us going down, then" moment got it this weekend, not just with the home loss to Getafe but with the manner of the defeat. They were 1-0 up and unlucky to concede a second-half penalty for one of those ball-to-arm (or chest) incidents that Spanish referees are obsessed with. Diego Castro's ‘Panenka’ spot-kick killed off Mallorquin spirits and the home side’s defence fell apart to concede two late goals.

Now seven points from safety, Mallorca need to string victories together but have only won once away since September 23 and their next five games include Sevilla, Real Madrid and Barcelona.

Deportivo
Meh. LLL was all with the smugness at the draw prediction for the clash against Real Madrid. Everything was going to plan, with Deportivo defending doggedly and the opposition being in typically hopeless away form. Even when Riki scored an opener (fancy that) the blog was still confident in claiming that the ‘draw’ vibe held, despite a home win. But then Kaká and Higuaín had to go and score late goals. Deportivo are properly down now, having lost six league games in a row for the first time in the club’s history.

Levante lead the way in Europe, as old boys look to return to haunt Atlético

2013-02-22T09:53:00Z

Friday

Athletic Bilbao (15th) v Real Sociedad (6th) - 21.30 (all kick-offs local time)
La Real fans Gorka Santos and Ander Etxaniz had a bit of time to kill earlier this week - not to mention some pretty sturdy sleeping bags. The pair camped outside their club’s ticket office for 31 hours to make sure they had their frozen hands on two of the 400 available tickets for Friday’s Basque derby.
The match isn’t just a pretty good chance for the San Sebastian supporters to see their boys win in Bilbao, but also the opportunity to catch the last derby between the two teams in San Mamés. To cheer up the fans through the day and night on Monday, Philippe Montanier and some of his players wandered past with bottles of water and club shop goody bags ahead of an away fixture la Real have not won since 2000/01.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Saturday

Mallorca (19th) v Getafe (11th) - 16.00
It’s almost as if those running the game in Spain wanted to find the polar opposite to the excitement generated by the match set to be played in the same time-slot a week later - Real Madrid v’s Barcelona. This could be an horrendous affair between a team that are limp as lettuce away from home - with just three wins from 12 - and a Mallorca side with just the single victory from 19 league games.
Still, defender Nunes is optimistic about Mallorca’s chances, and takes positives from last week’s 2-0 defeat at Valencia. “We did what few teams have done in Mestalla. We had clear chances,” said the club captain. He was perhaps overly bigging-up his own side, given Deportivo stuck three past Valencia in their own ground, while Real Madrid and Real Sociedad managed five. Nunes also asks for the 12,000 or so who come to games to return on Saturday and perhaps bring a few friends along too. “The match is at a good time, we want everyone there with us, it’s very important as we notice this.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Zaragoza (17th) v Valencia (5th) - 18.00
With rumours of Valencia coach Ernesto Valverde already having a pre-pre-pre-agreement with Athletic Bilbao for next season before he'd even taken his current post in December, the nerves are increasing in Mestalla over the non-movement of a deal to keep him at the club beyond the end of his current deal in June.
Thusly, Roberto Soldado was wheeled out on Wednesday with a bit of a ‘please don’t go’ appeal to the manager. “The dressing room loves him and we would all love it if he stays with us,” gleamed the striker who then admitted something that must have delighted the man he replaced, Mauricio Pellegrino. “The players are giving much more than we did at the start of the season,” recalled the Mestalla marksman.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Deportivo (20th) v Real Madrid (3rd) - 20.00
By Jimmeny Cricket, new Deportivo manager Fernando Vázquez has a plan to keep Deportivo up. Step 1) As revealed to Spanish radio station, Cadena Ser, Depor are looking to win eight of their remaining matches. LLL thinks they can manage five at most, and that's only if they quickly learn how to defend over the next few days. Step 2) Learn the basics of football. “I want a team that knows that to do with the ball and what to do when it doesn’t have it.” Step 3) Take points off a Real Madrid team that is largely hopeless away from home and has only won one of the past 19 clashes between these two teams in La Coruña. LLL thinks this particular part will be mission accomplished. Not sure about the rest though.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Barcelona (1st) v Sevilla (10th) - 22.00
“More out than in,” was the opinion of Santi Nolla, director of Barcelona-based Mundo Deportivo, the morning after the Champions League defeat to Milan in San Siro. Despite the handball in the lead up to the Italian side’s first goal, the mood in Barcelona is of few complaints about the result, with Nolla lamenting the fact the Spanish league leaders were “incapable of creating chances, when the key to the result was to score.” The vibe was the same with Sport, whose front cover on Thursday was “No excuses” with a tiff over “the worst Barça” and “the worst referee”. Things have suddenly gotten interesting in the Camp Nou world.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Rayo Vallecano (7th) v Valladolid (13th) - 12.00
Looking at the fun had here by Rayo Vallecano fans on a special metro to the Santiago Bernabéu last weekend, it’s a wonder they don’t do trips around the city before every home game. Enjoy the wonderful madness.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Celta Vigo (18th) v Granada (14th) - 17.00
New Celta boss Abel Resino looks like a grumpy old goat, and in LLL’s experience, that’s exactly what the former goalkeeper is. The blog has seen him scowling at Atlético Madrid, Valladolid and Granada in recent seasons, and looks forward to repeating the experience the next time Celta Vigo are in town. Resino hasn’t had the best of starts to his tenure at the Galicia club due to the unfortunate Salva Ballesta business, but does face an intriguing game on Sunday which is being branded ‘a final’ in Galicia. Of course.
Able Abel took over opponents Granada in January last season, when the side was in trouble and was able to keep them up. The new Celta boss is now facing his former club and a manager in the form of Lucas Alcaraz who is attempting to do the exact same thing with the Andalusian side. Confused? You will be, as two emergency deployment managers collide.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Espanyol (12th) - 19.00
It’s an Atlético old guard coming to take on the new Rojiblancos, who will still be thawing out after their Europa League win (but ultimately defeat) in Moscow. Javier Aguirre used to manage at the Vicente Calderón, while Espanyol players Joan Capdevila, Martin Petrov and Simao all used to play there. Despite Atlético winning 12 from 12 at home in la Liga this season, the all-powerful spirit of the new manager sees Espanyol fancying their chances in the Spanish capital. “Now we feel we can take on anyone,” growls Víctor Sánchez.
LLL will be popping along to this particular match, mainly to see if Espanyol’s in-form forward man, Stuani, will be continuing to play with a protective mask over his face despite being given the all clear to remove it after suffering a broken cheekbone. The blog reads reports the Uruguayan may continue to sport the mask which has now become a good luck token. Spain is different.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Betis (8th) v Málaga (4th) - 21.00
Betis president, Miguel Guillén, was as cool as cucumber last season when his club went through an awful spell - far worse than the current two points from 15 run for Betis - and people were calling for the firing of Pepe Mel. Guillén is the peacemaker once again, with Betis struggling to score goals and struggling to get results that sees the side slipping out of European contention. “The objective is clear: nobody was going crazy before and nobody is thinking that it’s a disaster now.”
Meanwhile the real cause of Málaga's poor showing against Porto has become evident - the team’s third choice kit, which is green. Málaga have played two matches in the outfit, with two defeats. “Clearly, the shirt doesn’t score goals but the Málaga dressing room is superstitious and there’s been talk of talking the kit out of circulation,” reports Marca.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Monday

Levante (9th) v Osasuna (16th) - 21.00
With Spain's four Champions League sides all failing to win the first legs of the Last 16 clashes, and Atletico Madrid crashing out of the Europa League, it has been left to Levante to keep the flag flying for la Liga.
To celebrate this fact, Levante’s bosses took pretty much the entire club’s staff - including the gardener - to Greece for the Olympiacos clash, as a way of thanking them for their efforts and as a mini celebration of another top year. The party on the plane will have been a pretty darn good one, LLL imagines, with Levante picking up a 1-0 win against Míchel’s men to put them through to the next round against Rubin Kazan, the slayers of Atlético Madrid.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Barça’s big battles, Málaga’s Porto problems and a coaching circus at Celta

2013-02-20T12:05:00Z

If you ply your trade in the Catalan sports papers, you’ve pretty much got two options for your lead ahead of any Barça match: either a smug reflection on the club’s wonderful youth system, or a smug reflection on the wonderful Leo Messi.

Perhaps in a decision made over a tasty and traditional lunch of some kind of vegetable dipped in batter, both big papers in Barcelona have gone for a two pronged approach on Wednesday, ahead of Barça’s match against AC Milan. Mundo Deportivo have trumpeted the “Masia team in San Siro!” with Sport plonking a lovely photograph of Leo Messi on the front cover, with the banner “The Clásico of Champions”.

It’s a sign that the last 16 tie with Silvio Berlusconi’s battlers is a game where Barça are expected to pass through without too much fuss and discomfort, like a bunch of grapes consumed just before bedtime. But that doesn’t stop Mundo Deportivo's Miguel Rico trying to grab the attention of the average Barça fan, who may have been lulled into a soporific state of stultifying stupour by a non-existent title race.

“The next seven matches are going to make the season. Five will be at the Camp Nou and two will be life or death.” A picky LLL will take issue with regards to the league games in question as, Barça could lose every one 57-0 and Real Madrid would still be light years behind in the table. The upcoming Copa del Rey and Champions League clashes are only important until an even more important, season-defining match comes along in a couple of week’s time.

Still, it’s Einstein-level physics compared to the hyperbole written by Sport's Josep Maria Casanovas, who may have needed to wipe himself down following his attempt to get everyone else’s juices flowing, as well as his own. “Dear Reader, close your eyes, let your imagination fly and when it comes back, picture being in the San Siro dressing room half-an-hour before the match begins,” writes Casanovas, kicking off a reverie of footballers being all calm, collected and deciding who’s going to give Bojan a wedgie. LLL actually imagines the dressing room being empty at that stage, given it's when the players will be out enjoying their pre-match warm up.

The Sport scribe also has full confidence in the ability of Tito Vilanova to oversee Barça’s affairs from New York - “he has a lot of free time to think” - where the manager is undergoing treatment for his illness, using “new technologies making miracles” such as an “iPhone and iPod”. God bless Alexander Graham Bell.

Barça are aiming to be the first la Liga side to secure victory in this season's Champions League knock-out stages. Málaga suffered a bit of Tuesday night bother with a 1-0 defeat away to Porto, although it could have been a lot worse for the visitors. “We didn’t create much danger,” admitted manager Manuel Pellegrini. “They beat us in midfield,” rued Julio Baptista. However, Málaga are still in with a more than decent chance in the return leg, with the damage from the evening fairly limited in the end.

Traveling north through Portugal and out the other end into Vigo, Celta president Carlos Mouriño didn’t exactly have one of his finest hours. Despite blathering on about sticking with coach Paco Herrera through thick and thin - “you either have credit or you don’t, Herrera has it with us,” the Celta overlord announced last Wednesday - the decision was made to fire poor Paco after the weekend defeat to Getafe.

The problem was that Herrera was pretty much the last to hear this news, with surely former Levante and Atlético Madrid boss Abel Resino lined-up behind his back. There was then a bit of a hitch when Resino's desired number two, Salvo Ballesta, was refused a post due to pressure from the club's fans. Ballesta is a character whose very clear and oft-reported notions of what constitutes being Spanish were always unlikely to sit well with the regionalism of Galicia.

“I don’t have fixed political ideas. I’ve said this a thousand times,” said the irked former player. “I’m Spanish and will die being a Spaniard.” Ballesta also said that a lot of what was written about him was nonsense, telling TV show Punto Pelota “I don’t admire Nazis”.

Mouriño claimed in a testy press conference on Tuesday that any agreement to bring in Ballesta was made between Resino and himself. “Celta didn’t veto anyone. Celta either sign someone of they don’t,” explained Mouriño unhelpfully. “We decided he couldn’t come to Celta after analysing the problems he had in other clubs and his inexperience of being the second coach of our team.”

So that’s both Galician teams going down then....

Sergio Ramos goes from hero to villain to curtail rookie Morata's big day

2013-02-18T11:05:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's man in Spain, Tim Stannard, sums up the best and worst of the weekend's action from La Liga...

Good Day

Leo Messi
It would probably be easier for the blog to simply compile a weekly list of statistics and landmarks achieved by the Argentine, who is now getting increasingly boring. Messi's brace in Barça’s 2-1 win at Granada sees the 25-year-old move on to 301 goals for the Catalan club in official games, 238 of those in la Liga. Messi has now scored in 14 league games in a row, banging in 24 along the way.

Diego Simeone
This may sound dull, but that never stopped LLL before. For the seventh time now, Atlético Madrid have bounced back immediately after dropping points in la Liga. The comprehensive 3-0 win at Valladolid which followed last week’s defeat at Rayo was also Atlético's first away win in all competitions for in eight attempts. “Today, I’m proud of my team, a team of men,” growled Diego Simeone.

Alvaro Morata
La Liga Loca is going to give the Madrid youth team product the benefit of the doubt with a placement in the Good Day section, despite an appearance lasting just 26 minutes due to the unfortunate sending off of Sergio Ramos and a subsequent tactical rejiggle. Morata was getting his first league start for the club - Karim Benzema was getting the Iker/Adán treatment and watching the game from the bench - and the youngster scored after just three minutes, only to be hauled off before he was able to add to his tally.

Willy Caballero
The 31-year-old Argentine pulled off another fine performance in Málaga's 1-0 win against Bilbao to continue an outstanding campaign which has seen Málaga concede just 21 goals thus far, the best record in la Primera. “It had to be seen to be believed” was the praise from AS on the goalkeeper’s “recital” which had the Spanish crowd chanting for Willy’s instant call up to his national side.

Roberto Soldado
A first league goal in five games for the Valencia forward in the 2-0 victory over Mallorca keeps the chase for fourth spot ticking along nicely. It also maintained a still fragile truce with the Mestalla massive, whose ire is still focussed on club president Manuel Llorente.

Carlos Vela
The former Arsenal striker popped in his ninth league goal of the season in Real Sociedad's 1-1 draw against visiting Levante. The Mexican also got his sixth opponent sent off in the current campaign, after a bit of a hack from Nikos Karabelas. In fact, la Real have now faced teams down to ten men for eight matches in a row which might help explain splendid recent form from the Basque outfit.

Levante
The Valencia side have still got a bit of a way to go before they're safe, with eight or nine more points needed before the end of the season. However the gritty away point at Real Sociedad is a handy one after Thursday night’s impressive 3-0 victory over Olympiakos in Europe.

Gary Medel
LLL would normally scoff at a footballer with the nickname ‘the Pitbull’, but the blog certainly wouldn’t do that to Medel. The Sevilla midfielder is a remarkably terrifying presence, despite being quite a diddy little fella. Medel popped up with a brace in the 3-1 win against visiting Deportivo on Friday night and is one of a number of footballers such as Ivan Rakitic, Jesús Navas and Geoffrey Kondogbia who are improving under Unai Emery.

Luis García
The comfy home win over Celta Vigo keeps Getafe where they feel most happy and snug - eleventh. “We can’t talk about Europe, but we are 12 points from the drop, which is a big distance. In fact we are the second best Getafe in history at this stage, drawing with Míchel’s team,” was the fairly impressive revelation from manager, Luis García.

Espanyol
The 1-0 victory over Betis in Cornella makes it five wins from five at the stadium and even gives the Pericos a faint whiff of European qualification. This is quite incredible considering the mess the club found itself in before Javier Aguirre arrived. “We will suffer until 42 points and safety,” promised the Mexican coach.

Granada
For the third game in a row under Lucas Alcaraz, Granada put in a strong performance. Ultimately, it was Leo Messi who made the difference between the two sides. “The team did better than against Madrid,” opined Alcaraz. “They forced Barça to the limit,” added the Granada boss on a side that were beating the league leaders for 25 minutes, which is worth about 85 minutes in la Liga with a dog years system applicable to matches against the Catalan club these days.

Osasuna
Saturday's 1-0 in over Real Zaragoza was a wonderfully predictable result from Osasuna, who scored early doors - a header from a cross, of course - and hung on in there. The Pamplona club have now successive one-goal home victories over three relegation rivals in the form of Deportivo, Celta Vigo and Zaragoza. “We wanted the results that we got,” chuffed José Luis Mendilibar. “Some will say: I don’t like the way that Osasuna play, but we compete well.”

Bad Day

Sergio Ramos
Two yellows in 45 seconds saw a short shift at the office for the Madrid defender. Ramos was booked for bit of a shove and then a handball - something refs love punishing heavily in Spain, whether it’s intentional or not. “It’s easy to send off Sergio Ramos,” complained the man himself, having earlier scored Madrid's second goal of a 2-0 victory. “Spanish football deserves good refereeing.”

Betis
A worrying slide continues for the Sevilla side, with the 1-0 loss at Espanyol the team’s fifth straight match without a win and fourth without a goal. “I was expecting more from my side,” lamented Pepe Mel.

Athletic Bilbao
“We are having a negative campaign,” was the astute observation of Marcelo Bielsa, whose side are getting sucked towards the relegation zone after two straight defeats 'to nil'. Not even Gorka being replaced between the sticks by back-up Raúl made any difference.

Zaragoza
Suspensions and injuries saw Zaragoza continue their rotten run with a 1-0 defeat at Osasuna. Their last league win was in the match before the winter break, and this joyless run sees the team eking down towards the relegation zone. “We have more desire than ever to get back to training on Monday and prepare for a difficult match against Valencia,” announced an enthused Manolo Jiménez, who desperately needs to find players who can deliver who aren’t Helder Postiga.

Celta Vigo
Like their Galician companions, Celta Vigo are very much whiffing of relegation. The 3-1 defeat to Getafe was pretty comprehensive and owed a great deal to dithering defending at the back at not going on up front. The Coliseum defeat leaves Celta with just a single win in 13 away games. Next week’s home clash against Granada is a bit of a whopper for the future of the club.
At the time of writing, reports suggest Celta boss Paco Herrera may be about to get the sack, despite a lot of support from his bosses in recent weeks.
Regardless of his own future, Herrera had strong words for striker Iago Aspas, who has not scored in six league matches now and was taken off 15 minutes into the second half. “He hasn’t been the player he was for the past two years for a few games now,” lamented the Celta boss on a footballer who has been linked with a move away from the club. “He’s not with the club, he’s not on planet Earth, he’s up in the clouds.”

Mallorca
One win, 19 games. That pretty much says it all for Mallorca who’ve not had any kind of reaction since the arrival of Gregorio Manzano in terms of results.

Deportivo
“Different coach, same mistakes,” bemoaned Marca in the paper’s match report after the 3-1 defeat to Sevilla. “That’s what happens when another team is better than yours,” said manager number three of the season, Fernando Vázquez. Deportivo have now conceded 54 goals, and lost five consecutive league games, the worst record since 1964/65 campaign. Depor have never lost six in a row.

La Preview: Depor raise the dead as Villa breaks pain barrier

2013-02-15T11:32:00Z

FRIDAY

Sevilla (11th) v Deportivo (20th) – 21.30 (all times local Spanish)
After defeat by Granada last Saturday, the soon-to-be-former Deportivo manager Domingos Paciencia offered his resignation in front of the press. The offer was accepted a day later by Augusto César Lendoiro after a lunch or two to mull things over. (Since then, the now-former Depor gaffer has dropped a pretty big hint that he wanted out after just six matches.)

Fernando Vázquez was then phoned in the early hours of Monday morning and asked if he fancied being the club’s third coach of the season. The 58-year-old Harry Potter lookalike was last seen being fired by Celta Vigo in 2007, so he was more than ready to take on by far the worst gig in la Primera. “I want to show that Fernando Vázquez is still alive,” announced the manager on his first main challenge at Depor. “Some thought I’d retired, but I’ve been watching matches and studying a lot. And no-one, NO-ONE, can touch me on Call of Duty.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

SATURDAY

Getafe (12th) v Celta Vigo (18th) – 16.00
Whilst troubled near-neighbours Deportivo have been all with the fan protests, angry letters from supporters groups and firing coaches, Celta have been steadfast and solid with around a hundred supporters turning up for training this week to give the players their backing.

Celta’s president Carlos Mouriño was another member of the Vigo massive to chuck in his support by soothing that the future of the manager is as safe as houses. “We keep on having faith in Paco and in this group of footballers to get us out of the relegation zone,” announced Mouriño. “You either have credit or you don’t; Herrera has it with us.” Which makes him pretty much the only person in cash-strapped Spain to have credit of any kind.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Málaga (4th) v Athletic Bilbao (15th) – 18.00
This week in the blustery Basque Country there's been more navel-gazing than an admiral on an inspection tour, after Athletic's 4-0 home defeat to Espanyol. Right-back Andoni Iraola found it hard to explain away a loss that didn't go down at all well in San Mamés – “If you lose 4-0 you aren't going to be applauded” – while striker Ariz Aduriz admitted that “we’ve had some bad games, but not to this degree. We are are own worst enemies.”

The forward did have some words of support for under-fire keeper Gorka Iraizoz, who hasn't exactly been at his best this season, like much of the Athletic squad. “He’s got plenty of personality, he’s tough, strong and will come out of this even stronger.”
LLL Prediction – Away win

Granada (14th) v Barcelona (1st) – 20.00
If only Pedro had as much tolerance for discomfort as his forward partner David Villa. The pint-sized siesta-lover dislikes the next league Clásico being brought forward to 4pm (Spanish time) a fortnight on Saturday, to give Real Madrid as much preparation as possible ahead of the Champions League return against Manchester United. “I don’t know how we’ll adapt. It’s bad as it disrupts our rest,” moaned Pedro on the inhuman kick-off time.

Meanwhile, poor David Villa has spent the week in, out and then back in hospital with renal colic. A quick search on Wikipedia explained cheerfully that it is known as being “one of the strongest pain sensations felt by humans (being worse than childbirth, broken bones, gunshot wounds, burns, or surgery)". Pedro probably needs a bit of perspective.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Osasuna (17th) v Zaragoza (16th) – 22.00
Finishing with 11 men has become a big ask for Zaragoza this season, with the club picking up an admirable 70 yellow cards and seven reds in the current campaign (although this lags behind Espanyol’s 96 yellows and Sevilla’s 10 reds).

Manolo Jiménez has had quite enough of it, what with his team finding it hard enough to win matches with a full complement of players. The Zaragoza coach suggests that “from now on we have to be more mature and not generate so many cards – although in no ground in Spain are so many cards shown to Zaragoza than in la Romareda.” You can't argue with that – although they do play there at least 19 times a season.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SUNDAY

Real Sociedad (7th) v Levante (9th) – 12.00
Everyone else in the Real Sociedad camp has been having a fun recently, so it was surprising that Antoine Griezmann was a little late to the party, considering that’s one of the Frenchman’s favourite pursuits. The winger’s goal in the 2-1 win at Real Zaragoza was his first since October 29th, but the 21-year-old denies that his iffy form was due to a ban from the French international set-up after breaking a curfew for a much-needed spot of disco-dancing in Paris. “I like it here, because apart from a couple of months when I wasn't at my best I’ve been playing pretty well.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valencia (5th) v Mallorca (19th) – 17.00
LLL loves reading the verbal gymnastics footballers have to go through when an old manager has gone and a new one is in town. It’s a cross between having to admit that the previous coach wasn't entirely to blame that the team sucked so much, but at the same time, he was. Attempting this most entertaining of tasks is Mallorca’s Tomás Pina who says on the sacking of Joaquín Caparrós that “I’m not saying it was necessary because Caparrós made me feel very important and gave a lot to me, so I couldn’t say anything bad about him and will always be grateful, buuuuuuuuuuut it’s true that the dynamic was bad.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valladolid (10th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) – 19.00
Good effort. It seems that Diego Simeone is finally following LLL’s advice by getting knocked out of the Europa League at the earliest opportunity to concentrate on coming second or third in la Liga. On Thursday, Atlético broke a 20-match winning streak in a very empty Vicente Calderón with a 2-0 defeat to Rubin Kazan. However, it might only have been 1-0 if the Atlético coach hadn't made the decision to send goalkeeper Sergio Asenjo up for an injury-time corner, with hilarious counter-attacking consequences.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the Europa League, Míchel The Manager popped back to Spain to show how he is already working wonders at Olympiacos, with his new club contriving to lose 3-0 to the mighty Levante, with the Valencians even having the luxury of missing a penalty. “The result can’t give us anything to complain about,” admitted the former Sevilla boss.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Espanyol (13th) v Betis (8th) – 21.00
A previously out-of-sorts Beñat put in a bit of a shift in last Monday’s goalless draw with Valladolid. Showing his commitment to the Betis cause, the midfielder even wore a big Terry Butcher bandage after a head injury. With just 18 months left on his contract, the much-desired Beñat has many a suitor lining up for his signature, which has caused some Betis fans to accuse him of taking his eye off the ball, figuratively speaking.

“I note the complaints of the crowd, although I try to stay focused,” insists Beñat, who also claims that “I’d like to stay. The club made an offer and we made one. We’ll keep talking in February and in March. But I’d like to either sign my renewal or go in June. It’s not nice to be in a situation like [Fernando] Llorente.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Real Madrid (3rd) v Rayo Vallecano (6th) – 21.00
Rather than concern themselves with yet more set-piece dithering that may have cost Real Madrid another Champions League campaign, AS are gushing over Cristiano Ronaldo's admittedly impressive leap for his goal, which the paper estimates to be 2.93m high [That's 9ft 7in for non-continentals – Imperial Ed.]. “Europe is talking about him today and Old Trafford fears him. With good reason,” spooks AS editor Alfredo Relaño.

Marca are predicting that over the next three weeks the groin-griped Xabi Alonso will only be used in games that actually matter, namely the Champions League and Copa del Rey. His bench-warming may well begin on Sunday with the visit of the all-or-nothing salty sea-dogs Rayo Vallecano, with 1000 of their fans set to make the trip up to the Bernabéu on their own special metro train. Toot, toot!
LLL Prediction – Home win

It's Cristiano Ronaldo vs Manchester United!

2013-02-13T12:00:00Z

Cristiano Ronaldo must have woken up with the most despairing of sighs of Wednesday. Not because there was an early sign of zittage forming on his face ahead of a huge night at the Santiago Bernabéu, but because the Madridista world was baying for more blood, sweat and stay-fast gel from their superstar.

The Real Madrid man has spent the past couple of months dutifully responding to questions on how it feels to be playing Manchester United and reflecting on his relationship with Sir Alex Ferguson. The forward has also found time to bang in a bunch of goals while his team-mates have downed tools and scratched their backsides.

Unfortunately new demands are now being wedged upon Ronnie’s manly shoulders, with Wednesday’s front covers in the Madrid-based papers ordering yet more heroics.

“The night of Cristiano,” yells AS. “It’s your day!” bellows Marca. It seems that only the Portuguese goal machine can get Madrid though their last-16 tie against Manchester United; the papers have given up on everyone else. José Callejón must be feeling quite left out by the hullabaloo.

Madrid limber up for the clash

The fact that the big event is only the last 16 has been largely overlooked in Spain. Such is the grandeur of the opposition that the clash has almost been billed as a semi-final. Indeed, Marca’s front page is already calling it Madrid’s “first final” en route to their tenth European title.

If Madrid do eventually hit the tenth at the eleventh time of asking it will have certainly been an adventure of Hobbit proportions. José Mourinho’s side will have faced the reigning title-holders in Holland, England and Germany in the group stages before the champions elect of England in the first knockout round.

LLL has its suspicions, though. If Madrid prevail and then run into the champions elect of Spain or Germany in the quarters, it would probably produce a swift return to the drawing board and new manager to oversee the project.

Unsurprisingly for a coach who is quite the fan of himself, the Champions League for Mourinho is more critical for his own personal glory than that of the club.

“Madrid want to win the tenth and I want the third. I’m not thinking about staying with two Champions League wins,” said the Madrid manager, who was cheeky with the English media and largely bolshy with the Spanish press on Tuesday evening.

Mourinho emerges from face of a giant robot owl

One question from the local media not unreasonably concerning Madrid’s approach to the game was answered with: “Today we’ve done our tactical work and you always know what we’ve done. The sources that you have that are sometimes mineral water and sometimes spoiled. You need to ask your sources.” Nope, LLL isn't entirely sure what Mourinho means either.

The destiny of the tie itself is very difficult to call. But there seems to be a large amount of certainty over how good the English leaders are and how bad this Madrid side is, 16 points off the top and light-years from the outfit that made it to the semi-finals last season.

The future is clearer for poor Valencia though, who crashed to a 2-1 defeat against PSG after being blown away in the first half of Tuesday’s game at the Mestalla.

“It was a match for closing your eyes when the ball went into Guaita’s area,” mourned Marca’s match report. The French side take both the lead and two away goals back to Paris.

“We were not good in the first half, we played with too much risk,” admitted Valencia coach Ernesto Valverde after the game, which saw a quartet of Champions League matches featuring Spanish teams getting off to a bad start.

PSG offer unknown menace in Mestalla as Marca rave over ‘bad boy’ Rooney

2013-02-12T10:39:00Z

PSG train in the Mestalla ahead of Tuesday evening's match

“Paris Saint Germain are the nouveau riche of Europe, but there are many things that money can’t buy - and that’s what Valencia have.”

These were the menacing words of the Spanish club’s French defender, Adil Rami, ahead of Tuesday’s Champions League clash - and he was speaking the truth on so many levels. Valencia have a whole load of stuff the money in the club’s bank account can’t buy, including the labour and materials needed to complete their half-built new stadium.

The French money-bags are in Mestalla-land for a game the local media are speaking of in terms such as 'intriguing' and 'enticing'. Basically, not many people have a clue what PSG are going to be like, seeing as very few give two hoots about Ligue 1.

Valencia coach Ernesto Valverde probably feels the same way, plumping for describing the opposition as “a great team with great players.” Then again, no-one really knows what Valencia are like these days either, given the fact the team flits between struggling to beat Celta Vigo, holding off Barcelona and getting thrashed by Real Madrid in a matter of weeks.

Although the rumble between Valencia’s back four and Zlatan Ibrahimovic could be tasty, there'll be more fun to be had watching the scramble for who gets to sit near David Beckham, who is not in the PSG squad but is set to be in the VIP ‘palco’ for the game. “A great player,” gushed Valverde, “but I don’t know what role he’ll play in the next few months at PSG.”

In preparation for Wednesday’s visit of Manchester United, it seems as if Marca has been getting itself into a bit of a homo-erotic frenzy at the thought of Wayne Rooney. The England forward is described in what are very admiring terms in Tuesday’s lead story: a “demon”, a “hooligan footballer” and a “bad boy”.

United’s visiting fans also get a mention, with the paper reporting that there is big scary danger from supporters who will be traveling without tickets and may try to force their way into the Santiago Bernabéu. “An avalanche of hooligans” frets the vapour-suffering paper, which does at least find the positive spin on the story. “They will leave a significant amount of euros, because we are talking about fans who drink great quantities of beer. Good for the bars.”

**********

A quick spot of housekeeping, the kind of which LLL is sometimes neglectful. The final match of round 23 of la Primera was played on Monday night, and saw Betis continue their iffy run with a goalless draw against visiting Valladolid. Although the Sevilla side huffed and puffed, Betis have now slipped to sixth thanks to four matches without a win or even a goal scored from open play. “For the third time, we’ve lost two points again,” lamented Betis boss, Pepe Mel.

Iniesta’s daylight robbery and Atlético's continued travel sickness

2013-02-11T11:41:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's Spanish expert Tim Stannard rounds up the best and worst of the weekend's La Liga action...

Good Day

Andrés Iniesta
The midday kick-off against Getafe certainly seemed to suit the midfielder, who was both nonchalant and brilliant in his midfield string-pulling, and looked a heck of lot less pale away from glaring floodlights. The easy-peasy 6-1 victory saw six different Barcelona players score. Even David Villa and Alexis Sánchez managed to find the back of the net, it was that simple.

Cristiano Ronaldo
The Portuguese bagged his second hat-trick in successive home games - with his treble against Sevilla following the one nabbed against Getafe. What’s more, Cristiano got to put his feet up for 30 minutes, after being substituted with the job against the visitors done and dusted early doors. Things went so smoothly that the returning Pepe even got to trot about in midfield without an international incident breaking out.

Isco
Not a bad few weeks at all for the Málaga star. An improved contract (and buy-out clause) a call-up for Spain, as well as four goals in three league games for his club side. A brace against Levante on Sunday (one from the spot after an outrageous flop from Julio Baptista) gave Málaga just their second league win since the start of the new year and holds off the challenge for fourth from Valencia just that little bit longer.

Nelson Valdez
The Valencia striker has come under a fair bit of criticism lately for not offering much to the cause, but the Paraguayan has shoved cash into his account (literally and metaphorically) with an injury time winner against Celta, five minutes after coming onto the pitch. Valencia edging ever closer to the Champions League places with their 1-0 victory.

Lass Bangoura
Just a couple of months ago, the Rayo forward was Arizmendi-like in his performances, which saw mis-hit passes, aimless shots and crosses finding the stands rather than teammates. But of late, the Guinean has been quite outstanding and continued a sparkling run of form with a goal and an assist in the 2-1 victory against Atlético Madrid that puts Rayo two points from the Champions League places and just five from the 42-point barrier.

Real Sociedad
A troubling week concerning the past of La Real played no part in preventing the team of the present continuing their outstanding form with a 2-1 win at Zaragoza that leaves the side unbeaten in five. The match was “easier than expected”, admitted manager Philippe Montanier.

Javier Aguirre
The Mexican manager took over an Espanyol side the bottom-of-the table. A 4-0 away win at Athletic Bilbao now sees the side eight points clear of danger. In what looks like being a win-win situation, the still popular Mauricio Pochettino also seems to be doing rather well at his new club.

Lucas Alcaraz
It was all very well for Granada to beat Real Madrid, as they managed last week. The big test was if the southerners could win away at Deportivo for three points that are equally as useful. The exam was passed with flying colours after a comfy 3-0 victory for Granada’s third win from four, and second for the new boss.

Bad Day

Atlético Madrid
This not-winning-away-from-home issue, is becoming a bit of a problem for Atlético Madrid, with a 2-1 loss at Rayo Vallecano seeing the club without a victory on their travels in eight matches in all competitions.

Levante
Levante's worrying spell of bad form continued with a 2-1 home defeat to Málaga. It's now four defeats from five for the Valencia side.

Getafe
Just the ten goals conceded in two league games against Barcelona this season. “There’s nothing to be said about this game,” admitted Luis García. “Forget it and move on to the next.”

Gorka Iraizoz
The 46 goals shipped by Athletic - the second worst record in the division - suggest that the Basque keeper isn’t having his best ever campaign. The footballer was already under pressure from the fans before a dithering performance in the 4-0 home defeat to Espanyol made matters even worse for poor Gorka. “The San Mamés clearly showed on other occasions little tolerance for our goalkeeper,” noted Marcelo Bielsa in his own special way.

Real Zaragoza
LLL still has a sneaky feeling, Zaragoza might go down. The side certainly will if their home form doesn’t improve sharpish. The 2-1 loss to Real Sociedad was the team’s seventh defeat in la Romareda this season, the worst in the division.

Héctor
The youth-team fullback was making his debut for Real Zaragoza in the clash against Real Sociedad. Unfortunately, it was a performance that lasted just 22 minutes after two bookings were picked up. “On one hand, I’m happy about my debut but on the other I’m also really down,” admitted the defender after the clash.

Mallorca & Osasuna
Although neither team lost in a 1-1 draw that can be politely described as dogged, it was a poor result for Mallorca who still only have one win in 18 league games, and could have done with beating a relegation rival at home. And it sucked more than a little for Osasuna, who were winning until injury time until a huge whack upfield from Dudu Aouate wasn’t dealt with, which in turn allow Pedro Geromel to pounce. “This indecision cost us dearly,” grumbled Osasuna coach, José Luis Mendilibar, who probably would have advised his defence of this in less polite terms after the match.

Celta Vigo
Ouch. The 1-0 defeat to Valencia arrived in the final, final, final, seconds of injury time with a header from Nelson Valdez. And it produced the same reaction from LLL as when the blog sees a Youtube video of a skateboarder crushing his doonickles on a metal stair railing. But without the evil chuckle. “At first the damage seems irreparable, then during the week you work on fixing it,” admitted a truly gutted Celta boss, Paco Herrera.

Domingos Paciencia
An outrageously bad seven days for Deportivo. A lame defeat at Getafe last weekend, protests at the training ground from fans, grumpy letters from supporters groups and now a terrible 3-0 home defeat to Granada with just the single shot on target. There was protests against the current regime in and outside the stadium - the latter needing the police intervention - and Deportivo boss, Domingos Paciencia, offered his resignation at the post match press conference.
“If saving Deportivo needs my departure, I’m at the club’s disposition,” advised the Portuguese coach who took over during la Liga’s winter break but has picked up just the single victory from six. That offer was snapped up early on Monday morning with the firing of poor old Paciencia after just six weeks in charge.

Getafe hoping to catch Barça still in their nighties in early kick-off

2013-02-08T10:55:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's man in Spain, Tim Stannard, casts an eye over the upcoming action in la Primera...

Saturday

Mallorca (19th) v Osasuna (17th) - 16.00 (all kick-offs local time)
And so it came to pass - Mallorca bid a fond farewell to Joaquín Caparrós after a stint of just over a year which saw the club challenging for a European spot last season, but racing like clueless puppies towards relegation this time around. The 3-0 defeat at Real Sociedad saw patience run out in the
Balearics, and a joint press conference was held on Monday with majority shareholder and Vice President, Lorenzo Serra Ferrer, sitting alongside Jokin in a joint goodbye. “I have no doubt we signed a great coach and are saying goodbye to a better person and a better coach,” fluffed Serra Ferrer.
Coming back for his third managerial spell at the club is Gregorio Manzano, who was Mallorca coach pre-Caparrós and pre-Laudrup and was unveiled on Tuesday. Unfortunately, there was a less than a joyful response to Manzano’s arrival, with calls for the coach’s sacking made already due to his acrimonious departure in 2010 and subsequent legal battle over supposedly unpaid wages.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Celta Vigo (18th) v Valencia (6th) - 18.00
A curious week for Valencia. Ever Banega turned up late for training last Friday, a little worse for wear, but then scored against Barcelona two days later. The vital Sofiane Feghouli is back from Africa Cup of Nations duty but returns facing possible criminal charges for driving about town without a license. After that, manager Ernesto Valverde was forced to fine himself for not turning up to Wednesday’s training after a morning flight from Bilbao was cancelled.
Meanwhile, David Albelda has announced that there was a “90%-95%” chance of the midfielder leaving Valencia, but that he’s not retiring. “My idea would be to try abroad. I’m not thinking about Spain.” LLL suggests another option and a club not too far away from Mestalla in the city which has a predilection for grizzled old war horses, that can also be a bit dirty on the side.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Levante (9th) v Málaga (4th) - 20.00
Málaga’s sale of Nacho Monreal to Arsenal is already starting to bite back, with stand-in left back Eliseu suffering a ligament knack and set to miss the clash against Levante. It echoes a complaint from Manuel Pellegrini before last week’s Zaragoza draw that “(Monreal’s) departure is very sad for the team. I understand you have to balance the economic side, but it’s affecting the sporting aspect a lot.”
The Chilean’s bosses also spoke to the media to explain what was a very sudden move in selling the defender for a fee that was too good to turn down. “No club can have players they can’t pay,” explained Mario Husillos, Málaga’s sporting director. “We have to drop the salary base. We have more costs than income.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Deportivo (20th) v Granada (16th) - 22.00
Uh oh, the fans are revolting. Some Deportivo supporters went along to Monday's training session to have a moan at a group of footballers who find themselves bottom of the table. Then it was the federation of supporters groups who issued a communication/rant against said players, who are firmly blamed for the team’s current predicament. “The fans demand the maximum effort. Deeds not promises, but above all that we give everything...” and so on and so on.
Despite the sanctimonious nature of the moan, Depor striker Riki seems to agree with the tone, saying that the footballers have indeed been letting themselves and everyone else down of late, especially during last week’s 3-1 defeat at Getafe. “We felt ashamed for the people who had travelled to see us there and who suffered because of what happened. We didn’t compete for 90 minutes and that can finish you off in the Primera division,” admitted a player who has gone five months without being paid, according to Marca. “We don’t know anything,” said Riki on when wages might start to reappear.
LLL - Home win

Real Madrid (3rd) v Sevilla (11th) - 22.00
Remember promising winger, Diego Perotti? These days, the Argentine is known as 'the permanently crocked Diego Perotti', with the Sevilla player having suffered seven injuries over the past two years, including back and cruciate ligament twangs. Unsurprisingly, the 24-year-old has had quite enough of this and is looking to spend a bit of time on loan in Argentina to help get his head and body back together. “I’m looking for a solution to my problem,” admitted Perotti. “I want to stay in Argentina for personal reasons aside from football. I’m broken in spirit and morale,” admitted the suffering Sevilla star.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Barcelona (1st) v Getafe (12th) - 12.00
Even Real Madrid have had to play at midday once a season - and with great success in terms of results and attendance - so it’s about time Barcelona took one for the television team, too. For the first time in 28 years, the Catalan club will be taking to field on what is still considered the early hours of Sunday morning in Spain. The team trying to catch Barça still in their nighties will be Getafe, who played at the same time in the Santiago Bernabéu a couple of weeks ago. Still, this hasn’t prevented striker Álvaro Vasquez from joking and joshing about having to get up before nine in the morning. “Let’s see if I can get some sleep...but I’m sure we’ll approach it like any other game.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Zaragoza (15th) v Real Sociedad (8th) - 17.00
Even before la Real’s 3-0 victory over Mallorca last weekend moved the San Sebastian club into eighth, two points off the Champions League places, there were still doubts over whether the current boss Philippe Montanier would be around to lead the side into Europe, should Real Sociedad eventually end up there in the upcoming campaign.
The contract of the Frenchman expires at the end of the season, and there’s still no word on whether Montanier will carry on despite fulfilling everything that’s required of the coach at the club and a little bit more besides. All that the Real Sociedad president would admit that there had not been “any contacts with any coach,” in regards to the future. “Montanier has not been in danger for any part of the season,” revealed a kindly Jokin Aperribay. “In fact, his relationship with la Real gets better every day. We’ll see who the coach is next year.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Athletic Bilbao (13th) v Espanyol (14th) - 19.00
Poor Fernando Llorente is looking like being even more of an outcast at Athletic than before, thanks partly to a revealing interview published in last Sunday’s AS - an isolation booth dangling above the stadium is the next move perhaps. “At Athletic, they’ve had enough of the attitude and way of behaving of Llorente who is provoking the indignation of the club’s management with his declarations,” squealed Marca.
The forward admitted that the decision to leave the club was fully realised when he was booed during the side’s opening Europa League clash of the season after stories appeared in the local press that the Juventus bound striker was demanding an awful lot of money to stay. “That’s when I knew I had to go.”
Llorente, a kindly soul deep down, also blames pressure from within the region for his decision to head to Serie A, noting that “certain local media have been attacking me day after day.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Rayo Vallecano (7th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 21.00
The future of Diego Simeone is becoming clearer - sort of. The Atlético manager’s contract runs out this summer, and seeing as the Argentine has been reasonably successful in his 14 month spell at the Vicente Calderón, everyone would quite like El Cholo to sign on for more fun as soon as possible.
Wednesday’s edition of AS insists that the deal will be completed this month, with the only disagreements at the moment being in regards to assurances from Atlético’s owners that the current squad won’t be dismantled. “At the moment, he’s the soul of the club,” admitted Atleti’s Sporting Director, José Luis Caminero, to Marca, “we are having conversations with him every day.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Monday

Betis (5th) v Valladolid (10th) - 21.30
The problem with Betis this season, is that the side is outperforming its existing resources by about three league places. This leaves everyone in Seville getting a bit panic stricken when Betis have a relatively poor run in la Liga. On this occasion it consists of a draw and two defeats, although the fact that there hasn’t been a goal from open play in those matches doesn’t look fantastic.
In an interview with Marca, Pepe Mel, patiently tries to explain to fans that survival is still aim number one for his club, and then maybe European qualification. “For the moment, the Betis objective is to beat Valladolid and nothing more.” The part-time author also has a little something to say on the problems of running a football team in the chaos of the Spanish League. “It’s very hard to organise a week when you don’t know when or at what time you are going to be playing.” Picky pants, says LLL.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Spain shun domestic strife as Del Bosque chases record in Doha

2013-02-06T11:00:00Z

The attention span of the Spanish public may be too stretched to fully embrace Wednesday’s intriguing-looking friendly against Uruguay, which is quite naturally being played in Qatar.

A series of domestic political scandals and the murmuring surrounding suggested doping and global match-fixing in football had La Liga Loca’s vegetable vendor of choice shrugging his shoulders for five solid minutes on Wednesday morning, not knowing where to start with his daily rant. Being a busy bee, the blog had to leave him in suspended animation, while taking its kilo of potatoes back to HQ for tonight’s Cottage Pie.

“Every TV news is a horror show. The World Cup in Qatar whiffs of trouble; Real Sociedad have become mixed up in ‘Operación Puerto’ and Europol uncovers a match-fixing network,” frets AS editor Alfredo Relaño in Wednesday’s edition. It’s the second of this list that is currently the talk of football town, with the scandal a legal minefield of accusations and denials involving a former club president, the current president of the Spanish League and even a former Minister of Sport.

If past experience of these kind of reports in Spain is anything to go by, it could either be ground-shaking news that causes heads to roll, or will quietly go away with nobody particularly keen on opening this particular can of worms then having to sweep the wriggling contents under the carpet.

The latest jolly for Vicente del Bosque’s medal-clad money-makers is a trip to Qatar, a pleasant change of scene after a recent Central America vibe which saw friendlies against Puerto Rico, Costa Rica and Panama.

Del Bosque's boys lark about during a training session in Doha

The photographs from the most recent of those expeditions were of footballers particularly non-plussed by the country’s canal. Wednesday’s newspapers have the same group trying a little harder to look enthused while posing for pictures with members of the Qatari royal family. While the team are in Doha, la Selección will also be playing a game of football against Uruguay - as well as meeting another dignitary, in the form of Raúl.

It’s a bit of a shame that what is an unusually tasty friendly against the Copa América champions - a team with players people have actually heard of - is taking place so far away and kicking off at 19:00 Spanish time, so many will miss it out. On the plus side, the match is at least being televised, unlike October's World Cup qualifier in Belarus, for which no television company was willing or able to stump up the cash.

As with every game for Spain, wherever and whenever it happens to be played, Vicente Del Bosque has done his duty by defending the motivation. The Doha clash is “fully justified, as it’s the venue for the 2022 World Cup,” says the manager, who is set to equal the record of 68 matches as national coach, set by Ladislao Kubala between 1969 and 1980. The Uruguay clash also sees Carles Puyol making his 100th appearance for his country, just over 12 years after his first. The haircut, though, remains unchanged.

Del Bosque is once again set to play with a 'false nine' in the form of Cesc Fabregas, with his real No.9s either suffering from a lack of minutes with their clubs - David Villa or Fernando Llorente spring to mind - or suffering from being Fernando Torres. There is, though, mild interest to see whether Isco will get a run-out, with the Málaga man set to become itsy-bitsy, fancy playmaker option no.28 for his country.

For once, the world and European champions may actually take a friendly game seriously, in the knowledge that Uruguay will be their normal competitive selves and have players with the quality to dish out the pain when need be. The clash may be another money-making match for the country’s FA but for once it’s a game worth playing.

Atlético once again demonstrate bouncebackability in win over gobby Betis

2013-02-04T13:21:00Z

Good Day

Diego Costa
Nobody seems to be best of friends on the pitch with the pugnacious Atlético Madrid striker, who was spat at by Betis defender Antonio Amaya, but the Rojiblanco massive certainly has big love for the Brazilian forward after he came on a second half substitute to head home a corner. Atlético Madrid have now won 21 from 21 in the Vicente Calderón in all competitions in a 1-0 win over Betis in a clash where it was a miracle that there wasn’t a single sending off in a marvelously ill-tempered affair.
Oh yes. Six is the number of times that Atlético Madrid have dropped points in la Liga this season and also the number of times the side has bounced back with a victory.

Julio Baptista
The shed-sized Málaga forward was back playing football after an absence of 16 months and two days due to injury.

Ever Banega
The trouble-seeking Valencia midfielder found himself in the news once again this weekend, after turning up five minutes late for Friday's training session and reportedly looking like he had had an eventful evening. Ever made up for yet another mini-scandal by helping his team to a 1-1 draw against a tired looking Barcelona, wiping out the all too recent memory of the 5-0 loss to Real Madrid a fortnight ago.
“Today we saw a different Valencia, with a lot of effort, pressure, winning back the ball and getting forward,” said a pleased Ernesto Valverde whose side are edging ever closer to the fourth Champions League spot.

Real Sociedad
A comprehensive 3-0 win over Mallorca keeps la Real on track for a cheeky run at the European places.

Valladolid & Athletic Bilbao
Both sides make the happy section after a proper belting, ‘trouble at mill’, pigeon-fancying northern encounter on Friday night. The clash finished 2-2, but it could have been a heck of a lot more. Valladolid take another step forward in a very solid season that should see a comfy mid-table finish, while Athletic continue a steady improvement that’s being helped enormously by other players aside from Ariz Aduriz actually managing to come up with some goals.

Sevilla
The revival continues under Unai Emery, who is delivering on his promise to restore the form of a host of first-team players rather than buy new ones in the winter window. The temporary downside is that the footballer who has most benefited from this resurgence, Ivan Rakitic, will be missing the visit to the Santiago Bernabéu next week after picking up two yellows in a match where he opened the scoring for his side in a 2-1 win over Rayo Vallecano.

Getafe
Deportivo did a dutiful job on Saturday by popping along to the Coliseum and losing 3-1, giving Getafe their first victory in eight games. Depor even had a one man and one goal advantage for some of the encounter after Getafe keeper Miguel Angel Moya was sent off early doors after giving away a penalty. That imbalance was equalled in the 70th minute with the red card for Abel Aguilar. It was at this point that Getafe grabbed a couple of goals to finish off what had been a 1-1 stalemate. “The team was spectacular,” beamed Luis García.

Javier Aguirre
The flat-topped fighter continues to lead Espanyol to an impressive run that sees just the single defeat in nine, since the Mexican manager arrived at the club at the end of November. That defeat came at the Camp Nou, so it was hardly a huge cause of shame for the Pericos. The latest win was a 3-2 victory over Levante, another top Saturday night clash, and a fourth win in Cornellà in a row in la Primera.

Zaragoza
Much, much better from a Zaragoza side that has been a poor one of late. The 1-1 draw at Málaga continues a run of five matches without a win in la Liga but Zaragoza were just a puppy’s pillow from snatching everything in la Rosaleda. “I’m leaving with the feeling of having lost two points,” admitted Zaragoza coach, Manolo Jiménez.

Granada
Like many sides this season who have taken points off Real Madrid, Granada did not need to do a huge amount aside from work hard, put in some decent tackles and concentrate. However, there was a spring in the Andalusian side’s step with the arrival of latest coach, Lucas Alcaraz, and some new players up front, although the home side didn’t have a single shot on goal. Then again, Granada didn’t need to thanks to the ever prolific Cristiano Ronaldo.

Osasuna
A video campaign to get the home fans behind the side which featured some grizzled men yelling did the trick for Osasuna, who opted for the team’s normal route one football and eventually found a breakthrough in a 1-0 win against fellow strugglers Celta Vigo. The victory sees Osasuna putting back-to-back wins in Pamplona against relegation rivals and moves the side out of the drop zone by a point.

Bad Day

Barcelona
Two points lost in the title race - look, LLL is trying to make things sound exciting - have enabled Atlético Madrid to close the gap at the top to nine points.

Real Madrid
José Mourinho attempted a bit of a moan about the fixture calendar and having to play on Saturday when Barça took to the field against Valencia on Sunday, but it was a half-hearted affair. The real targets of Mourinho’s ire were the footballers such as Gonzalo Higuaín and Angel di María that did not start Real Madrid’s clash against Barcelona. It doesn’t take the squeeze of Iker Casillas to recognise that this is a team who are not at ease with their manager and have completely lost any motivation to compete in la Liga.

José Mourinho
“You say when we win, it’s self-management and when we lose it’s the fault of the coach,” complained the Madrid manager to the press after the Granada defeat, the fifth on the road in la Liga this season, and the fourth in Andalusia. “Mourinho cries a lot. Too much. You could hire him for funerals and burials,” was the response from Roberto Palomar writing in Marca.

Manuel Pellegrini
The Málaga coach does not appear to be a happy chappy at the moment, and that’s not entirely unsurprising with footballers continuing to be sold from under his Chilean nose - “I understand you have to balance the economic side but it’s affecting the sporting side”, said Pellegrini after the sale of Nacho Monreal - and having to play on a pitch at home that the manager has been complaining about for some time. “We can’t string two passes together,” retorted Pellegrini after the 1-1 draw with Zaragoza.

Betis
The defeat in the Vicente Calderón continues an iffy run for the Sevilla side that sees Betis three matches without a win.

Levante
Tired legs in are starting to set in as Levante get closer to their main target of the campaign - the 42 points survival mark. The team are still three wins short of this after a 3-2 defeat at Espanyol that sees four defeats the Levante’s last six league games.

Celta Vigo
Lamentable away form from Celta which has produced just four points from 12 games continued with a 1-0 defeat at Osasuna. “We didn’t do anything well,” complained Paco Herrera who was forced to watch the game from the press area due to suspension along with rival coach, José Luis Mendilibar. “The worst Celta I’ve seen this year,” said the former Liverpool trainer on a team with just the single win from nine.

Mallorca
It just gets worse and worse for the Balearic side which is now second-from-bottom. The defeat at Real Sociedad sees Mallorca with one win in 17 and Bernd Schuster reportedly waiting in the wings to take over from Joaquín Caparrós.

Deportivo
LLL still has a feeling the Galicians are going to stay up but that’s mainly reliant on Deportivo winning a game away from home, which the side have failed to do this season in la Liga. “There are nerves and you can feel this,” admitted defender, Manuel Pablo, after the 3-1 defeat at Getafe.

La Liga Preview: Messi heckles Arbeloa in car park

2013-02-01T12:19:00Z

FRIDAY

Valladolid (10th) v Athletic Bilbao (13th) – 21.30
On Monday, LLL attributed Athletic’s 3-0 win over Atlético Madrid – a victory Óscar de Marcos muses might have been the best performance of the season – to the previous day's training-ground visit of a magician the previous day to show his illusional stuff. Defender Mikel San José, kicked off the scoring, spoke about the special session given by ‘Oliver’ and opined that “these things either help or not,” perhaps recalling the great clown disaster that dogged Espanyol’s 1982 campaign.

“However, it made us better and if we have to do it again, we will.” After a bit of digging, Marca have discovered that the magician was already known to a few members of the Athletic squad, and that Javi Martínez was quite the fan, having learned a few tricks himself. Like how to escape from Athletic, a move that Fernando Llorente clearly struggled with.
LLL Prediction – Away win

SATURDAY

Osasuna (18th) v Celta Vigo (16th) – 16.00
As any right-minded football fan will know, Sevilla’s goalkeeping galavanting is always a thrilling affair. So it was quite the treat when Angry Andrés Palop saw off another contender to his No.1 shirt with this week's return of Diego López to Real Madrid after just half a season in Andalusia.

You might ask what this has to do with Celta Vigo. Well, early last summer, the 39-year-old hater of young-punk challengers chased away young Sevilla rival Javi Varas, who was lent to Celta Vigo despite being 11 years younger and playing in 25 league games last season. Asked yesterday whether any of these moves would make a difference to his long-term plans, Sevilla-born Varas dutifully claimed that his “focus is 100% with Celta.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Getafe (12th) v Deportivo (20th) – 18.00
When Deportivo boss Domingos Paciencia said that Saturday’s opponents Getafe are “don’t have difficult processes, but easy, good ones,” LLL hoped for a rare instance of someone in football predicting that the opposition are about to get one hell of a beating.

But apparently not, with Depor’s Portuguese boss reckoning Getafe’s apparent simplicity means the match “is not going to be easy.” Deportivo only have the single functioning centre-back – and that’s Zé Castro – so even Getafe’s less-than-prolific strike force will find the target on Saturday.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Espanyol (15th) v Levante (8th) – 20.00
Time for a good-news story. Espanyol midfielder Felipe Mattioni might well feature in a starting XI for the first time in two years and eight months after suffering cruciate ligament injuries to both knees (shudder). The Brazilian is set to be drafted in at full-back by Javier Aguirre, what with no one else about due to suspension and injury, but Mattioni is unsurprisingly unfussed over what happens to him on Saturday evening. “If I end up on the bench in the end that doesn’t matter because it’s been so long now.”
LLL Prediction – Draw

Granada (17th) v Real Madrid (3rd) – 22.00
In many ways, Juan Antonio Anquela’s firing on Wednesday morning might have been the best thing for the mental and physical wellbeing of the now ex-Granada boss, as the 55-year-old didn’t seem to be enjoying his first spell of coaching in top-flight football.

“I lost a job, but at least I got a life back,” said the ex-Alcorcón gaffer, flicking through holiday brochures. “I’m sorry I wasn’t able to enjoy this team, this level and above all, this city. Football didn’t want me to be happy. It was the chance I was waiting for all my life.”

His replacement Lucas Alcaraz, returning to the club he coached 18 years ago, has been given brand new attacking players Nolito and Diego Buonanotte, although it remains to be seen how much of the ball they get against the champions.
LLL Prediction – Away win

SUNDAY

Málaga (4th) v Zaragoza (14th) – 12.00
What Málaga giveth with one hand, the club’s owners doth forthwith taketh away with the other. At the beginning of the week they improved the contract of the wonderful Isco, which increases his buy-out clause – due to be triggered in June, no doubt – from €21m to €35m.

But then a bit of deadline-day selling saw midfielder Diego Buonanotte moving to Granada (no great loss) and the whopping surprise of the sale of Nacho Monreal to Arsenal. Málaga have now sold €41.6m in players since the end of last season, spending nothing in return. Maybe some money will be available now to buy a new pitch.
LLL Prediction – Home

Sevilla (11th) v Rayo Vallecano (6th) – 17.00
Raúl Tamudo, the striker who kept Rayo up last season with a ludicrously late goal in the final seconds of the season, has returned to the club after a short spell in Mexico with Pachuca. The 35-year-old is the club's third January signing, joining centre-backs Jordi (another returning Rayo old boy) and Anaitz Arbilla.

There was a bit of a to-do though over Brazilian striker Gabriel Machado, whom Rayo had brought in from Steaua Bucharest and then loaned out to Hércules – briefly. Machado only lasted two days in Alicante after the receiving club claimed that the footballer wouldn't be ready to play for at least two months due to injury. “Rayo told us that he would be ready in 15 to 20 days,” complained Hércules coach Quique Hernández, staring furiously at the terms and conditions on the footballer’s label.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valencia (7th) v Barcelona (1st) – 19.00
Valencia president Manuel Llorente isn't especially liked at the moment by the fans – to be fair, no-one at the club ever is – but in an interview with local TV, Llorente says that he can handle the haters: “I prefer that they boo me rather than the team.” However, this tolerance has its limits, says the big Mestalla boss: if someone comes to the club “with a loaf of bread under one arm” then he’ll be out the door never to return.

Speaking of Mestalla-style madness, Leo Messi was reportedly all with the fury after the Real Madrid cup clash, with reports in the Spanish media claiming that the wee Barça man heckled Alvaro Arbeloa in the Santiago Bernabéu car park before being led off by a member of the Barcelona party. Fight! Fight! Fight!
LLL Prediction – Away win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Betis (5th) – 21.00
Rather like a see-saw featuring Maniche and a couple of sacks of flour, the Copa del Rey tie between Atlético Madrid and Sevilla is finely balanced after the Rojiblancos beat the Andalusians 2-1 in Thursday's stupidly late 10pm kick-off. It was a made affair at the Vicente Calderón featuring three penalties and three sendings off – two for Sevilla, one for Atlético – with pretty much every one of these incidents involving handballs, either accidental or not.
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY

Real Sociedad (9th) v Mallorca (19th) – 21.00
At this moment, LLL would like to put on its dinner suit and formally welcome Alan Hutton to la Liga after the right-back joined struggling Mallorca on loan. “I hope to give everything that’s expected of me here until the end of the season,” said the former Nottingham Forest man.

“It’s exciting to be able to come to play in Spain. For me, this is a new project, a new league and a new country. What’s more there’s there a player here that I get along with and speaks really well of this club,” said Hutton, discussing the legend that is Giovani dos Santos, the footballer that LLL claimed many moons ago was the new Ronaldinho.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Sara Carbonero reveals all as Tito Vilanova watches via the Internet

2013-01-30T11:26:00Z

"You and your big mouth..."

Like a saucy spat between two fiery Latino lovers, the bust-up between Marca and Real Madrid finished as quickly as it began - and just as it was starting to look fun, too.

Late last week, Florentino Pérez and the paper were airing their dirty laundry in public, each implying that the other had their lying underwear clearly ablaze over the issue of an alleged dressing room revolt against José Mourinho.

Fortunately, Sara Carbonero - squeeze of Iker Casillas - seems to have addressed that particular issue by revealing to Mexican TV channel Televisa Deportes that “at the moment, there is a division in the dressing room.” It was a declaration that must have had the crocked Madrid goalkeeper waving his one functioning hand in frustration, the same hand he'll be using to cover his eyes in fear on Wednesday, should stand-in stopper Antonio Adán be playing in goal for his team.

Tho two sides had bonked and made up by Saturday, with Marca ditching the previous two days' narrative by running a front page declaration that Cristiano Ronaldo was set to be the “di Stefano of the 21st century” - and not by playing international football for about 18 different countries. “Madrid are building a future project around Cristiano,” panted the paper in the biggest non-story since the last one.

The renewed willingness to tow the party line and put the muzzle back on comes just in time for the fourth Clásico of the season, the halfway mark of what could be eight if the two teams meet in the Champions League, Merciful Zeus forbids. In terms of history, Wednesday night’s Copa del Rey semi-final first leg game at the Santiago Bernabéu is number 223 between the pair, with Madrid currently in front with 88 wins to Barça’s 87.

See, we can all play nicely...sort of

LLL has a feeling those scores may well be evened out by 11pm Spanish time, with a makeshift Madrid back line of Michael Essien, Raphael Varane, Ricardo Carvalho and Alvaro Arbeloa set to spend 90 minutes chasing Leo Messi, Andrés Iniesta, Pedro, David Villa and Cesc Fabregas. Not even the unique comedy stylings of Barça’s own second-choice net-tender, José Pinto, are likely to be enough to even things out - but the 37-year-old is sure to give it a darn good go regardless.

This sense of doom is shared by the Madrid papers, with Wednesday’s editions bigging up the magnificence of the affair, rather than the chances of Real Madrid of winning it. “The best against the best,” yells Marca, while AS claim "The Cup needs a king". Over in the Catalan capital, a confident Sport claim Real Madrid can “look but not touch the Copa del Rey” whilst the more laid back Mundo Deportivo is excited about “a Clásico with everything,” on a front cover featuring both Leo Messi and Sara Carbonero.

AS reports that Tito Vilanova - currently in New York, receiving treatment for his illness - will be in constant contact with Jordi Roura on the Barcelona bench through What’s App. However, it seems the Catalan has been having issues finding Barcelona games on his television, so has been watching live-streams. LLL can’t imagine what it must be like for poor Tito to have a commentator from a former Russian republic yelling “Messi....Messi....M” only for the feed to freeze as the Argentinean is bearing down on the Real Madrid goal.

Yet Vilanova won’t be the only person in a far-flung corner of the planet desperately trying to catch a glimpse of the fixture anyway he can. There may be an average of approximately 19 Clásicos a year these days, but these games always deliver, whether it be Mourinho doing something insane or Ronaldo and Messi being generally brilliant and scoring tons of goals.

Miss it at your peril, puny humans.

Bielsa's Athletic finally pull a rabbit from the hat, as Atlético left humbled

2013-01-29T11:34:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's Spanish correspondent, Tim Stannard, sums up the latest round of La Liga action...

Good Day

Barcelona
The 5-1 demolition of the ten men of Osasuna was the fifth time Barça had scored five in la Liga this season. Not bad going, really.

Leo Messi
In the aforementioned rout, Lionel Messi netted four more goals, taking his tally for the season to 33. It’s a total that by LLL’s simple calculations will see the Argentinean scoring 58 league goals if this hit-rate continues, smashing the rather paltry looking record of 50 notched by...er...Leo Messi last season.

Cristiano Ronaldo
His weekend hat-trick against Getafe was the quickest of Portuguese player’s career - nine minutes and 31 seconds. Seeing as both sides are going to suck up a fair amount of publicity in the next few days due to their cup clash, that’s all LLL will say on Real Madrid and Barcelona for the time being...

Málaga
Like Valencia, Málaga are chasing a Champions League spot but were distracted a little by the Copa del Rey in recent weeks. Málaga’s 3-2 victory at Mallorca - one which saw some tasty goals along the way - was the southern side’s first in four in la Liga and plonks them back into fourth spot.

Piti
The Rayo Vallecano forward had a fairly eventful day on Sunday. Before his team's clash with Betis, he received a plaque for reaching the total of 200 games for the club since his debut in the third tier of Spanish football in 2006/07. Piti then opened the scoring for Rayo from the spot for his tenth league goal of the season, helping Rayo in another impressive home performance and a 3-0 victory.
Rayo are now in sixth - sixth! - one point from the Champions League places, but more importantly for the side’s fundamental ambitions, about three more wins from safety for the season.

Valencia
It had been an immensely trying and enormously distracting week for Valencia, with three successive games with Real Madrid that saw referee-inspired sulks, a 5-0 league tonking, a disaster from Jonas and the eventual departure from the Copa del Rey. The ding-dong 3-2 victory against Deportivo gave the Mestalla men a footballing enema, with Valencia picking up all three points in injury time, thanks to a Ricardo Costa effort.

Levante
It was an own goal in injury time for Antonio Rukavina that gave Levante a 2-1 win over Valladolid, but it was enough to halt what was something of a mini-slump by the Valencia side's imperious standards; one which consisted of two league defeats.
“Anyone could have won the game. The victory was at a good time after the last two bad matches, and now we have 33 big points,” noted Levante boss, Juan Ignacio Martínez. Just three more victories before his eighth-placed team can relax properly with the 42 barrier broken.

Unai Emery
A comprehensive 3-0 win over Granada on Monday night sees Unai Emery working his magic over the Andalusian club, although the new manager was keen to keep things on the lowdown. “We have taken a step forward but we were not so bad before but neither were we so good in this game.”

Athletic Bilbao
So all that was needed in the end was a bit of card-trickery. That was the idea that popped into the mad head of Marcelo Bielsa on the day before Sunday’s clash at Atlético Madrid, with the Argentinean noting that his players were looking a little tense. To be fair, the Athletic boss is probably the root cause of an awful lot of those feelings. However, Bielsa arranged for a magician, no less, to come to the training ground to give the footballers something to smile about, perhaps involving rabbits, and it worked with a 3-0 win over visiting Atlético to put a temporary halt to a New Year slump for the club.

Bad Day

Atlético Madrid
A team without Falcao, Gabi and Miranda, the spine of the Rojiblancos, came a-crashing in San Mamés against Athletic Bilbao for only the side’s fourth league defeat of the season. Once again, onlookers searching for the possible end to Atlético’s superb league season need to see that it’s the constant winning that’s the unsettling, unusual aspect to the club rather than the occasional losses.

Betis
A cup run and an ultimately unsuccessful double-header against Atlético Madrid took a bit of the steam out of Betis, with the side picking up just one point from six. However, the fully focussed Seville side is still tied with points with fourth-placed Málaga in what is turning out to be a fascinating battle for the Champions League places.

Sergio Ballesteros
The 37-year-old quietly leaving the pitch after 30 minutes may not have been that surprising a sight considering the Levante defender’s not so tender years, but it was the first time in the footballer’s career of 19 seasons and 381 games that Ballesteros had been forced to depart a game early through injury. The Levante legend’s beanstalk of brilliance grows yet higher.

Getafe
With Abdelaziz Barrada, Pedro León, and Angel Lafita all missing, Getafe were left without much creativity in the side against Real Madrid. All that was left was a firm rear-guard action, which did last for a while, until Getafe began to be stretched in the second half and Madrid popped up with four goals. “Every coach can see how they come out on the counter attack and we worked to stop them, but no-one has managed it. If you don’t finish off your moves with Real Madrid, they are going to run at you and kill you off,” admitted Getafe boss, Luis García.

Zaragoza, Espanyol
Lots of talk in Sunday’s papers of oblivion, zero, nothing and yet more nothing as these too Scrappy Doo clubs fought out a goalless draw. “An ugly game with few chances,” admitted Espanyol coach, Javier Aguirre, after a clash that AS described as being between two teams arguing, rather than playing football.

Paco Herrera
As per every game, the Celta coach had lost his voice by the time he spoke to the media after another 90 minutes. As usual, passionate Paco was shouting away on the touchlines, although it eventually got him into trouble and sent to the stands.
It was easy to see why Herrera was feeling so chippy, as the 1-1 draw with Real Sociedad saw another example of a referee sending off a player due to a yellow card for a handball, irrespective of whether it was ball-to-hand or vice versa. The footballer in question was Augusto Fernández who was sent to the dressing rooms with Celta Vigo 1-0 up at the time. “The ref can blow for a handball if he wants, but it was involuntary as he had no intention of blocking the ball.” The point for Celta against an inform la Real was a handy one but still leaves the Galicians with just the single Primera win in eight.

Mallorca
The problem with insisting before an upcoming games that it’s a ‘final’ and a crucial part of a survival bid is that when it’s lost, everything looks a little bleak. Mallorca are suffering from that blowback on Monday after a 3-2 defeat to Málaga in the Balearics. “I’m strong, but we all know the law of football,” admitted manager, Joaquín Caparrós, whose team have now picked up just the single league win from the past 16 games. And that’s not good.

Riki
The Deportivo striker scored two brilliant goals for his side, but the Galicians still came away as losers after the 3-2 home defeat to Valencia. Deportivo continue to be stuck to the bottom of the table after just two wins in the past 20 league games. Not looking too good for the destitute Galicia side at all.

Deportivo in yet more strife as local restaurant calls in unpaid €100,000 tab

2013-01-25T15:30:00Z

FourFourTwo's Spanish expert Tim Stannard looks ahead to the weekend's La Liga action...

Saturday

Celta Vigo (17th) v Real Sociedad (9th) - 16.00
La Liga Loca caught Nihat Kahveci and Darko Kovacevic speaking on radio station Cadena Ser this week, chatting wistfully about the days of yore when the pair lead the line for Real Sociedad and came within a cat’s fur ball of winning La Liga ten years ago. Those kind of crazy days when either Barcelona or Real Madrid had actual, breathing challengers for the title have been harder to come by of late.
In fact, the league has become as uncompetitive as the Daily Mail’s idea of a leftie school’s sports day, so much so that a visit to the town hall to wave at the gathered adoring masses below are afforded to teams who beat one of the Primera pair in a single game. For this reason, the Real Sociedad squad were invited the festivities for San Sebastian Day on Monday, and by the goats of Zeus, it actually looked like good fun. Especially if you like drums.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Levante (8th) v Real Valladolid (10th) - 18.00
Valladolid, like Rayo and every other club that gets saddled with the kick-off time in question, don’t like Mondays. Or Fridays. Although the side’s upcoming clash falls on a Saturday, the following week’s fixture against Athletic Bilbao has been scheduled for a Friday, causing a serious impact to the club’s finances according to Valladolid president, Carlos Suárez.
The Valladolid head cites the example of a round nine game against Real Sociedad, which took place on Monday October 29th. “We estimated between 2,500 and 3,000 coming down from San Sebastian and it the end 200 came,” said Suárez blaming the scheduling of the fixture on a work day. “We expected €75,000 income, it was €5,500 and we lost €69,500. Bilbao is even nearer, so it’s even more money.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Zaragoza (13th) v Espanyol (15th) - 20.00
Mauricio Pochettino was back in Barcelona this week, but on what Perico noses would describe as the stinky side of town, with the former Espanyol boss taking his new Southampton charges to train at Barça’s facilities. Some of his players even took time out to visit the Camp Nou museum for a nosey about, too.
Meanwhile, current boss, Javier Aguirre, continues to make great strides at the club which is now moving towards mid-table. However, the journey is not a picturesque one, even according the team’s own players. Here’s Joan Capdevila admitting that “our football isn’t pretty but it works. “At the end you don’t remember if you’ve had a great match or not, simply whether we picked up more points,” continued the fullback.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Deportivo (20th) v Valencia (7th) - 22.00
You’d have thought when the restaurant tab had crept up to €10,000 and remained unpaid that the owners might have thought something was amiss at Deportivo. That bill eventually hit €106,000, leaving short-changed eaterie El Manjar as just one of many creditors that form part of the group owed a total of €93m by the football club that has just gone into administration. Others probably waiting in vain for what’s theirs include Alberto Luque - who is still €2m out of pocket despite leaving in 2005. Indeed, a total of €9.7m is owed to current or former players. Then there’s the €40m due to the tax department, €34m to banks....
LLL Prediction - Draw

Sunday

Real Madrid (3rd) v Getafe (11th) - 12.00
When families fight, it’s always a bit nasty - but it's still thoroughly entertaining when it takes place somewhere public, like a pizza house. Real Madrid did the big club equivalent of that, in what is now fundamentally a squabble between two parties calling each other big fibbers. And long may it continue. While Friday’s Marca responds to Florentino Pérez's rebuttal of their story suggesting players had threatened to leave the club over the summer if José Mourinho remains, by sniffing that they are not lying, AS have kept their eye on the real ball by reminding everyone that Iker Casillas is set to be out for the next two months. Which potentially means Antonio Adán in goal for matches against Barcelona in the Copa del Rey and la Liga and the small matter of a double header against Manchester United. Oh dear.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Rayo Vallecano v Betis - 17.00
A decent cup run for Betis ended on Thursday with a 3-1 aggregate defeat to Atlético Madrid, but seeing as the club are genuine contenders for the Champions League places, the knock-out may not necessarily be a bad thing. Rayo have also got Europe on their minds, or at least bagging 42 points as soon as possible so the side can knock off early for the season.
Leo Baptistao may return after missing last week’s defeat at Granada, and there’s still talk in the town that a move to Atlético Madrid is imminent for the striker, especially after the Brazilian was spotted at the Calderón for a recent clash between the Rojiblancos and Zaragoza.
“I prefer that he’s out seeing a match than stuck somewhere else or at home playing on his console,” said Rayo Sporting Director, Felipe Miñambres, claiming that the footballer was only at the stadium at the invitation of friend and Atlético player, Diego Costa, with no other motive involved. “What is certain is that Leo will keep playing with us until the end of the campaign.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Spot the difference. Okay, don't bother...

Barcelona (1st) v Osasuna (18th) - 19.00
Yes, Barcelona went through to the semi-finals of the cup in a 6-4 aggregate thriller against Málaga, but the big story is that LLL finally worked out who stand-in Barça boss Jordi Roura (above) resembles, thanks to the blog's wonderful Twitter followers. The highlights of the responses are - an extra playing a French peasant in a film, an Ent from Lord of the Rings, Fred Flintstone, Bergerac, Gerard Depardieu, Alfred Molina, Jay Leno and Griff Rhys Jones. Good work.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Athletic Bilbao (14th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 21.00
Just as one soap opera ends at Athletic, with this week's announcement that Fernando Llorente will be joining Juventus next summer, others are only just beginning, the best being that Iker Muniain will be joining Pep Guardiola at Bayern Munich in the summer. However, for that to happen, the forward is going to have to buck his football ideas up a little bit with the wee nipper admitting that “for the past few months, I’ve not felt good physically or mentally, but I’m beginning to feel better and I hope to keep going.”
With stories over little Iker, Llorente and the renovation of the contract of Fernando Amorebieta’s there’s not been too much talk about footie in Bilbao of late, although that’s not a bad thing really considering how pants the team has been. “It would be much nicer to talk about football and Sunday’s match,” admitted Ibai Gómez.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mallorca (19th) v Málaga (5th) - 21.00
Mallorca manager Joaquín Caparrós is still hanging on in there, despite his team’s defeat at Espanyol last weekend plonking them right in the relegation zone. It’s no wonder defender Emilio Nsue has hit the ‘final’ button by declaring that Sunday’s game against visiting Málaga is all or nothing for the Balearic bottom-strugglers. At least until the next fixture comes along, anyway. “We need to be strong at home in the second half of the season and win nearly all our games here,” opined Nsue, revealing that “the game against Málaga is a final for us.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Sevilla (12th) v Granada (16th) - 21.00
Granada are renowned wheeler-dealers, so a bit of transfer window movement is expected from the Andalusian club to shake up what has been a bit of a lifeless market in a largely destitute la Liga. The club’s president, Quique Pina, revealed that he has been trying to bring in former Barça forward man, Nolito, from Benfica but that the Portuguese team wanted a footballer in return, thought to be Guiherme Siqueira. Pina also mentioned that a €4.5m bid from Besiktas had been turned down for mega-flop forward Youssef El-Arabi, who cost €5m over the summer but has scored just four league goals. What do you mean you stopped reading at the word ‘Granada’?
LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia and Sevilla in battle to seduce their supporters

2013-01-23T14:38:00Z

It is estimated that around 10,000 fans had left Mestalla by half-time on Sunday night, with Valencia already 5-0 down against Real Madrid. Part of the battle for the east coast club is going to be getting those part-time, fair-weather fans back again for the two teams' third clash in eight days.

The final of this particular trilogy, one that LLL is desperately hoping finishes with greater drama and brevity than that Lord of the Rings business, is Wednesday’s Copa del Rey quarter-final second leg – which Valencia are losing 2-0 after last Tuesday's defeat in the Santiago Bernabéu.

Ernesto Valverde is supremely optimistic that the Valencia fans will be back disgustedly waving hankies at the players and club president after another defeat. The home team manager notes sagely that “if they all left the other day it’s because they came in the first place, and that’s because of the good game we played in the Bernabéu.”

Mr Brightside: Ernesto Valverde

Another important factor to get the fans to return – aside from fresh memories of humiliation and the need for Valencia to score at least two and keep a clean sheet – is the stat that Real Madrid have now scored 17 goals in their last four visits to Mestalla. Roberto Soldado joining David Albelda on the sidelines probably isn't a fantastic omen either, so it’s no wonder Wednesday's Marca front page spooks that “the terror of Mestalla returns”.

If Real Madrid should progress as expected, despite football being a funny old game, then they will face either Málaga or Barcelona in a semi-final clash that will be of huge interest and intrigue if one club in particular goes through, but still worth watching if it ends up being Barça instead.

On Thursday at Málaga, Barcelona's bench will be bossed by Jordi Roura, what with Tito Vilanova away in New York receiving treatment for his illness. Roura claims that the game is a whopper, a ‘match ball’ even, “the first of the season and we need to win it.” Or possibly draw 2-2 and go through on penalties, corrects a pedantic LLL, the Camp Nou first leg having also been 2-2.

Earlier on Thursday, Atlético Madrid travel to Betis protecting a 2-0 lead, which should be enough to compensate for the fact that Falcao is out with a leg twang and Adrían may be leading the line instead.

Earlier than that, so early that it's on Wednesday, Sevilla host Zaragoza after a goalless first leg. In his week or so at the club, Unai Emery has already been a whirlwind of activity, and he's even had time to record a rousing advert to get the fans back on side after some sorry nights this season in the Sánchez Pizjuán.

The ad involves the terrifying Gary ‘Pitbull’ Medel singing his heart out in the stands, before Emery orders him back to training, telling him not to worry as the supporters won’t let the players down in the cup clash.

You won’t see that at the Emirates or Old Trafford any time soon.

Madrid media sense Bernabéu boys reunited and ready for title push

2013-01-22T10:29:00Z

"I just want to spend four months alone, watching DVDs of Barça losing..."

With José Mourinho currently coming over a bit Howard Hughes and keeping himself to himself, instead sending lowly footballers or assistant manager Aitor Karanka to talk to the accursed media, Sunday's whopping victory in Mestalla against Valencia is a handy straw for the Madrid media to grasp.

Apparently, everything is fine and dandy again in Mordor, with all those little issues that have so dominated the headlines and talk shows over the past six months - including bust-ups, quarrels between manager and players and wholly unmotivated performances - suddenly now a thing of the past. Yes, the title chase is back on after one, single match. Easy, really.

A chirpy Marca leads the chorus line on Tuesday, with "all for one!" plastered across its front cover, thanks to the revelation that "the Madrid dressing room has forgotten the internal divisions and has come together to fight for every title." Woot!

AS feel the same way and have forgotten their nanny-state nagging and fretting over Mourinho's dedication to the job. The most recent grumble came when Sunday's edition reported in detail how the Portuguese only attended the first 45 minutes of Saturday's training session, before pootling off home then attending his son's football game, missing the pre-match press conference in the process. The 5-0 tonking the following day therefore suggests that the less time that Mourinho spends with his footballers, the better they play. Which makes a lot of sense in hindsight.

Tuesday's edition posts a remarkable poll from its online readers, which shows that just 62% think that Barça will win the league, after the Primera leaders lost 3-2 to Real Sociedad on Saturday evening. A good 22% gave the title to Real Madrid 15 points behind, with 16% suggesting Atlético Madrid. "Logic in football is incapable of stopping faith," noted the news report on the survey.

Over in the Catalan capital a few gaps have appeared in the city's shroud of smugness, after the not unreasonable suggestion from Víctor Valdés agents that the cantankerous keeper would like a change in scene in a year-and-a-half's time. That and a couple of leads chucked away against Málaga and Real Sociedad along with five goals conceded.

Mundo Deportivo are in bold mood, though, and have a bit of fun at the expense of the euphoria in Madrid. "Reading, seeing and listening to the press close to (Real Madrid), it seems that the victory against Valencia is almost like winning the Champions League," notes Manuel Bruña, who wonders what the party would be like at Cibeles if the lead between the two ever dropped from 15 to 12.

Aside from that, the paper continues to busy itself with naming possible replacements for Valdés, a bit of an obsession in the city at the moment. The Barça tendency to be all a bit Scouse and shout 'calm down!' when a sense of peace is far from their minds is reflected in Tuesday's Sport. "The club and team are strong and are ready to face any adversity," advised Joan Vehils in an organ which is still trying to work out why Valdés wants to go in the first place on the front cover. Probably to escape a country and local media which is probably bugging the big toes over the goalkeeper at the moment.

La Review: Efficient Atlético, bottling Barça and a rampant Real Madrid

2013-01-21T16:02:00Z

FourFourTwo's man in Madrid Tim Stannard gives the lowdown on the weekend's Primera Liga action - it's Good Day, Bad Day...

Fri 18 Jan Espanyol 3-2 Mallorca Sat 19 Jan Granada 2-0 Rayo Vallecano; Real Sociedad 3-2 Barcelona; Getafe 1-1 Sevilla; Málaga 1-1 Celta de Vigo Sun 20 Jan Osasuna 2-1 Deportivo La Coruña; Real Valladolid 2-0 Real Zaragoza; Atlético Madrid 2-0 Levante; Valencia 0-5 Real Madrid Mon 21 Jan Real Betis v Athletic Bilbao

GOOD DAY

Atlético Madrid
Another normal day at the office for the Primera-persistent Atlético Madrid, who close the gap behind Barcelona to a mere eight points. A solid, no-nonsense 2-0 win over Levante and a tenth match in all competitions without the Rojiblancos conceding a goal at the Vicente Calderón. Far too efficient for a sniffy LLL’s liking.

Real Madrid
Unsurprisingly, the Madrid press are very excited indeed on Monday, first off by Barcelona's defeat and the 5-0 thrashing of Valencia that has AS gasping that “the Madrid of 100 points is back.” “A meteorite with 11 balls of fire,” was how an overstimulated and previously underfed Tomás Roncero described the performance of his side, who led 5-0 by the break, the first time Madrid had achieved that in la Liga since 1948.

LLL would call for caution. The win was helped along by some lamentable defending from the visitors – and all Madrid's forwards playing well, which is all too rare this season. It’s faaaaaar to early to tell if this will see a renewed charge for the title, or even an attempt to close the 15-point gap on Barcelona.

Real Sociedad
That’s the third year in a row that la Real have stopped Barcelona in la Anoeta, a ground that is turning into a bit of an unhappy spot for Barça. Although Gérard Pique was sent off early in the second half, Real Sociedad had done well merely to hang on in there after going 2-0 down within 25 minutes.

But two goals from Chory Castro – one beautifully placed, one fortuitously deflected – and an injury-time winner from Imanol Agirretxe added another impressive result to the season’s tally, which includes wins at Valencia and Málaga. “They deserve the Golden Drum,” enthused manager Philippe Montanier, referencing a local prize handed out in the past three years to a road race, Xabi Alonso and a plodding pop group.

Valladolid
A 2-0 victory over Zaragoza sees Miroslav Djukic and his players ambling away quietly in mid-table. “The club president came to me before the game to ask if I had picked the footballers he told me to. I told him that he makes things easy for me as I don’t have any others,” joked the side’s Serbian coach, who has now amassed 28 points for his side.

Unai Emery
Freezing rain and wind were in the air at the Coliseum, but not once did Unai Emery come off the touchline for a break from handing out endless instructions to his new Sevilla charges, who LLL doubts were listening for one single second. It’s wonderful to have the crouching master back.

Espanyol
The problem with Friday night matches in Spain is that by the time Monday comes around they feel like the games were played way back in the mists of time – "Didn’t people dress funny back then, footballers with mutton-chop sideboards" far. This week, Espanyol were jammed into that slot but completed a very handy week of football with another home victory against relegation rivals – this time Mallorca, to add to the previous win over Celta Vigo. The six points have lifted Espanyol into a comfortable 14th.

Carlos Aranda
Granada’s first home win of the season arrived at the end of September, so fans had to wait a heck of long time – seven league matches in fact – before another victory came along, with the Andalusians defeating Rayo Vallecano 2-0. Granada’s second came from an assist from the newly-arrived Carlos Aranda, now playing for his eighth Primera club.

Osasuna
A proper six-pointer in Pamplona saw Osasuna beating relegation rivals Deportivo. However, the opener from *** Sola in the 2-1 victory came from a pass with a player in an offside position. So of course, the lucky manager went for the usual strategy in such situations – claim that the referee was only righting wrongs of the past. “In 20 matches, it’s the first time they’ve given us something,” claimed José Luis Mendilibar.

BAD DAY

Barcelona
And so the day finally dawns, the moment when Barcelona find themselves in the Bad Day section of the blog. The general vibe in the Catalan capital is summed up by Sport whose headline read “It doesn’t matter (the league is won)”, with Josep María Casanovas soothing that “there’s nothing to worry about. It had to happen some day.”

There are several reasons to believe this – going unbeaten for so long is more unusual than losing a single game of football and Barça's form has been known to take a little dip in January or February before picking up again once the Champions League gets going.

Lluís Mascaró has another reason behind Saturday’s reverse and the midweek cup draw against Málaga. “I don’t want to say that Guardiola and Valdés are to blame for the defeat,” writes the Sport columnist, blaming Guardiola and Valdés for the defeat, “but everyone knows that for everything to go well with Barça there has to be absolute tranquility.” Thursday’s Copa del Rey second leg against Málaga is already looking a tasty one with the score nicely balanced at 2-2.

Málaga
An iffy start to 2013 for Málaga, who have now picked up just the single point from nine. That point came in Saturday’s draw against Celta Vigo, who are no great shakes on the road. The drop in performance levels may well be due to the Copa del Rey clashes against Barcelona – although Manuel Pellegrini is less than happy with the pitch at la Rosaleda, which the Chilean compared to “an ice rink.”

Valencia
Oh dear. That’s 17 goals conceded now in the last four matches against Real Madrid in Mestalla, so it’s by no means the first time time that fans have left the stadium early in disgust, although storming off at half-time with the home side 5-0 down probably is a rarity. Even for Valencia supporters.

The loss, which forms part two of the Valencia v RM treble, was down to the home team's central midfield mess and an even worse situation down the flanks, which were a Germany-style motorway for Real Madrid. “They were infinitely superior,” admitted Ernesto Valverde after the match.

Levante
The 2-0 defeat at Atlético Madrid continues a new year lull for Levante, who have lost two from three this month.

Luis García
The Getafe boss didn’t seem to be enjoying the Sevilla game at all, irrespective of the cold, wind and very swirly drizzle that made already sparse stands empty even further. The suspended Garçia was sat just two seats in front of an excited LLL and there was an awful lot of frustration and arm-waving.

His injury-hit side struggled to create chances and get on top of the visitors, who found home keeper Carlos Moyá in fine form and pulling off some Barcelona-tempting saves. LLL noticed with some surprise that Getafe have now gone six league games without a victory.

Joaquín Caparrós
As with Míchel and Sevilla last week, this may be a moment when the coach in question doesn’t make it until the end of Monday in his job. Defeats against Valladolid and Espanyol have weakened Caparrós even further. “I am strong but feeling down now because I like to win but more so for the footballers. Now we have to prepare for the next match,” hoped Jokin after the 3-2 defeat in Cornella.

Questions asked of Barça stars as Pep prepares for Munich mission

2013-01-18T10:33:00Z

FourFourTwo.com's pain in Spain, Tim Stannard, previews the weekend's La Liga action...

Friday

Espanyol (16th) v Mallorca (18th) - 21.00 (all times local Spanish)
It’s reinforcement time at Espanyol, with the club attempting to stuff the playing ranks with veteran Atlético Madrid footballers. First to arrive last summer was Simao. The winger has now been followed by a player whose Wikipedia entry suggests is also known as ‘The Bulgarian Express’, namely Martin Petrov who joins from Bolton to be managed again by Javier Aguirre, after a spell together at the Vicente Calderón. Maniche and Mista must be checking their mobile phones every few seconds, now.
“Coming from playing in the English second division back to the Spanish league is marvelous for me,” beamed the former Manchester City man. “I was in England, so as you can imagine my family is very happy,” joked Petrov, who La Liga Loca feels may have been making fun of the Motherland. The blog is not sure if it is going to let this slight stand...
LLL Prediction - Home win

Saturday

Granada (17th) v Rayo Vallecano (6th) - 16.00
Another victory for Rayo on Saturday would make it a top hat-throwing five Primera wins in a row for the Madrid side, equalling the club's record run in Spain’s big league. But the chances of that have decreased somewhat with the news that Leo Baptistao is out of action for up to a month with a muscle tear. Then again, the opponents are Granada, who have just won the single game at home from nine, so everything might be alright on the...er...afternoon.
All the more reason then, for pugnacious Rayo fullback, José Manuel Casado, to sound excitable and gung-ho about Saturday’s clash. “We have to go out to die for a badge and for a shirt to keep showing people that we’re here and to keep shutting gobs, as nobody gave a damn about us at the beginning of the season,” rallied the defender, as LLL hides its own ‘relegation’ prediction made in August.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Real Sociedad (9th) v Barcelona (1st) - 18.00
Barely 24 hours separated the announcement of Pep Guardiola’s move to Bayern Munich and the first formal question to a Barcelona player on whether he would also be Germany-bound. That footballer was Thiago, who was rather surprised with the poser put to him. “Me? I’m here at Barça, playing for the best club in the world and I’m not planning on moving.”
Quite a few supporters would like to see Alexis taking a hike though, with ire increasing on a bit of a damp squib of a season for the forward, who missed a couple of sitters in Wednesday in a 2-2 cup draw against Málaga. “More evidence that he’s under too much pressure, having an alarming crisis of confidence,” noted Sport’s Josep Maria Casanovas.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Getafe (11th) v Sevilla (12th) - 20.00
This isn’t just a mid-table clash between two sides who will neither go down, or qualify for Europe; instead, it’s the return to la Liga of Unai Emery after the sacking of Míchel on Monday. And LLL plans to be there if Getafe will let the blog into the ground, and ignore the previous jokes about the Madrid club being a bit dull.
LLL loves them really. Big love. Sevilla had a mini-debut with their new manager on Wednesday in the cup, with a goalless draw at Zaragoza starting things off. Meanwhile, club president José María del Nido admitted the hand-waving wizard may not be able to halt the club’s slide in the end. “If I had a magic wand to fix Sevilla’s problems, Emery would not be here,” admitted del Nido.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Málaga (5th) v Celta Vigo (15th) - 22.00
Quite rightly, Celta Vigo are playing hard-to-get in relation to Valencia’s amorous advances towards striker Iago Aspas, who has reportedly agreed personal terms to go to Mestalla, and spend many a season being called offside incorrectly by dastardly referees who have it for the side, apparently.
“I feel very strongly that our president will not let Iago go unless someone pays his buy-out clause. If that happens we have no solution,” admitted coach, Paco Herrera, who said that “no-one, not Superman, can stop a club coming and paying the clause,” thus clearly underestimating the powers that the Krypton-born super-hero has. He could launch Mestalla into the sun, perhaps. Or freeze Valencia’s accounting team. Or...
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Osasuna (20th) v Deportivo (19th) - 12.00
It’s the destitute duo in action on Sunday morning, a fixture probably put in place to save Osasuna’s floodlight electricity bill. Deportivo are the worse off of the Segunda-bound pair, having officially gone into administration this week. The lawyer now in charge of the club, Julio Fernández, reminded Depor fans that, despite being a supporter of the side, he “cannot forget that we are here to safeguard the interests of the creditors. I’m a Depor fan, but the law must be followed.”
Meanwhile, Osasuna have let winger Roland Lamah go on loan to Swansea for a year-and-a-half, a bit of a surprise given he's quite a handy player. Then again, if all the footballer did was lump balls into the box for strikers who never got on the end of them, there probably wasn’t much use having the Belgian around.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Valladolid (10th) v Zaragoza (13th)
A more than decent campaign so far for their German player, Patrick Ebert, has seen speculation of a swift departure for the midfielder; especially after a cracking brace last weekend against Mallorca. “I have my head here at Valladolid and I don’t know what my agent will do,” said Ebert, not really helping the stories going away.
Meanwhile, Zaragoza have had a bit of trouble over scary forward, Carlos Aranda - not a figure to be messed with - with the striker refusing to play in the cup game against Sevilla due to not feeling so good over the death of his grandmother and wanting to go and play for Granada instead. “The idea is to not select him anymore and find a replacement now,” admitted Manolo Jiménez, one of the few people in the universe not to be scared of the hot-heated striker.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Levante (8th) - 19.00
Boo to Atlético Madrid, a 2-0 win on Thursday probably ruins the chance of a Sevilla/Betis semi-final in the Copa del Rey. Curse the side’s professionalism and dedication. Speaking of which, Levante have been busy beavers in the transfer market. First off, the club have been chatting with goalkeeper Gustavo Munúa to try and prevent him from leaving Spain for Nacional, in his homeland of Uruguay. An old (in both senses of the words) footballer has returned, though, with Valdo coming back after a short and what appears to be unsuccessful spell across the Atlantic. “I want to make up for lost time. I don’t regret going to Mexico but sometimes you can be wrong,” admitted the 31-year-old winger.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia (7th) v Real Madrid (3rd) - 21.00
Well, it seems as if pre-crime as been introduced into la Liga, with Thursday’s AS looking at the referees in charge of the next two Valencia vs Real Madrid clashes on Sunday and Wednesday and going through their history to find faults. All this because of complaints from the Valencia camp that the man in the middle had it in for them in the Bernabeu during the side’s 2-0 defeat in the cup on Wednesday, a result that had just as much to do with Jonas being a bit of a plonker up front. “Valencia are complaining, but they are too late. Mourinho got their first,” noted Marca drily.
The other scandal being pushed about is an apparent bust-up between Cristiano Ronaldo and José Mourinho after the game that appears to be growing in size and seriousness every time that it is repeated.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Monday

Betis (4th) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) - 21.30
Apparently, Marcelo Bielsa, has been trying to make his normally tortuous training sessions a little more fun in a bid to stop a slump which has seen them lose three league matches in a row. However, this burst of happiness seems to have been too late for Carlos Gurpegui, who admitted that “we are the most frustrated. Last season was almost covered in glory and now we have to scrap in the dirt.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

More referee rants and Zaragoza’s trashed tactics

2013-01-16T14:28:00Z

First things first, it’s time to get the grown-up football talk out of the way, so bear with us for a moment. In the home leg of the Copa del Rey quarter-final against Valencia, Real Madrid's entertaining 2-0 win made them strong favourites to go through to a semi-final meeting against either Málaga or (heaven forbid) Barcelona. Karim Benzema and an own goal from Andrés Guardado did the job for Madrid, although Jonas was a bit of a dozy doozy throughout the game and should have notched an away goal for his side.

Boom! Benzema bags at the Bernabeu

This being Spain though, the real chat after the match was whether the anti-anti-anti-Villarato [CIA-backed pro-Barça refereeing conspiracy] was in effect, and the moaning from Angel di María the previous day and the Madrid papers about offside decisions not going Madrid’s way had had an impact in the match.

Valencia certainly seem to think so, with a few close calls going against the visitors. Roberto Soldado was on the wrong end of a chunk of those and was not best pleased after the match.

“Madrid have been putting a lot of pressure on the referee all week,” moaned the striker, who is still smarting over having a goal ruled out at the Bernabeu in the league clash earlier this season. “There are games when referees work in your favour and others when everything is against you, but in this case it was incredible,” said Soldado, probably earning himself a hefty fine.

Barcelona would never be a bunch of moaning Minnies – aside from bleating endlessly about not getting enough penalties last season – so it was with a straight face that Tito Vilanova spoke about Angel di María’s claims of refereeing bias ahead of Barça’s cup clash with Málaga on Wednesday.

“I saw the images of what di María said; I don’t think he was being serious. He was almost smiling,” chuckled the Barça boss, who appeared to be in mischievous mood, especially with the zinger over what the Catalan coach felt about the 18-point lead over Real Madrid: “If the question was about the reverse situation then I wouldn’t be here now answering it.”

Titter ye lot: Tito brings the LOLs

There's so little to say about the cup double-header against Málaga, whom Barça beat 3-1 at la Rosaleda on Saturday, that Wednesday’s Mundo Deportivo front cover has Leo Messi posing with his awards while a story concerning Víctor Valdés dominates Sport.

There’s more fun to be had though with the quarter-final kicking off before the Camp Nou clash: Unai Emery’s first match in charge of Sevilla, at Zaragoza. The arm-flapping blog favourite promises that his Sevilla are going to be “an aggressive team with and without the ball.” That’s pretty much what his counterpart on the Zaragoza bench, Manolo Jiménez, is all about too so there should be fisticuffs aplenty.

Jiménez – who was himself Sevilla boss, five managers ago – isn't that happy over the Andalusians' firing of Míchel NoLongerTheManager, complaining that “I’ve had to ditch all my plans. I know Sevilla and their players very well, but I’ve no idea what Unai is going to do.”

Although the tie is the least glamorous of the four matches taking place this week, with Atlético Madrid hosting Betis on Thursday at the ludicrous time of 10pm, Unai Emery’s return to la Liga could be the most intriguing.

COPA DEL REY Tue 15 Jan Real Madrid 2-0 Valencia Wed 16 Jan Real Zaragoza v Sevilla, Barcelona v Málaga Thu 17 Jan Atlético Madrid v Real Betis

King Unai returns to Spanish shores as Míchel sacked by Sevilla

2013-01-15T13:08:00Z

On Monday, when La Liga Loca pondered on these very pages how much longer Míchel could hang on as Sevilla boss, few could have known that the answer would prove to be “about 20 minutes”.

Saturday's defeat against Valencia continued a quite miserable run of just two league wins in 14, leaving the Andalusians five points from the relegation zone and 12 from the Champions League spots, with the latter being where Sevilla need to finish if they intend to make ends meet over the campaigns to come.

When the former Getafe boss was appointed Sevilla manager at the beginning of February last year, the mission scribbled on a note and handed to Míchel was to get the side back into Europe. That target was missed by some margin, with Sevilla finishing behind what you would generally describe as 'lesser sides', such as Mallorca, Levante, Osasuna and Real Madrid.

Nevertheless, Sevilla president José María del Nido seemed quite besotted with his coach, and on December 10 gushed that “we question the results but absolutely not the coach. He has the confidence of the board and the sporting leadership.” But Sevilla losing three of the four league games that followed this oozing of public support seems to have changed the tone at the Sánchez Pizjuán somewhat.

While the Sevilla squad is decent enough, there are a few rotten eggs among the playing staff, with one or two not giving a flying fish in most matches. After all, this is a side that beat Betis 5-1 and Real Madrid 1-0 this season. “A hidden face that occasionally appears,” was how Míchel described it, with his side deciding to play well enough to produce a victory just 13 times in his 36 league matches at the helm. To be fair to the dashing, square-jawed trainer, the former Real Madrid man has merely joined a long line of coaches who have failed to stop a steady slump at Sevilla; good managers such as Marcelino García and Gregorio Manzano among them.

But what's bad news for Míchel is very good news for LLL, with this blog tickled-purple at the prospect of the return of the crouching, pointing, white-board loving loon that is Unai Emery, who is now contracted to take the reins until the end of next season. The first task of the former Valencia boss is to lead the side in Wednesday’s first leg quarter-final Copa clash against Zaragoza, up in Aragonese lands.

That clash is the second of four ties taking place this week. The first is on Tuesday night at the Santiago Bernabéu and it’s set to be a Bullseye Speedboat of a double header between a Valencia team who have won seven from eight under Ernesto Valverde, and a Real Madrid outfit which now resemble the final ten band-falling-apart minutes of The Commitments.

The latest squabble in the Spanish capital centres around Angel di María, or at least that’s what Marca claim, with Tuesday’s edition suggesting that Mourinho tore the Argentinean a new one after the weekend draw with Osasuna for easing his foot off the gas ever since a new deal was signed. Di María was certainly given a punishment of sorts, having been forced to sit in the hot seat for the Valencia pre-match press conference, from where the winger tried to get back in the good books with a fine moan about referees. “They are sending us off for anything,” complained Di María in light of three red cards in three matches for Madrid, “these are mistakes that are not made in error.” However, di María’s form has been so off of late that not even this bit of his master’s bidding may be enough to spare him more tongue lashings.

Atlético bounce back again to put themselves in pole position (for second...)

2013-01-14T11:17:00Z

FourFourTwo's man in Madrid, Tim Stannard, gives the lowdown on the weekend's Primera Liga action - it's Good Day, Bad Day...

Good Day

Barcelona
Tito Vilanova was back on the bench after a quick trip to the States on medical leave saw him miss the midweek cup clash with Córdoba, but it was the same old low-key style from the Barça boss, as his team continued their near-perfect start to his first campaign in the top job with a 3-1 victory at Malaga. Once again, he shunned the limelight and reflected all the praise onto the players, but the Barça boss deserves some backslapping for managing to get the best out of Cesc Fabregas, continuing to keep Leo Messi at the top of his game, and turning around the form of players such as Pedro and Thiago. But keeping David Villa happy may prove his toughest challenge yet.

Leo Messi
Just the single goal and assist from the Argentinean, so not a sterling match by the now four-times Ballon d’Or winner's standards, but his goal tally the first half of the campaign of 27 (using Marca’s stats) would have been enough to win, or at least tie 10 of the last 15 Pichichi top goalscorer awards. It certainly makes Diego Tristan’s 21 from 2001/02 look rather puny.

Atlético Madrid
Once again, Atlético Madrid immediately bounced back from a set-back in la Liga, proving themselves to be a side made from girders under the guidance of Diego Soldado, instead of the marzipan of the Gregorio Manzano era. On the five occasions Atlético have dropped points in their 19 games, the side have responded immediately with a win in the next. Last week, an Atlético Madrid without Arda Turan and Falcao drew at Mallorca, but the pair returned against Zaragoza on Sunday for a perfectly professional performance from Atlético and a 2-0 victory. With a seven point lead over Real Madrid now in place, second place is for the Rojiblancos to lose.

Jorge Mendes
Cristiano Ronaldo’s agent must have been taking enormous delight in seeing Real Madrid labouring like nobody’s business against Osasuna, in a game where the visitors managed just two shots on target and drew 0-0 against the side currently propping up the table. “Watching Real Madrid without the best player in the world is like drinking a zero alcohol beer,” AS scribe Tomás Roncero said of the performance from a misshapen team who seemed to be hacking up an awful lot of aimless balls for José Callejón to run on to. To the midfielder's credit, he did so manfully, and was perhaps the best and only performer for Madrid in Pamplona.

Rubén Castro
Betis' truly brilliant finisher has now popped up with 11 goals this season, the same number from open play as Falcao has scored for Atlético Madrid. With half of the season gone and Málaga potentially out of the picture due to a European ban, Betis are now genuine contenders for the Champions League places. Indeed, Sunday's 2-0 win against Levante puts the Sevilla side just three points from the faltering Real Madrid.

Rayo Vallecano
The 2-1 victory at Athletic Bilbao was another truly remarkable win for Rayo, although they did get a little bit of luck. The referee awarded them a penalty for a challenge on Chori Domínguez, which replays showed actually took place outside the box - but only just, so a charitable LLL will give the official the benefit of the doubt. Rayo’s fourth league win in a row has given them 31 points, making this their best first half of a season in la Primera since 1990/00 and the Juande Ramos era. Wonderful stuff.

Roberto Soldado
With all the brotherly love that exists in la Primera among the club presidents, LLL is sure there wasn’t a Tim Henman-style fist pump in sight in the Mestalla offices when the news of Málaga’s European ban for next season filtered through before Christmas. It has certainly given Valencia a bit of a boost, having also now won seven from the last eight in all competitions to move to just four points from fourth. The most recent win - and a timely one, ahead of three matches in a row against Real Madrid - came in the form over a 2-0 triumph against an insipid Sevilla, with a brace for Roberto Soldado.

Patrick Ebert
Valladolid’s right-sided midfielder is having quite the debut campaign for the club since joining from Hertha Berlin. The former Germany under-21 international, who is very much part of the Mesut Özil generation, has now scored five in la Liga, the total he netted in the previous five seasons of club football combined. The latest two came in the 3-1 win over Mallorca, which stopped a bit of a wobble for Valladolid and gave them a very comforting 25 points from the first half of the season.

Javier Aguirre
It may have only been a squeaky 1-0 win against Celta Vigo on Saturday, but it continues a run of just one defeat in six for Espanyol, and that loss was against Barcelona, so it was more than a little forgivable. Javier Aguirre is now picking up points at more than double the rate of the Mexican’s predecessor, Mauricio Pochettino.

Sundays Patience
A second match and another game without defeat for new Deportivo boss, Domingos Paciencia.

Bad Day

José Mourinho
“It’s not worth talking about what happened in the first six matches,” was the mysterious message from José Mourinho when trying to explain what’s been going wrong at Real Madrid this season, with the team picking up 12 fewer points than they had at this stage of last season. Unless the Portuguese is discussing the drop in effort levels from much of his side, LLL feels it’s not worth listening to the Madrid manager on this particular issue.

Kaká
Oh dear. When the Brazilian did finally get a kick-about, Kaká managed to get sent off for what were two soft yellows, 18 minutes after coming on as a second-half substitute.

Málaga
The southern side certainly put up a bit of a fight of it in the 3-1 home defeat to Barcelona, but the dominance and superiority of the opponents does not bode well for Málaga in the upcoming Copa del Rey double-header, which kicks off at the Camp Nou on Wednesday.

Ignacio Camacho
An assist that Xavi himself would have been proud of from the Málaga midfielder put Leo Messi through to set Barça off on the side's 3-1 win.

Míchel
LLL has no idea how long Míchel the Manager can keep on hanging on at Sevilla, seeing the club has gone nowhere very slowly in the year or so that the former Real Madrid footballer has been in charge. The side have won just two of the their last 11 league games, and have had one of their worst first halves of a seasons in recent memory, with just 22 points collected thus far. “We are being made to bleed but we haven’t covered where we are being wounded,” warned the manager rather graphically.

Athletic Bilbao
Although Athletic boss Marcelo Bielsa often lives up to his reputation of being a bit of an odd ball, the Argentinean is a very logical Vulcan-like straight-shooter when it comes to analysing games. There’s no Mourinho-style smoke-and-mirrors nonsense to explain away defeats. “We had 12 chances, they had three,” was Bielsa’s comment on the 2-1 home loss to Rayo in a game that Athletic really should have won, or at least got a point from based on the chances spurned. Instead it’s now three league defeats in a row for the Basque side.

Celta Vigo
Saturday's 1-0 defeat at Espanyol leaves Celta Vigo with just the single away win from 10 in la Liga. LLL guesses that record will probably need to improve if Celta are going to stay up this season.

Osasuna
Another game without a goal for Osasuna, who remain bottom of la Primera. Even worse, the 0-0 against Real Madrid wasn’t even a match where they were forced to work that hard. An opportunity missed? Perhaps...

La Preview: Atlético’s summer signing, Espanyol’s apology & Mestalla manoeuvres

2013-01-11T11:44:00Z

FRIDAY

Athletic Bilbao (14th) v Rayo Vallecano (7th) – 21.30 (all kick-offs Spain local time)
If La Liga Loca had any kind of heart, it would have shed a tear on Monday night after freezing its toes witnessing the football-affirming experience of Rayo Vallecano winning three on the bounce by thrashing the suburban hides off a dismal Getafe.

The side pegged by the blog as relegation near-certainties after a summer in which they lost Diego Costa, Raúl Tamudo and Michu are now just three points from the Champions League places; with 20 games to play, five wins will see them safe – and they're halfway to the points total that got Levante into Europe.

It’s all very different up in Bilbao, with Athletic trundling through a rotten campaign, light years from the European places. Then again, the side are well away from the relegation spots which is some small relief. “We have the team to be doing really well, but I feel ashamed saying this,” admitted a glum Aritz Aduriz, who says that Saturday’s clash with Rayo is “a definitive one”.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SATURDAY

Valladolid (11th) v Mallorca (16th) – 16.00
Plucky Mallorca weren’t able to overturn the 5-0 first-leg deficit in their last-16 Copa del Rey clash at Sevilla, but by ginger the side gave it a go. They beat their hosts 2-1 in front of 15,000 souls, which was actually pretty good going given the pointlessness of the match.

Naturally, the ever-bubbly (except when he’s hopping mad) Joaquín Caparrós was delighted with the result – Mallorca's third undefeated game on the bounce. “We have to face each match like it’s a final,” announced the cliché-spouting Mallorca boss, “as if it’s the most important of the championship, and each action as if it was the last of the match.” LLL is looking forward to seeing keeper Dudu Aoaute going up for Mallorca's corners from the very first minute.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Espanyol (18th) v Celta Vigo (15th) – 18.00
Grr. Fighting talk and a bit of an apology at Espanyol this week, as is to be expected from a team lead by Javier Aguirre. The grovel came first from Joan Capdevila, who admitted that being 4-0 down to neighbours Barcelona within half an hour last weekend probably wasn’t a good thing.

“You can lose, but trying to give a bit more,” said the left-back. “We will have to sweat blood to win the next six points which won’t be easy, as they are against direct rivals and every match there’s less time.” In actual fact, the next two games probably couldn’t be any easier for Espanyol considering they're both at home against Celta and Mallorca, who've managed one away league win each all season.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Osasuna (20th) v Real Madrid (3rd) – 20.00
A rousing home win for Real Madrid in the cup against Celta Vigo makes everything seem a little bit shinier for José Mourinho & Co. The same can’t be said for their hosts, bottom of la Liga and knocked out by Valencia in their own Copa del Rey tie. Still, there’s a sliver of hope with Madrid weakened by injuries to Pepe and potentially Xabi Alonso, along with the suspensions to Cristiano Ronaldo and the whopping five-match ban handed out to Sergio Ramos.

The debonair defender was sent off against Celta, but four matches of the suspension are for reportedly giving the referee some family-unfriendly opinions on his performance – and continuing to do so after the match. Although it sounds like a hefty ban, it’s not particularly out of context in this season's la Liga, where managers have been sent off for even looking at refs a bit funny.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Valencia (8th) v Sevilla (12th) – 22.00
What Valencia really need now, with the Mestalla supporters all agitated and a change of manager still fresh in their minds, is a bit of institutional uproar. That took place on Wednesday with the formal announcement of a challenger to the presidential crown of the under-pressure Manuel Llorente in the form of Fernando Gómez, who played 553 games for los Che (and then a few for Wolves) and was a vice-president in a former regime.

Under the slogan “Always Valencia. Dream again,” Gómez suggested that Llorente “stand down, as the vast majority of the fans are calling for.” The presidential wannabe did not go into details over how he would get the club out of its financial mess and deal with a half-built stadium, but promised that he wouldn't draw a salary until “economic viability has been secured.” LLL hopes Gómez has plenty of savings.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SUNDAY

Betis (5th) v Levante (6th) – 12.00
As predicted on these pages, Levante got knocked out of the Copa del Rey by Zaragoza but probably won’t be that fussed, due to their small squad facing rather hefty league and European commitments.
Sunday's opponents Betis sneaked through against Las Palmas with a 2-1 aggregate win, setting up a doable quarter-final double clash with Atlético Madrid.

First, though, coach Pepe Mel is fretting over the visit of Levante – a point and a place behind the Sevillan side, just below the Champions League places. “It’s the worst rival that can come to us, because they love to play without the ball, giving you space and waiting for you to make a mistake.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Real Sociedad (9th) v Deportivo (19th) – 17.00
After leaving Atlético Madrid without anyone really noticing for a spin at Sao Paolo, Paolo Assunçao is back in la Liga. And what more tempting place to end up than Deportivo, a side second from bottom of the table, going into administration and fortunate to pay for club president Augusto Lendoiro’s lunch fund, never mind salaries for the footballers.

Assunçao admitted that he was surprised by Deportivo’s position in the league table, considering the club has “great players and a great manager,” but was keen to praise Domingos Paciencia for being “a great coach, a great person” and having had “a great campaign” when the Portuguese was in charge at Sporting Braga.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Zaragoza (13th) – 19.00
AS are taking a sneaky guess that Atlético Madrid have already made a signing for next season in the form of Rayo striker Leo Baptistao, having spotted the Vallecas president at the Vicente Calderon on Thursday.

However, there has been a fair amount of footballer-swapping between the two clubs over the past year so it may just be another bit of loan business. LLL wonders if the Rayo Vallecano office wi-fi had crashed, and Raúl Martin Presa was simply borrowing a bit of bandwidth.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Málaga (4th) v Barcelona (1st) – 21.00
Is Víctor Valdés going to be running halfway up the pitch to row with referees and opposition players somewhere other than Spain in the seasons to come? The Barça goalkeeper certainly hinted at the possibility last week when admitting during a press conference that “I don’t rule out looking for different football and knowing other cultures.”

Valdés has a contract until 2014 and Rosell says he has some sympathy with the plight of the Barça blocker. “It’s said that the three most difficult things in the world are to be the Pope, the President of the USA and Barcelona goalkeeper.” It's news to this blog’s sheltered ears.
LLL Prediction – Away win

MONDAY

Getafe (10th) v Granada (17th) – 20.00
La Liga is certainly saving the best for last on Monday night, the glamour slot of the weekly calendar, with this tasty feast between Getafe and Granada. Indeed, the clash was set up with a thriller on Thursday night in the Coliseum, which saw Getafe bravely chasing down a 3-0 deficit to Atlético Madrid in the Copa del Rey in an enthralling goalless draw.

Although it must have been very hard to hear, there were reportedly chants from the home crowd calling for the departure of Luis García – especially after Monday’s awful performance against Rayo. “They are paying and can do what they want. The team are tenth and that’s not a bad place,” noted the Getafe boss.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Mourinho's chance to win back the Bernabeu

2013-01-09T10:57:00Z

Lately, LLL has been comparing José Mourinho to a twirly moustache-sporting pantomime villain. However, judging by the Bernabeu boos on Sunday night, there's nobody to shout "Behind you!" – because everyone is against him.

A poll of 705 Real Madrid club members published in Wednesday’s Marca shows that just 54% think the Portuguese should stay in the job next season – down from 94% last season. Not only that, but 61% feel that the coach’s behaviour damages the image of the club.

Mourinho has another chance to boost his popularity in Wednesday night's Copa del Rey tie; visitors Celta Vigo are 2-1 up from the first leg. On the positive side for the capital city club, Celta have only won one of their last 10 away games in all competitions; then again, as Marca's stats desk admirably reveals, Madrid haven't won recovered from a first-leg deficit in the Spanish Cup or Champions League in 12 attempts.

Celta boss Paco Herrera gives his team just 10% chance of going through to the quarter-finals, while nobody knows what Mourinho or even Aitor Karanka think as neither spoke to the press before the match, with the pair sensibly dodging endless questions from AS on why the coach was watching his son training for his football team during the Ballon d’Or ceremony when he said he would be preparing for Wednesday’s clash instead. “Mourinho is hiding,” claims the paper’s front cover ahead of the last 16 game.

Xabi Alonso spoke instead and fooled no-one when revealing that the relationship between Iker Casillas and his manager is “respectful, cordial and trying to work for the team,” despite the goalkeeper being dropped from the starting line-up for two league games and quite possibly the clash with Celta Vigo, with no one entirely sure who will be standing between the sticks for the game.

1 Dec: Mourinho tests the fans' reaction

Should Madrid go through, they will face Valencia in the next round after the Mestalla side beat Osasuna 2-1 in the second leg on Tuesday. This means that the two sides will be playing each other three times in a row in the league and cup.

It’s set to be the same situation with Málaga and Barcelona – starting this weekend. The southern side had a wobble on Tuesday against Eibar, spending 74 minutes losing to the lower-league outfit before knocking in four goals. Barcelona host Córdoba on Thursday, holding a 2-0 lead to set up a quarter-final match with Manuel Pellegrini’s men.

There are two other clashes taking place on Wednesday. Levante travel to Zaragoza 1-0 down but probably unfussed about whether or not the deficit is made up, considering their intense interests in the league (they're sixth) and Europa League (they face Olympiacos in next month's round of 32).

However, the lowest crowd in recorded history may well be at the Sánchez Pizjuán for Sevilla vs Mallorca, what with the home team holding a 5-0 advantage and the drop-dodging visitors not exactly prepared to die for the lost cause.

“We know that the Cup is a very nice competition... but now there are other priorities,” said Mallorca coach Joaquín Caparrós, who may consider picking himself. Despite being 57.

Spain celebrate super night out in Zurich for la Liga

2013-01-08T10:50:00Z

At around eight o’clock on Monday evening Swiss time, there was only one place to be if you were anybody in the world of football: Zurich.

Unfortunately, considering La Liga Loca is a complete nobody in the world of football, while the Ballon d’Or award was being handed out in the warmth of a convention centre, the blog was doing its local duties by sitting in freezing stands beside a chimney belching out toxic fumes, as a brilliant Rayo Vallecano beat a truly awful Getafe. “The worst game in the year-and-a-half I’ve been here,” was the verdict of unimpressed Getafe boss Luis García.

Nevertheless, LLL did manage to catch all the shocks and surprises before the main gong was handed out – Leo Messi’s magnificent suit, Sergio Ramos’s latest squeeze, Gerard Piqué in the team of the year and the questionably selected unflattering photograph of José Mourinho.

At the time of the award ceremony, the Real Madrid manager was busy watching his son train for his local team – a story which made the front cover of AS in a whopping dig at Mourinho, who had claimed he would be absent because he was preparing for Wednesday’s clash with Celta Vigo.

Although LLL thinks that the whole concept of handing out individual prizes for a team event is a bit wonky, the blog would have given the Ballon d’Or to Iker Casillas on the grounds that it has a soft spot for goalkeepers, the footballer captained his club and country to fantastic years and he really, really gets on his manager’s wick, which has to be a plus point that even Barcelona fans would buy into.

Instead, Messi made sure his polka-dot outfit got a good airing with his fourth prize in a row and the general agreement in the Spanish press that the Argentinian was a deserved recipient. “Four and all those to come,” wrote AS editor Alfredo Relaño. “There hasn’t been anyone the same.” “Golden Messi!” says the front cover of Mundo Deportivo, with Sport reminding everyone that Messi is now “the best in history.”

"No, Cristiano probably couldn't pull this look off..."

Marca is chuffed about the awards' dominance by the homeland, with the front cover blasting “Spain” – in English, after a Spanish coach, Barcelona player picked up the big metaphorical gongs, and 11 la Liga footballers made the World XI team. On the one hand, it could be argued that Real Madrid and Barcelona, who contributed ten of the side, do not represent the absolute basket case of a mess that the rest of the league is in. Then again, there’s not a single footballer from the fancy-pants Premier League in sight. Indeed, there was only one England-based player in the Ballon d’Or top ten - Robin Van Persie.

It was lovely to see Vicente Del Bosque picking up another award and being a little bit cheeky in his speech, which took a small dig (although one he has since played down) at a notable absentee from the ceremony. “Everyone who is here wants to win, but we are also obliged to defend football and take care of it by offering our best personal conduct,” noted the Spain boss.

Although Marca are rather curiously already offering up a poll on who will win the next Ballon d’Or, which is just around the corner in twelve month’s time, Spain is now focussing on the Copa del Rey, with the second leg of the last 16 ties taking place this week.

Osasuna are set for a miserable night in Mestalla, with the Pamplona club 2-0 down to Valencia, although it’s the home side coach, Ernesto Valverde who doesn’t seem to be looking forward to the affair. “These games are the worst," he lamented. "We have little to win and a lot to lose.”

Meanwhile, Málaga are involved in a fun evening against third tier Eibar, although should go through after a 1-1 draw in the Basque Country just before Christmas.

Good Day, Bad Day: Barça batter Espanyol, while Adán has had enough

2013-01-07T12:12:00Z

Good Day

Tito Vilanova
Just 17 days after surgery for a glandular tumour, the Barcelona boss was back on the bench at the Camp Nou. Inspirational stuff.

Pedro
La Liga Loca feels that it’s probably been a while since the Canary Islander has appeared in the Good Day section on a Monday, but a brace in the 4-0 win against Espanyol eased a bit of the goal-scoring burden from Leo Messi's shoulders.

Cristiano Ronaldo
His team-mates may have lost their heads a little of late, but Ronaldo keeps on delivering. The brace against Real Sociedad sees the forward with 171 goals in 171 official games for his club, who really should be able to encourage Real Madrid to find enough cash lying around to keep the footballer happy with a new contract.

Betis
Still mad as a car full of spanners and still completely predictable in their unpredictability, or something like that. Betis have won six of their nine away games this season, which puts the side just behind Barcelona in the 'away league', but they are distinctly mid-table in terms of their home record despite pulling off results like beating Real Madrid in Sevilla. The latest victory away from Andalusia was a 2-1 nuzzling of Zaragoza, which put Betis back into the Champions League chase, equal on points with the potentially outcast-from-Europe-next-season Málaga.

Levante
It’s unlikely the Valencia side are going to make the Champions League places, so Levante’s aim in January and February may well be to rack up as many points as possible to reach the 42 required for survival, then give the current Europa League campaign a good old go in the spring. That challenge got off to a most brilliant start with a steamrollering of a dreadful Athletic Bilbao which left Levante on 30 points and just four more victories short of target number one of 2013. “We put the oranges out on the balcony, passed out the sweets and we’ve been left three points,” chirped a Three Kings-referencing manager, Juan Ignacio Martínez.

Sergio Ballesteros
With his appearance against Athletic Bilbao, the Levante captain triggered a clause in his current contract giving the defender another year of life at the Valencia club. Hurrah.

Valencia
Still a long way from impressing the hard to please LLL, but back-to-back wins over Getafe and Granada moves the east coast club a little nearer to the Champions League places, where the side should have been all along this season.

Iago Aspas
Celta boss Paco Herrera had been complaining that the forward had been a little off the boil of late, but Iago Aspas grabbed two goals to give Celta the side’s first victory in five games. To be fair, the striker’s second was from the spot after he himself handled the ball, but these things tend to happen in la Liga these days.

Mallorca
The point against Atlético Madrid is another step in a slow recovery process for Mallorca who have now picked up four from six to take the team out of the drop zone.

Domingos Paciencia
The new Deportivo boss was in generous mood after his debut on the Galician bench which saw a victory for his new team, a 1-0 win over Malaga. “Four training sessions aren’t very many...a lot of it was the work of the last coach. We can do better but we owe (José Luis) Oltra a big hug for what he did beforehand.”

Bad Day

Atlético Madrid
The lack of forward fire power from the Rojiblancos - who were without the suspended Falcao and Arda Turan - saw Atlético struggling to overcome Mallorca and only muster a 1-1 draw.

Antonio Adán
Real Madrid’s much-maligned No.2 goalkeeper has been caught in the media wars of late, having been the choice of José Mourinho in his battle against all things Iker Casillas. The Portuguese manager was keen to denounce boos against Adán at the Bernabeu by Real Madrid fans, and the keeper himself sounded more than a little fed up with the whole business, having been sent off just seven minutes into the 4-3 win at Real Sociedad. “Things have been said to me that show a complete lack of respect,” was the rightful gripe of a player that has been at Real Madrid for 17 years.

Xabi Prieto
The Real Sociedad midfielder had to experience the mixed joy and despair of scoring a hat-trick at the Santiago Bernabeu and still being on the end of a defeat.

Valladolid
The defeat to Celta continues a bit of an iffy run of late, with three defeats and a draw from the side’s last four matches.

Zaragoza
The yin to the yang of Betis. While the aforementioned Sevilla side having won six of their nine away matches, Zaragoza have contrived to lose six from nine at home. “Once more, the loss was not fair and came due to clear individual errors,” complained coach, Manolo Jiménez, moaning that without unfair pesky errors creeping into the side, Zaragoza would be top of the table.

Marcelo Bielsa
Defeats either side of the Christmas break left the tiny hope of a recovery for Athletic squashed under the ironing board of reality. Nevertheless, Marcelo decided to make things worse by admitting that Levante didn’t play particularly well in a match that still saw Athletic defeated. “I hope I don’t upset the supporters of the local team but Levante didn’t attack nor defend as they normally do, but despite this they beat us,” complained the Argentinean on a side who apparently scored three goals without attacking.

Aymeric Laporte
LLL isn't sure if the young centre-back was sent off for a last-ditch tackle gone wrong, or rolling around pretending to be injured in a cunning plan to avoid the incoming card.

Granada
Poor Granada. The team are having to stumble along with strikers who given enough chances to score goals but proceed to blow them over the bar from two yards and refereeing decisions such as the one that sent off Mikel Rico in the 2-1 home defeat to Valencia for a non-existent hand ball.

José Luis Mendilibar
It was quite the rant by the Pamplona boss after the 1-0 defeat to Sevilla, with the struggling manager complaining that “it’s very easy to whistle against Osasuna.” Mendilibar was moaning about a goal ruled out for Osasuna for handball (correct decision) and an offside during Sevilla’s winner (debatable). However, Mendilibar was fortunate that his side weren’t down to ten men in the first half after goalkeeper, Andrés, took out Alvaro Negredo outside of his box.

La Preview: Rayo’s magic man, Barça's brilliant news and fined footballing fatties

2013-01-04T08:30:00Z

Friday

Zaragoza (12th) v Betis (5th) - 21.30 (all kick-offs local time)
Another transfer window means another attempt by Pepe Mel and his Betis bosses to hang on to the club’s more decent players. Once again, Beñat is the target for many a club, however Pepe Mel and Betis are playing hardball with the footballer and any potential suitors by copying the Manuel Pellegrini/Santi Cazorla/line-in-the-sand approach which wasn’t entirely successful in the end, to be fair. “Beñat’s clause is €20m and he will only go for €20m,” rebel-yelled Pepe Mel. “To sell him for less than that would be a disaster. The club has to defend its position and Beñat knows this."
Pepe has another battle over José Alberto Cañas who has been linked with Swansea due to his contract being over and done with at Betis in June, not that the boss has too many concerns about that. “I have the 100% security of knowing that he won’t be staying with us past 30th June. Knowing the commitment he has for the club and his teammates, he is going to give 100% while he’s here. Therefore, he’s going to play on Friday.”
LLL Prediction - Away Win

Saturday

Levante (6th) v Athletic Bilbao (13th) - 16.00
Getting football types to sum up a calendar a year is a tricky business due to the August-to-May nature of the game in most countries, rather than January to December. It’s a bit like asking to offer New Year’s Resolutions in June. Anyway, the big man of Levante, Sergio Ballesteros, was probed on his thoughts on the year gone by and was game in discussing what was in actual fact a brilliant 12 months for himself and Levante. “Perhaps it’s been the most important season for the club. We played in Europe, got out of the group stages and were leaders at the start of last year.” 2012 will be remembered better “after the passing of time,” mused the stout defender.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Granada (15th) v Valencia (9th) - 18.00
It’s not exactly up to date news, but LLL spotted perhaps the longest sign on the smallest piece of paper ever in images from Mestalla during Valencia’s 4-2 win over Getafe. An ambitious supporter wanted to communicate good will to the Barça boss, his animosity to Valencia’s president and also reference the Mayan apocalypse prediction all in one message. “Today, the world ends; but no! What is ending is the leadership of Señor Llorente. Support and love for Tito Vil and family from a Valencianista.” All on a piece of paper about 12 inches squared.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Deportivo (20th) v Málaga (4th) - 20.00
Happy financial times at both clubs. Deportivo went into administration and Málaga are still wondering why they have been banned from European competitions for at least a year from next season, and what they can do about it. When institutional punishments are handed out in Spain, the usual tactic is to issue a denial, complain that it’s not fair and hope the matter goes away. And, normally, that works. LLL feels sure that pretty much every club in la Liga has some kind of stadium ban yet to be imposed from the past 15 years.
But Málaga are dealing with those pen pushers at UEFA rather than Spanish authorities, so have moved onto the ‘it’s not fair’ phase quite swiftly. The initial reaction to the punishment meted out for having outstanding debts of Director General, Vicente Casado, was to say that “we are totally convinced we are right.” Seeing that this is not the strongest of defences, Casado has since claimed that the ban was “a mistake, a misunderstanding,” and that the main debt the club has is a €10m one with the tax man but with an agreed repayment structure in place. Probably called Project Isco.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sevilla (14th) v Osasuna (19th) - 22.00
It was a bleak Christmas for these two clubs, who both went into the winter break with rather poor results, and it’s tough to decide which was worse. Sevilla lost 2-1 at Real Sociedad to drop the team into 14th, just four points off the relegation zone. Meanwhile Osasuna were dumped second-from-bottom of the table by fellow bottom-dwellers, Granada, losing 2-1 at home. Sevilla, though, have tried to cheer themselves up with a little pressie by purchasing Bosnian midfielder, Miroslav Stevanovic, who joins for the princely sum of €1m.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Celta Vigo (17th) v Valladolid (11th) - 12.00
In a move that might have bankrupted the aforementioned Sergio Ballesteros were he playing for Valladolid, manager Miroslav Djukic set up a fining system at the club for any player who came back from their winter holidays carrying more than 1.5 kilos of ‘excess baggage’. Every 100 grammes over this limit saw a €100 fine for the footballers. “They are professionals, they know they have to take care of themselves,” retorted Valladolid’s optimistic Serbian coach.
Meanwhile, Celta Vigo are a little concerned over a drop in form for striker, Iago Aspas, whose head may have been turned by talk of a move to less fishier surroundings than the Galician coast. That’s certainly the opinion of Paco Herrera who feels that the forward has “little birds in his head. It’s worrying as we need him at 100%.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (3rd) v Real Sociedad (7th) - 17.00
Scoffs, chortles, sulks and sullen faces are the normal features of the Real Madrid press room at Valdebebas, as generally it’s just José Mourinho who speaks to the press, aside from the odd drone from Aitor Karanka - individual chats with players were banned some time ago. But that changed this week with the previous policy being overturned and some big dressing room hitters in the form of Iker Casillas, Cristiano Ronaldo and Sergio Ramos turning up to deny that the league title race is over, or that there’s disharmony in the ranks and in the Real Madrid captain’s case, to announce with a completely straight face that he was looking forward to winning back his place from Antonio Adán.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Espanyol (18th) - 19.00
Two fantastic stories from the Camp Nou this week and both concern amazing people bouncing back from very tough times. Some 13 days after an operation in his battle against cancer, Tito Vilanova was back both at his office at the Camp Nou and also leading a training session. At the same practice was Eric Abidal who is slowly getting back to fitness, with Mundo Deportivo reporting that the Frenchman may well be formally brought back into the Barça squad for the rest of the campaign. “They give us a lot of energy and desire to keep on achieving success every season,” beamed Víctor Valdés.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mallorca (16th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 21.00
A victory over Beris thanks to a penalty that shouldn’t have been in his side's last pre-break fixture saw Mallorca manager Joaquín Caparrós change from being inhumanely cheerful despite the conditions, to being very inhumanely cheerful despite the conditions. In summing up 2012, Caparrós said that it had been an “enriching year” and that “the balance on the whole has been positive and I’ve received the support of the fans and obviously I want to give it back.” There are plenty of new leaves to be turned over as well in the Balearics with the Mallorca boss proclaiming that “the aim of the team is to begin 2013 with our desire renewed.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Monday

Rayo Vallecano (8th) v Getafe (10th) - 20.00
Because Rayo and particularly their supporters have been so vocal about Monday night matches, 'the Powers that Be' have punished the Madrid team even further by scheduling another match in that time slot, with a sexy side called Getafe as the visitors. But enough of such complaints. LLL has found out something even more brilliant about an already brilliant club.
Manager, Paco Jémez, is the son of a Flamenco singer, has a golf handicap and a bit of a David Copperfield. “I like tricks, close-hand magic with cards,” revealed the Rayo boss to AS. “It used to pass some time when I was with friends when we were away, but not to put on a show.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mourinho makes waves while Deportivo make changes

2013-01-02T14:24:00Z

(L-R) Mourinho, Vilanova, Oltra and new Deportivo boss Paciencia

In last year's final episode of la Liga, desperate viewers were left dangling by their Primera-loving pinkies, thanks to a whopper of a cliff-hanger served up by José Mourinho. The Real Madrid manager decided to respond to Florentino Pérez’s public plea for a quiet life by first dropping the World Cup-winning, Real Madrid-leading Iker Casillas for the match against Málaga, then promptly lost 3-2 to the aforementioned side to go into the festive period 16 points behind Barcelona.

In fact, things are so bad at the Santiago Bernabéu these days, that LLL is going to make a stylistic correction and note that from this day forward Madrid are "seven points behind Atlético", a more realistic target than Barcelona, who are now in a different footballing galaxy to everyone else.

The blog was contemplating whether Mourinho would shut up shop for the holiday period, feeling suitably chastened by recent results, but instead the Madrid manager made a special effort to note during the Globe Soccer awards (prizes largely given to Jorge Mendes clients and clubs - Falcao, Mourinho, Atlético Madrid - and Jorge Mendes himself) that everything that had happened in Málaga was a useful reminder that the only constant in football was that the coach still picked the team. How long this particular one will do so remains to be seen.

Barcelona actually had proper, real life concerns to handle with the health of Tito Vilanova, but the fantastically positive news is that an operation on the Barça coach on the 20th December was a successful one. Reports in the papers on Wednesday suggest the Catalan may even be back on the bench for Sunday’s derby clash against Espanyol, which would be a wonderful sight indeed.

It was a bad Christmas oop north in Spain with José Luis Oltra losing his job at Deportivo, with the club bottom-of-the-table and just two league wins from 17. However, LLL must admit that it was a little surprised to see that it was the first sacking of a manager by club president, Augusto Lendoiro, since 1997. “We understand that a change was necessary, the situation was irreversible,” revealed the portly president who deliberately waited until after the Christmas break to give the news to his former employee. “I’m still very surprised, it’s not normal at this club,” admitted the outgoing coach who lead Deportivo to the second division title last season, in the team’s single campaign in the badlands.

Deportivo have appointed a Portuguese manager to take Oltra’s place in the form of former Portuguese international striker and mastermind behind Sporting Braga’s recent success, Domingos Paciencia. The coach’s first two jobs were to defend his appointment by claiming that it had nothing to do with a certain agent who has a lot of influence at Deportivo having his way. “Have you seen the influence of (Jorge) Mendes with me? No, you are wrong,” said Paciencia to one particularly humbled hack. The second was to dismiss the notion that just because he was Portuguese, the footballers of the same nationality were going to be favoured considering there are seven of them currently in the Deportivo squad.

Aside from those rumblings in Galicia, everyone else managed to keep their jobs - even Michel at Sevilla - so it was a fairly happy Christmas all round for 19 managers in la Liga.

La Preview: BAU for Barça, Málaga’s extra incentive and Simeone's festive dash

2012-12-20T14:12:00Z

Thursday

Rayo Vallecano (10th) v Levante (6th) - 20.00 (all kick-offs are local time)
Once again, Rayo find themselves playing a game at the most inconvenient possible time for the club’s supporters, who just so happen to be the most vociferously against the rubbishy scheduling which often sees the Vallecas side’s matches plonked in the graveyard zone of la Liga. “We’re fed up with playing on Friday or Monday night and have kick-off times that no-one else gets. We want to play on a Saturday at 20.00 or Sunday at 17.00. It’s not fair,” sulked Rayo's Piti ahead of Thursday evening's match. The good news is that it does at least see him and his teammates get more holiday than those playing on Saturday night in the final matches before the Christmas break.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Real Sociedad (9th) v Sevilla (13th) - 22.00
It's heart-warming stuff in San Sebastian, where Real Sociedad players are set to wear shirts with names of club members on the front for the visit of Sevilla - a way of thanking the side’s fans for their constant support (leaving aside the frequent booing of coach, Philippe Montanier).
The names of those lucky supporters were picked out in a draw with Real Sociedad president, Jokin Aperribay, speechifying that “the soul of a club, its reason for being, are its fans and, together with them, the most important thing a club has is its shirt and that’s why we thought that the best way to unite the two was to put the names of the supporters on the shirt.”
But that’s not all. Oh no. The club president also noted that “What’s more, (the names) will be close to the hearts of the players.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Espanyol (19th) v Deportivo (20th) - 22.00
It’s not going to be the happiest of Yuletides at Deportivo, with the club so broke that LLL imagines Riki all with the ‘please sir, can I have some more’ at the players’ Christmas dinner, with the blog getting its Charles Dickens stories mixed up. Deportivo could be going into administration before the end of 2012 if there’s no resolution with the tax-man over repayment of outstanding debts, a government agency which has placed an embargo on income to the club. “It doesn’t matter if we go into administration,” said club president Augusto Lendoiro, “the viability of the club is totally assured.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Friday

Valencia (11th) v Getafe (7th) - 20.00
Ever-irate Valencia fans were once again calling for the resignation of club president Manuel Llorente after last weekend’s home defeat to Rayo Vallecano left the team mid-table, seven points off the top four. Apparently, such a move was considered by the Mestalla big wig soon after, with a board meeting on Tuesday, but such drastic and free-lunch-ruining action was swiftly ruled out. “Personally, it would give me a lot of peace if I went, but we have duties and a path of responsibility. This doesn’t mean I’ll be staying in the role from June, because I only think of tomorrow.” To be fair, not considering anything more than 24 hours ahead is what got the club into the financial mess in which they find themselves today.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Celta Vigo (15th) - 22.00
It was a bit of a disappointing morning for LLL, with the discovery that the lack of a Christmas card from Diego Simeone wasn’t down to the Atlético Madrid boss being too busy to send one, but rather the fact the blog hadn’t made it onto the Argentinean’s list in the first place. Never mind. Had it done so, it would have got a lovely card with the legend, “dreams are extremely important, nothing can be done without imagining it first” on the cover. According to Marca, Simeone is set to be absent from the press conference after the Celta match due to the fact the manager has a plane leaving for Argentina and his Christmas hols at 00.35. The problem is that the game will finish around 23.50. TV companies should televise his rush to the airport as well as the game. Really wouldn’t want to get in Simeone’s way in that particular dash...
LLL Prediction - Home win

Saturday

Betis (5th) v Mallorca (18th) - 16.00
Oh dear. Whilst everything appears to be going brilliantly for Betis, with Pepe Mel admitting with glee that the team are in some kind of dream land at the moment, it’s pretty awful for Mallorca, who have now gone thirteen games in the league and cup without a victory. There are tiny signs of improvement though, and Joaquín Caparrós is still doing the usual fighting talk about getting up nine times after being knocked down on eight occasions. It’s the same vibe from the players too, with midfielder Javi Márquez, heaving that “we need to keep on working in the same way and think that we can play well because we are strong group.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Valladolid (8th) v Barcelona (1st) - 18.00
What a horrible Wednesday for Barcelona. The same day Eric Abidal was supposed to have been welcomed back into training with champagne, the news was broken to the players that Tito Vilanova had suffered a cancer relapse. The message from a brilliantly cool, calm and composed Sporting Director, Andoni Zubizaretta during the press conference that same evening, though, was to keep calm, carry on, wish nothing but a speedy recovery to Tito and have faith in the coaching structure in place at the club. “We’ll have Tito watching (the Valladolid match) on TV and I’m sure there’ll be corrections made,” joked the former goalkeeper.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Osasuna (16th) v Granada (17th) - 20.00
LLL imagines that Granada would be a lovely place to reside, so it’s only fair that its residents have to suffer some kind of pay-back in life. Those who are fans of the local football team are doing so in spades at the moment, with Granada having failed to score now in five league games, and unlikely to do against an Osasuna team who can be adroit at shutting up shop in Pamplona. “It can happen at any moment,” promised Granada defender, Brayan Angulo, when discussing the chances of a goal some time soon.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (4th) v Real Madrid (3rd) - 20.00
There’s nothing that gives incentive to a footballer quite like some extra time off - aside from free cash and shiny stuff - and this is the prize being dangled in front of the Málaga players, who were promised an extra two days Christmas holidays should they reach the winter break with 30 points or more. The southern side currently have 28 and have a Real Madrid team who are wobbly to say the least on the road as the visitors, and a team who will probably every minute of their own time off cancelled by José Mourinho, should the capital city club trip up again on their travels.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Athletic Bilbao v Zaragoza - 22.00
LLL doesn’t really get it, but there you go. Athletic Bilbao had a Fernando Llorente last summer who wanted to leave and clubs willing to pay €20m for the striker. These offers were turned down and the forward was then sent into a near exile with just the one start in la Liga, rather than having every goal squeezed out of him. However, there’s still time to cash in on the Spanish international with suitors such as Juventus still interested in January. But nope. No sale is going to be made according to Athletic president, Josu Urrutia, who spoke on Tuesday to announce that “the decision is taken, the team is more competitive with him.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barça's celebrations turn to sorrow within just 24 hours

2012-12-19T20:27:00Z

In the end, Barcelona fans were only able to celebrate the news of the contract renewals of three pillars of the club - Leo Messi, Xavi Hernández and Carles Puyol - for 24 hours. “Eternal” read the front cover of Wednesday’s edition of Mundo Deportivo, alongside the faces of the three footballers; an indication of the joy this had brought to a club already buoyed by being top of la Liga, 13 points ahead of Real Madrid.

Later the same morning, an announcement was posted on the Barcelona website that all the club’s official activities, including a speech by club president Sandro Rosell and a Christmas lunch for the media, had been suspended. Mundo Deportivo then reported that Tito Vilanova had suffered a relapse and a new tumour had been discovered during a routine check-up on Tuesday at the Vall d’Hebrón hospital, where the 44-year-old was treated for his original cancer. Truly awful news for a rookie manager already seemingly at the peak of his powers just seven months into one of the most demanding jobs in world football - making the best club in the world even better.

However, such is the impatience of this modern internet-heavy world of ours, speculation as to who would be taking over from the Barça coach was already rife, despite the fact absolutely no confirmation of any kind had been made by the club in regards to Vilanova’s condition, or anything else for that matter. Indeed, clubs, players and various organisations were publishing official declarations of support for the Camp Nou manager’s battle even before Barcelona themselves revealed what that fight may be.

That moment didn’t arrive into the early on Wednesday evening, once the Barcelona players were informed of the situation, with a brief medical report published on the club website stating that there had been “a change of condition” for the Barça manager, and that surgery would be taking place on Thursday morning, followed by three to four days in hospital. A course of radiotherapy and chemotherapy would then take place for a period of six weeks, though the coach “may be able to mix work with the treatment.”

Sadly, it’s a horribly familiar scenario for Tito Vilanova. On the November 22nd 2011, Barcelona announced that their then assistant manager needed urgent surgery to remove a tumor from his parotid gland. After six days in hospital, Vilanova was able to return home, and by December 7th he was back taking training with the first team. Even more positive news was to come on the 12th May this year, with the announcement from the Barça manager’s doctor that Vilanova was “well, cured and free of illness.” By that time, the Catalan had been appointed as Pep Guardiola’s replacement for upcoming campaign, a season that by now has seen the club make a record-breaking start with 15 victories and a draw from the side’s first 16 matches. Indeed, such a serious illness having been overcome just a year before was often overlooked such was the way that a confident Vilanova had been taking everything in his stride.

There’s no doubt Vilanova has a challenging time ahead over the coming months, but he has the support of an outstanding club, players and millions of fans and well-wishers around the world to help him through. However, for Tito, the battle against his condition does not concern himself and his own troubles, but his family. In an interview recorded in September with television station TV3, Tito Vilanova spoke about the impact the diagnosis from the previous year had had on his life. “When they told me what I had, it was a hard moment and I thought more about my children than me. I believed they still needed me.”

Quick-off-the-mark Mourinho wins unlikely support from Catalan capital

2012-12-18T14:17:00Z

It’s a good job La Liga Loca is a fine physical specimen with cat-like reflexes, or it might not have been one of the few gossip-spreading muck-rakers to have witnessed José Mourinho stick his bottom lip out and give up on the pursuit of Barcelona, even before the Catalan club had picked up another three points against the ever-generous Atlético Madrid at the Camp Nou.

The customary routine in such post-match matters is to allow the press to actually get to the press conference, rather than try to beat them to it. Indeed, the customary routine is to allow the visiting manager to have his say first, the notion being that they most likely have to make a long journey home, and the earlier the start the better. But on Saturday night, the white-flag-waving Portuguese coach was admitting that the jig was up while everyone else in the room was still unpacking their laptops. That certainly irked AS editor Alfredo Relaño, who in Tuesday morning's edition grumbled that it was “a discourtesy against the visiting team.”

Given there are unlikely to be any sightings of Mourinho until Friday's pre-Málaga presser - and even then, it could well be Aitor Karanka turning up in his stead - the Madrid papers will be stringing out this particular goldmine of a story for as long as possible.

Don't pout, Jose...

If Mourinho's surrender was Monday's big story, Tuesday was centred on Florentino Pérez's remarks at a charity event that “as a principle, Real Madrid never gives up”. Heck, even Carles Puyol waded in to stick up for his rivals, saying that “if there’s a team that doesn’t give up, it’s Real Madrid.” Indeed, a kind and considering Camp Nou crowd were backing Mourinho too, with chants of “Mourinho we love you, Mourinho please stay.”

However, it isn’t just the Spanish media who like to keep things rumbling along for as long as possible, but also the Spanish league. Round 16 of la Primera began on Friday night and finished four days later with the completion of Celta Vigo against Betis, a match which ended up as 1-0 win in Galicia for the Sevilla side. The victory sees Betis in fifth, level on 28 points with Málaga, something that tickled Pepe Mel pink. “The absolute priority is to stay up, so it’s wonderful to be where we are with such young players. It’s a dream to be there, and we must hold on to this and not let the dream go.” Beautiful.

There were no happy faces in la Coruña though, with Deportivo only managing a goalless draw against the visiting Valladolid, leaving the team rock bottom of the table with just two victories from 16. “The team has improved but we didn’t win,” sighed coach, José Luis Oltra, whose players had to suffer some of the team’s Ultras hanging around outside the stadium to give them their small pieces of mind on the state of affairs at the club.

Just to make matters a touch more confusing, there’s a delayed first leg, last 16 Copa del Rey match on Tuesday night between third tier Basque side Eibar and Málaga, who will be resting eight first-teamers in preparation for the visit of Real Madrid on Saturday, a match which looks like turning into a whopper of a game of football.

Good Day, Bad Day: Mourinho gives up, Messi gets lazy and Rayo make history

2012-12-17T10:41:00Z

Good Day

Barcelona
Knowing that Real Madrid had dropped yet more points, Barça could have spread out a picnic rug in the centre-circle, read poetry, knotted daisies into each other’s air and let Atlético do whatever they wanted for 90 minutes, knowing that their lead over their old chums from the capital would still be a monumental one.
That probably would have resulted in a 2-0 advantage after 10 minutes, with Diego Godín left to his own special devises. But Barça managed to pull out yet another victory, despite going behind to a rampant Falcao effort in the first half, a lead that was only permitted to last five minutes. The tricky job of Tito Vilanova now is to keep on insisting that the title race isn’t over, despite Atlético Madrid being nine points behind and Real Madrid distracted by tussle for a Champions League spot with Málaga and Levante.

Falcao
Needed a decent performance and a goal after disappearing against Real Madrid, and that’s what the Colombian delivered in the first half at the Camp Nou.

Manuel Pellegrini
This is set up quite beautifully as a pre-Christmas finale. Three wins from four - the most recent being a 2-0 victory at Sevilla - sees Málaga back on track in la Liga, with just the final date next week against a side with iffy away form and led by a certain down-in-the-dumps Portuguese coach who once sniffed that he wouldn’t ever dream of lowering himself to managing a club such as Málaga.

Gustavo Munúa
Time for a little bit of love for the grizzled Levante goalkeeper (37 years old) who kept a second clean sheet in a row for his side in la Liga, to give another victory to the mighty Valencia team after a 1-0 win at Zaragoza. Also helping out in defence were Sergio Ballesteros (37), Juanfran (36) and Dirty David Navarro (32).

Getafe
What the Lords of Football doth take away in cruel hot pokers of misfortune, they then doth giveth back quite quickly sometimes. Last weekend at Real Sociedad, the mighty Geta were seconds away from a victory but conceded a goal in injury time to leave Luis García dreaming about what might have been. Against Osasuna on Saturday in a match where not a great deal happened until the final minutes, *** Sola’s odd effort looked like producing a home defeat for Getafe. But in injury time the linesman and referee popped up to award a spot-kick for a handball that never was from Puñal to leave the score 1-1.

Chori Domínguez
Valencia's supporters were on the hefty back of the Rayo forward from the off after a bit of a disappointing spell in Mestalla with the local fans yelling “drunk” at the Argentine. But it was Chori who put away a penalty seven minutes from the end to award Rayo a wonderfully surprising away win. “Chori responded as he had to, with a great game,” said Rayo boss, Paco Jémez, after the match.

Valencia fans
Always prepared. Supposedly easy home game against Rayo, a side who have never won in Mestalla in la Liga. A brand new coach to welcome. But the home support still bring their white hankies to wave in disgust at the end of the game, just in case.

Aritz Aduriz
‘Booooom!’ popped LLL’s mind after seeing the immensely powerful header from Aduriz to give Athletic Bilbao a narrow 1-0 victory over one of his former clubs in the shape of Mallorca. With Fernando Llorente even more outcast than before, an awful lot of goal-scoring pressure has been piled onto the creaking striker’s shoulders this season. Nevertheless, Aduriz has popped in 9 from open play, just two less than Falcao and one less than Ronaldo.

Granada
Sort of good day for Granada, in that the Andalusian side didn’t lose in what ended up being a goalless draw at home to Real Sociedad. The bad side to the result though is that it sees Granada going five league matches without a goal with €5m signing, Youssef El Arabi, starting the clash against the Basques on the bench, a whopping signing that hasn’t worked too well for Granada so far.

Kiko Casilla
The Espanyol goalkeeper may sound like a two year old trying to pronounce the name of his counterpart for Real Madrid on Sunday night, but the Perico had a sparkling performance to frustrate Real Madrid for those moments during the game when the home side were beginning to click.

Bad Day

Leo Messi
Snore. Another brace for the Argentinean. How about a hat-trick some time, lazy Leo?

Real Madrid
Thirteen points off Barcelona and with 15 dropped so far this season, Real Madrid have lost more points by the middle of December than in the entire 2011/12 campaign. AS point out with some dejection that the 100 points tally in la Primera is now impossible.

José Mourinho
A lousy weekend all round really for the Real Madrid boss. It began on Saturday afternoon with the story of a Radio Marca journalist being taken off to a side room after the pre-Espanyol press conference to be grilled by the Madrid boss over a source in the dressing room for a story about the unpopularity of the club’s goalkeeping coach with the players.
“In the world of football, I and my people are the “top” and in the world of journalism you are a sh*t,” was the alleged accusation to Antón Meana in a report by the journalist of the meeting in Sunday’s edition of Marca.
Rather than continuing to grump after Sunday's 2-2 draw with Espanyol, the Portuguese boss was entirely dejected, admitting that winning the league was “practically impossible” despite it still being December. Bernd Schuster was practically fired for saying that winning a single game of football was more or less impossible. Such defeatism isn’t supposed to be the Real Madrid way. José Mourinho now looks like a figure who simply doesn’t know what to do with his team, both on and off the field.

Valencia
At least the fans weren’t calling for the head of the manager in the side’s first game in Mestalla under Ernesto Valverde, which ended up being a rather surprising 1-0 defeat to Rayo Vallecano to give Valencia a second league defeat at their ground in a row. However, the supporters did once again call for the departure of club president, Manuel Llorente, who will soon be running out of minions to sack if this current form carries on. “I can’t talk much about the public,” admitted Valverde wisely, “I’m new here.”

Sevilla
A promising first half for Sevilla thrown into the bin in the second 45 minutes with a 2-0 home defeat to Málaga that really didn’t go down well with the Sánchez Pizjuán support who are witnessing a wretched league campaign which sees two wins in eleven games and just one point from the last 12. “You shouldn’t be worrying about my situation...but of the club,” said Michel the Manager to the press after the defeat.

Fazio
A second sending off for the defender who is more clumsy than clattering this season.

Zaragoza
As ever with Zaragoza, if Helder Postiga is not quite at the races then the Aragonese side struggles to perform.

Osasuna
LLL can imagine the swearing from the Osasuna bench and José Luis Mendilibar in particular was something to behold with a bad call from the refereeing team, taking away two points from his Osasuna side in injury time against Getafe. “I don’t think they were too sure. They took a long time to blow for the penalty. This creates doubts,” complained the Pamplona-based coach on a decision that cost Osasuna just the side’s second away win of the league campaign.

Mallorca
Yes, the 1-0 defeat to visiting Athletic Bilbao sees Mallorca with just two points from 33, but at least the Balearic club didn’t lose 5-0 as they managed to do during the week in the cup to Sevilla. The defence was a little more solid, and there was a tad more action up front, too, although Mallorca really need someone scrappy to go off someone’s posterior to get the side going again. “The team had soul and gave everything,” said a typically pugnacious Joaquín Caparrós after the clash which saw Mallorca slip into the relegation zone.

La Preview: Florentino flirts with Falcao as Betis boss gets a battering

2012-12-14T13:32:00Z

SATURDAY

Getafe (7th) v Osasuna (16th) – 16.00 (all kick-offs local Spanish time)
Another tough gig for Getafe’s marketing bod will be trying to get the crowds packed into the Coliseum at the beginning of 2013 for the side’s last 16, second-leg Copa del Rey clash against Atlético Madrid. Getafe contrived to lose 3-0 at the Vicente Calderón on Wednesday, with forlorn midfielder Juan Rodríguez admitting that “everyone is angry at the result.”
Still, the job of tempting fans into the ground was made a tad easier this week with news that the club’s season ticket holder numbers had grown by 800 to 6,500, with passes to the second half of the campaign costing just €80 for existing members. Which sounds an excellent deal, quite frankly.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Mallorca (17th) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) – 18.00
With Athletic out in the previous round of the Copa del Rey and Mallorca pretty much out in the current one after Wednesday’s awful 5-0 home defeat to Sevilla, it'll be a fairly sombre affair on Saturday in the Balearics for what could become the final match for Joaquín Caparrós – against the last Spanish team ‘Jokin’ managed.
The coaches' reaction to their respective mid-week setbacks ranged from the predictable with Marcelo Bielsa admitting that the knock-out to lower league Eibar was “unjustifiable” to the wonderfully barking mad with Caparrós insisting that, “if you knock me down seven times, I’ll get up eight times, and if you knock me down eight times, I’ll get up nine times, you’re going to have to kill me.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Granada (18th) v Real Sociedad (9th) – 20.00
It’s been 377 minutes since Granada scored a league goal, but that hasn’t prevented the club from pleading with fans to come to the stadium for Saturday’s game to watch their players spending 90 minutes shooting high and wide. A video on the club’s website implores locals to the game, perhaps to watch the sacking of Granada boss Juan Antonio Anquela if the result isn’t a good one.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Sevilla (11th) v Málaga (4th) – 22.00
Michel the Manager bought himself a little bit more credit after a torrid time in la Liga with the 5-0 thrashing of Mallorca on Wednesday night, revealing the “hidden face” of the team “that sometimes appears.” Nevertheless, Michel had been backed quite forcibly even before the game by José María del Nido: “We question the results but absolutely not the coach. He has the absolute confidence of the board and the sporting leadership,” parped the president. Málaga’s own first round last 16 clash will take place next Tuesday against Eibar.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SUNDAY

Zaragoza (12th) v Levante (6th) – 12.00
Hello again! These two teams are having some kind of footballing “come dine with me” experience this week. On Thursday, Zaragoza travelled to Levante’s house in the Copa del Rey and had a fine time all round with a 1-0 win. “We’ve done half the job against a great team,” said happy Zaragoza gaffer Manolo Jiménez. It’s Zaragoza’s turn to host Levante on Sunday and come up with something tasty for their visitors, who will be returning in January for the second leg of the cup game.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Valencia (10th) v Rayo Vallecano (13th) – 17.00
Empty stands are not a rare sight in la Liga these days, with Marca reporting that only two matches – the Madrid derby and El Clásico – have sold out this season. An empty end at Rayo was a tad unusual on Monday though, as it was the home of the Bukaneros, the club’s wonderfully fanatical Ultras.
However, the supporters had decided to leave that end vacant during the Zaragoza clash as a protest at the kick-off time, the fifth that Rayo had suffered on that day this season. “People who do this are harming us. They think we are idiots,” fumed Rayo manager Paco Jémez. “These Monday nights are killing us, we need people behind us.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Real Madrid (3rd) v Espanyol (19th) – 19.00
José Mourinho reappeared on Wednesday night after seven days of Karanka-world and the grumble after the defeat at Celta Vigo focused on one particular player. Discussing the decision to leave Alvaro Morata out of the matchday squad, the Portuguese pointed out that the young forward “had more ambition than one player who didn’t want to play this match, in the cold and rain.”
Normally, Karim Benzema is the footballer who feels Mourinho’s wrath when effort is lacking – but this time the focus is on Angel di María who was hauled off at half-time, a move that has Friday’s AS fretting about the footballer’s form.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) – 21.00
It was fun and japes at the 2012 AS awards this week, with Florentino Pérez in attendance and enthusiastically greeting Falcao after the striker's five-goal performance against Deportivo. The Madrid president joked during din-dins that he needed a serviette, referring to the secretive method that saw Zidane signed. Cheerless Diego Simeone killed all the fun though when asked about the incident by stating simply that “I didn’t see it.” Boo.
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY

Deportivo (20th) v Valladolid (8th) – 20.00
In many ways, it makes perfect sense. Pretty much everyone in Spain is complaining about Monday night football on the grounds that fans would prefer to watch their matches during times when they are not rushing from work, looking after children or supposedly going to sleep.
The response from the TV companies and Spanish League has been to take heed of such moans, and punish them by sticking two matches on Monday night. Anyway, this game could see the end of the reign of José Luis Oltra if bottom-of-the-table Deportivo don’t dispose of Valladolid. “It’s a final,” admits Depor keeper Daniel Aranzubia.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Celta Vigo (15th) v Betis (5th) – 21.30
Ouch. Jonathan Pereira wasn’t very pleasant to Betis boss Pepe Mel after being loaned out to Villarreal this week, in what the player feels is a scapegoating after the 5-0 defeat to Sevilla. “He decided to sell me as the bad guy to win applause, as from that moment, everything was difficult for him. I wasn’t expecting nor looking for a way out but as I said he’s the manager, he’s the one who wants to be the big boss rather than support his players.”
LLL Prediction – Draw

Cold, late, expensive, pointless - it's the Copa del Rey!

2012-12-12T10:46:00Z

With all the aimless staring out the window that La Liga Loca likes to indulge in, the blog must admit that it is finding it quite hard to keep up with this football lark. Ooh! A green birdie just flew past! Round 15 of la Liga started last Friday at 21:30 and ended around eleven on Monday night with Zaragoza beating Rayo 2-0. Then again, it's entirely possible that this was actually round 16 kicking off, as the league's time-tables are utterly insane this season.

Tuesday night saw Valencia trudging back to Pamplona, a city they had last visited as recently as Saturday, in order to take on Osasuna for a second time in four days, this time in the first leg of their last-sixteen Copa del Rey clash. Ernesto Valverde's side managed to do twice as well as they had done at the weekend, winning 2-0 thanks to goals from Dani Parejo (that honestly wasn't a typo) and Roberto Soldado. Pesky things, Osasuna boss José Luis Mendilibar moaned after the match - "they won with just two details," was the grumble from the 51-year-old.

Valencia's two-goal lead plonks the Mestalla men in the favourites' high-chair to progress and take on either Celta Vigo or Real Madrid in the next round, with Osasuna needing a big turnaround in the second leg in a month's time. Yes, that's right, a month's time. The tie was originally supposed to be next week to add some vague form of continuity and tension to the affair, but an error was spotted a couple of weeks back when the Spanish FA realised that their games were going to collide with the final round of la Liga before the Christmas break.

Returning to the scene of the 1-0 win: Valencia were back at Osasuna in no time

Real Madrid, who have been lousy on the road in Spain this season, bar decent performances against Barça and Mallorca, are at Celta Vigo for the first time in five years, and the home side are expecting the rarest of occasions these days in Spain - a sell-out crowd - and that's despite the fact the game won't finish until about midnight.

"This match is for enjoying and our (league game) on Monday is the time to suffer," beamed Celta manager, Paco Herrera, safe in the knowledge that however impressive a result his side achieve in Balaídos, it will probably be overturned in seconds at the Bernabeu sometime in 2014 when the second leg takes place.

Over in the Real Madrid camp, Aitor Karanka said that...actually, nobody cared what the second-in-command had to say, and that's the whole point. José Mourinho is the star attraction, and has been hiding off screen now for a week in order to get the punters salivating as they wonder what gibberish he's going to come up with next.

Kicking off at the same time will be Atlético Madrid against Getafe in a Vicente Calderón that will be utterly freezing, with a cloudless Madrid night sky turning anyone not moving around the pitch in a particularly vigorous fashion into ice within seconds. Miguel Torres better watch himself, then. "The Copa is as important as la Liga which is as important as the Europa League," barked the ever cheerful Diego Simeone.

Two hours before that, Barcelona are heading down south to second division side Córdoba. The Andalusian outfit are currently safely nestled somewhere near the middle of their own league, and are therefore able to look forward to seeing Leo Messi knocking six past them without too much stress. They could even witness something rather rare - David Villa playing for Barcelona.

"This is like a Champions League final for Córdoba," warned a cheery Tito Vilanova, who is traveling with an impressively strong squad for the clash with just the one cantera 'youngster'. "It's how I see the game and it's why I'm sorry. I would have preferred to play against a Primera side. It's been 40 years since Córdoba have been in the top flight and played against Barça. We know the atmosphere we will be facing and that it will be tough."

Córdoba manager, Rafael Berges - Intertoto Cup winner as a player with Celta in 2000 - admitted that the Messi factor was going to be an issue. "I don't know if Barça can be stopped, even if you had a catapult in your bag," an idea Pepe is probably now noting down with the next Clásico clash in mind.

For reasons LLL doesn't quite have the energy to explain, Athletic are lagging behind and are only now playing the second leg of the previous round's clash against Eibar. Meanwhie, Mallorca face Sevilla in a game their boss Joaquín Caparrós really, really needs to win. Luckily for him, the flimsy, floppy Sevilla are the perfect opponents in this situation.

Just to really stretch out the tournament, on Thursday night Betis travel to Las Palmas and Levante host Zaragoza, with the visitors having played on Monday and due to play their next league match on Sunday. Phew!

Who will be sacked next in la Liga?

2012-12-11T12:12:00Z

Having dispensed with the ball-rolling formalities via Espanyol's firing of Mauricio Pochettino and Valencia's dismissal of Mauricio Pellegrini, here’s some more men who could find themselves at a loose end in time for Christmas.

José Luis Oltra – Deportivo
Sacking the man who took Depor up as champions last season might seem fairly futile, but that’s the kind of business la Liga’s presidents specialise in. Deportivo have won just two league games out of 15 and are bottom of the table after the disastrous 6-0 walloping by Atlético Madrid on Sunday. Depor have now conceded 37 – five more than Rayo Vallecano, which is really saying something.
José Luis Oltra isn’t feeling the pressure though. “We’ve reached rock bottom and now there’s only one way to go and that’s up,” insisted the Deportivo boss. Perhaps he knows that with the taxman hanging onto the side’s income, the club might find it financially infeasible firing him and finding a manager who can't bring in any new players – or potentially pay the ones already at the club. Miguel Angel Lotina will probably take the gig for free, though.
LLL odds*: 3-1

Joaquín Caparrós – Mallorca
Much as it pains the blog to write this, the Mallorca manager is in a huge amount of trouble after Sunday’s 4-0 loss to Levante. The defence was a shambles, the attack simply didn’t function, the team have picked up just two points from 30… and to make bad matters even messier, after the Levante match Caparrós had a bickering match – with a football journalist, of all people. Most unbecoming.
However, Caparrós was a little chirpier on Monday, despite having to speak to a group of lawyers at an event. He opined that sometimes “a disaster is the start of success” – a slogan which might also appeal to the Spanish government.
LLL odds: 8-1

Juan Antonio Anquela – Granada
Having only given the former Alcorcón guy the gig last summer, it would be a tough call to sack him as Granada aren't especially performing below expectations: they're third from bottom, if only one point out of the danger zone. It’s an area the club was always going to be this season, so it would be a little silly to ditch the boss before Christmas.
Club president Quique Pina was very supportive of his manager at the weekend after Granada lost 4-0 to Málaga to leave the Andalusians four league games without a goal.
LLL odds: 15-1

José Mourinho – Real Madrid
Let’s face it, a sacking is exactly what the Real Madrid manager seems to want, what with his antics over the past few weeks of publicly picking on the second-team coach, suggesting the Real Madrid youth system has always been rubbish, moaning about referees again, challenging the Santiago Bernabeu fans to boo him and insulting the assistant manager of Atlético Madrid. Oh, and making his team a bit useless as well, by labouring through the Champions League groups and being 11 points behind Barcelona thanks to being unable to deal with the likes of Getafe and Betis.
LLL odds: 50-1

*NB this is not an actual bookmaking offer. You won't catch LLL leaving behind the well-respected, illustrious life of journalism for the penniless ordeal of bookmaking.

Good Day, Bad Day: Miraculous Messi, Fantastic Falcao and Desperate Deportivo

2012-12-10T11:55:00Z

Good Day

Leo Messi
La Liga Loca caught Leo Messi’s record-breaking performance in a bar spattered with Madridistas who were Béticos for 90 minutes, hoping that a knee-knackered Argentinean would either be too injured to play or fail to get into the game which was a dangerous one for the Catalan club, as the second half proved.
It was not to be, with Messi producing tiny gasps of admiration - quickly stifled - with two devastating finishes which took him to 86 goals in a calendar year. “I don’t think we are ever going to see a player like this ever again,” admitted Tito Vilanova on a footballer who still has three more matches to further increase his incredible 2012 tally.

Atlético Madrid
Once again, the Rojiblancos were doubted after back-to-back defeats in la Liga and the Europa League, but once again Atlético prove that the team is a resilient and above-all professional outfit these days, as shown with Sunday’s dismissal of Deportivo.

Diego Costa
Of course, Falcao seems to be dominating the news, having become only the second Atlético Madrid player in history to score five goals in a game, and the first footballer in la Liga to do it since Fernando Morientes in 2001-02, but the Colombian’s admittedly decent performance would not have been possible had Diego Costa not softened Deportivo up with his opener. Sometimes only LLL makes any sense (sigh).

Real Madrid
LLL thought this was going to be another load of dropped points away from home for José Mourinho’s side (although Karanka is being seen more and more these days). Although the prediction was completely wrong, as usual, the vibe was right, with Real Madrid looking very much like particularly energetic headless chickens at Valladolid and resorting to kitchen sink panic when things weren’t working out. The side normally relies on individual performances for its victories rather than team efforts - Cristiano Ronaldo more often than not - but on this occasion it was a Mesut Özil who carried the Real Madrid can with two goals.
On Saturday night, Madrid got away with the win, but have three defeats in eight in la Liga on the road and the only victory that was properly comprehensive in the manner of last year’s form was the 5-0 victory at Mallorca. Sometimes the issue is a lack of intensity from the footballers, but on Saturday it was as if Madrid simply didn’t have a notion of what to do when the whistle went, aside from hoping someone would come up with the goal-scoring goods.

Florentino Pérez
Tomás Guasch writing in Marca, certainly seems to think the Madrid president had a good time during the Valladolid clash, with a pack of attacking players on and midfielders in defence. “Back in the day, he wanted to put Beckham at rightback and Zidane as a sweeper. All the Galacticos together and winning 4-6."

Málaga
A pleasing 4-0 victory against Granada and a getting-the-job-done sort of performance stuffed with admirable efficiency. “We’ve been playing la Liga and the Champions League. We’ve got 25 points now, which is what we had last season after the whole of the first half of the campaign and we’ve still got four matches left,” chirped a chuffed Manuel Pellegrini.

Levante
A devastating, brilliant display from a Levante side that simply doesn’t stop working, working and working. The 4-0 win over Mallorca brought a standing ovation from a home crowd that have seen their side genuinely fighting for a Champions League spot, through to the knock-out stages of the Europa League and still up and running in the Copa del Rey. Time for a bit of a party then? “I’m going to celebrate with a paella and tomorrow we’ll go back to work,” announced Levante boss, Juan Ignacio Martínez.

Getafe
If it hadn’t been for pesky Real Sociedad and their injury time equaliser, Getafe would have picked up all three points for the side’s fourth win in a row and the club’s best ever start in la Primera. All this with still just the single goal from the squad’s strikers in 15 matches. Even Riki on a recall would be a tempting transfer option for the team, these days.

Manucho & Miroslav Djukic
Although Valladolid striker Manucho was on the losing side despite a brace, and his coach saw his team defeated at home in the 3-2 loss to Real Madrid, it was apparently still a good day for the pair, as far as acheiving their pre-set goals was concerned. “It’s a chance to leave our anonymity so people know us, and people say ‘who is Djukic,” announced the Serbian coach before the encounter. “It helps my profile, so I’m known in the world, but I’m not thinking about myself,” noted a happy Valladolid striker thinking about himself and his two goals.

Carlos Martínez
A first Primera goal for the Real Sociedad defender and the first league strike since his March 2008 effort against Racing Ferrol. “It’s true that I had a bad run in front of goal,” admitted Martínez, “but I hoped that one would come some day.”

Ernesto Valverde
An immediate bounce from the arrival of Ernesto Valverde, with Valencia picking up their first la Liga away win of the season with a 1-0 victory at Osasuna. “I haven’t had that much time with them,” admitted the new boss who took over midweek, “a couple of training sessions, a couple of chats, and little else. When you come in the middle of the season, there’s not much you can do.”

Espanyol
If Javier Aguirre says there’s reason to be cheerful following a 2-2 draw that saw his Espanyol team lose the lead lost in the last seconds of the game, then LLL is not going to argue with the great man. Mainly because he’s a bit scary. It was a match where the referee was a tad bored and gave two penalties and sent off José Antonio Reyes just to see the look on the Sevilla man’s face. “We’ve grown as a team and the attitude of the team is irreproachable,” said Espanyol’s new Mexican manager who has lead his team to back-to-back draws. Considerably better than the previous back-to-back defeats.

Bad Day

Sergio Ramos
The Real Madrid defender suspects there’s something fishy going on after having a perfectly good effort ruled out for offside against Valladolid, the same decision that befell Karim Benzema a fortnight ago in the defeat at Betis. “It’s upsetting as it’s a lot of games now that things have gone against us,” complained Ramos.

Sevilla
A last gasp Alvaro Negredo effort prevented another miserable round for Sevilla, who have now picked up just the single league win in seven. Michel the Manager was more irked, though, about the referee who sent off José Antonio Reyes for two yellow cards, the second for taking a free-kick too quickly. “We deserved to win, with ten men my team was praiseworthy,” boasted the Sevilla boss whose seemingly ill-disciplined team have now had five red cards playing 239 minutes against opponents whilst down to ten men.

Marcelo Bielsa
It was back-to-basics stuff for Athletic Bilbao, who sneaked past Celta Vigo 1-0 in San Mamés. It was a barrage of crosses into the Galician box for ninety minutes, so it’s only natural that Fernando Llorente would be left on the bench by Bielsa for the entire game, putting three crucial points at risk.

Andrés Fernández
Roberto Soldado’s second half effort for Valencia saw the Osasuna goalkeeper beaten for the first time in 422 minutes in la Liga.

Mallorca
Desperate stuff from Mallorca, who were without ideas going forward and a shambles at the back, something that really isn’t the hallmark of a Joaquín Caparrós side who are known for solidity and prodigious work rates. “We were bad, really bad,” admitted the Mallorca boss whose team have now picked up just two points from 30, “but we are not dead. When I’m dead, I wake up, but I’m not dead at the moment.” Caparrós clearly showed that he was alive and kicking by then suggesting that a question from a journalist on boardroom issues at Mallorca was complete “drivel”.

Juan Antonio Anquela
The Granada boss should perhaps be in the Good Day section as despite the 4-0 defeat to Málaga that leaves the side in the relegation zone, Anquela is still safe in his job with the Granada president publicly backing his manager. “I have total confidence in him. The second year is the hardest and the players need support and if they have to scream, then they can do it to me.”

Deportivo
The hammering from Atlético Madrid plonks Desperate Depor to the bottom-of-the-table having conceded 37 goals in 15 games and just two league victories. “The situation is difficult but can be saved,” claimed Deportivo manager, José Luis Oltra after the trashing.

La Preview: Insolvent Sevilla, Pellegrini’s revenge and feisty Fernando

2012-12-07T09:27:00Z

FRIDAY

Espanyol (20th) v Sevilla (11th) – 21.30: all kick-offs Spanish local time
Sevilla president José María Del Nido isn’t having the best of times at the moment and it’s probably part of nature’s wonderfully balanced plan to make up for those happy days of Sevilla winning lots of trophies and Del Nido being illegally up to his arm-pits in Marbella cash. No "allegedly" required here, either [Phew - Ed.], with the lawyer being found officially, properly, banged-to-rights guilty of corruption and going through an appeal process to prevent him from serving serious time. “I was convicted unjustly and remain innocent,” declared the Andalusian overlord.

Del Nido’s side followed up a defeat at Atlético with a grim 2-1 loss at home to Valladolid on Monday night to leave the side stuck in 12th, seven points from the Champions League places. And that’s where Sevilla need to be if the team are to get out of their current financial hole, with Del Nido presenting losses for the first time under his leadership at the annual shareholders meeting and announcing that €16m in sales will be required to partly make up for a deficit predicted for the season to come. “We wouldn’t have had our success if we hadn’t spent more than our income allowed,” claimed Del Nido in justifying the iffy state of Sevilla’s accounts.
LLL Prediction – Draw

SATURDAY

Real Sociedad (9th) v Getafe (6th) – 16.00
Oh no! Champions League chasing Getafe are starting to make some enemies in the world! The club’s website this week was hacked with a barely legible rudey-rude missive posted which had the following message under the club’s crest – all sic, by the way. “**** premier league spanish. No time to bull****s...i am got to attak more site’s! HAhahahahah:P. Algeria and morocco.”

LLL suspects that a still-aggrieved Dani Güiza may have a lot of time on his hands out in Malaysia and has taken a Website Design For Beginners course.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Málaga (5th) v Granada (18th) – 18.00
Revenge! Rain on your wedding day! Not that the very lovely, smooth and sophisticated Manuel Pellegrini is in to that kind of thing. But there’s a certain twist to Saturday’s clash between Málaga and Granada. LLL readers may well remember a certain Copa del Rey defeat to Alcorcón in 2009 spelling the beginning of the end for Pellegrini at Real Madrid.

The manager of the Madrid minnows at that time was Juan Antonio Anquela. The same gentleman is now the coach of Granada, and potentially one defeat away from the chop with Granada third from bottom and managing just the single win in seven. “I’ve been waiting three years for this, bee-atch” is something that Pellegrini probably isn’t going to be saying as the pair meet on the touchline ahead of Saturday’s clash.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valladolid (7th) v Real Madrid (3rd) – 20.00
Mourinho got his Portuguese booty owned during the team’s victory against Atlético Madrid last Saturday. During the match, LLL spotted an altercation between the Real Madrid bench and former loon-bag Rojiblanco goalkeeper turned Diego Simeone assistant Germán ‘Mono’ Burgos. According to El Mundo, an irate Burgos was reminding Mourinho that he wasn’t Tito Vilanova and he would cheerfully “rip his head off” if push came to shove. Or poke.

Quite naturally, the Portuguese was asked about the incident ahead of the Ajax clash and riffed on his ‘Pito Vilanova’ routine from last season by asking “who is Mono Burgos?” As is the way of the world in the Spanish press, Atlético Madrid president Enrique Cerezo was then asked for his response to the Madrid’s man’s response and kept the rift going and inviting a tit-for-tat war of nonsense.

“Who is Mourinho, is he the president of Celta?” joshed the Rojiblanco ruler. For the record, the president of Celta Vigo is Carlos Mouriño, making Cerezo’s gag even more side-splitting but probably fairly insulting at a certain Galician club.
LLL Prediction – Draw (repeat, "draw"!)

Osasuna (16th) v Valencia (12th) – 22.00
Rather than appointing Ernesto Valverde as manager until the end of the season, Valencia president Manuel Llorente should simply have handed the team’s delegate Salvador González Marco the coach’s role after ‘Voro’ took over the bench duties for Valencia’s 1-0 win at Lille in the Champions League.

The former Valencia player was taking over the side for the second time, having temporarily taken the role in 2008 for five games after Ronald Koeman left Mestalla. Voro’s six matches in charge have brought about five wins for Valencia, which has LLL thinking that the answer to the club’s problems is very close to home.
LLL Prediction – Draw

SUNDAY

Levante (8th) v Mallorca (17th) – 12.00
It’s Levante, so time for Europa League update, dum-de-dum. And the good news is that the Valencia club will still form part of it next year. Although Levante had already qualified for the knock-out rounds, the plucky battlers had the chance to come top of their group, for what it’s worth, but could only get a draw against Hannover which wasn’t quite enough.

Atlético also ended up in second after defeat at Viktoria Plzen, whilst Athletic Bilbao played out the final European match ever, ever, ever at San Mamés with the club set to move into a brand new home next year. Sadly it was the deadest of dead rubbers, a goalless draw against Sparta Prague in which Fernando Llorente was booed. Which brings us neatly onto the next match.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Athletic Bilbao (15th) v Celta Vigo (14th) – 17.00
Fernando Llorente spoke out this week. Let’s face it, the Athletic striker isn’t particularly having a fun time of it in the Basque-lands after being pretty much being ostracised by Marcelo Bielsa for daring to want to leave the club. “I’m off on the 30th June,” announced Llorente. “I want to try different things. I’ve been European and World Champion. I’ve been playing well for a few years now.”

At the striker’s first formal press conference of the year, Llorente also had a pop at those sat before him for stirring the pot of controversy somewhat. “Most stories about meetings with other clubs have been lies and have helped set people against me.”

Juve are back in the frame as a possible destination, with the Italian club perhaps wanting to reinforce over the winter for the next Champions League phase, but Marcelo Bielsa says not a chance. “His departure in January has been rejected and it’s a fixed position and his presence is necessary,” declared the Athletic boss.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Deportivo (19th) – 19.00
Fighting talk from Deportivo midfielder Abel Aguilar ahead of Sunday’s whopper of a clash against Atlético, which could leave Depor rock bottom. “We can’t go to the Calderón thinking that if lose it doesn’t matter because the rival is a big team. We’re in a situation that we can’t think that way. We have to go there to win." So that's alright then.

Depor old-timer Juan Carlos Valerón was also in chipper mood claiming that his team are a bit down but not out. “The team has something, it’s not that we don’t know how to play or that we are disaster.” He also had lovely words for manager José Luis Oltra: “I think he has unlimited credit.” Deportivo’s wonderfully-named big boss Augusto César Lendoiro may disagree.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Betis (4th) v Barcelona (1st) – 21.00
Tito Vilanova has learned another fun side of being a football manager – having to deal with a 20-20 vision, wiser-after-the-event football press. With a fairly weakened Barcelona goalless against Benfica and needing a bit of a boost, the Barça boss brought on Leo Messi with half-an-hour to go. Unfortunately, the striker had a a clash with Benfica goalkeeper Arturo, and had to be stretchered off with a knee injury that wasn’t too serious in the end but saw a few Camp Nou bowels emptying in fear.

So of course, Vilanova was asked "Why risk Messi?", despite the fact that the same injury could be suffered in any game, in training or even running for the bus. (Has Messi ever run for a bus? Has any footballer ever run for a bus, besides Ever Banega trying to catch up with the team coach?) “I wouldn’t have done anything differently,” insisted Tito. “If that was the case then I’d change him after 60 minutes in every game in case he got injured.”
LLL Prediction – Away win

MONDAY

Rayo Vallecano (10th) v Zaragoza (13th)
Transfer gossip! Although not as exciting as the Kaká-to-Portman-Road story that LLL has just made up. Atlético are thought to be taking a lazy stretch and yawn during the winter window and making a bid for Rayo forward Leo Baptistao, who has an €8m clause, which is a little higher than the 20p stuck on Michu as price tag.

In order to grease the deal's wheels, the Rojiblancos may offer centre back Jorge Pulido, who had a successful loan spell in Vallecas last season and still can’t get a decent gig at the Vicente Calderón. The deal could be even more likely if Atlético can persuade Arsenal and Arsene Wenger that Adrián is a free-scoring striker.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Marca’s revisionist approach to Müller milestone puts Messi one goal closer to record

2012-12-06T13:00:00Z

Well, that’s certainly one way to get out of a pickle. On Wednesday, LLL brought you the news that Marca in a bit of a sulk had a completely different opinion on when Leo Messi would beat Gerd Müller’s 85 goals in a calendar year record. According to the Madrid-based paper, the Argentinean’s first against Athletic Bilbao was in fact an own-goal, despite the referee’s report stating otherwise.

To be fair, in terms of their annual 'Pichichi' top scorer competition, Marca are entitled to do whatever the blazes they want. Indeed, they gave an extra goal to Cristiano Ronaldo when everyone else registered the strike to Pepe in the 2010-11 season, and certainly not just to give him an extra leg-up against Leo Messi, in the battle to be top scorer. But this particular declaration was going to make things very confusing, with Marca set to report Messi’s potential surpassing of Müller's record at a completely different time to every other media outlet, claiming the forward was two strikes away, instead of the more widely accepted one.

But that’s no longer an issue, thanks to a handy adjustment made by the paper in Thursday’s edition. Instead of moodily correcting their own records for Messi’s tally this season, Marca have now cited a video uncovered by ESPN featuring a game between West Germany and the USSR in June 1972, in which it appears that one of Müller’s four goals was actually an own goal by the Soviet keeper.

This revisionist approach leaves the German on 84 goals, and thusly sees Messi now just one behind - putting Marca on a level footing with the rest of the world. Although in the final paragraph of the paper’s article it does leave a cliff hanger ending on what will ultimately happen. “Anyway, it seem very improbable that FIFA will end up rectifying it, something that they normally never do."

Valencia face a troublesome trip as Marca cause Messi confusion

2012-12-05T11:01:00Z

Valencia’s journey to Lille for Wednesday's Champions League clash probably wasn’t a fun affair for the players. La Liga Loca imagines that their monosyllabic midfielders will have had the volume on their over-sized headphones cranked up to 11, as they gazed glumly at mobile phones wondering whether or not to send that fine-tempting Tweet or hassle their agents for the fifth time that morning.

Eyes were probably searching the aisles of the plane on the look-out to see if the notoriously tardy Ever Banega actually made the flight. Players may have even been pondering who gave Sofiane Feghouli a lift to the airport, given he was recently banned from driving after being unable to produce a valid license when stopped by police. David Albelda would have been patrolling the plane looking for malcontents such as Fernando Gago, who expressed an interested in leaving Mestalla. “If some of my colleagues don’t want to be here, then it’s a good time to go,” warned the Valencia veteran on Monday.

One key figure who definitely isn't making the trip for the final Champions League group game is Ernesto Valverde, the coach swiftly appointed by club president Manuel Llorente in place of Mauricio Pellegrino, the coach swiftly fired by Manuel Llorente. The former Villarreal and Espanyol manager is only set to be hanging about Mestalla until the summer on a six month contract.

“That’s all they offered me,” revealed a figure thought to be moving into San Mamés next season. Valverde will be staying behind in Valencia removing dart boards and pool tables from the training centre after suggesting that “there are a lot of elements around which don’t allow you to focus on what’s important, which is football and that’s what makes us stronger.”

Game for a laugh: Voro will take charge of Valencia for one match

Instead, stand-in stand-in manager Salvador ‘Voro’ González will be leading the line in Lille, in a match that could see Valencia top of their Champions League group, should they get a better result than Bayern can muster against BATE.

Real Madrid will certainly be wishing their compatriots luck, but only so they don’t run the risk of facing the Germans in the last 16, with José Mourinho’s team finishing in second place behind Borussia Dortmund in their own group. A fairly strong side was fielded in the two-thirds full Santiago Bernabeu, and put Ajax to the sword 4-1.

Mourinho’s once again decided to fire pot shots at the youth team coach, Alberto Toril, by giving midfielder José Rodríguez 20 minutes, making the him the youngest player to feature for Madrid in the Champions League at 17 years and 354 days, beating Raúl’s record of 18 years and 78 days. “He’s another kid that I really like. It’s a shame that he’s not starting for Castilla. But we like him anyway.”

Málaga’s home clash with Anderlecht was also a dead rubber, with prize money the only thing at stake. But Málaga couldn't pocket it all, losing half a million by conceding an equaliser in the final seconds. “I don’t care who we play in the next round,” said Manuel Pellegrini after the clash, “the most important thing is that we go into it in good form.”

Barcelona are the last of the final four to play in matches that have significance elsewhere, but not in Spain. In this particular case, it’s in Scotland where the Wee Hoopie Ones of Glasgow will be hoping the Catalan club beat Benfica in the Camp Nou, which would mean a point in their own fixture, at home to Spartak, would see the progress.

The Barça side should be reasonably strong, but certainly not full in 100% va-va-voom mode. Leo Messi is set to start, just one goal away from equalling Gerd Muller’s 85 in a calendar year (see FourFourTwo's snazzy infographic here), even if Marca are trying to muddy the water by saying Messi is in fact two goals short, refusing to give his ‘first’ against Athletic Bilbao on Saturday, instead awarding it as an own goal to Fernando Amorebieta.

Thursday morning’s headlines may proclaim a record-breaking night for Leo Messi, depending on how the forward does against Benfica. But in some areas, the big news announcement will have to wait. Spain really is different.

Good Day, Bad Day: Messi’s missing goal, Mestalla mayhem & obstinate Osasuna

2012-12-03T11:51:00Z

RESULTS Sat 1 Dec Getafe 1-0 Malaga, Valencia 2-5 Real Sociedad, Barcelona 5-1 Athletic Bilbao, Real Madrid 2-0 Atletico Madrid Sun 2 Dec Granada 0-0 Espanyol, Deportivo 2-3 Real Betis, Celta Vigo 1-1 Levante, Mallorca 1-1 Real Zaragoza.

Good Day

Barcelona
Barcelona's start to the league season - 13 wins and a draw - is now the best in the Spanish League ever, ever, ever - beating Real Madrid’s run from 1991-92. But the peculiar thing is that it doesn’t feel like an earth-shattering event, simply because Barça have been so consistently spectacular over the past few years. Then there’s the fact the side have made the current campaign look so easy, even managing to pick up wins without playing with any proper defenders on the pitch for a number of games.
Tito Vilanova didn’t seem particularly fussed about the milestone, and was chirpier about the 5-1 panning of Athletic Bilbao which secured it. “I’m very happy about having achieved this record, but more so for the performance of the players,” said the Barça boss.
Praise also came from Marcelo Bielsa, the coach that may well have been sitting in Tito’s seat if Barça weren’t so fond of choosing number twos. The Athletic boss claimed that there was no real change from the days of Pep Guardiola. “They have the same power, the same style, the same sensation of constant danger with any type of ball in any area of the pitch,” admired Bielsa.

Leo Messi
Two more goals (that’s four braces in a row in la Liga now) puts the Argentinean genius just one strike away from equalling Gerd Müller’s record of 85 in a calendar year. However, Marca are making things a little confusing by chalking up Barça’s second strike as an own goal, thus leaving Messi on 'just' 20 goals so far this season in their Pichichi charts, although they do recognise the referee’s awarding of the effort to the Argentinean. That’s not going to get complicated at all...

Cristiano Ronaldo
The poor fella doesn’t seem quite himself these days, but Ronaldo was the only one who turned up for work at the Santiago Bernabeu with a rare set-piece strike, an assist and efforts against the bar and post. More than everyone else on the pitch put together, in fact. Ronaldo has now scored eight goals against Atlético in eight games.

José Mourinho
The Real Madrid manager promised he would be on the pitch at 9.20 at the Santiago Bernabeu giving the chance for anyone in the stadium to boo or cheer him. And there he was, milking the noise for a couple of minutes. Whoever is writing Mourinho’s plot-lines and material these days is very good indeed - not even LLL could do it better. Real Madrid is more soap opera than football club these days.

Joel Campbell
An absolute beauty of a winner from the on-loan Arsenal striker gave Betis the three points and ended a tremendous week which delivered three wins to put the side into the next round of the Copa and moved Betis into the Champions League places.

Luis García
A fortieth birthday present for the Getafe manager from defender, Lopo, who gave his side a 1-0 win over Málaga to make it three victories in a row for the Madrid team. Perhaps the others gave him some underwear and aftershave instead. Anyway, heady days indeed at the Coliseum where the dozens of fans in attendance at the games will be pinching themselves in excitement, as opposed to staying awake. “It costs the earth to win every game,” admitted García whose strikers fired blanks for the 15th time in 16 games.

Levante
A handy point away from home at Celta keeps things ticking over for the only functioning club in the city of Valencia these days.

Philippe Montanier
Perhaps what really riled the Valencia fans in their whopper of a defeat to Montanier's Real Sociedad was the fact the Basque side is usually a fairly unassuming, polite outfit who don’t tend to turn teams over. La Real have now won three from four to put the team into eighth. Still not enough for the fans and large chunks of the local media, who will probably permanently have it in for the French boss.

Alberto de la Bella
What a shimmy and a dummy from the Real Sociedad full-back for his side’s first of five. Ooh. Suits you.

Roberto
Here’s a open question to ponder, and one a few people LLL has spoken to in Spain answer with a 'yes'. Is the Zaragoza No.1 the best Spanish keeper at the moment?

Osasuna
The Pamplona’s club ‘you shall not pass’ Gandalf-style vibe is starting to bear fruit. Osasuna have now gone four league games and a cup victory without conceding a single goal. Nada. Nichts. Nothing.
Friday’s night shut-out of Rayo Vallecano and a sneaky goal at the other end means LLL must extend a pat on the back to the club for holding their nerve and keeping faith with José Luis Mendilibar. Osasuna rode their luck a little bit against Rayo who probably deserved a point with the home side boss admitting that the clash was “the most difficult match of the season by some way.”

Unai Emery
Ok, so it probably wasn't the best week for Mauricio Pellegrino’s predecessor at Valencia, what with Emery losing his job at Spartak, but the crouching one will probably still enjoy the enormous discomfort being suffered by his old bosses in Mestalla after the 5-2 defeat to Sociedad.

La Liga Loca
The beginning of the season saw all sorts of confusion for the blog, with Mauricio/Manuel Pochettino/Pellegrino/Pellegrini at the helm of Espanyol, Valencia and Málaga. Not any more. The double firing of two of that trio this week saw life become an awful lot easier, with just the Málaga man left standing.

Bad Day

Atlético Madrid
Losing against Real Madrid isn’t an unusual occurrence for Atlético, after all, the side have now failed to beat their neighbours 24 times in a row over the past 13 years and one month. But what was really disappointing was that this time, this time, this time, there was the feeling that the Rojiblancos were really going to make the derby a contest, with the side in confident form and eight points above Real Madrid in the table. But once again, Atlético failed to turn up, and made this one of the worse contests of recent years, and one that the blog would like to purge from its memory as soon as possible.

Málaga
After a bit of a happy bump against Valencia last week, when Málaga came out 4-0 winners, the more familiar form returned with a defeat at Getafe, leaving them with just a single victory in six league games. “We have the squad that we have and with it, we can go for everything,” said Manuel Pellegrini both chippy and chipper to suggestions that reinforcements may be needed in the winter to make sure Málaga have enough juice in the tank to last till May.

Mauricio Pellegrino
LLL is not sure that Mauricio Pellegrino was the right choice for the Valencia job in the first place - it needs a gentleman with skin made of teflon and a heart of stone to manage the club, and the fans who didn’t know when they had a good thing in Unai Emery. However, the former Mestalla player deserved more time at the helm than the 154 days that he got, despite the evident problems the side was having.
Valencia president, Manuel Llorente, denies making a rash decision a short time after the Mestalla massive were calling for his own resignation, rather than that of the manager, but it does feel like a self-serving sacrifice. “I think the decision is unfair,” said Pellegrino on Sunday with the former boss being applauded by a group of fans who had come to the training centre. “We were four or five points from our objective in la Liga, through in the Champions League and alive in the Cup.”
It’s going to be hard rooting for Valencia for the rest of the season, whose leadership are such that they even make the trigger-happy pair running the third-place chasing Atlético Madrid appear faintly likable.

Athletic Bilbao
Decent for about 15 minutes against Barcelona but ended up conceding five for the third time in la Liga this season.

Mallorca
Bit of a weird match for Mallorca who were up against a 10 man Zaragoza for 77 minutes but still couldn’t win, making it nine matches without a victory. It was almost a very bad day for Mallorca striker, Víctor, who insisted on taking a first half penalty but proceeded to miss it, but scored a late equaliser in a 1-1 draw. “The effort of my players was 100%, they gave everything and this is the path we need to follow,” announced a positive Joaquín Caparrós.

Juan Antonio Anquela
A home match against a rattled Espanyol with a new coach was as good a chance of any to pick up a only the side’s second win in eight. Instead it was a goalless draw with the Granada boss the favourite to be the next sacking in la Primera now that the floodgates have opened.

Deportivo
A challenging campaign continues with Deportivo slipping to second-from-bottom after a 2-3 home defeat by Betis. Just one victory in 13 games now for the Galician side. “I’m still feeling good and feel safe in my job,” said Depor boss José Luis Oltra after the defeat.

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La Preview: A call for calm in Madrid, Espanyol against the clock & Messi’s big match ban

2012-11-30T10:44:00Z

Friday

Osasuna (19th) v Rayo Vallecano (8th) - 21.00 (all kick-offs local time)
There’s been Spanish football in either league or cup form from last Friday through to Thursday, so why not continue this Spanish saturation of soccer by kicking round 14 off on Friday night at nine in Pamplona, where LLL’s weather research suggests it will be around -2?
Differing Copa del Rey fortunes during the week for the two clubs going into the teeth-chattering clash. Osasuna ended a thrilling run of back-to-back draws by beating second division Sporting 2-0 to set up a double-headed tie with Valencia, while Rayo failed to score against Las Palmas in two legs to see the Madrid side knocked out of the cup, which will probably do their small squad some good in the long run.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Saturday

Getafe (7th) v Málaga (4th) - 16.00
IOC delegates should have been handing out medals for the hardy, or very bored Getafe fans who turned up for their Wednesday cup clash against Ponferradina, a match where the Coliseum club held a 4-0 lead from the first leg. A total of 3,000 medals would have been needed for the plucky souls who witnessed a goalless draw, with Getafe’s strikers failing to find the net once again, making it one goal in 15 matches from anyone who has forward as their job title in their passport (if they still do that kind of thing). “We’re sorry for not having won the game for the people who turned up in the cold,” was the apology from Luis García.
Meanwhile, Málaga are taking advantage of the road trip to the outskirts of the Spanish capital to change the club’s atrocious pitch. LLL is not sure if they have the cash themselves to make the change or if they will be seeking seed funding.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Valencia (11th) v Real Sociedad (12th) - 18.00
One league defeat in five...comfortable mid-table spot...three points from the European places. Of course la Real fans booed manager Philippe Montanier after the side’s cup exit to Córdoba - one which spared them being thrashed twice by Barcelona in the next round - because that what the supporters have been doing since the arrival of the Frenchman for no good reason other than their aesthetic snootiness.
Valencia shouldn’t have any problems in Saturday’s game, as it is being played at the Mestalla, where only two points have been dropped in six league matches, a slightly improved record to the home one which reads just two points won in seven.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Athletic Bilbao (14th) - 20.00
Wednesday saw Athletic playing perhaps their most pointless match in their history, with the visit to Israel to face Hapoel Kiryat Shmona in the team’s rearranged fifth round Europa League clash. The Basque side had already been eliminated from the group irrespective of the result of the game, which happened to be a 2-0 win for Athletic, with Fernando Llorente both starting and scoring. Only seven first-teamers made the trip which is probably why Athletic came out on top.
Barça were in action on the same night, seeing off Alavés in their Copa del Rey tie infront of some 57,000. This sizable attendance was thanks to the admirable initiative to give away over 40,000 tickets to local organisations, such as schools, hospitals and senior citizen centres. Don’t you just hate Barça sometimes for making themselves so easy to love?
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (3rd) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 22.00
Without too much to talk about on the pitch during Real Madrid’s perfunctory 3-0 win over Alcoyano, most chatter in the Madridista world was over the state of José Mourinho’s popularity at the Santiago Bernabeu stands, after last weekend’s defeat to Betis left the club 11 points behind Barça. Much was made of some of those at the game jeering the Ultras for singing Mourinho’s name - that happens at pretty much every match - as well as the Ultras themselves chanting that “only you defend the club,” in a barb towards Florentino Pérez. It was all a bit to much for poor Tomás Roncero of AS, who wants to see one big, happy family for Saturday’s derby. “The fans should unite and forget this civil war that’s doing so much,” was the plea from the columnist.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Granada (18th) v Espanyol (20th) - 12.00
New Espanyol coach, Javier Aguirre, got an early taste of the stale food on his football plate on Wednesday, when he watched his players lose 3-0 at home to Sevilla in Cornella, a result which sent the side crashing out of the cup in the first round. The Mexican manager, now at the helm of his fourth la Liga side, spoke the afternoon after the night before - this is Spain of course, nothing happens in the morning - and announced the necessity of 'picking up points over the next 25 matches'.
“We are against the clock here and have to do what we can with the time that’s left,” said Aguirre cheerfully setting the club’s supporters up for relegation by the sounds of it.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Deportivo (17th) v Betis (5th) - 17.00
It’s time for another heart-warming story. And LLL certainly won’t be getting it at Deportivo at the moment. Instead, it’s over to Betis who continued a fine week with a 3-0 win in the Copa del Rey against Valladolid. However, the best part of the night was the return to action of Alvaro Vadillo, the 18-year-old great hope for the future of the club who has been out of action for just over a year after tearing his cruciate ligament. The young attacker came on with half an hour left and set up two goals, to show that he was back in business for Betis. “You don’t know which side he’s going to take or how to approach him,” said admiring Betis defender, Antonio Amaya. “At the moment there are few players in la Primera that can stop him.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Celta Vigo (15th) v Levante (6th) - 19.00
Back on the Monday night doom-zone, when la Liga’s cursed are forced to play their matches, Celta Vigo picked up their first away points of the season with a 1-0 win at Zaragoza. It was another match where local hero, Iago Aspas, came up trumps scoring his sixth goal of the league campaign to begin talk of a move in the winter window, quite possibly to Swansea, write Marca.
However, the forward has a contract to 2017, a year so far in the future we’ll all have jet packs, and is in possession of a clause of €10m. “At the moment, I imagine that Iago will be on the list for a lot of sporting directors because he’s doing very well,” said Celta’s very own Sporting Director, Miguel Torrecilla. “If his performance keeps on developing as it is now, the speculation will increase but we don’t know how far this kid will go.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mallorca (16th) v Zaragoza (13th) - 21.00
‘The fixture lists are insane’ complaint number 29,449 comes from Zaragoza boss, Manolo Jiménez, who is unhappy about playing on Monday night, then on Thursday in the cup and then on Sunday again, although to be fair Sunday’s opponents were also on Thursday night action too in the cup and squeezed through to the next round, as did Zaragoza. “Whoever sets the timetable hasn’t even played Parchís,” fumed Jiménez.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Sevilla (10th) v Valladolid (9th) - 21.30
It’s on bended knee and tugged forelock that LLL thanks AS for the best story of the week that a Valladolid fan who bought a ticket for the visit of Barcelona just before Christmas, also tried to buy one for his dog called ‘Messi’. Sadly, Messi was turned away back into the cold and will miss the big match against Barça.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Pochettino sacked as unpredictable Aguirre returns to Spain with Espanyol

2012-11-28T13:52:00Z

Mauricio Pochettino arrived to save Espanyol halfway through the 2008-09 season as a bearded cheeky chubster, clad permanently in the tracksuit of the team for whom he had played for eight seasons in the 1990s. Just under four years later, the poor Perico has been kicked out of Cornella, considerably slimmer, sadder and certainly a lot more stressed than before.

In taking this unfortunate action on Monday, Espanyol - bottom of the table after a home defeat to Getafe - had removed the longest serving manager at a Primera League team. This leaves Pepe Mel at Betis, Celta Vigo’s Paco Herrera and - you are never going to believe this - Real Madrid's José Mourinho as the new veterans, with all three embarking on their third seasons in charge of their teams.

In the Argentinean’s farewell address, Pochettino urged the players to show the same fighting spirit displayed that just over three years ago had lifted Espanyol out of a relegation struggle, but lamented the fact he wouldn’t be there to lead the way once again. “I’m going home to be with my family and we’ll see what happens. For now I’m going to rest and think.”

Jose celebrates pinching Mauricio's record...probably...

However, it’s going to be a tall order for the Cornella club, who can be considered decent on paper but uninterested on grass. Although Pochettino was quick to remind everyone that there is quality in the squad, there’s a distinct lack of commitment and leadership in the dressing room, with the old war horses of days gone by - think Ivan de la Peña, Raúl Tamudo and Luis García - all absent, with nobody in the current generation stepping forward to replace them.

Although the sacking saw LLL waving a fond farewell to Pochettino, the blog leapt up and down in glee at the return of Javier Aguirre, last seen in la Liga clearing his desk having been sacked by Real Zaragoza just after Christmas last season. The wonderfully unpredictable former Osasuna and Atlético Madrid coach is set to be unveiled by Espanyol on Thursday, with the club taking some time to choose between himself and Marcelino, another manager who found himself being fired last year, but by Sevilla.

And it’s Sevilla who are Espanyol’s opponents in the Copa del Rey on Wednesday night in the second leg of their last 32 tie, with a 3-1 advantage from the first leg not even the hapless Andalusians can blow. Or maybe they can. “ I don’t know why, but when we play away the team doesn’t have this ambition, this responsibility it has at home,” complained Míchel the Manager.

Six cup games were resolved on Tuesday night. The main casualties from the action were Real Sociedad, who were held to a 2-2 home draw by Córdoba, losing 4-2 on aggregate. “It was a big disappointment as we had plans to do well in the cup,” snuffled la Real boss, Philippe Montanier.

Rayo were also knocked out by lower league opponents, with Las Palmas having the better of things over two legs, but it’s unlikely that anyone at the Vallecas club will care one iota. Málaga squeezed through against third-tier Cacereño on away goals, despite losing the second leg at home 1-0. The two other sides to progress were Real Madrid and Betis, who enjoyed comfy wins against Alcoyano and Valladolid respectively.

Good Day, Bad Day: Mourinho’s moans, a Brilliant Betis and invisible Valencia

2012-11-26T11:06:00Z

RESULTS Fri 23 Nov Real Sociedad 0-0 Osasuna Sat 24 Nov Real Betis 1-0 Real Madrid, Malaga 4-0 Valencia, Real Valladolid 1-0 Getafe, Rayo Vallecano 2-0 Mallorca Sun 25 Nov Levante 0-4 Barcelona, Atletico Madrid 4-0 Sevilla, Athletic Bilbao 1-1 Deportivo, Espanyol 0-2 Getafe

Good Day

Barcelona
LLL doesn't want to contribute to the smug cloud which has appeared over Cataluyna after Barcelona's beat Levante 4-0 - with eleven La Masia men on the pitch at one point - a victory that gives Barça an 11 point lead over Real Madrid. So, we'll jump into the Atlético Madrid camp and remind you what Tito Vilanova pointed out after the game. “The league isn’t over, Atlético are just three points away,” noted the Barça boss.

Atlético Madrid
Not too much to say except another professional, 'job-done' performance in the Vicente Calderón saw Sevilla humbled 4-0. The big debate this week will be whether Atlético can finally beat Real Madrid in the derby on Saturday, but the feeling from the Rojiblanco camp - who are in possession of an eight point lead over their rivals - could well be “don’t really care!” It’s Atlético who are the new sheriffs in town in Spain’s capital city.

Málaga
Finally, a bit of the old swagger returned to Málaga, just when the team needed it. Their 4-0 whipping of Valencia may have included three late goals, but the Andalusians were in control from the off, ending a run of four league games without a victory. “I’m feeling much better now that we’re back to being the team we were before,” smiled wrinkly Manuel Pellegrini.

Pepe Mel
Betis are a wonderfully unpredictable side just as likely to concede four or five one week as grind out a tight win with a clean sheet the next. It was the former in the calamitous loss to Sevilla last week, and the latter on Saturday, with a fantastically disciplined Betis - without three normal starters in the back four - ensuring they were first to pretty much every ball against Real Madrid.
Pepe Mel was a touch concerned what the reception would be for his Betis players for the visit of the league champions due to last week’s hapless derby battering, but it turned out to be a tremendous one from the home crowd, with everything forgiven at the beginning of the match and all forgotten by the end.

Pedro León
The forgotten man of Getafe, never mind the forgotten man of Spanish football. Allowed all the time in the world to score his side’s first in a 2-0 win over Espanyol that sees the Coliseum club on the fringes of the European places. But don’t tell Luis García, that. “Every time we talk about Europe, we lose the plot,” admitted the Getafe coach.

Leo Baptistao
Nineteen points! 19! Just under half of what Rayo need to stay up and it’s not even December. And Rayo aren’t that good. Then again, that was similar to the story last season and a disastrous slump towards the end of the campaign nearly took the team into the second division. When Rayo play well and win it’s because their 20-year-old Brazilian forward, Leo Baptistao plays well. The second best Leo in la Liga scored Rayo’s first of the game and his sixth of the season, then set up his team’s second with a crafty piece of trickery to give Rayo a 2-0 win over visiting Mallorca.

Valladolid
LLL suspects that Valladolid are going to go about their business this season without anyone really noticing that they are there. A bit like Stoke. That’s not really their fault, it’s just that Miroslav Dukic’s side are a simple no-nonsense, get-the-job-done outfit without too many dramas going on. Matches tend to be won by the minimum margin - Saturday’s 1-0 victory over Granada is a typical example - but then again Valladolid rarely ship too many, with the side never conceding more than the two goals in any match.

Fernando Llorente
A first start in la Liga for the big fella and it was nearly celebrated with a first-half goal. However, it wasn’t to be with Athletic drawing 1-1 at home to Deportivo. “My sensation is of impotency,” revealed the ever frank, Marcelo Bielsa.

Osasuna
If you can’t score goals, then it makes total footballing sense to not concede them. That’s the crazy plan for the Pamplona side who have only scored 11 goals in their 13 league games this season, but who now haven’t conceded in their last three league games. The problem is that the northern side haven’t scored in the past two either, with Friday’s goalless draw with Real Sociedad being the team’s second in a row. Still, baby steps and all that.

Bad Day

José Mourinho
And it all started so well for the Real Madrid boss on Saturday, with Mourinho beginning his post-match meanderings by congratulating the Betis players and fans. Excellent. Important to be a good loser and as well as a good winner and all that.
Of course, that didn’t last long. The defeat was also due to the referee, a lack of will from his tired players and, most ludicrously of all, the fixture calendar, which saw Madrid playing on Wednesday then Saturday, with Barcelona playing on Tuesday then Sunday. Absolute poppy-cork, and something Mourinho failed to bring up when it occurred in the opposite direction during round five of la Liga...when Real Madrid won, by pure coincidence.
The problem with Madrid is that this season, they aren’t managing to pick up wins when they are not playing so well, something the side were able to do last year when winning the title, pure and simple. The results against Getafe and now Betis reflect this. Two games where the performance levels were similar but brought about wins in the last campaign, but defeats this year.
In this weekend’s clash in Seville, Real Madrid took far too long to match the intensity and passion of Betis, but did deserve at least a point with a goal for Karim Benzema ruled offside incorrectly. But these things work for and against your team, and Mourinho knows this and should stop whining and perhaps look at what can be done in the dressing room and the training sessions to give his players some new ideas and perhaps a new attitude. When Mourinho claims that he knows he’s responsible, LLL doesn’t quite believe him.

Sevilla
And so Sevilla’s remarkable run of form (one single win) comes to an end. There were five scored last weekend and four conceded this time around against Atlético Madrid. It’s true that Sevilla were down to ten men after 22 minutes, but the visitors to a perky Vicente Calderón were barely in the game before that point and even less so afterwards. Once again, the conundrum at Sevilla is why can’t they play as they did against Madrid, Barcelona and Betis every week. If Míchel’s hair wasn’t so wonderful and luxuriant, the Sevilla boss would have pulled it all out now trying to solve that particular puzzle.

Valencia
Absolutely horrendous stuff from Valencia, who barely turned up against Málaga on Saturday and were deservedly stuffed 4-0. The defence was lackluster, midfielder sluggish and the attack pretty much non-existent with just the single shot on target. The side continue their dreadful run of form away from Mestalla with five defeats and two draws in their seven league outings so far this season. “We had a horrible game,” fumed Mauricio Pellegrino, “I felt very surprised and responsible.

Joaquín Caparrós
A run of seven defeats and a draw means sees the Mallorca manager under a fair amount of pressure. “We have to have more conviction than ever and we have to believe in ourselves more,” declared Caparrós after the 2-0 defeat at Rayo.

Deportivo
A handy point away from home at Athletic lifts Depor out of the relegation zone. Still not very good though, but can’t have everything.

Granada
Still a strong favourite to end up bottom of the table, unless Osasuna and Espanyol fail to pull their socks up by the end of the season. The away defeat at Valladolid continues a run that sees just one win and five defeats. Not a bad side by any means, but there are about 19 stronger this season.

Mauricio Pochettino
By the time this cheeky segment is published and read, the Espanyol boss could be done and dusted at Espanyol after three years due to a limp, insipid home defeat to Getafe early on Sunday afternoon. No matter what stability and financial problems the club is suffering from off the field, there really was no excuse for the complete lack of effort from the Perico players that let the less than formidable Getafe footballers attack at will and pretty much put their muddy feet up on Espanyol’s couch for 90 minutes. “When you fall into a spiral like this it’s very hard,” admitted the Argentinean manager.

La Preview: Betis barracked, Levante live on, Pericos pick a president, Littlest Hobo eyes the door

2012-11-23T12:32:00Z

Hot off the keyboard from our man in Madrid Tim Stannard, the preview of the four-day weekend's action in la Liga...

FRIDAY

Real Sociedad (9th) v Osasuna (19th) - 21.30 (all Spanish local time)
And so the new-look four day La Liga marathon begins, with those running the show realising that the only way to have every single match as a stand-alone event is to stick games on a Friday night as well as a Monday. The LFP and TV companies have stuck Real Sociedad on the roster to go first, ensuring that some 20,000 or so folk will be absent from San Sebastian bars on Friday in these tough financial times.

The decision is further indication that la Real must have upset someone, somewhere: they were in action on the Monday night just gone in a 4-0 win over Rayo Vallecano and now face Osasuna, who have had 50% longer to rest, having played last Saturday. Good going!
LLL Prediction - Home win

SATURDAY

Rayo Vallecano (11th) v Mallorca (15th) - 16.00
Joaquín Caparrós is a cunning old goat. The Mallorca manager reduced the size of the club's Son Bibiloni training pitch this week in preparation for this clash at Rayo’s teeny-tiny home, even if the official pitch dimensions don't seem that different with Mallorca’s ground just five metres longer and 2.5 metres wider than Rayo's. “The boss was right to shorten the pitch,” affirmed defender Pedro Bigas. “Now we should know how to play in these types of grounds. What’s more the the three points against Rayo are obligatory.”

The big news in the Rayo world is the club’s new stadium security upgrade, which involves something called ‘cameras’. Still no word at all on who cut the cables ahead of the Real Madrid visit, though. “The police still haven’t told us anything,” said Rayo president Raúl Martín.
LLL Prediction - Draw

ARCHIVE, Mon 26 Sep: Hopeless and brilliant: Rayo v Real, the best worst game of the year

Valladolid (12th) v Granada (17th) - 18.00
Not to rest on their laurels - although LLL isn't sure Valladolid have any - one of the coldest clubs in Spain during the country’s chillier months have ensured that their new signing will be able to cope when he arrives during the winter window. Daniel Larsson is a full-blooded Swede, from the country where there’s no such thing as bad weather, but bad clothes.

The 25-year-old international striker is joining from Malmö on a free transfer and knows what to expect, having chatted to countryman and former Valladolid man Henok Goitum, who only had “good things” to say about the club and city.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (5th) v Valencia (8th) - 20.00
Ahem. Now LLL isn’t suggesting that there’s a pattern here, except it probably is, but since the news came through of no payment for the Málaga players, the league form has been two losses at a home and a draw at Osasuna. However, Málaga have continued to go great guns in the Champions League, remaining unbeaten in five after a 2-2 draw with Zenit on Tuesday.

It’s almost as if they're trying to make a point to the owner in la Liga while giving it their all in Europe, what with the sexy shop-window nature of the tournament. Just sayin’. If Málaga fail to beat Valencia, who are quiet hopeless on their travels, then the blog will be fully ready to run the idea up a formal flag-pole and let it flap about to anyone who wants to salute it.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Real Betis (6th) v Real Madrid (3rd) - 22.00
Yes, Betis were somewhat poor in the 5-1 defeat to Sevilla, but the green-and-white brigade are still ahead of their city rivals in the table and have done rather well for much of the campaign. Nevertheless, that’s not enough for some fickle football fans, like those who attended a training session on Tuesday.

The behaviour from 100 or so was feisty enough that club president Miguel Guillén decided a police presence was needed to prevent any potential problems. “They won’t forgive us even if we beat Real Madrid,” admitted the gloomy Betis manager to AS.
LLL Prediction - Away win

SUNDAY

Espanyol (20th) v Getafe (10th) - 12.00
For pessimistic Pericos, Monday brought a new president but zero change. A shareholder election put former No.2 Joan Collet in charge of the club with a 61% majority (although a loser in the popular vote) after the resignation of the previous head, Ramon Condal, at the beginning of October.

But considering Condal and his presidential predecessor Daniel Sánchez Llibre own most of the shares, there's a plus-ça-change feeling at a club who are bottom of the table with debts reported in El País to be at €144m. Such are the bad vibes at Espanyol that Collet was barracked and booed during the whole election process and complained that “what happened today was lamentable but I knew what would go on.” Heavy sigh.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Athletic Bilbao (14th) v Deportivo (18th) - 17.00
More same-old, same-old: off-the-field nonsense with Athletic Bilbao. And at the centre of another kerfuffle, the familiar figure of Fernando Llorente. On Monday, the club communicated that the player had declined the chance to attend a press conference; Llorente countered that he had been told too late and was due to spent some time on local TV, forced to defend himself over a tweeted photo featuring him and Iker Casillas.

“I don’t think I was doing anything wrong, I try to do things the best way I can,” sighed Llorente, who is yet to start in la Liga this season for Athletic. “This year, there’s been a lot of these non-sporting topics. It would be better for us if we could return to normality,” lamented Óscar de Marcos, wishing for the moon with cream on top.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Sevilla (7th) - 19.00
Sevilla president José María del Nido loves a good old boast. After all, this was the gentleman who claimed to be second only to the Pope to the city. Del Nido got a few days to brag after Sevilla's 5-1 demolition of Betis, but quite rightfully, his thoughts then turned to why his players were able to pull out the stops in that particular game or when the world is watching other matches, but barely break into a sweat against the minnows of la Primera.

"I don't know why we can't go out and play all our games like we did against Betis or against Real Madrid and Barcelona. We cannot fail again. We've got to do it," yelled the Sevilla bigwig ahead of the trip to Atlético Madrid.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Levante (4th) v Barcelona (1st) - 21.00
Swoon, swoon, swoon. Another triumph in Europe for the greatest club in the world. Yes, Levante were 3-1 winners at Helsingborg, a result that puts the Spanish side into the next round of the Europa League, with a chance to top the group if they beat Hannover on the final matchday. Oh, and they're in the Champions League places domestically, too. “We are going to fight to be leaders in what is going to be a day of fiesta,” announced a proud Juan Ignacio Martínez.

Atlético Madrid also qualified with a 1-0 win against Hapoel Tel Aviv in front of just 8,000 at the Vicente Calderón, while Athletic Bilbao were eliminated. Although the Basque side’s clash with Hapoel Kiryat was postponed because of the slight issues in Israel at the moment, a draw between Sparta and Lyon bids bye-bye to Marcelo Bielsa’s men in the competition.
LLL Prediction - Away win

MONDAY

Zaragoza (13th) v Celta Vigo (16th)
Celta Vigo are a bit of a strange team this season. They always seem to play OK, but have only won three matches from 12 and are now fifth from bottom, one point above the drop zone. At the helm is former Liverpool trainer Paco Herrera – apparently la Liga's Littlest Hobo, loathe to settle down too long at any club.

Herrera’s contract at Celta runs out at the end of the current campaign and the manager still isn’t sure of what will happen next. “It’s true that I alway get a bit itchy in a seat. Nearly everywhere I’ve been they’ve been wanting me to renew, but I’ve left nearly all of them. I don’t know why,” admitted the Celta boss.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Why Manchester City fans should welcome Ronaldo with open arms

2012-11-21T12:06:00Z

With football fans being football fans, former Manchester United star Cristiano Ronaldo is likely to get an awful lot of hostility from the Etihad crowd, who will have gathered on Wednesday evening hoping their team avoid another bumbling, dismal performance in the Champions League.

However, while the Man City supporters will feel that yelling abuse at the Real Madrid man for 90 minutes would be up there with a night out at the Hacienda in terms of entertainment stakes (LLL hasn't been to Manchester since 1989) it wouldn’t really be a good idea, especially if they want their team to maintain their slim hopes Champions League progression. Rather than greeting Ronaldo with insults and bile, a standing ovation or even a nice cup of tea and a tasty biscuit would be the most productive offering.

One of Ronaldo’s many strengths - along with his lovely race horse thighs and evil stare when his free-kicks balloon over the bar - is that the forward genuinely plays better when there’s thousands of eye-popping, fist-shaking loons on his back for the entire match. Ronaldo’s most impressive league performances last season, for example, were at the Vicente Calderón and in the Camp Nou - two grounds where the supporters hate not just his guts, but the bacteria and enzymes dwelling within them, too.

In the Santiago Bernabeu, Ronaldo can seem a little underwhelmed, although that still doesn’t stop the Portuguese scoring lots of goals. The Madrid man has already knocked in five in this season’s Champions League and Marca see the 27-year-old making a return to Manchester as the key factor in the clash. “God Save Ronaldo,” declares the paper’s preview.

Despite LLL’s warnings to the Man City fans, the paper expects a Galatasaray-style inferno. “The reception will be hostile,” pants Wednesday’s edition, while calling for a big game from a player with a double mission against Man City. “He’ll make the Madrid fans happy and also United’s, who will see their great city rival out of the Champions League at the group stages for yet another year.”

AS are looking at Mourinho to pull out a big one, noting that the Champions League games have not been that hot so far this season. Late goals against City and Dortmund in the Santiago Bernabeu gave Madrid four more points that they side may well have had in an alternate universe. “Today’s the day,” declares Wednesday’s editorial.

While Madrid have gone on their travels with the passage to the knock-out stages still covered in clutter, Málaga have two matches in which they can take a collective chill pill, with just a point needed to secure top spot. Although there’s a chance to win the group in Wednesday's jaunt to Zenit St Petersburg, it's more likely they will adopt a modest approach, with Javier Saviola and Joaquín being left behind, no doubt in preparation for the weekend’s Primera visit of Valencia. That fixture is perhaps more important, given their recent domestic slump, a blip Manuel Pellegrini attributed to “a mixture of fatigue and injuries”.

Spartak Moscow manager, Unai Emery, did what he normally does against Barcelona in Tuesday’s early clash. And that’s fail to beat them. The 3-0 defeat - with two more goals from Leo Messi - was his 15th attempt to get one over the Catalan club. “It’s a continuation of the style Guardiola had,” sighed Unai Emery on Tito’s team, after what was described wearily as “a deserved loss.”

It’s a big hooray for Valencia who got a 1-1 draw in Mestalla against Bayern Munich despite being down to 10 men for 60 minutes after an utterly ludicrous challenge from Antonio Barragán made things tricky for the home side. The former Liverpool defender, who was on the receiving end of red card from Howard Webb, later apologised for his moment of madness via Twitter. “Proud of the team and Mestalla, incredible match from my teammates. I’m so sorry about my sending off.”

The point puts Valencia through to the next round, leaving little old Real Madrid bringing up the rear and hoping for big games from their Portuguese pair against Manchester City in ‘the inferno’ of El Etihad to make it four Spanish teams from four in the knock-out stages of the Champions League.

Unai tries to beat Barça again as Valencia face Bayern battering

2012-11-20T10:22:00Z

As Mauricio Pellegrino looks around at a packed, excited Mestalla on Tuesday night, a stadium packed to the rafters with enthusiastic, loyal fans and watches his feisty Valencia players troop out to take on Bayern Munich, there must be just the one thought going through the Valencia coach’s mind: “blimey, I’m still here.”

LLL has been convinced every weekend the jig was up for Pellegrino – nothing personal and all that – but somehow, Valencia do just enough to keep his barbecue-loving bottom on the bench, despite the side lying in eighth place in la Primera, 13 points off Atlético Madrid, the kind of side the east coast club should be competing with.

Indeed, Valencia have only managed this lofty spot due to the team’s home form. On the road, the Mestalla men have only picked up two points, the second worst record in the division. At their own ground, it’s a handy five wins and a draw from six. But even this disguises the reality that the opponents in those wins – Atlético Madrid aside – were hardly world-beaters: Celta Vigo, Zaragoza, Athletic Bilbao and Espanyol. In Saturday’s match, Valencia were reliant on a late and incorrectly awarded penalty for their victory against the still-fuming Pericos.

Mestalla: Home sweet home, for once

To be fair, Valencia are top of the table in their Champions League group, thanks to a couple of victories over BATE and a home win against Lille. But LLL has a feeling that situation won’t last much more than a few hours, with the mighty Bayern Munich coming to town and looking for a victory to seal the deal for the qualification for the next round.

Bayern boss Jupp Heynckes very politely swatted away the notion that Valencia are little more than Roberto Soldado (when on form), opining that “he’s a great goalscorer, but there isn’t just him. Valencia also have other dangerous attacking players, such as Feghouli and Guardado.” Meanwhile, Pellegrino also did his duty with the playing-for-the-win bit: “We won’t be going out for a draw because we have the chance to finish first, which would be fantastic.”

There’s a Valencia link in tonight's other Spaincentric Champions League clash, what with Unai Emery trying to make it 15th time lucky as a coach by beating Barcelona. One of the blog’s all-time favourite people ever, the king of the pitch-side squatting and pointing is now in charge of Spartak Moscow, whose main tactics for beating Barcelona appear to be having an artificial pitch and relying on it being a bit chilly. “We need to look at where to find their weaknesses,” mused Unai, rifling through pieces of paper. “The statistics show that it’s there.”

Emery: "Fingers crossed, double-eye-poke, and we'll win!"

One of those soft spots for Barça is that the side doesn’t have a great record on Ruskie soil, with just one win from six European games – that victory back in the 2002/2003 season during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Still, Tito Vilanova is still rattled by the Celtic business and pointed out that “Emery always gives us problems” when quite clearly he doesn’t.

With Wednesday featuring Real Madrid at Man City and Málaga schlepping to Zenit, the blog feels that there is a decent chance that there won’t be a single win for a Spanish team in the Champions League this week, with Valencia and Barcelona leading the way on Tuesday night.

Good Day, Bad Day: Stunning Sevilla, more Messi marvels and barmy Bielsa

2012-11-19T10:32:00Z

RESULTS Sat 17 Nov Osasuna 0-0 Malaga, Valencia 2-1 Espanyol, Barcelona 3-1 Real Zaragoza, Real Madrid 5-1 Athletic Bilbao Sun 18 Nov Deportivo 0-2 Levante, Celta Vigo 1-1 Mallorca, Getafe 2-1 Real Valladolid, Granada 0-1 Atletico Madrid, Sevilla 5-1 Real Betis.

Good Day

Barcelona
The 3-1 victory over Zaragoza saw Barça move on to 34 points from a possible 36 in la Liga, and also once again be in possession of an orthodox defence (relatively speaking) with the Starbuck and Apollo of Spanish football - Gerard Piqué and the indestructible Carles Puyol - back alongside each other for the first time since mid-September.

Leo Messi
The opinion piece simply titled ‘Leo Messi’ by Mundo Deportivo’s Santi Nolla on Sunday was a bit of a brief one - “there are no words left,” was all that was written. La Liga Loca can only imagine that the footballer and new father has a sound-proofed nursery and a massive team of minions on hand to enable the Argentinean to slog to and from South America for matches, as well as around the grounds of la Primera and the Camp Nou and keep on delivering again and again and again. Saturday’s victory over Zaragoza saw two goals and an assist from little Leo to make it 17 in la Primera so far this season, with Tito Vilanova still insisting that “he doesn’t win the game alone.” Zaragoza counterpart, Manolo Jiménez, disagreed and countered that “we would have won this game if we had Messi.”

Atlético Madrid
To be honest, the clash at Granada was a bit of a grinding slog to get through, but the Rojiblancos won’t care as it was a fourth Primera away win of the season and gave them enough points to ensure that when they walk out for the Madrid derby in a fortnight's time they will be ahead of their rivals in the table for the first time since 1998/99. Doesn’t mean they have any chance of winning the game, mind.

Karim Benzema
It’s still not entirely clear whether the Frenchman scored one or two in the 5-1 drubbing of Athletic Bilbao from Saturday night, but it’s enough for the general feeling in the Madridista world that it was Benzema’s best game for Real Madrid. Well, it certainly was for AS and Marca who join in the praise and swoon over the “grand recital of Benzema”.

Levante
Far less tunnel-tussling drama against Deportivo than in last week’s Real Madrid clash. An immensely typical long ball, counter-attacking away win for Levante who had their usual 33% possession and scored two goals with it to move the team into the Champions League places due to the collapses of Málaga and Betis.

Sevilla
LLL, like everyone else, really didn’t see the 5-1 over an awful Betis coming. Especially not a goal after 12 seconds from the sprightly José Antonio Reyes on one of his four-yearly good days. Sevilla showed the kind of strength, determination and ambition that has been distinctly absent from the side all season, enough to make Míchel the Manager both happy and upset at the same time, imagines LLL. “It was the best first half I’ve experienced, even as a player,” announced the former Real Madrid man.

Mauricio Pellegrino
Managers are always entertaining. When they are on the wrong end of decisions from referees they go nuts. When it goes their way as with a bad penalty call in the 2-1 win over Espanyol, they shrug and claim it’s only fair. The Valencia boss, of course, did the latter this week, saying that “I don’t know if it was lucky but against Betis and Levante we lost having more chances.” Although to be fair to the Argentinean, Pellegrino did admit that “we didn’t deserve the victory.”

Angel Lafita
A 2-1 win over Valladolid that was soooooooo Getafe, through and through. Whenever the Coliseum club need to get a result - back to back defeats being the last two outings - Getafe always seem to manage it. Sunday’s victory was down a lovely bit of play from Queen Lafita with one of the goals of the round. Luis García still has the concern though that out of the 14 goals scored in la Liga this season just one has been converted by an actual striker.

Mallorca
The Balearic side only picked up a point away at Celta, but it wasn’t league defeat number seven in a row for Mallorca. “At least we broke a run of not picking up any points,” said Joaquín Caparrós who noted that neither side would be overly happy with the result.

Bad Day

La Liga
This is a tired drum LLL is beating here, but the two matches for Barcelona and Real Madrid really were a waste of everyone’s time. Before-hand, the blog predicted the two sides would score nine between them. The only shock of the night was that it was a mere eight, with Barça letting the side down. Over in England and two big guns in the form of Manchester United and Chelsea lost over the weekend. The superiority of the Premier League at the moment comes from the fact that neither result could really be described as a shock, just the sign of a healthy, competitive league where the collective is considered more important than a couple of individuals.

Osasuna & Málaga
It is an admittedly curious decision for LLL to throw two sides who fought out a goalless draw into the bad day brig, but it’s down to the fact that Osasuna had a perfectly good goal ruled out for offside in the goalless draw and Málaga have now picked up just two points in the team’s last four league games.

Betis
Horrendous all over the pitch. From a mad performance from Adrián in goal whose giveaway allowed José Antonio Reyes allowed Sevilla to take the lead after 12 seconds, to a dithering defence and a completely toothless, dawdling midfield, it was a horror show from Betis in the 5-1 defeat.

Marcelo Bielsa
AS were somewhat mean about Athletic Bilbao and their oddball manager, but you sense that it was for a reason - because the side last season was just so life-affirming and luscious and this one now feels like having gone through “a twenty year long boring marriage,” with Bielsa who has gone from being a “druid in a tracksuit” to an “old man in pajamas going for a walk on the touchline.” Athletic Bilbao had shipped 14 goals in the previous three visits to the Santiago Bernabeu, but this was by far the worst version of the team by a long way.

Deportivo
Dearie me. Everything that could go wrong, pretty much did go wrong for Deportivo, beaten at home 2-0 by Levante on Sunday. Both centre-backs were off injured within 14 minutes, goalkeeper, Dani Aranzubia, was sent off to be replaced by a midfielder after all the substitutes were used and Riki missed a penalty.

Espanyol
The poor Pericos just can’t get a break at the moment. Just two minutes from full time, and Espanyol were about to grab the most handy of points in Mestalla. Instead, the referee saw a handball from Héctor Moreno after a cross from Antonio Barragán when it had actually hit the defender’s chest. Cue penalty and sending off for the fuming aforementioned stopper. “I understand the reaction of the Espanyol players,” said a sympathetic Roberto Soldado who took the spot kick to give Valencia the 2-1 win. “Unfair, undeserved and with a fairly bad treatment from the referees,” seethed Espanyol boss, Mauricio Pochettino afterwards.

La Preview: Managers make history, Baptista nears comeback, Betis eye a bright future

2012-11-16T08:30:00Z

Saturday

Osasuna (20th) v Málaga (5th) - 16.00 (all kick-offs local time)
Back-to-back home defeats to Rayo Vallecano and Real Sociedad had Manuel Pellegrini suggesting his team needed a dose of fresh ideas and a pick-me-up. Theoretically, that beast-shaped boost may soon be arriving in the form of Julio ‘I’d forgotten about him’ Baptista, who has been out-of-order for over a year with Achilles tendon problems.
“We don’t know the exact date but we are thinking about the end of this month and the start of the next,” explained the Brazilian when asked about his big return. Baptista will then be reunited with former Madrid team-mate Javier Saviola, for a bit of an old school 2007 Bernabeu vibe. Whistle posse in the house.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Valencia (9th) v Espanyol (19th) -18.00
There isn't much to celebrate on the financial side in Spain at the moment, with riots and a General Strike dominating the week’s news. But one positive point is that the now relatively steep cost of sacking managers sees every Primera coach who started the season still present and correct heading into round 12 for the first time in 20 years.
But it was almost not the case, with Espanyol's Mauricio Pochettino on the brink after his side's home defeat to Osasuna last Saturday was met with both boos and general disinterest from fans. However, a meeting the manager, sporting director Ramón Planes and what’s left of the board saw the former pair secure their roles for another week at least, although firing the technical team three days before Monday's presidential election would not have been the smartest of moves for the Pericos.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Real Zaragoza (11th) - 20.00
If there’s one person who really doesn’t like José Mourinho and probably has photographs of the Madrid manager in his Catalan bathroom for all the wrong reasons, it’s ‘out-there’ Sport columnist, Lluís Mascaró. The scowling scribe loves dumping the blame for every crime committed under the sun at the Portuguese coach's door.
At the start of the week, the crack-pot blamed Mourinho for the tunnel bust-up at Levante, highlighting his apparent love of stirring things up. A few days later, another opportunity arose to take a pot shot at the Special One when Pep Guardiola won the coach of the year trinket at the Spanish League awards - trophies voted for by players and coaches of the top two divisions.
“Football humiliates Mourinho,” sneers the headline. And why? “Because the values that this Barcelona exemplify are much more in symphony with what SPORT means with capital letters. And that’s knowing how to win and how to lose,” writes Mascaró before spending the next 1000 words finding ways to show how Mourinho and Ronaldo are bunch of stinky wee-breaths.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (3rd) v Athletic Bilbao (12th) - 22.00
Sergio Ramos is apparently suffering a bit of back gip, but still soldiering on, even managing to score for Spain in the 5-1 friendly win in Panama. While on duty with the national side, the defender LLL will always have a spot for opened-up about the Levante scrap, suggesting that Sergio Ballesteros should take up boxing. “I’ve always had a good relationship with Ballesteros,” claimed Ramos to Spanish radio station, Cadena Ser. “Before the game, he congratulated me for my success with Madrid and the national team.” However, things soured after the rain-sodden victory in Valencia. “I saw some things in the tunnel that were out of place.” And as for a thorny relationship with this club manager, “we’ve had our differences from time to time,” admits Ramos.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Deportivo (18th) v Levante (6th) - 12.00
“Move along! Nothing to see here!” That’s certainly the attitude of the Spanish FA after the big hullabaloo surrounding Levante’s most recent match. The Competition Committee decided to avoid punishing David Navarro for his elbow on Cristiano Ronaldo, and also opted not to investigate the tunnel fracas which allegedly saw Pepe and Sergio Ballesteros having (or at least trying to have) a dirty dust-up.
However the the Referees’ Technical Committee did report a pair of Levante players for unfortunate post-match suggestions. Juanlu stormed that the game was rigged so as to make sure the league title race wasn’t over whilst Pape Diop yelled to the press in stronger terms than detailed here that the match was a “blooming robbery and you have to report this.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Celta Vigo (17th) v Mallorca (15th) - 16.00
Nerves of steel LLL is loath to call crisis too soon, but it may have to on Sunday if Mallorca lose to Celta Vigo, to make it a losing streak of seven in a row for the Balearic side. However, Joaquín Caparrós says there’s no need to panic yet and knows what’s going wrong. Not that the Mallorca boss is going to tell the rest of us, mind, “The analysis is ours. The only reality is that we need to pick up points to break this run and the rest stays in the dressing room.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Getafe (14th) v Valladolid (8th) - 17.50
While Getafe president Angel Torres has been in Mexico looking for a buyer for the club - the über rich Carlos Slim is one reported possibility - talk back at the Coliseum concerns something the owner, manager and fans already know: that Getafe are bit...well...wet. Something that the nothing performance in the 2-0 defeat to Atlético Madrid last week displayed in full.
“We can lose games, but attitude is something we should demand of ourselves,” admitted a crestfallen Miguel Torres. But the club’s biggest problem still continues to be up front, with Getafe being the second least effective side in la Primera so far this season, with the team needing on average 12 chances to score a goal.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Granada (16th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 19.45
Yes, Atlético Madrid may be a proper, grown-up club now, with all those entertaining last minute own goals out of their system, but there’s still an enormous amount of fun to be had at the Rojiblanco’s expense. This week’s story concerns the fact that according to Apple and their new global imaging system wotsit, the Vicente Calderón will eternally be without grass. An overhead shot of the neighbourhood was taken on the 20th of May when the grass had been removed to allow a Coldplay concert to take place, before a new pitch was laid for the Copa del Rey final. Instead of a lush green surface and rickety concrete stands, where the pitch should be is light brown sand. For the rest of time. Or at least until an update is made, anyway.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sevilla (10th) v Betis (4th) - 21.30
Despite there still being a few financial issues hanging over from the Manuel Ruiz de Lopera days, the present for Real Betis is rather bright as they head into Sunday night’s derby. There could even be a bright future too, with plans unveiled for an Athletic Bilbao style youth development set-up.
The Heliópolis project aims to ensure 75% of the first team squad will be players from the youth system in the space of ten years. “Andalusia reflected in Betis,” went the blurb. The club will also borrow ideas from la Masia and have all the teams down the ranks playing in the same manner. Woo hoo!
LLL Prediction - Draw

Monday

Real Sociedad (13th) v Rayo Vallecano - 21.30
Wednesday was general strike day in Spain, but only a couple of teams in the Brotherhood Collective joined in by having a slow day, namely Celta and Rayo Vallecano. To be fair to the Madrid club, the players probably didn’t have too much choice in merely working out in the gym a bit and having a technical chat with the manager, as last time there was a big strike, some of the Ultras came down to the training ground and suggested politely that the footballers might want to join in the day of protest. To avoid this occurring on Wednesday, the training facility was shut tighter than a Catalan the day before pay-day in order to avoid any unwanted intrusions and political guidance
LLL Prediction - Home win

Money talks as Panama pay to play Spain

2012-11-14T11:44:00Z

If La Liga Loca happened to be Spanish – or was handed a passport, Marcos Senna-style – and very, very good at football, then it would be tickled pink to be traveling to Panama on what is ostensibly a tiring, pointless friendly trip apparently designed solely to make the Spanish FA a bit richer.

The trans-Atlantic adventure would be a chance to see the Panama Canal, perhaps the greatest engineering feat ever, ever, ever. After the Pyramids, perhaps. Or the Santiago Bernabeu public address system, which if pointed in the right direction and cranked up to 11 could shatter the moon into tiny pieces.

Vicente Del Bosque's 19-man party are pictured in Wednesday’s papers taunting the blog at one of the canal’s locks, looking distinctly unexcited, as only footballers can be when either meeting incredibly distinguished people or visiting remarkable places of interest.

However, there’s mixed reactions in the two main Spanish papers as to the relevance of the world champions' latest friendly, which follows similar recent jaunts to Costa Rica and Puerto Rico. Marca are doing their bit for king and country, backing the FA by justifying the game as a means of spreading the good word of Spain around the world, pleasing globally-minded sponsors. “The Canal of Stars!” yells the headline.

Flowing locks: the Spain players pop down the canal

AS, on the other hand, don't even attempt to disguise the main value of the match to Spain – the €3m fee. “That’s the reason Spain are playing today in Panama, at 33 degrees and 75 percent humidity. It will be at 22.30 our time, televised only if the General Strike permits it,” laments the paper’s editorial.

Del Bosque has done his duty, talking up the game in Panama by saying that “we have to show ourselves in the best possible light” around the world. Meanwhile, Cesc Fabregas was forced to clarify his comments that the game would be of no use in preparing for the crucial France clash in March. “I did not say that it wouldn’t be of any use,” back-pedalled the Barcelona midfielder. “We always want to win but lacking so many footballers, it is not going to help us prepare for France.”

Those missing from the squad traveling across the Atlantic – for the seventh time since Spain became world champions just over two years ago – include Carles Puyol, Gerard Pique, Xavi, Xabi Alonso, David Silva, Fernando Torres and Alvaro Arbeloa.

The old guard's absence creates space, and the friendly has brought a first call-up for Markel Susaeta. However, the Athletic Bilbao winger – born in the Basque country – enraged the more strident parts of the meanie Twitterverse by avoiding using the world ‘Spain’ when asked what it was like to be with the national side.

“We represent... a thing... and well, we have to give our all and show respect in all circumstances,” flannelled the flanker. The fairly shy young man also said that “it’s an honour to take part in a training session and a game with them, so I’m really happy,” causing the maternal blog to leap in front of him, yelling “leave him alone!”

The match will be a positive point for some, like the returning David Villa and Santi Cazorla, so Spain’s performances may not be as flat and lifeless as those in previous friendlies. For this reason LLL suspects a comfy 2-0 win – although perhaps not one watched by many, what with the match finishing past midnight in the homeland after a hard day of either rioting, protesting, or sitting about in bars to support the General Strike.

Was a secret and Special third party behind Pepe/Ballesteros bust-up?

2012-11-13T12:44:00Z

La Liga Loca is just imagining the immensity of the frightful kerfuffle. A few minutes after the end of Sunday’s clash between Levante and Real Madrid - one that was both fiery and soggy - there was an almighty noise in the tunnel outside the dressing rooms at the Ciutat de Valencia stadium. There must have been an identical conversation in both of them. “Goodness gracious, what is the manner of that hullabaloo?”

“Oh, it’s just Pepe and Sergio Ballesteros duking it out. Fancy, trying to break it up?”

“My giddy aunt, prevent a scrap between someone with a history of hot-headedness and an eight-foot, 16-stone beast of a man with nothing to lose? I should think not, sir.”

But it’s the fight after the fight that’s talk of the Madrid papers on Tuesday, with the rumbling fall-out from a Madrid victory that left Cristiano Ronaldo with just the one barely functioning eye. To be more accurate, the big talking point is identifying who started the fight after the fight. Unsurprisingly, the answer to that riddle all depends on what side of the great la Liga divide you stand.

What we know for sure is that Pepe and Ballesteros had a bit of set-to after the match, with a few others getting involved for good measure. The referee’s report calmly states that “players, coaches and staff from both teams and security were trying to break up two people who were having a discussion in a provocative and threatening manner.”

The Pepe camp claims the hulking Levante defender went towards the medical room in which Ronaldo was being treated, looking for a bit of post-match afters. Pepe saw this and intervened. Punches were then thrown, apparently. “He’s always the same,” announced Sergio Ramos when things had died down a little. “If (Ballesteros) wants to punch people then he should become a boxer.”

The Pepe-is-innocent story is also backed up by Real Madrid on an institutional level, in the form of a straight-laced 'official communication'.

“At the end of the game, the attitude and behaviour of the players, technical team and members of the travel party were correct and irreproachable at all times,” read the statement, rejecting any accusations that Pepe deserved to be sent to the naughty step.

Unsurprisingly, the Ballesteros-is-innocent camp claim Pepe was all with the taunting and dancing after the match, and took the opportunity to let out some aggression on the Levante man as he innocently popped in to check on Ronaldo’s health. “I’ve never attacked anyone in my life, let alone Pepe,” declared Ballesteros. “I went to see how Cristiano was.”

The centre-back also said that David Navarro didn’t mean to nearly decapitate the Real Madrid man, who was forced to pull out of international action this week. “I spoke to him and at no moment did he see that Ronaldo was there, it could have happened in any game,” claimed the Levante captain.

However, the always imaginative Lluís Mascaró, writing in Barcelona based Sport, has managed to find a third potential culprit in the shenanigans. The title of his entry in Monday’s edition may give a clue as to who that could be - “Madrid, the most hated team in the world.”

“Madrid are received as the enemy in the majority of football grounds. The fault of the situation is, without doubt, Mourinho, with his strategy of stirring things up.”

LLL is forced to wonder if the Madrid manager has a handy left-hook. Would have been useful on Sunday night...

Good Day, Bad Day: Winning in the rain, Messi’s landmark, and old-school Osasuna

2012-11-12T12:03:00Z

RESULTS Fri 9 Nov Real Betis 1-2 Granada Sat 10 Nov Rayo Vallecano 3-2 Celta Vigo, Espanyol 0-3 Osasuna, Real Zaragoza 5-3 Deportivo, Malaga 1-2 Real Sociedad Sun 11 Nov Real Valladolid 1-1 Valencia, Athletic Bilbao 2-1 Sevilla, Mallorca 2-4 Barcelona, Atletico Madrid 2-0 Getafe, Levante 1-2 Real Madrid.

Good Day

Leo Messi
Still quite mad at back, but still functioning up front, with Leo Messi bagging a brace to take his tally to 15 goals in 11 games, the best performance in the Pichichi stakes by a player since the 1950-51 season. Barcelona have now equalled the best ever start to a league campaign by any side, despite Tito Vilanova lamenting the fact that “any small mistake costs us a goal.”

Cristiano Ronaldo
He may not have actually been able to see through either eye at the time thanks to a horrendous elbow from the charmless David Navarro, but Cristiano still managed to give Madrid the lead against Levante before being unable to continue in the second half.

Alvaro Morata
A late goal with his first touch of the game for the ‘cantera’ striker ensured happy headlines in the Madrid papers, and left the increasingly weary José Mourinho facing yet more questions on his attitude to the youth ranks.

José Mourinho
Surprisingly little moaning from the Portuguese coach - probably because his side won - despite lots of ammunition including Levante’s rather brusque tactics (which actually lead to the two free-kicks from which Madrid scored) and the rainy conditions. In fact, Mourinho appeared to relish them. “This is what football is like as well. Football is winter. When you were a kid, it was a party to play in the rain.”

Atlético Madrid
La Liga Loca didn’t quite get the fretting and fussing being made in some quarters about Atlético losing to Valencia and then to Academica in the Europa League. The Madrid side are not going to win every single match this season, despite having a sublime record prior to this double defeat, so no biggie. Normal, competent business was restored against Getafe in the Vicente Calderón on Sunday evening with a 2-0 win and a tremendously uneventful game.

Paco Jémez
The Rayo boss has been grumbling all season that referees have it in for his team after a number of red cards and penalties given against the side. Well, chicken’s bedspreads, all that has been forgotten (until the next time) after Rayo were given a spot-kick at 2-2 against Celta after a clear hand-ball, a penalty which was duly converted to give the side a 3-2 win. The problem is that the guilty culprit in the offending action was a Rayo striker. Oh, they were also playing against ten men for about 50 minutes.

Helder Postiga
Zaragoza and Deportivo played their parts in a wonderfully mad Saturday night in la Liga, an evening which produced 19 goals in four games. Zaragoza were 2-0 down before a bit of a flimsy penalty for handball - converted by Apoño - and the sending off of Depor's Pizzi allowed the home team back into the game. And Zaragoza did it in some style, with Helder Postiga - who is actually quite good despite the iffy reputation - scoring a couple to give his club a 5-3 win.

Markel Susaeta
Perhaps the only Athletic player having a fun time at the moment. Friday saw a call up to the Spanish national side for the attacking midfielder, then on Sunday he produced the winning goal for Bilbao in a tremendously much-needed 2-1 home victory against Sevilla.

Carlos Vela
48 seconds! That’s all it took for the former Arsenal man to give Real Sociedad the lead at Málaga, a goal the home side never really recovered from.

Granada
Of course, as soon as LLL predicts that Granada will never find their way out of the bottom three after falling into it last weekend, the Andalusians go and win a regional derby at Betis 2-1. Good on them for sticking to 'The Man'! It certainly left Granada coach, Juan Antonio Anquela - think modern day Kurt Russell with 80s Kurt Russell hair - a happy chappy. “Three important points for a team that never stopped believing in themselves,” said the former Alcorcón boss.

Osasuna
Now that was fun. Osasuna temporarily found their mojo, albeit against a flimsy Espanyol side who were defeated 3-0 in Cornella to show that the team really must stick with José Luis Mendilibar. The performance was mainly down to wonderfully tough tackling in midfield, where either the ball or a knee-cap was the prize. Fortunately on a couple of occasions it was the former.

Bad Day

Betis
A home defeat to Granada is the sort of result which will have fans of Champions League-chasing Betis grinding their teeth, kicking themselves their until legs (one at least) fall off and yelling ‘noooo!’ to the heavens. “We aren’t going to let our heads drop because of this defeat,” promised Pepe Mel. Incidentally: Friday night football. Enough. Seriously. If the game can’t be played on a Monday due to international action, and no match in la Primera may overlap with another then stick it on at 14.00 on a Saturday afternoon. A perfectly good time for a game of football.

Málaga
With all due to respect to Real Sociedad, a dreadful shame for Málaga, whose league form has collapsed somewhat over the past couple of rounds with two home defeats to teams they really should be beating. The first loss was a 2-1 defeat to Rayo last weekend. The most recent was another set-back, again by 2-1, but against Real Sociedad who can usually be relied upon to roll over away from home. “We have a lot of spirit, but not many ideas,” complained Manuel Pellegrini whose team are now five points behind Real Madrid in third.

Valencia
A perfect storm for Valencia on Sunday. Before the clash at Valladolid, Valencia had only picked up a single point from five away matches in la Liga this season. What’s more, the Mestalla men had only picked up one point playing at midday in four games. Naturally, the two curses combined to give Valencia a 1-1 draw and leave the Champions League chasers four points off the top four.

Sevilla
Míchel the Manager really isn’t of a good humour at the moment, with just the single victory in six league matches. The latest setback was a 2-1 defeat to Athletic Bilbao when his players only performed sporadically. “In the second half, not a single tactical instruction nor change was performed as we were hoping,” complained the coach who doubted some of the footballers commitment to the cause.

Mallorca
A rotten run continues for the Balearic side with the 4-2 home defeat by Barcelona being the team’s sixth league defeat in a row to leave Mallorca just a point from the relegation zone.

Celta Vigo
A two goal lead lost, a man sent off and Rayo’s winning goal awarded after a horrendously wrong referee decision than ended in a penalty. The only bright moment for the Galician side was a very tasty brace from Iago Aspas in the 3-2 defeat.

Deportivo
Rather like their Galicia neighbours, Celta Vigo, Deportivo had a 2-0 lead but struggled to hang on to it with a man down. To be fair though, Celta made a better job of it by only losing 3-2 after an iffy penalty rather than a 5-3 shellacking.

Espanyol
Terribly sad sights in Cornella with normally positive, loyal fans leaving the stadium some 20 minutes early with Osasuna’s third, which left Espanyol bottom-of-the-table after a very sorry defeat “We were never in the game,” admitted Mauricio Pochettino, who can almost certainly put the defeat down to some horrendously dithering defending from his players.
“People are tired. There’s an atmosphere that surrounds the whole club that generates fatigue.”

La Preview: No praise for Piti, Osasuna on the edge and Bielsa’s latest barminess

2012-11-09T16:26:00Z

FRIDAY

Betis (4th) v Granada (19th) - 21.30 (all times local)
The tiny, tiny, tiny spark of hope for Granada fans during last weekend's 2-1 home loss to Athletic Bilbao, which saw the Andalusian side fall into the relegation zone, was the return of Dani Benítez. The midfielder had finished a three-month ban for lobbing a bottle at a referee at the end of a tempestuous clash with Real Madrid at the end of the last campaign and is rather happy to be back, albeit apparently with a worryingly hyperactive metabolism. “The past three months have been hard. I wouldn’t wish any footballer that kind of punishment. I understand that the Federation has to punish such severe acts but they have to understand that we are going at 300 heart beats per minute,” explained a very red-faced Benítez.
LLL Prediction - Home win

SATURDAY

Rayo Vallecano (11th) v Celta Vigo (15th) - 16.00
Pity poor, er, Piti. Last Saturday, the Rayo player scored two goals to lead his team to a glorious victory at Málaga. But does this win him any recognition whatsoever from the readers of Marca, a group should quite like all things football? That’s a big fat zero.
In a weekly poll where the readers get to vote on the best player of the previous weekend’s football, the Rayo forward came just seventh below a raft of Real Madrid and Barcelona players topped by Ronaldo and Messi, neither of whom scored in their respective games. Indeed, out of the 16 players who received votes, only four don't play for Barça or Madrid. Roberto Soldado, who scored a stonker against Atlético Madrid, didn’t get anything at all. It’s as if nobody gives two hoots about any one aside from the Big Two. Imagine that!
LLL Prediction - Home win

Espanyol (18th) v Osasuna (16th) - 18.00
LLL has been spectacularly wrong this season when predicting that managerial heads will roll. But the Spanish tea leaves suggest José Luis Mendilibar will be the first Primera head to be chopped if Osasuna fail to get something out of Saturday’s Espanyol clash. Nevertheless, as is ever the case, the footballers are behind the boss, etc, etc, before welcoming their new alien overlords a day later. “It wouldn’t be good if the boss goes,” admits goalkeeper Andrés Fernández, “But he’s still the same as he is when things are going well, still cantankerous, shouting and working hard.”
LLL Prediction - Draw

Zaragoza (12th) v Deportivo (16th) - 20.00
Oh dear. Poor Deportivo are set to go into administration if a deal cannot be struck over the next four months with the hardball-playing tax authorities in Spain who will now be embargoing all the club’s income to pay down the debt with the ‘Hacienda’ which stands at at least €34m. If things weren’t already tough enough at club that has to rely on Riki for goals, it seems that the footballers may well be going unpaid. “The viability of the club will never, never, never be in danger. Not in any case,” promised Depor president Augusto Lendoiro, a figure who will apparently be dealing with the issues of enormous overspend of the early part of the decade for the rest of his days.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (5th) v Real Sociedad (17th) - 22.00
Bad news for mad Antoine Griezmann, but good news for Real Sociedad with the club’s gobby, party-loving, constantly-wanting-to-leave footballer banned from any kind of footballing activity with France – at youth or full international level – for quite some time. Having gone before the nation’s very busy disciplinary body this week, the wicked wide boy has been outcast until the start of 2014 after breaking curfew during his last U20 call-up for a night out at a discotheque. A few days later France lost 5-3 to Norway.
LLL Prediction - Home win

SUNDAY

Valladolid (8th) v Valencia (9th) - 12.00
Two goals for Sophiane Feghouli against BATE led Valencia to a 4-2 home win which ended up considerably closer than it should have been, considering the Spanish side were 3-0 up at one point. Arguably the club’s best player at the moment, the midfielder is becoming the next walking price-tag set to be sold so the club can buy a few bags of cement for the construction of New Mestalla, which may or may not be completed faster than the Sagrada Familia. “I'm happy here, and I want to play for the time for the maximum time possible,” said the Algerian, eight months before a move to Chelsea or Manchester City.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Athletic Bilbao (16.00) v Sevilla (7th) - 16.00
Perhaps LLL’s favourite story of the year. Marcelo Bielsa has an expertly designed and constructed running track built around Athletic’s Lezema training centre. For about two metres, the track runs between a road and a garage for the ground staff's lawnmowers. So of course, the Athletic boss bans the pitch-pokers from using the garage, so as not to damage that section, and makes them park their machines on the verge outside. Wonderful madness.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mallorca (13th) v Barcelona (1st) - 17.50
Mallorca's players and fans may or may not have not enjoyed Barça's midweek loss to Celtic: it either showed how to beat Barça or provoked talk of the Catalans looking to dish out a bit of a beating, licking wounds, point to prove, etc. However, in either case the omens aren't great for Mallorca, who have lost five league matches in a row and were recently whipped 5-0 in the Balearics by Real Madrid. “We are not worried because there’s still a lot of games left, but to lose five in a row is not a good sign,” admitted goalkeeper Dudú Aouate. “But apart from the Madrid game, which was really bad, we didn’t deserve to lose the other four.”
LLL Prediction - Away win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Getafe (10th)
And so Dani Güiza leaves both Getafe (for a second time) and Spanish shores, having contributed pretty much diddly squat to the Coliseum club in a season and a quarter spell – apart from some extra frown-lines on the forehead of manager Luis García. Thirty league appearances and three goals last season, and not a single second this year. Unsurprisingly, a figure in Spain known for being rather fond of the nightlife has gone to pastures new. To Malaysia, to be exact, to join Johor. “To be honest, I don’t know much about Malaysian football, but I’ve seen some videos of games on the internet before coming and it seems like it’s passionate football.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Levante (7th) v Real Madrid (3rd) - 21.30
LLL really doesn’t know if the current hot topic in the Spanish capital of Mourinho and club’s cantera (youth system) provides enormous enjoyment or simply makes the blog want to bang its head on the table until it falls off and rolls into the kitchen. To bring everyone up to date, the Spanish press have been baiting Mourinho for failing to promote from within where possible. The weary response from the Madrid boss was that the Castilla players are either too old, not good enough, playing out of position or not getting enough games.
The first question to Mourinho at Monday’s press conference ahead of the Borussia Dortmund game wasn’t on the match but whether a failure to attend a ceremony earlier that day at Valdebebas was a slur to the club or because he wasn’t invited. As the Portuguese pointed out quite correctly, he would have been criticised for both going and not going.
The debate may well reopen this weekend, with Gonzalo Higuaín and Karim Benzema both out injured for the next few matches, leaving a place open for Castilla striker and first-team squad member Alvaro Morata. But funnily enough, Mourinho may well chose to field someone called Cristiano Ronaldo as a centre-forward instead.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Barça prove that size does matter, as Málaga earn themselves a siesta

2012-11-08T14:30:00Z

Thursday morning presented something of a tricky balancing act for the Catalan press, in the wake of Barcelona’s first Champions League defeat this season, and indeed the first on the road in the competition’s group stages since October 2006. How to simultaneously act not that bothered by the result, while also being really quite bothered by the result. Fortunately, they have had a bit of practice in that regard down the years...

As far as their hopes of progression are concerned, the defeat to Celtic is a mere bizzy, buzzy wasp of inconvenience, most likely forcing Tito Vilanova to continue fielding proper players for the final two matches - away at Spartak Moscow and home to Benfica - in order to ensure top spot. There’s no danger whatsoever of Barça not qualifying for the knock-out stages, a concern that Real Madrid may have at the back of their minds. However, it underlines the “Chelsea Syndrome” of the team and the eternal problem of a lack of plan ‘B’.

Sport’s front page laments a lack of “luck and precision” in Glasgow, as well the Barça squad’s Hobbit-like nature. “If you don’t have tall players then you will suffer from set pieces,” sniffs the match report on Celtic’s first strike, which saw wee Jordi Alba failing to leap five feet into the air to cover the particularly un-wee Victor Wanyama. Questioned on this familiar topic, Tito Vilanova responded that “if we signed taller players we wouldn’t play so well.”

Aside from that gripe, the newspaper trotted out the statistics to prove that Barcelona should have won, with the visitors having 75% possession and 13 shots on target, figures that dwarf those of Celtic - no pun intended. “If there are few games where losing doesn’t matter, this was one of those,” wrote Josep Maria Casanovas, who suggests helpfully that the players “turn the page, but learn the lesson.”

Joan Poquí, writing in Mundo Deportivo, seems to have had a fine time at a stadium where supporters make lots of noise and seem enthusiastic about their team, something unfamiliar at the homes of Spain’s big two. “It’s not a legend: the stadium literally shakes,” he gushes.

In what was a fairly mad week of Champions League football in Spain, the least reliable la Liga side in the competition, Valencia, were the only Spanish side of the four taking part to come away with a victory. Although, to be fair, the east coast club had by far the easiest tie, with the visit of BATE from Belarus. However, Valencia did try to get into the spirit of things in the entertainment stakes by taking a 3-0 lead and then nearly throwing it away to be hauled back to 3-2, before Sofiane Feghouli scored his second of the night to seal the three points.

Despite that win, Valencia still have a fair amount of work to do, unlike Málaga, who's draw in their match with Milan was enough to make sure that the southern side were the only Spanish team who'll be able to take a siesta through the last two Champions League rounds.

Málaga star in San Siro as Messi packs his pacifier

2012-11-07T14:23:00Z

On many occasions, LLL is delighted to be proved wrong. And that’s a good thing too, considering such circumstances tend to happen about 50 times a day. The most recent moment that the blog is aware of is predicting Milan to beat Málaga in Tuesday’s Champions League clash in Berlusconi’s boudoir.

It certainly wasn’t a forecast made to besmirch the quality and the ability of the Primera players, more a fear that the malaise evident in Saturday’s defeat at Rayo – which LLL feels stems from the ongoing broken promises to the players about their salaries – would carry over to the Champions League.

Thankfully, Málaga didn’t let themselves down, nor their families, their pets, their club, their supporters, their respective countries or even Málaga’s owner, who clearly cares so much about his charges that he leaves them checking down the backs of sofas for their bus fare to training.

The 1-1 draw against the Serie A side showed that the Málaga footballers are blessed with stones the size of the Eiffel Tower, and a fine footballer in the form of Eliseu, who scored their goal of the night and his fourth in this season’s Champions League to prove that he isn’t just an enormous diver with an admittedly hard shot.

Howard Webb refuses to cuddle El-Shaarawy

The point gained puts Málaga through to the last 16 with two matches to spare – not something that Manuel Pellegrini’s former employers in the Spanish capital can boast – and a fine chance of topping group C.

“We don’t need to send a message to anyone,” insisted the Málaga boss, when asked if his team needed to send a message to anyone. “The team has overcome situations and keeps on looking forward.”

While Málaga are sitting atop a tremendously comfortable Champions League cushion supping on hot minestrone soup, Real Madrid are going to have to work their expensively sponsored socks off in their final two group D matches – at Manchester City and then back at base against Ajax. Normally, logic and history would suggest that the latter of those clashes is a home banker, but that’s not been the case in this scary group of death.

Madrid came a winkle’s whisker away from losing to the English side in the opening group game and nearly came a cropper again on Tuesday but were handed an escape chute and a point thanks to a late Mesut Özil free-kick and a howler from the previously excellent Borussia Dortmund keeper Roman Weidenfeller.

The match finished 2-2 despite the claims of José Mourinho who informed the media afterwards that his team actually scored three goals, doggedly including a José Callejón effort ruled out for offside early in the second half. AS disagrees, suggesting that the effort was correctly ruled out and that Özil’s effort had “prevented a crisis”.

"Phew, got away with it again"

The result leaves Madrid not only with a bit of work to do over the next month but potentially without both strikers for the weekend’s visit to Levante, what with Karim Benzema missing the match with an iffy groin and Gonzalo Higuaín dropping out at half-time clutching a hamstring.

The other two Spanish sides face their Champions League clashes on Wednesday. Valencia host BATE in what will probably be a 3-0 win with goals from Jonas and Tino Costa, while Best-Ever Barcelona are in Scotland to face Celtic.

Among the traveling party is a certain Leo Messi, desperate to score not just to lead his side to victory, etc, but also to celebrate the birth of his son Thiago last Friday. LLL will not be impressed if said hypothetical (but hardly unlikely) goal is celebrated with a thumb-suck, cradle-rock, or dummy-chew, as the Barcelona press are suggesting.

Indeed, in case hard-of-thinking supporters were wondering what the third of those options may look like, Wednesday’s edition of Sport have been happy to concoct an image of it for their front cover, ahead of what Tito Vilanova claims is his team’s “most important game left in 2012.” Quite the salesman.

NEWS FEATURE Barcelona almost there despite makeshift defence

La Review: Terrific Trio flop, but Barcelona keep it up

2012-11-05T14:17:00Z

RESULTS Sat 3 Nov Málaga 1-2 Rayo Vallecano, Barcelona 3-1 Celta de Vigo, Real Madrid 4-0 Real Zaragoza, Valencia 2-0 Atlético Madrid Sun 4 Nov Real Sociedad 0-1 Espanyol, Deportivo La Coruña 1-0 Mallorca, Osasuna 0-1 Real Valladolid, Granada 1-2 Athletic Club, Sevilla 0-0 Levante Mon 5 Nov Getafe v Real Betis 21.30

GOOD DAY

Tito Vilanova
The Barça boss has led his team to the best domestic start in the Catalan club’s history. Mad as bats, really, as this has been achieved without most of the team’s first-choice defence being present and correct – even when they are playing – and by living life a little on the edge.

This theme was encapsulated in a chaotic first half against Celta Vigo: both teams looked like they could score with every chance they had. Barça calmed things down a little in the second half and came away with a 3-1 win, a victory that helped along the way on the hour mark by an incredibly offside goal from Jordi Alba to finish off the plucky visitors for good.

Real Madrid
Seated at the Bernabeu on Saturday, LLL could have sworn that the crowd hushed and settled themselves into stupefied silence before the start of the second half of Saturday’s win at Zaragoza, like a well-behaved theatre audience. “Four goals, three points and little excitement,” was Marca’s pretty accurate assessment of the clash which, like the Celta game a fortnight ago, won’t live long in the memory. José Mourinho rather neatly summed up how his team are playing at the moment: “The team are doing ok, could be better.”

Levante
Probably not everyone’s cup of tea to watch – with their tactics of ceding possession, parking a fleet of ageing buses at the back, and whacking hopeful balls up to Obafemi Martins – but it’s very effective approach indeed for the Valencia-based side. Levante had just 30% of the possession, two corners and one shot on target during Sunday’s goalless encounter at Sevilla. But the performance – and some wobbly finishing up front for the opposition – gave Levante one point and sees the team holding ground in the European places and four league games unbeaten.

Patrick Ebert
The German's beautifully-placed chip successfully completed a breakaway attack at Osasuna, giving Valladolid victory and lifting them to eighth place having quietly gone about a very successful no-alarms-and-no-surprises start to the season. “A draw would have been fair, but we scored on one counter-attack. In football there’s no justice,” said an empathetic Valladolid boss Miroslav Djukic.

Mauricio Pellegrino
It’s fair to say that Valencia really, really, really needed the 2-0 win over Atlético. Anything else could have seen handkerchief-waving hell in Mestalla stands stuffed with supporters calling for the manager’s head. However, the victory was a close-run thing after a gloriously dirty match containing more stamps than a post office; Valencia only sealed the deal in the final seconds of the encounter with Nelson Valdez scoring the second goal of the night, with the first being an absolute whopper from Roberto Soldado.

Piti
Rayo’s brace-bagger in the eyebrow-raising 2-1 victory at Málaga has been head and shoulders above everyone else in the Vallecan side this season. “We need to remain a very humble team that try to play good football when we can,” explained Rayo boss Paco Jémez, who watched the match suspended in the stands. And not in the ‘hanging on strings’ sense, either.

Ariz Aduriz
With Fernando Llorente still frozen out of the Athletic Bilbao starting line-up by the barking mad Marcelo Bielsa, it’s been up to Aduriz to carry the goalscoring can – and it’s something that he’s been achieving rather well. The Basque forward scored his third brace in la Liga this season with a double at Granada, to make it a very impressive eight goals in 10 rounds.

Deportivo
The 1-0 win over Mallorca sounds a small result, but it’s a big win for Deportivo who had failed to pick up three points since the first round of the season.

Espanyol
A side beginning to dig their way out of trouble, if still stuck in the relegation zone, despite a 1-0 win at Real Sociedad. The victory was Espanyol’s second win of the season – and perhaps more importantly, considering the strike-force isn’t working so well, made it two consecutive clean sheets in la Liga.

BAD DAY

Leo Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo, Radamel Falcao
Not a single goal from this trio this weekend. Overrated. All of them.

Atlético Madrid
It’s taken until the beginning of November for Atlético Madrid to end up in the ‘bad day’ section of the blog, which is a minor miracle in itself. So many runs ended in the 2-0 defeat in Mestalla: 13 victories in a row in all competitions, 23 games unbeaten, eight straight wins in la Liga. But the main point to make is that despite this setback, this new, solid version of Atlético is likely to bounce back very quickly. Especially since the next league encounter is the visit of bottom-of-the-table Osasuna.

Málaga
A bit of an upset to say the least for Málaga, losing 2-1 at home to Rayo Vallecano, who are not that good really. The big question is whether this was just a bad day at the office for the southern side, or if it has something to do with the owners breaking a promise during the week on when delayed payments would be paid to the players. Manuel Pellegrini suggests that may possibly be the case. “I’m not looking for excuses, but it was a bit of a chaotic week in every aspect and this could be seen out on the pitch,” said the Málaga boss after the team’s second league defeat of the season.

Sevilla
A horrible run for Sevilla continues with a goalless draw at home to Levante – the most recent part of a run that sees Míchel’s men having won just the single game from five. No progress has been made at all this season by Sevilla, a team who have the same number of points at the same stage as the past campaign, something that the home fans have noted. “The atmosphere that exists in the Sánchez Pizjuán is not comfortable for the players,” was the recognition from Míchel after boos from the stands where just 26,000 came out to see the game.

Mallorca
A season that started so brightly for Mallorca has now gone horribly wrong for the Balearic team, with Sunday’s 1-0 defeat at Deportivo being the side’s fifth straight loss. “We need to change this run as soon as possible,” said a concerned Joaquín Caparrós. “Although it’s difficult, we’ll try against Barcelona,” said the Mallorca boss on his team’s next league game and sixth consecutive defeat.

Philippe Montanier
A home defeat to Espanyol made it four games without a win and gave sections of la Real’s home support the hump, it would appear, with calls for the firing of the French boss.

Granada
Three defeats in a row in la Liga, the latest being a home setback against Athletic Bilbao, sends Granada into the bottom three. LLL isn't sure that the Andalusian side are ever going to get out of it.

Osasuna
Bof! A knockout counter-attack goal from Valladolid saw three points lost for Osasuna when at least one was deserved from the game. Osasuna’s problems still lie with goalscoring. Eight have been knocked up in 10 games, but four of those arrived in one match, the Pamplona side’s only win of the season so far.

La Preview: Málaga still missing money, while Mourinho carries on moaning

2012-11-02T11:25:00Z

Saturday

Málaga (3rd) v Rayo Vallecano (15th) - 16.00 (all kick-offs local time)

It's quite incredible to think that, despite the brilliant performance of the Málaga players in la Primera and the Champions League this season, the players are still being diddled with their money. Over the summer, a deal was struck where 70% of what was owed to the squad (around €8 million) would be paid by November 1. That would prevent the players making legal claims against the club which would cause a host of issues with UEFA and the Spanish FA. But that day has passed with the debts reportedly still outstanding. "We'll talk about the topic of payments on Friday," promised a concerned Manuel Pellegrini after the 4-3 away win in the Copa del Rey at Cacereño. The result leaves Malaga with just the single defeat in 15 competitive games, making them arguably the best-value squad in the world.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Celta Vigo (13th) - 18.00

It’s been a fairly peculiar week in the Catalan camp. Stories of Montoya nicking a taxi driver's wallet (denied strongly by the Barça defender), the continuing non-appearance of Gerard Piqué, an agent looking for a bit of attention with a tall story claiming that Pep Guardiola would have stayed if David Villa, Dani Alves, Gerard Piqué and Cesc Fabregas were sold over the summer, a perfunctory Copa del Rey win against Alavés and the unfortunate story of José Pinto being bonked on the head by a sandwich thrown from the crowd. If it was bread so crusty it could make your gums bleed, it could have been quite painful. However, the referee's report said that no harm was done - "medical attention was not required, he was able to carry on with the game." Phew.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (4th) v Real Zaragoza (9th) - 20.00

A 4-1 victory for Real Madrid against Alcoyano in the cup effectively makes the Bernabeu second leg utterly redundant - cheers at the Spanish FA no doubt. Six 'cantera' products featured in the game and there was a debut goal for the 17-year-old José Rodríguez. Surely, then, no reason for another moan from José Mourinho in his spat against the coach of the club's second team, Castilla? Of course there is. "He has potential and youth," said Mourinho, discussing central midfielder Rodriguez. "He is a possibility if he's playing because he is not playing much now," sniffed the Madrid boss in a highly uncoded message to his new arch-nemesis, Alberto Toril.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia (11th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 22.00

It’s up-and-down time for Valencia striker Jonas, who was substituted against Athletic Bilbao two rounds ago and subsequently fined for making rude gestures demonstrating exactly what he thought of the decision from Mauricio Pellegrino. However, Jonas was back against Llagostera and even managed to redeem himself a little by scoring. "I was wrong with the gesture and what happened," admitted the forward."These are tactics. But if I have to be on the bench then so be it, I'll show that I can play for Valencia." But should he fail to impress against an all-conquering Atlético Madrid in front of his own supporters on Saturday, Jonas will be wishing he never made the squad in the first place.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sunday

Real Sociedad (14th) v Espanyol (19th) - 12.00

Beep, beep, beep! Backtrack alert! "We know that the cup generates excitement," said a cheerful Espanyol boss Mauricio Pochettino before Thursday's 3-1 defeat to Sevilla which poured further misery on the Catalan club. Still, at least the Pericos lost to a half-decent Primera outfit. Weekend opponents Real Sociedad contrived to lose 2-0 away at second division Córdoba in perhaps the one interesting result of the night. "The responsibility for the defeat is everyone's," said manager Philippe Montanier. However, this being the Copa del Rey and two-legged, la Real get another go to make amends.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Deportivo (18th) v Mallorca (12th) - 16.00

A week ago, Rayo boss Paco Jémez complained about his team getting a hard time from referees this season. A few days later he became the seventh Primera manager to be sent off for challenging the judgement of the match officials, or perhaps just looking at one of them a bit funny. "This feels like a dictatorship," he fumed. Expect Deportivo's José Luis Oltra to be the next coach sent to the stands after commenting that "we managers feel a bit persecuted by the referees. They are paying closer attention to us, surely due to some directive from the Referees' Committee." One sign of a hand-flap and it'll be dismissal number eight for Oltra against Mallorca.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Osasuna (20th) v Real Valladolid (10th) - 17.50

Good news and bad news if you like your football northern, gritty and ever so 'real'. Osasuna lost out to Sporting in the first leg of their Copa del Rey match and failed to score once again in a 1-0 defeat, with José Luis Mendilibar complaining that his footballers lack a "hunger for goal." However, it's hip, hip hooray for the still-wonderful Sporting, who had a dreadful start to the campaign before appointing former Rayo boss, José Ramón Sandoval, who has put a spring back in the Asturian side's step.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Granada (17th) v Athletic Bilbao (16th) - 19.45

And so Athletic Bilbao's scintillating season continues with a goalless draw in the Copa del Rey against third-tier Eibar. To be honest it could have been a whole lot worse for Marcelo Bielsa's Basque strugglers. While the team may be floundering in their football, their Argentine coach continues his sparkling form in verbosity, so LLL will just let Bielsa be Bielsa in his post-match press conference. "I know it's difficult to accept, but in the dynamic of bad results the first step in any recovery is to perform with humility. It doesn't sound exaggerated to not be especially disappointed with a draw with Eibar."
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sevilla (7th) v Levante (6th) - 21.30

Levante lost to lower league Melilla, but ‘so flippin' what?!’ says LLL. Juan Ignacio Martínez's men are moving strongly in sixth place, and lie second in their Europa League group. However, with the cheapest season ticket for all three competitions just €160, wouldn’t a cup run be marvellous value for money?
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Getafe (8th) v Betis (5th) - 21.30

As not an awful lot happens in Getafe's world aside from the crowd reaching four figures from time to time, talk at the Coliseum continues to centre around the team’s strike problems. "We have a lot of players that can score six goals, but none that can score 15," complained Getafe boss Luis García last weekend, before his team beat Athletic Bilbao 2-1. Lo and behold, a forward got on the scoresheet for the first time in the shape of Álvaro Vasquez.

Another striker looking for his chance is Adrían Colunga, not exactly in García's good books last season and set to stay that way after a little bit of a strop this week. Colunga has made just two starts in la Liga this season and says that anyone who his happy on the bench "doesn't deserve to play football." It’s a comment that brought about a little sob from Kaká. "I am self-critical but I think that I have performed well. I've made two assists and this counts in football."
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mourinho finds a new nemesis, very close to home

2012-10-31T14:49:00Z

Without his favourite playmate and wrestle-buddy Pep Guardiola, José Mourinho has cut a bit of a gloomy figure this season. OK, even gloomier than usual.

Bickering with the press no longer gives the Portuguese the same spacedust-in-the-mouth buzz, UEFA don’t answer back to his name-calling and an ongoing sulky feud with Iker Casillas and Sergio Ramos is always going to be a bruising battle the Madrid manager will lose with the fans.

Happily, Mourinho has found a new arch-nemesis to spar with – and to find him, he only had to stick his neck out of his training ground office door. Alberto Toril – the fearsome figure of the manager of Madrid’s second side, Castilla – is a bit of a rising star at the club's Valdebebas training complex: he recently guided Castilla out of Spanish football's third tier, the realm of small clubs' second strings, and into the second alongside clubs the size of Sporting Gijon, Villarreal and Racing Santander.

However, tension has been developing between the two managers over Mourinho’s continuing habit of overlooking the youth team for options – most recently evident in the selection of Michael Essien at left-back during an injury crisis which cost Madrid the services of Marcelo, Fabio Coentrao and Alvaro Arbeloa.

There had been talk of elevating a Castilla centre-back called Nacho who can also play full-back, but Mourinho clearly disagreed with the concept in matches against Celta Vigo and Borussia Dortmund, sniffing that it is impossible to play two roles when developing as a player. Toril responded by claiming that Nacho is perfectly fine in both spots.

Mou considers deploying the "left back on the training ground" joke

This simmering cauldron sort of spurted in Tuesday’s press conference ahead of the Copa Del Rey match against Alcoyano, with Mourinho unceremoniously predicting that most of the current Castilla side won’t brave the bright lights at the Bernabeu, unless they come back playing for Getafe: “If a footballer who is 23, 24 or 25 has not reached a high enough level to be in Madrid’s first team, he’s not going to get there at 26, 27 or 28.”

The topic covers a common and heated theme in Madrid on why more youth team players don’t make it to the first team and are forced to leave the club. It’s a topic too titanic to cover here, but Mourinho partly blames Toril's tactics. “There are footballers with Castilla who play in positions that don’t exist in the first team. We have no ‘nine-and-a-half' where Jesé plays. We have the seven, the eight, the nine, the 10 and the 11.”

For good measure, Mourinho then went on to list a long line of failures in the recent history of Madrid’s youth system by reeling off players such as Francisco Pavón and Raúl Bravo. “I’ve not broken a fixed dynamic,” he said, not unreasonably.

This story has now become the main event ahead of Wednesday’s cup game, with Marca’s front cover yelling about “dynamite against the cantera” and AS fretting over “Mou-Toril, an asymmetric war,” with the paper’s editor writing of “Mourinho’s obscene search for total control” of Real Madrid in picking a fight with one of the club’s coaching team, and an important one at that.

A couple of those footballers not yet at Mourinho’s age cut-off point will be expected to play alongside Karim Benzema and Kaká against Alcoyano, a third-tier side based not far from Alicante. Barcelona brought out their big guns in Tuesday’s clash against Alavés, ensuring one-way traffic and goals from David Villa, Andrés Iniesta and Sergio Busquets in a 3-0 win. Valencia came away with a very healing 2-0 win at the rain-swept training pitch that Llagoste call home, giving Mauricio Pellegrino just a tiny bit of breathing space ahead of Saturday’s visit of Atlético Madrid.

Wednesday’s Copa del Rey Fixtures
Almería v Celta Vigo
Alcoyano v Real Madrid
Cacereño v Málaga
Jaén v Atlético Madrid
Las Palmas v Rayo Vallecano
Zaragoza v Granada

Can Valencia survive the Copa del Rey curse?

2012-10-30T11:10:00Z

The serious side of the Copa del Rey kicks off on Tuesday night, but there will be disappointment for anyone expecting La Liga Loca's annual rant about how it's a useless competition rigged to help the big teams. (No lawyers required: it actually is loaded in favour of clubs in European competition, who are deliberately drawn against the weakest teams at this stage.)

The blog still feels the same way about the whole sorry affair, which has been stripped of every chance to be exciting and unpredictable, but it has decided to take some positives from the cup. To be fair, those small positives are a little bit mean-spirited as they revolve around people losing their jobs, so LLL must admit that it is feeling a little bit ashamed of itself.

The main feature of the early stages of the Copa del Rey is that if you are a big team, life is made so swimmingly pleasant by the Spanish FA that you must be truly incompetent to get yourself knocked out before the contest has warmed up. Real Madrid's defeat to Alcorcón three years ago was the beginning of the end for Manuel Pellegrini, although that was always on the cards with The Powers That Be wanting José Mourinho moved in as soon as possible, which lead to Marca being very unpleasant indeed to the poor Chilean for the rest of that campaign.

But let’s face it, things must be bad if you are unable to beat lower-league opposition in the country’s only cup competition over two legs. In the last 32, where we are now, the smaller sides even have to play their first game at home, so any upset should be easily rectified in the big club's bear-pit.

Last season saw quite the cull of coaches in la Primera for sides that were struggling anyway. Villarreal's loss to Mirandés led to the firing of Juan Carlos Garrido, the appointment of Miguel Angel Lotina and the side’s inevitable relegation. Alcorcón saw off Zaragoza, which produced the departure of Javier Aguirre.

The biggest shake-up of all was Atlético Madrid contriving to lose to Albacete in both legs which was the tipping point for the firing of Gregorio Manzano and the arrival of Diego Simeone which has worked out rather well. So a terrible performance over two legs in the cup can lead to very good things. Or something very bad indeed, as with poor old Villarreal.

Big cup: Li'l Xavi gets last year's trophy, apparently from Mitt Romney

Barcelona boss Tito Vilanova is probably reasonably safe no matter what happens in the two legs against Alavés, whose manager Natxo González claims that “we have to go out and compete without fear: when you are afraid of losing then you never win.” It’s the kind of admirable philosophy that worked so well for Rayo Vallecano in Saturday's 5-0 loss to the Catalan club, who are set to give their third-tier opponents a chance by fielding Marc Bartra and Alex Song at the back.

Extremely troubled Valencia boss Mauricio Pellegrino will be bricking himself on the bench against Catalan side Llagostera, who are ninth in group three of the Segunda B division but have an artificial pitch 10 metres shorter on both sides than Mestalla. “They have weapons to create problems,” warned a spooked Pellegrino, who must be thrilled by the prospect of a defeat and having to chase a deficit in front of the compassionate Mestalla fans at the end of November – if he's still around at that stage.

Aside from these two matches, the rest of the games are taking place on Wednesday and Thursday – the latter being a bank holiday in Spain, what with almost two weeks having passed since the country’s last one. And speaking of not bothering going into work, Pellegrino is just the first of a number of Primera coaches who may be forced to curse this season’s Copa del Rey.

Good Day, Bad Day: Flying Fabregas, Magic Martins and Brilliant Barça

2012-10-29T12:56:00Z

RESULTS Sat 27 Oct Espanyol 0-0 Malaga, Real Betis 1-0 Valencia, Celta Vigo 1-1 Deportivo, Rao Vallecano 0-5 Barcelona Sun 28 Oct Real Zaragoza 2-1 Sevilla, Levante 3-1 Granda, Athletic Club 1-2 Getafe, Atletico Madrid 3-1 Osasuna, Mallorca 0-5 Real Madrid

Cesc Fabregas
The 25-year-old began the campaign as a bit of whiner about not being able to find his true path at the Camp Nou since leaving Arsenal, but has since started all nine of Barcelona’s Liga matches this season, producing seven assists along the way. Against Rayo Vallecano, the former Gunner man was a pure box-to-box force; protecting Barça's back four, while robbing the ball in midfield and probing up front. All of this meant that Cesc was able to lead his team to a 5-0 win and keep warm for good measure, something a disastrously-dressed La Liga Loca didn't manage to do while sitting in the stands for the 10pm kick-off at possibly the most exposed point in Madrid.

Málaga, Espanyol
If LLL was going to take a well-deserved nap through any game this weekend, this encounter was a good choice. In the end not an enormous amount happened at all; a goalless draw in Cornella and 30 minutes of dreamy sleep for the blog. Nevertheless, both teams can take something from the result. For Espanyol it was simply not losing the game and achieving a first clean sheet of the season. "We are getting our self-confidence back," said manager Mauricio Pochettino.

Málaga were able to rest golden-oldies Javier Saviola and Joaquín from the starting line-up and picked up a handy away point. That ensured Manuel Pellegrini's side maintained a single defeat in 14 Liga and Champions League matches, the only blot on the copy book being a very late loss to Atlético Madrid. "A fair result in a tight game," declared the Chilean.

Cristiano Ronaldo
A spectacularly bad prediction from LLL saw the blog forecasting two dropped points for the league champions against Mallorca, a side that have proved thorny under Joaquín Caparrós. But Cristiano Ronaldo proved this column wrong in some style with a brace to become the seventh-highest goalscorer for Real Madrid with 123 goals in 110 games. The Portuguese is now equal with the half-decent Emilio Butragueño, who knocked in 123 in 341 matches.

Salva Sevilla
It’s perhaps the best-ever name for a footballer who happens to play for the rivals of his name. Betis’ Sevilla made the difference in an edgy 1-0 win over Valencia that owed itself a little to Roberto Soldado enjoying the 'miss' side of his hit-and-miss tendencies and some solid saves from third-choice keeper, Adrián. Betis keep up their fine start to the season with manager, Pepe Mel, boasting that "even Madrid and Barcelona will have suffer to win here in Villamarín.” With all deserved respect, though, LLL would beg to differ with Betis having shipped six goals against Rayo Vallecano and Atlético Madrid in their Seville home.

Atlético Madrid
As Osasuna manager José Luis Mendilibar noted, Atlético Madrid are doing so well this season as they are able to take on the form of a "small team" and grind out results against the likes of his own side even when not playing especially brilliantly. This crazy campaign carries on with Atlético still side-by-side with Barcelona at the top of the table after a 3-1 win against La Liga's bottom-of-the-table team.

Obafemi Martins
Another remarkable goalscoring display from the Nigerian who scored a brace to give Levante a 3-1 win over Granada. It was the team's third victory on the trot to leave them in the Europa League spots. Wonderful stuff.

Álvaro Vásquez
The Getafe player not only scored his side's winner at Athletic in San Mamés but also became the club's first striker to find the back of the net this season.

Helder Postiga
The Real Zaragoza striker has four league goals in four games this season. Zaragoza have won all four of them too, the latest being Sunday’s 2-1 win over Sevilla. Four-some.

Juan Carlos Valeron
A lovely bit of fleet-footedness from the old-timer after assisting Juan Domínguez for Deportivo's equaliser in a sprightly Galician derby to end a run of four straight defeats. But the team still haven't won since the first game of the campaign, so affairs in La Coruña are still pretty bad.

Bad Day

Alexis Sánchez
How much?

Sevilla
Still snugglier than a fabric-softener-soaked teddy bear on their travels. The lame 2-1 defeat to Zaragoza on Sunday sees the Andalusians with just the one away victory in five - and that came at Deportivo, so hardly stunning. Michel's men have now lost three from four leaving the jury out on whether the lively displays against Real Madrid and Barcelona were one-offs or signs of greater things to come. It looks like the latter at the moment, but don’t worry because the Sevilla manager can offer an explanation for the recent poor run of form. Football is being "too hard" on his players, he says. Oh, he can’t.

Valencia
After a teeny, tiny revival which saw victories against Athletic Bilbao and BATE, Valencia are back to a sorry start with a defeat to Betis which sees the men from the Mestalla with just the single point from 15 on their travels - in the opening match at the Bernabeu. "The issue wasn't a physical one for the team," revealed Mauricio Pellegrino, refusing to blame the midweek Belarus trip, "but more to do with attitude."

Mallorca
The 5-0 thrashing by Real Madrid, who didn't really need to move into third gear, saw a fourth consecutive defeat for the Ballearic side who lacked anything resembling intensity. "We are not this team," admitted Joaquín Caparrós, "football is about the collective and we weren't a team."

Rayo Vallecano
This sounds a bit odd, but it's rare to see a huge disparity between a great team and a distinctly average one in a top-flight match these days. Of course thrashings take place but these can sometimes be explained by flukey levels of efficiency, poor tactics from the losing side or simply a bad day at the office, as suffered by Mallorca against Real Madrid. But although Rayo genuinely did what they could in the game and gave it all their all against Barça, they lost due to the simple matter that Barcelona are about a hundred times better, as they should be with a budget about a hundred times bigger. At least the 5-0 defeat wasn't as bad as the seven-goal loss last time around.

Athletic Bilbao
The players seemed snarky and bad tempered, every Getafe ball into the box caused chaos and consternation - even throw-ins spread panic - and the fans seem completely fed up. Still, Marcelo Bielsa's wonderful way of words seems to be the only thing functioning properly at San Mamés at the moment. "Our rival's attack was not sufficiently difficult to concede these goals," noted the Athletic boss. "We are in a difficult position but it doesn't correspond with the resources in human capital and institutional size that the club has." LLL could listen to El Loco all day long. The trouble is that the opportunities to do so may be running out.

La Preview: Pellegrini pokes at Mourinho, while Bielsa stays positive

2012-10-26T10:24:00Z

Saturday

Espanyol (19th) v Málaga (3rd) - 16.00 (all kick-offs local time)
Málaga boss Manuel Pellegrini has largely kept a dignified silence over his one season spell as Real Madrid manager, aside from pointing out with some justification that having Arjen Robben and Wesley Sneijder sold from under his nose just before the season’s start wasn’t the best preparation for the campaign.
However, the Chilean has been a little more open of late, and told Gazzetta dello Sport that he wasn’t at one with José Mourinho’s way of doing business at the Santiago Bernabeu - revenge, perhaps, for the Portuguese snooty-pants once sniffing that he would never manage a club like Málaga.
Pellegrini told the paper that he “didn’t like resultist” managers and that he believed “the concepts of spectacle and creation are fundamental".
The Málaga man also mused that "the constructive side of the game is very ahead of the destructive,” words that may well be wafted in Mourinho’s nose ahead of Madrid’s Mallorca clash on Sunday.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Betis (6th) v Valencia (9th) - 18.00
The king of goal clusters, Roberto Soldado, was back in action on Wednesday when he scored all three of Valencia’s strikes in a 3-0 win over BATE - his 10th hat-trick as a professional. “I don’t know why (I score so many), perhaps when you score a goal, it gives you a big lift and motivates you more.” It certainly seems to work for the former Real Madrid and Getafe man, who tends to score a lot in a very short space of time and then go for long periods offering up diddly-squat.
The treble against BATE also had extra significance for Soldado, as it sees the striker becoming Valencia’s top scorer in the Champions League with an admittedly remarkable 14 goals in 16 games in the competition.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Celta Vigo (13th) v Deportivo (18th) - 20.00
It’s derby day in Galicia when the rain will no doubt crash down on teams who have not played each other for...er...one season, as both new boys were in la Segunda together last year. Deportivo have managed to lose a spectacular four league games in a row, conceding 14 goals in the process. No wonder their striker, Riki!!! claims “we have to win, yes or yes.”
On the opposite side of the fish-scented divide, Celta forward Iago Aspas fancies his own side to come away with the victory. “We’re at home, in front of our own fans, so at the moment I think we are favourites.” That was as controversial as it got for the Celta man, who got into some trouble last year for admitting that he celebrated a dark moment from a former derby - Vagner booting Tristan square in the shin - as it if were a goal.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Rayo Vallecano (12th) v Barcelona (1st) - 22.00
If there’s one sniff of a hint of a suggestion of a dive in the box from Barcelona in Vallecas on Saturday night, then the home team won’t be happy bunnies at all. If it then results in a red card and a penalty, things could get a very ugly indeed. Rayo are rather miffed that five of their eight league games so far have resulted in reds or penalties against the Madrid side. The most recent dismissal was Labaka’s in the 3-2 defeat to Espanyol, a decision that sent manager Paco Jemez, doolally. “We are humble, but not idiots,” fumed the Rayo boss. Even worse for Rayo, the team have been on the receiving end of 32 yellow cards in their eight matches in la Liga, with just 16 handed out to the opposition.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sunday

Zaragoza (14th) v Sevilla (5th) - 12.00
Merely raise an eyebrow at a referee or his assistant these days in Spain and you’re likely to feel the wrath of the man in the middle. Zaragoza's Manolo Jiménez became the sixth Primera boss to be sent off for daring to “make a clear protest to the referee or assistant,” something clearly forbidden in Spain. Jiménez is in very good company though, with the managers of Barcelona, Celta Vigo, Sevilla, Espanyol and Valladolid all having had to watch games from the stands this season, due to la Primera’s prickly officialdom.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Levante (7th) v Granada (16th) - 16.00
Now, LLL imagines quite a few readers were wondering about the relationship between Granada and the local council, who own the club’s stadium. Until this Tuesday, the answer would have been ‘not well at all’, with a dispute over the running costs being charged to Granada which was felt to be a little steep. Indeed, Granada were even threatening to play their games elsewhere, such was the size of the huff, but a deal has now been struck. Nobody’s actually reading this are they? (le sigh)
LLL Prediction - Home win

Athletic Bilbao (17th) v Getafe (11th) - 17.50
Another day, another defeat for Athletic, who fell to a late goal and lost out 2-1 to Lyon in France-land. This sees the Basques performing just as badly in Europe as in la Primera, with just the single point being picked up by the Man City of Spain. It’s not a great performance all round as Marcelo Bielsa admits in his own wonderful and very literal style. “If you only win one point from nine, then the situation cannot be described with optimism. But I understand that three wins would put us through and I will never give up on the chances whilst they are still there.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Osasuna (20th) - 19.45
Swoon, swoon, swoon. That’s the best description for the way LLL is feeling about Diego Simeone at the moment. The 2-1 victory over Académica in the Europa League on Thursday night sees 16 consecutive wins in Europe for the Rojiblancos and 21 in total without defeat. Not that the Atlético boss cares a jot. Grr. “Numbers are for history and journalists. We live for tomorrow. Tomorrow is Osasuna.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Mallorca (8th) v Real Madrid (4th) - 21.30
With all three first teamers capable of playing at left-back out injured, all the talk in Mordor last week was who José Mourinho would pick in that position. Would it be ‘cantera’ youth scheme Castilla options, Nacho or Jorge Casado? Nope. Michael Essien, the Portuguese’s tried and tested favourite brought in on loan from Chelsea. And to be fair, LLL can’t really fault the decision, despite the fact that it has raised some heckles in the Madrid press from those who think youth should be given a chance. Bernardo Schuster gets it though, someone who has parked his booty on the hot Bernabeu bench. “The cantera business is a lie. At Madrid you have to win, if you don’t win you’re not worth anything,” recalled the German.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Monday

Valladolid (10th) v Real Sociedad (15th) - 21.30
Moan, moan, moan. That’s all LLL can hear from Valladolid’s direction, with their fancy-dan claims that they’d like to play their games on a weekend, and at a reasonable time to boot. Valladolid are now facing their fourth Monday night match in nine, two more than anyone else has had to endure. Club president, Carlos Suarez blames the Spanish League for falling too much under the thrall of the powers-that-be in the TV world. “They aren’t working and defender their clubs who they are putting in the hands of the TV channels. They need to work a bit more and talk less.” And with that final piece of advice Suárez inadvertently discovered Spain’s way out of their recession, for good measure.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Barça’s Willy Wonka and Málaga’s VIP visitor

2012-10-24T09:27:00Z

Well, that’s decision sorted, then. Just a time machine and perhaps Richard Pryor as a drinking buddy required to put it all in place.

In La Liga Loca’s Tito Vilanova movie-of-the-week biopic, the current Barcelona boss is going to be played by Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka – a childlike smile with a hint of threat behind it, as the carefree creator watches the Oompa-Loompa-inspired madness out on the pitch. It will end with Tito teaming up with Pep and holding the world to ransom with a death ray in 28 years' time, cackling “Before, they said we were boring. We’re not now!” with a twinkle in the eye Mourinho didn't poke.

Adding to the last-ditch efforts against Granada and Sevilla and last weekend's lunacy against Deportivo, Barça once again left it incredibly late, beating Celtic in the 93rd minute – and further shredding the nerves of the Catalan collective who are having to deal with the bipolar notion that Barcelona have won 10 out of 11 Primera and Champions League games without being that good.

However, others won’t hear of such talk, praising their team's never-say-die attitude and self-made luck. Whilst the Scottish club may been hailed as brave in some quarters – parts of Scotland, probably – Sport's Josep Maria Casanovas won’t have a word of it. “Celtic paid very dearly for their cowardliness,” writes the culé columnist, neatly forgetting that Celtic came very close to picking up a point with a strong defensive performance despite apparently being big girl’s blouses.

"Smile, we're on someone's iPad"

The front page of Mundo Deportivo basks in the “Happy Ending” for Barcelona in the 2-1 win, with the paper’s director Santi Nolla, whose pen-pic resembles a 1960s chain-smoking BBC newsreader, joking that “from the first match of the season, Barça fans have known that games now last 94 minutes and you have to hang on until the last moment.”

Valencia had to travel to one of the world's last loon-bag countries for a bit of piece and quiet, beating Belarusians BATE Borisov 3-0 with a hat-trick from Roberto Soldado (who still seems to be following a score-100-goals-in-10-games-then-none-in-100 pattern). The win puts the Mestalla men top of the table, albeit equal on points with BATE and Bayern Munich. “The team needed that and so did I,” admitted the Spanish striker.

Wednesday sees two more Champions League matches featuring la Liga’s finest four. Málaga know they have a whopper of a match on their hands, what with Milan coming to town and tickets being sold out for decades and all that. But it's also a big night because the club’s owner Abdullah bin Nasser Al-Thani will be at the stadium for the first time since May and the big summer kerfuffle when the decision was made to cut off the funding to the transfer kitty. Quite wisely based on the current form of the Italian club, Milan manager Massimo Allegri has claimed that “we will have to have a great match to be able to win.”

The same could be said of Real Madrid, who have the remarkably awful record of one win in 23 European games on German soil. José Mourinho will be looking to double that against Borussia Dortmund with a confident Marca yelling that “this curse must end!” Previously, LLL would have thought that a draw would be on the cards and a win would be highly unlikely, but seeing that this is now a surreal world where Barça have become Atlético Madrid in their anarchy and the blog is having to explain the concept of Jimmy Savile to curious Spaniards, anything could happen. Even a Real Madrid victory on German soil.

Good Day, Bad Day: Barmy Barça, Rubbish Ronaldo and Amazing Atlético

2012-10-22T11:15:00Z

RESULTS Sat 20 Oct Deportivo 4-5 Barcelona, Valencia 3-2 Athletic Bilbao, Real Madrid 2-0 Celta Vigo, Malaga 2-1 Valladolid Sun 21 Oct Real Sociedad 0-1 Atletico Madrid, Osasuna 0-0 Real Betis, Granada 1-2 Zaragoza, Espanyol 3-2 Rayo Vallecano, Getafe 0-1 Levante.

Good Day

Barcelona
The glass half empty section of Barça’s support will bemoan the four goals conceded to a previously terrible Deportivo - three of which came before the Catalan collective went down to ten men - which leave the Catalan club having shipped 11 this season, as many as bottom club Osasuna. And that really can’t be good.
Then again, a more positive approach from the culé collective will note that just one of those four goals from Saturday’s 5-4 victory came from open play (dodgy pen, great free-kick, own goal for the others) and that Barcelona were pretty spectacular in the opening part of Saturday’s 5-4 win. LLL’s advise is not to spend too much time analysing what’s going on with the league leaders these days but simply hug the chaos tightly and hope it never goes away.

Leo Messi
A footballer who produced three more goals to make it 11 in la Liga this season, but who must have been looking around and trying to comprehend the carnage during Barcelona’s 5-4 victory over Deportivo. May soon be craving a quieter life at Getafe if this season continues in the same vein for the Catalan club, especially as the Argentinean is on the brink of becoming a father.

Atlético Madrid
And so the Rojiblancos’ incredible campaign keeps on going with a third last-minute victory in the past three matches in la Liga and Europe. Atlético were by no means brilliant against la Real, a team who had won all of their home games so far this season, and a point looked like being a fine return from the game - a return that the Rojiblancos would have gladly taken last season for example. But this is the new improved version and Atlético picked up yet another victory with Falcao scoring from a direct free kick in the last minute of normal time. Magic stuff.

Falcao
The Colombian has now scored in ten consecutive games and has even added free-kicks to his arsenal. “He’s been practicing for a while,” noted team-mate, Adrián.

Joaquín
The Malaga winger is one of the chirpiest footballers on the planet when he's a happy camper, so it’s a fluffy feeling indeed to see Joaquín enjoying his football so much these days. With the departure of the equally-chippy Santi Cazorla, LLL senses the über-positive side of Joaquín’s character was required in order to get his teammates through some difficult times over the summer. Now the season is underway, it’s Joaquín the fantastic footballer that has taken over, with the former Valencia man scoring the side’s winner after earlier missing a penalty in a 2-1 victory over Valladolid in a game that Manuel Pellegrini summarised where “we kept our concentration but we weren’t brilliant.”

Real Madrid
“Efficient” trumped AS. “A normal day at the office,” yawned Marca’s match report on the 2-0 win over Celta Vigo in a game LLL couldn’t describe any better, so won’t. After all, 90 minutes of the blog’s life has already vanished watching the match.

Michael Essien
Limited opponents and all that, but it was still an admirable performance at left-back for the on-loan Chelsea man, who was the natural born filler for the injured Marcelo, Fabio Coentrao and Alvaro Arbeloa. Essien won the most balls for Real Madrid and put in a delightful cross for Cristiano Ronaldo that the Portuguese in a very wasteful mood somehow failed to covert. Yet Marca were not overly impressed, giving Essien a rating of just 6.5 and noting that “not Marcelo, let’s be clear, but nor is he Coentrao.” Someone’s going to find their security pass not working on Monday morning.

Levante
A classic smash-and-grab from Levante helped the Valencia-based side earn back-to-back wins and sixth spot after eight games. The victory in the derby a fortnight back came from a hoofed long ball from Gustavo Munúa, and it was a repeat performance in Sunday's 1-0 victory over Getafe in the Coliseum, with Míchel whacking home the headed-down ball from some 30 yards.

Mauricio Pellegrino
The Valencia coach’s special parts were lying on football’s chopping board, with only two minutes left of his team’s clash with Athletic Bilbao. Two late goals bought the Argentinean some time in the end in the 3-2 win, but it can only be temporary for a boss who's grip on his job will have weakened even further, with calls from the eternally prissy Valencia support calling for the resignation of the board.

Ever Banega
Back in action for Valencia after a length spell on the sidelines having been run over by his own car.

Espanyol
Merciful Zeus. That was close to being another disaster for Espanyol who were seconds from failing to win yet again. However, a powerful header from Stuani in injury time gave the Pericos their first victory in the season, but it was a close run thing in the 3-2 victory over Rayo. Second-from-bottom of the table, and likely to stay there for many weeks to come unless the defence improves considerably.

Bad Day

Cristiano Ronaldo
In the bad day section just for the novelty factor and tummy-tickling enjoyment of sticking the Real Madrid man where Riki and Javier Arizmendi normally reside. Missed two absolute sitters against Celta Vigo and far too many superfluous back-flips for the blog’s conservative football leanings.

Raúl Albiol
Three defenders down for Real Madrid and the Spanish international still can’t get a gig, with Raphael Varane being chosen at centre-back in place of the rejigged Sergio Ramos and a midfielder being plonked into the left-back position.

A significant chunk of Valencia fans
As Marca noted, in the space of just two minutes the Valencia supporters went from booing to cheering with their side 2-1 down with just two minutes of normal time remaining. Goals from Tino Costa and Nelson Valdez saw what LLL suspects is a significant barracking sector of the Mestalla support going home very disappointed indeed after a very late 3-2 victory over Athletic Bilbao.

Ander Herrera & Fernando Llorente
More trouble at t’mill with an apologetic Herrera saying sorry about a second half sending off from a retaliatory kick during the 3-2 defeat to Valencia. “I made an unforgivable mistake,” admitted the midfielder. Llorente didn’t get the chance to say anything at all with the striker remaining an unused substitute for mad Marcelo Bielsa.

Getafe
Another game and another day without goals for Getafe’s ineffective strikers.

Granada
“We were a team without a soul in the first half,” grumbled boss, Juan Antonio Anquela, after the 2-1 home defeat to Zaragoza. A situation that can’t be good at all, imagines LLL.

Osasuna
An experience just as depressing for those watching in the stands as those on the pitch. A goalless draw against Betis where all Osasuna could do was lump balls into the box from a variety of angles, but with no one on the other end of any of them - a familiar sight, this season. It’s a sad situation in Pamplona that leaves Osasuna at the bottom of the table.

La Preview: Pepe’s Secret Video, A Sulky Soldado and Sevilla’s Fearless Leader

2012-10-19T09:58:00Z

Saturday

Málaga (3rd) v Valladolid (8th) - 16.00 CEST
While the international break has afforded most of Málaga’s fairly stretched squad a nice rest ahead a fairly hectic period of league, cup and Champions League games, the club’s bosses have been pondering what to do with a certain soon-to-be-superstar footballer who is one ‘D’ away from being a great night out. Isco currently has a deal with Málaga that runs to 2016 with a buy-out clause of €21 million. Not long enough and certainly not a big enough clause for Málaga's liking, given that he's player every right-thinking big gun in Europe will be whacking each other with pillows to pick up over the summer.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (5th) v Celta Vigo (12th) - 18.00
La Liga is back and so, of course, is the kerfuffle over Pepe and whether or not the defender is a dirty player. It will be of no surprise to say that Real Madrid suggest ‘no’ and Tito Vilanova thinks ‘yes’. We're still waiting for Javi Casquero’s thoughts on the matter, though. The Barça boss suggested after the most recent Clásico clash that “they should put out a video of all of Pepe’s kicks,” after the Madrid man suggested that Andrés Iniesta was a diver.
According to Catalunya Radio, such a video was made by Barcelona during the reign of King Pep and is ready for release if necessary. LLL urges an immediate release of the footage and retaliation in kind from Real Madrid - José Pinto’s worst haircuts. Or is that taking things too far?
LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia (14th) v Athletic Bilbao (16th) - 20.00
Roberto Soldado received quite the wrap on the knuckles from Mauricio Pellegrino after the defeat to Levante a fortnight ago, with the Valencia boss castigating his player for letting his temper get the better of him in the local derby defeat. “The more you talk, the less you play,” warned the Argentinean, who revealed that things were so bad on the pitch with a sulky Soldado that “we were afraid we would end up with ten, so I send Nelson Valdez out to warm up.”
But Soldado responded in an adult, non stroppy manner by admitting that “the only people responsible (for a bad start) are the players. The team hasn’t shown half the football that it has.” Naturally, the striker then called Saturday’s game against equally beleaguered opponents in the shape of Athletic Bilbao, ‘a final’. And to be fair, it certainly could be in terms of Pellegrino’s perilous position at the club, supposes LLL.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Deportivo (18th) v Barcelona (1st) - 22.00
In an apparently money-spinning initiative, those egg heads at the Spanish FA had hoped to follow the Italian path and play the country’s annual Super Copa in China, with the result hopefully being lots of lots of cash in return. Well, that cunning plan looks like being shot down in flames with the two teams most likely to be participating in the match, year after year after year - Barcelona and Real Madrid - declining the offer in a meeting this week.
“We can’t imagine an official competition where our fans can’t attend,” declared Barça spokesperson, Toni Friexa.
In other news at the Catalan club, it seems that Barça may be dragged kicking and screaming towards lowering themselves to a midday kick-off, something has been previously opposed, apparently on the grounds that Sandro Rosell is not really a morning person. “This year we’ll play at 12.00, but I don’t like it, I’m not a fan of this time, but we’ll accept it,” advised the coffee-swigging Barça president, on route to buying ten alarm clocks to plant about his bedroom.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Sunday

Getafe (9th) v Levante (11th) (12.00)
Approaching the European places is quite an achievement for Getafe considering the Madrid side have got there without a single goal from their anointed goal-getters. Technically speaking, the team has five proper strikers in the squad (and Dani Güiza), but not one has managed to score one of the eight league goals knocked in by the team so far this season. Young Paco Alcácer, on loan from Valencia, is amongst this group of mis-firing forwards but says that big things can be expected from himself before the year is out. “It would be a good season if I score eight or nine goals,” announced the big-talking striker.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Espanyol (20th) v Rayo Vallecano (10th) (16.00)
Poor Mauricio Pochettino has has to suffer a fortnight stewing in his own juices, with the Pericos bottom-of-the-table and still without a win. However Espanyol really, really, really should beat a Rayo side that LLL watched two weeks ago and can best describe as ‘plucky but quite terrible’. “The only thing that can give us tranquility and confidence is a good game and three points,” admitted the club’s coach. LLL suspects they’ll do just that on Sunday. If not they are doomed, doomed, doomed.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Granada (15th) v Real Zaragoza (17th) (17.50)
A lazy LLL is just going to leave you with Granada player Youssef El Arabi's analysis of this game, as the blog doesn’t think it can add too much more. “Zaragoza is a good team and is a direct rival. We’ll try to do everything to win this game.” However, on a more interesting note, the Moroccan forward, who cost €5m over the summer, did respond to some boos from the direction of the Granada fans in the team’s last home game by promising that he’s “working a lot and giving everything to score goals so the team can win.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Osasuna (19th) v Betis (4th) (19.45)
There’s much ado about lively Betis midfielder, Beñat Etxebarría at the moment, with the Basque player called up to the Spain squad for the past two World Cup qualifying matches. Unfortunately for the Seville side all the ado is about when the hairy one will be leaving Betis. Club president, Miguel Guillén, is quite optimistic about the chances of Beñat staying by revealing that talks are afoot with the player to renew his contract. Unfortunately for the Betis boss, the ultimate decision on what happens to the footballer may lie with the team’s administrators - and that decision could well be a bad one.
“We don’t rule out the chance that Beñat could go in the winter market. We know that Beñat could earn more in other teams than Betis,” advised Bosch Valero, one of the Betis accountant overlords who also revealed that Wolfsburg had made a €10m offer for the midfielder over the summer.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Sociedad (13th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) (21.30)
Finding out what music being blasted through out-sized headphones makes a particular footballer tick whilst he gets on and off the team bus is always a curious business. Real Sociedad have poked their nose into the players’ tastes by allowing the footballers to choose a song that will be played out over the stadium PA if they score in la Anoeta.
The most likely tune to be heard is Torture Me by Red Hot Chili Peppers, the choice of striker, Imanol Agirretxe. Alberto de la Bella, the big wuss bag, has selected Rihanna’s We Found Love. But LLL imagines the entire stadium will be dreading a strike from defender Carlos Martínez with David Bisbal’s awful, awful, awful Ave María set to be blasted out if he should ever score a goal. Luckily that hasn’t happened since the 2007/08 campaign.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Monday

Sevilla (7th) v Mallorca (6th) (21.30)
LLL certainly wouldn’t like to be in the walking in expensive boots of José María del Nido, where life isn’t going particularly well for the Sevilla president. Last December, del Nido was sentenced to seven-and-a-half years in prison, having been found guilty of embezzlement for his part in a corruption ring in Marbella between 1999 and 2003. The Sevilla big-wig was also ordered to pay €2.7 million to the city’s town hall. However, the innocent-declaring del Nido is going through an appeals process and has yet to see a cell, and doesn’t expect to either. “I don’t have a plan B as I’m convinced plan A will go well,” said del Nido in AS on whether prison gives him the willies. “ I don’t know what fear is. When it happens I’ll describe it.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Could The Curse of Atlético be to blame for Spain’s French foul-up?

2012-10-17T12:31:00Z

Like a criminal mastermind who has grown tired of giving the hapless police the run-around and is looking to be banged to rights for once, Spain gave France enough chances in Atlético Madrid's Vicente Calderón to punish la Roja and make life a little more thrilling for Vicente Del Bosque’s men.

This desire to be caught and cuffed began over the summer in Poland and Ukraine, with performances consisting of the bare minimum effort required to beat their opponents, penalties and the refusal to field a proper striker despite having quite a few decent ones on the bench.

Two of these tactics were back in business on Tuesday night in the World Cup qualifier - Cesc Fabregas started up front and missed a penalty which could have sealed the victory. But Spain decided to make things easier still for their opponents - after all, the approach didn't do them any harm at Euro 2012, and left enough in the tank for even more long, money-spinning jaunts to Puerto Rico and the like for the Spanish FA.

Despite having a number of proper defenders available, Del Bosque opted to put Sergio Busquets in the back four, thus giving Xabi Alonso an awful lot to do. And when Alvaro Arbeloa picked up a knock, Juanfran - recently converted from Osasuna winger to Atlético fullback - was deployed, only to commit the error that eventually lead to France’s last gasp equaliser.

It was a series of self destructive moves that had you suspecting Dani Güiza and Riki would be called up for the next series of matches, just for a laugh. Even the supporters in the stadium played their part, giving the opposition extra motivation by doing a Mexican wave in the first half with the match about 50,000 miles away from being won.

Despite Vicente del Bosque’s plan working to perfection, the Spanish press are insistent that the dropped points are a very bad thing for Spain, who might end up forced into ‘doing a Portugal’ and going through the qualification play-offs in order to book their trip to Brazil. That’s certainly the fear at AS, whose headline suggests a victory in Paris when the two sides meet again in March is a must.

Marca are happy to blame the dropped points on the tactical decisions of Del Bosque and poor old Juanfran, who defended himself after the game by insisting he was “not a worse player after tonight.”

Over in the Catalan capital, Josep Maria Casanovas writing in Sport opines that “it doesn’t matter but it’s all a warning. When you don’t play with 100% motivation, when you want spectacle with the minimum of score-lines, when you apply the law of minimum effort, these things can happen.”

And so, Del Bosque will have a big grin hidden under his moustache, with the group suddenly interesting and....and....hang on one blinkin’ minute...

A series of tactical blunders, missed penalties, Juanfran, conceding last second goals. LLL has just remembered whose ground the match was being played at - which surely explains the foul-up against France.

It’s the curse of the Vicente Calderón!

Television black-out means Spain fans miss out on Belarus battering

2012-10-15T09:27:00Z

A devastating, breath-taking display by Spain on Friday evening saw the world and European champtions tear apart their hapless opponents from Belarus. From the very first minute, Vicente del Bosque's side demonstrated that they didn’t need no Piqué or Puyol at the back to show the world of football that la Selección continue to be the Mack Daddies of the world game. Up yours Delors!

To be honest, La Liga Loca has absolutely no idea what happened in Minsk bar a quick 15 second glimpse of Spain’s four goals, three of which came from Pedro. For all the blog knows, Guti could have ran onto the pitch dressed as Queen Victoria - but for once there is a valid excuse for missing the game. The only Spanish souls to see the match from the comfort of their own homes were those near the Portuguese border, who were able to pick up stray signals from the nation next door, and hardy folk who found handy on-line streams via Romania.

In a clear example of the tough financial times in suffering Spain, not a single domestic broadcaster chose to pay for the rights to show the national team’s World Cup qualifier. From Wednesday, there were warning signs a’plenty that there might be something of a black-out, but the feeling was that with Spain being Spain, some kind of late deal would be arranged to show the Belarus clash.

The rights to the game were held by a sports marketing company ‘Sportfive’, who were reportedly asking Spanish broadcasters for €3 million to show the fixture. That price then dropped to €1.5 million once it became clear there would be no takers at the original price, and then eventually to around €750k, but by that stage everyone had walked away from the negotiating table.

In the Spanish broadcasters’ opinion the match was too expensive as not only was it was fairly unimportant and unglamorous affair, but also one which kicked off at the non prime time hour of 8pm on a bank holiday. Times are already tough for the country’s media without throwing even more money away.

Supporters weren’t even able to go old-school, with radio companies advised they would have to pay €25,000 each to commentate from inside the stadium. Instead, mini-studios were hastily set up in hotel rooms and the match was reported from there using local TV.

There'll be no such problems on Tuesday, however, with the dastardly French coming to the Vicente Calderón for Spain’s third qualifier, and a bit of a big one at that. The game’s early themes are centering around strikers. In Spain’s case it’s whether the country is going to play one and if so, whether it will be Fernando Torres returning to his beloved home-side stadium after an absence of five years.

In the France camp, Karim Benzema is the talk of the town, with Marca having to report some uncomfortable truths about the Real Madrid man's international record, with the striker's barren spell in a France shirt now stretching back 677 minutes. “France have very strong players in midfield and up front and can count on the quality of footballers of the class of Ribéry and Benzema, that we all know,” warned Del Bosque ahead of the upcoming neighbourly battle, ignoring the suggestion his team's Euro 2012 quarterfinal opponents were in decline.

For a side that tends to play much of its games in the provinces, the fact that the France clash is a grand affair and being taken very seriously indeed is shown by the decision to play the game in Capital City.

What’s more, it’s even going to be on TV as well. Time for Spain to put on their big-game boots.

Mole undermines dressing room as Bielsa admits his shortcomings

2012-10-12T13:47:00Z

So there is something leakier in Bilbao than Athletic’s back four: the team’s dressing room.

If matters weren’t bad enough for a club already suffering a pizza-ordering, Friends-box-set-sized hangover from last season, a heap of trouble has recently hit the bothered Basques. Athletic are 16th with just two league wins and have an exiled Fernando Llorente scowling from the bench.

A couple of weeks ago, a partial recording of Marcelo Bielsa speaking after the Copa del Rey defeat to Barcelona, was leaked to the press. In it, the team’s crackpot coach took the blame for some of the double cup-final defeat.

But only partial. “To lose two finals like we lost them!” tutted Bielsa, recalling the Atletico Madrid Europa League disaster, probably while mumbling and starting at the floor. Or perhaps even squatting, as is Bielsa’s wont. "You allow yourselves to laugh after seeing there are fans coming back walking from Madrid, and we're on top of a bus laughing after losing a final.”

The whole of the nine-minute mauling delivered to the defeated footballers was then released into the wild, so the big questions bouncing about the Basque Country are who the leaker is and why.

Old-timer Carlos Gurpegui has stepped up to say that the release of the secretly-made recording is very bad news indeed. “There are rules in our dressing room. Let’s hope it doesn’t happen again,” warned the veteran midfielder, assuming that the dirty deed had been done by a player - a particularly disgruntled one looking to make Bielsa look like a very grumpy manager indeed. And a bit of a meanie-head.

Other theories doing the rounds are that it was the bosses of the club itself who were the guilty party, in an attempt to force Bielsa to resign. This was denied outright by Athletic president Jose Urrutia, who played 401 times for the team and is therefore a novelty among Primera big-wigs in that he actually knows something about football.

“It’s disappointing and very sad that someone records something that should stay with the coach and the 25 players,” claimed Urrutia, who must be looking back to the heady days of last season with some affection.

“Someone wanted this to be released but I’m not going into it any further as it’s not good for the club,” fumed Bielsa, who said that he had not heard the recording and no intention of hearing it.

Marca for one were very upset about the whole affair and claim that the leak “violates the fundamental principles and old codes of honour” - although the paper, like every other media provider, was happy to report the details of Bielsa’s rant.

The episode is just another tale from a season that is turning very sour indeed for Athletic. From Bielsa’s falling out with his president over modifications to the training ground to the particularly acrimonious departure of Javi Martinez, nothing seems to be going right at the moment for the battered Basque club.

Pepe and Iniesta fill media void with a school-yard scrap

2012-10-10T13:37:00Z

It’s a bit pathetic, petty and ever-so-slightly-childish. So quite naturally, the hard-hitting, dirt-digging La Liga Loca is all over the spat between Pepe and Andrés Iniesta currently being fought out through the pleased-as-punch press, who are glad to finally have something decent to chew on.

Everyone being immensely nice to each other in the wake of Sunday's Clásico left a bit of a vacuum in the Spanish football media, what with everybody agreeing the result was fair and that both Leo Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo were both jolly good players.

Ahead of September's international break, a certain Real Madrid man admitted that he felt a bit sad, which kept the presses printing and television tongues a-wagging for a good week or so. This time around, the only post-Clásico scraps have been Pepe’s suggestion that Andrés Iniesta is a bit of a diver and Tito Vilanova's retort that the Portuguese defender likes to boot people about.

Evidence of recent years could support both cases, however the two parties involved have decided to pull each other’s pig tails via the press in order to keep the story rumbling on. Iniesta responded on Tuesday by saying that “what Pepe said was offensive, but we all know him,” something bordering on a red-faced rant from the usually mild-mannered Clarke Kent of la Liga. “I’m not a cheat and nor are my team-mates,” huffed the Barça man, handedly ignoring the recent FA report over Gary Medel’s sending off which suggested quite the opposite about a certain Cesc Fabregas...

AS were Real Madrid’s heroes on Wednesday, revealing that over the past three years Pepe has been ‘foulee’ more than he has been 'fouler' by the margin of 1.3 to 0.9 - ergo Tito Vilanova is a big stupid head. All in all, it’s rather unedifying from AS, who should perhaps be giving more covering the fact that as of Wednesday morning no TV company in Spain could afford to televise Wednesday’s World Cup qualifier in Belarus.

As with Javier Casquero a few seasons back, Pepe wasn’t going to let the matter quietly lay to rest. “If someone was offended, it’s because the truth hurts,” nah-nah’ed Pepe from the safety of the Portugal camp.

There’s still a very long way to go until proper league football is back - or at least until Tuesday’s dust-up with France - so LLL is panting and pawing at the idea of the Catalan press picking up on Jordi Alba’s as yet unmade throwaway comment that Real Madrid pongs of poo-poo and a stout response from AS whose scientific tests prove that nothing but perfume oozes from the Santiago Bernabeu and that ‘tis the Catalan club that whiffs of wee-wee.

After all, whenever you think that things have hit rock bottom in la Liga, there’s always someone out there willing to starting digging. With a big, blooming drill.

Good Day, Bad Day: Simeone admits hating words, Clásico makes everybody happy

2012-10-09T08:25:00Z

RESULTS Fri 5 Oct Celta Vigo 2-0 Sevilla Sat 6 Oct Real Betis 2-0 Real Sociedad, Real Valladolid 1-1 Espanyol, Real Zaragoza 0-1 Getafe, Rayo Vallecano 2-1 Deportivo Sun 7 Oct Atletico Madrid 2-1 Malaga, Barcelona 2-2 Real Madrid, Athletic Bilbao 1-0 Osasuna, Mallorca 1-2 Granada, Levante 1-0 Valencia.

Good Day

Barcelona & Real Madrid
Bravo, bowler hats in the air and hip-hip-hooray for a cracking Clásico contest that showed both teams at their best and, as a nice little bonus, left everybody with something to be happy about. Barcelona keep their plump eight point lead at the top of the table - something they would've taken very happily had it been offered at the beginning of the campaign. Yet Real Madrid will feel cutting that the task of cutting that lead back is very much doable. Indeed, in an alternate universe, the gap was not far off from being just three, with Barcelona picking up late points against Granada and Sevilla in recent matches which could have easily gone against the Catalan club.
La Liga Loca is also a happy clapper as Spain is going into the international break without anyone appearing to be sad, either. And no eye-poking either.

Atlético Madrid
Own goal in the last minute that sees one team losing all three points? In previous years you would've put your mortgage on it being Atlético and probably Diego Godín suffering such foot-blowing off misfortune. However, this is Super-Atlético and such days appear to be long in the past. Instead it was Málaga’s Welligton who bundled the ball into the back of his own net in injury time (although, to be fair, Falcao would have got to it anyway), helping Atlético wind up 2-1 winners and moving to second in the table on the same points as Barcelona.
Diego Simeone declared himself to be happy after the game, but it was nothing more than that for the tough-talking trainer. “Our objective now is Real Sociedad. I don’t like words, I like actions and actions send us to San Sebastian.” Grr.

Betis
The game against Real Sociedad was an odd affair all round, with a power cut at the very start - not an iffy Rayo-style one, but across the barrio - and a corner flag being snapped when a player missed the ball. Nevertheless, the victory over Real Sociedad puts the team into the Champions League places, a splendid achievement even if it is still only October. What’s more, Betis are higher up the table than Sevilla. A fine tongue-sticking out moment if ever there was one.

Diego Castro
Two goals in the past two games for the Sporting man gives Getafe two wins. Beautifully symmetrical.

Rayo Vallecano
Saturday's fixture in Vallecas saw something happen that must have had the bigwigs who run the Spanish game scratching their dunderheaded scalps. Rayo’s clash against Deportivo was played at the people-friendly time of four in the afternoon, while the club decided to sell tickets to members for under €10. The result was a truly packed and rocking stadium, which pushed a limited home team to victory against even more limited visitors. After three straight defeats, Rayo really needed the 2-1 victory to avoid heading into the international break on a bit of a downer.

Obafemi Martins
Another great strike from Levante’s new super-striker inspired a 1-0 win over big brothers, Valencia. Martins chased down a huge hoof up the field from goalkeeper Gustavo Munúa like a pugnacious puppy, shrugged off the defender and wellied in Levante’s wonderful winner.

Celta Vigo
If there’s one thing LLL loves (aside from pork pies), it’s rampant enthusiasm. Okay, that's not strictly true, but let’s jettison that thought for the purpose of praising Celta Vigo. After Friday’s 2-0 win over Sevilla, Celta coach Paco Herrera claimed that on its day his team “can beat anyone”. This could mean we are set for a lively encounter in the Santiago Bernabeu in a fortnight’s time with Celta hopefully bringing their best back of tricks to the Spanish capital in a contest against Europa League chasing Real Madrid.

Granada
The Andalusians are showing some stones with back-to-back victories. Sunday’s win over Mallorca was down to a little bit of help from the referee for getting a penalty for a foul outside of the box, but the performance was nonetheless impressive enough.

Ariz Aduriz
To Athletic fans, the forward is the poor man’s Fernando Llorente, who continues his semi-exile from the starting line-up, however the striker would have had many a beer bought from him in Bilbao on Sunday with a tidy strike to give Athletic a desperately needed 1-0 win over Osasuna and give Marcelo Bielsa more squatting and squinting time in the technical areas of la Liga.

Bad Day

Sevilla
After all the recent excitement of the beating Real Madrid and coming oh-so-close to doing the same to Barcelona, it was the old, floppy Sevilla who lost out to Celta Vigo. Despite the team being without the suspended Ivan Rakitic and Gary Medel, Michel the Manager took the defeat on his perfectly proportioned chin. “We can’t offer up this performance after all the good we’ve done in the past six rounds. We were bad and there’s nothing else to be said.”

Real Sociedad
Still quite, quite hopeless away from home.

Valencia
The men from Mestalla continued their lousy start to the season with a defeat to the accursed Levante, for the first time in the past four league trips over the fence and into their neighbours' back yard. “After the goal we played the game that Levante wanted and we made mistakes,” complained the very under-fire coach, Mauricio Pellegrino, whose team are just two points off the relegation zone.

Zaragoza
Losing at home to Getafe could be very costly indeed come the end of the season. Or not, if they pick up loads of points between now and then...

Deportivo
May as well have played the first half with cardboard cut-outs of the players being pulled about on ropes. Deportivo started the season so brightly and with such promise but now find themselves in the relegation zone with just the single victory from seven.

Espanyol
A point at Valladolid doesn’t really do the bottom-dwellers much good. However it could have been very different for the under pressure Pericos if a perfectly good injury time strike hadn’t been wrongly ruled out for offside.

La Preview: Ignoring Atlético, a sensation at Celta and an awful week for Espanyol

2012-10-05T09:04:00Z

FRIDAY
Celta Vigo (14th) v Sevilla (4th) – 21.30 CEST
Normally, the only things that excite the fish-obsessed fans of Celta Vigo are saucy stories involving sardines. But that was until the club reeled in Arsenal's Korean striker Chu-Young Park on a loan deal – quite a catch for the side – and the South Korean landed a goal soon after. At that moment, the Galician side netted a whole shoal of new fans who cod not have been happier when Celta put an interview of the forward up on the team’s web-channel. Unfortunately, the interview hooked in so many fans that the site crashed after around 18,000 surfers in eight hours took Celta’s bait. No doubt eel be happy to round off the week with a goal against visiting Sevilla on fry-day night. [Ed: That's enough, it's giving me a haddock.]
LLL Prediction – Draw

SATURDAY
Rayo Vallecano (13th) v Deportivo (16th) – 16.00
The Spanish football media quickly tired of the Rayo floodlights story, but La Liga Loca will follow it doggedly, at least for another week. There has been no further progress in finding out who allegedly cut a bunch of electricity cables ahead of the Real Madrid game, but AS claim Rayo have changed some internal procedures. All employees bar the head of maintenance have handed in their entrance keys, while security cameras have been installed inside and outside the ground – moves which smack of horses bolting, but, er... refusing to drink.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Zaragoza (15th) v Getafe (11th) – 18.00
The return of a troubling la Primera concept: you get fined about €600 for lobbing potentially damaging objects onto the pitch, but five times the punishment for flashing a T-shirt. In last Monday’s Getafe forward Diego Castro celebrated the winner against Mallorca by lifting his top to reveal a tribute to the sadly departed Manuel Preciado. Castro worked with the marvelous Manolo at Sporting and wanted to dedicate the “most important goal of my career because of what it meant to all Asturians, for his family, for me and for everyone who knew Manuel Preciado.” It could cost Castro a fine of up to €3,000 beside the obligatory booking, but he calls it “the best investment of my life.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valladolid (7th) v Espanyol (20th) – 20.00
Poor Mauricio Pochettino: the tracksuit-loving trainer deserves better. On Monday, the in-fighting Espanyol board met to decide if anything needed to be done in reaction to the club going to the bottom of the table. The answer was "no", but a day later the board changed its mind, resigned en masse and called shareholder elections to vote for a new president in November.

Meanwhile, Perico boss Pochettino stood by waving his resignation, which was never accepted by the departing big-wigs. Aside from that there’s not too much that the Argentinian coach can do aside from beat Valladolid on Sunday, considering that there’s nobody around to clean the club’s kitchen, never mind sack him. Which would be quite undeserved, anyway. LLL Prediction – Home win

Betis (9th) v Real Sociedad (8th) – 22.00
La Real are very much a Jekyll and Hyde team. Apart from not being fictional characters. Or medically trained. Or monsters. At home in la Anoeta, the San Sebastian team are strong Primera performers, having gone six months (eight matches) without losing: Champions League form that would see them third in the calendar year 2012. Away from home it’s a sadder story, with la Real having won just the once over the same period: proper relegation form.
LLL Prediction – Away win

SUNDAY
Levante (12th) v Valencia (10th) – 12.00
Valencia have had a soft start to the season but last weekend's victory against Zaragoza and the Jonas-inspired Champions League midweek win against Lille have quietened the boos. Unless you happen to be Dani Parejo, jeered by Mestalla supporters who have the hump with the former Real Madrid, Getafe and QPR midfielder on the grounds that he cost quite a lot of money and has done naff all to repay it. “It’s something incomprehensible. I can’t say why the public booed him,” claimed Mauricio Pellegrini, knowing completely why the public booed him: because they're Valencia fans.

It was a bad week for Valencia midfielders, what with Sofiane Feghouli being banned for three (three!) games after last weekend's double indiscretion: a second-yellow sending-off followed by ever so slightly clapping the decision of referee Pérez Montero.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Mallorca (5th) v Granada (17th) – 16.00
LLL was rather surprised to read this week that Granada didn’t have a permanent training home, something that tends to be a useful asset at a professional sports club. (Then again, erstwhile top-flighters Hércules had to trek around the region looking for somewhere to practice.) Granada’s current home-from-home is a sports club with a rugby field but a new project will see a new pitch, medical facilities, gymnasium, upgraded dressing rooms and even personalised lockers for the players. Imagine that!
LLL Prediction – Home win

Athletic Bilbao (18th) v Osasuna (19th) – 18.00
If there’s one thing that Osasuna boss José Luis Mendilibar is good at doing, it’s looking very cross indeed. And with good reason at the moment, what with his team having won just the single league match this season. However, shouting and scowling are quite handy means of communication considering the international tingle-tangle world of football and all its many tongues. Take for example Anthony Annan: a Ghanaian loaned to a Spanish side from German club Schalke, whom he joined from Norway. “I don’t understand anything the boss says but when he looks at you, you know what you have to do,” admits Annan. “He’s a very aggressive manager and makes it clear what he wants. He only speaks Spanish and when I have trouble I ask the players who know English.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Real Madrid (6th) – 19.50
The clip-notes of the latest Clásico contest read that the tie hinges on whether Barça’s makeshift defence can hold back Real Madrid’s resurgent attack… or if Ronaldo & Co barely get a sniff of a foray into the opposition half due to Barça giving their opponents a giant football wedgie and extending their table-topping lead to 11 points. Whatever happens, Florentino Pérez will be sat amongst the Camp Nou crowd – in the comfier seats – knowing that whatever happens in the game that he can be president of Real Madrid forever and ever, thanks to a general meeting of the ‘special’ members of the club’s supporters.

In that particular gathering last Sunday, one of the topics of conversation was how to ensure that the ‘right’ kind of person can stand for president of the club come election time. The proposal – passed with a whopping majority, to be fair – suggests ‘not many’. Candidates must have been a socio for 20 years, be Spanish and have the ability to personally deposit 15% of Madrid’s budget into a bank account in an attempt to dissuade thieves and evil-doers. And fellas named Ramón. Given the 2012 budget for the club, that would be a goodly €75m. But with the next elections still a year away, there’s still ample opportunity to start saving some money in time for the campaign.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Atlético Madrid (2nd) v Málaga (3rd) – 21.30
If you're looking for a tip on the Clásico result, consider what would happen to Atlético Madrid if their city rivals were to beat Barcelona: a subsequent Rojiblanco victory against Málaga in the Vicente Calderón would see Atletico top of la Liga for two whole weeks over the international break. Of course, no one outside of the Vicente Calderón collective will notice in Spain as Real Madrid’s glorious success will be blasted across the land for a fortnight, leaving Atlético’s enthralling adventure as a mere football footnote.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Pity and praise as pain-stricken Puyol takes yet another pounding

2012-10-03T15:55:00Z

La Liga Loca is planning a film of the last five months of Carles Puyol’s life. To do so, we will need a bit of money from FourFourTwo’s coffers, a lease on Brian May’s hair and Bruce Willis under strict instructions to play the sort of beaten up, down-on-his-luck, tough cookie, Last Boy Scout character the American dined out on in the 90s after such a promising comic start with Moonlighting.

In this near half-year spell, the Barça defender has largely been responsible for the club’s entire medical bill - the rest has been to pay for the endless requests from Sergi Busquets for plasters to help sooth his “hurties”. In May, it was knee surgery. Soon after recovering from that at the start of the new season, Puyol managed to get his cheekbone dented in a dust-up against Osasuna. A fortnight later, the perm-haired hero landed badly in the Coliseum in a clash against Getafe and was expected to be out for six weeks thus missing Sunday’s Clásico.

However, after what LLL likes to imagine was a quick nip of whisky and a wise-cracking drag on a cigarette, Puyol was back for Barcelona’s Champions League clash against Benfica and lead a considerably more secure (and Song-less) back line alongside Javier Mascherano, just in time for Sunday’s visit of Real Madrid, which would have been a little fraught without the team’s fearless footballer to steady the ship.

But then Puyol hurled himself at the ball at a corner and landed heavily on his left arm to leave it looking horribly out of shape. With the kind of reaction of immense agony that Busquets and Cesc Fabregas display when a butterfly lands on their heads, Puyol was stretchered off and is set to be out for up to two months - or four or five days, perhaps - with what is thought to be a dislocated shoulder.

The vibe in the Catalan capital the morning after was ‘what a shame’ with a solid display ruined by more misery for Puyol. “Smiles and tears,” read Wednesday’s headline in Mundo Deportivo with a supportive Sport cheerfully yelling, “Forza Puyol!”

The positive news from the Benfica win, though - aside from a clean sheet - was goals for Cesc Fabregas and Alexis. The former had been grumbling about wanting to play more, while the latter recently admitted that he would only give himself (generously) five out of ten for the season.

However, a stubborn streak in Tito Vilanova meant that both players got the chance to continue to prove themselves. “The more debate there is over them, the more I’m going to play them,” advised the Barça boss, kicking off a cunning plan in Marca to blast headlines about Cristian Tello and Alex Song being the worst players ever to have set foot on a football pitch. Yet another cunning plan as Sunday’s Clásico creeps ever closer, a match that will be missing Barcelona’s battered and bruised battler.

Has Ramos risked the wrath of Jose by taking the shirt off Özil's back?

2012-10-02T13:41:00Z

It all began sometime last season, if not before - ten months in la Liga is about five years for everyone else. A reportedly heated training ground gripe involving Sergio Ramos and José Mourinho was said to have featured the Portuguese coach moaning at the defender for failing to give him his full backing after a Copa del Rey defeat to Barcelona and for ignoring his instructions with regards to defending set-pieces.

"Sometimes it’s necessary to change the marking,” were the words Marca claim Ramos uttered in reply his unhappy boss. “And as you have never been a player, you wouldn’t know this is sometimes necessary.”

Underlying these grumbles, goes the narrative, is the Spaniard's resentment of Mourinho’s constant cat-fights and the fact his tendency to play negative, feisty football when the going gets tough is making life a big pain in the bum for the players. Mourinho apparently feels Ramos being a Spaniard and a bit of a hunky hero means the World Cup winner getting far too easy a ride from the press, when the coach is too often cast as the villain.

The feud continued with Ramos being dropped for the Champions League clash against Manchester City - 'nothing to see here', claimed Mourinho, fooling no-one. Like an endless tennis rally of back-biting, Ramos told the media after the Deportivo game, in which the defender was restored to the starting line-up, that any problems in the camp should stay behind closed doors. Wham!

Mourinho’s responded with a forehand smash that sent Ramos scrambling across court, declaring that his defender was one of the best in the world...when on good form. Woop!

Tensions appear to have ramped up even further during Sunday’s 5-1 win against Deportivo. During the game, Mesut Özil was reportedly getting a bit of ticking off from Mourinho during the first half and throughout the break, which resulted in the German being swapped with the previously outcast Kaká. After the game, Ramos gave a bit of a poke by saying that “I’ll die for my ideas and principles, why do I have to stay quiet?”

But then it seems that someone at Marca on Monday spotted something usual - Ramos was wearing two shirts during the second half of Sunday’s game and not because it was a bit chilly in the Santiago Bernabeu. Instead, the shirt being worn under his No.4 was the very same No.10 shirt the German no longer needed. Game, set and match!

“Ramos defies Mou!” yells Tuesday’s Marca in what appears to be quite a scoop, with the paper giddy at this apparent metaphorical glove slap to Mourinho’s face. However, the fall-out between the pair has been picked up everyone else, with Barcelona-based Mundo Deportivo claiming a €50m move to Chelsea could well be on the cards for the fed-up footballer.

Ramos reacted later on Tuesday morning with a series of tweets against such “lies”. “Mesut is a great friend and for some time I’ve said that my first goal of the season would be dedicated to him and I took the opportunity of his substitution to wear his shirt, confident that it could be my first goal. Nothing more than that. My relationship with Mourinho is good, honest and clear. I respect his decisions and for me he’s the best coach.”

This story will either go two ways. Mourinho will give a terse response either before or after the Champions League clash with Ajax on Wednesday and the situation will go nuclear and end in Ramos’s exile from the squad and subsequent departure to any club with pockets deep enough to pay for him. Or, everyone will have lost interest in the story within seconds what with the Clásico coming up.

LLL bets on the latter. But in the soap opera world of la Liga, you just never, ever know.

Good Day, Bad Day: Medel gets mad, Madrid get going, Bielsa gets the blame

2012-10-01T12:08:00Z

RESULTS Sat 29 Sep Malaga 4-0 Real Betis, Real Sociedad 2-0 Athletic Bilbao, Sevilla 2-3 Barcelona, Valencia 2-0 Real Zaragoza Sun 30 Sep Espanyol 0-1 Atletico Madrid, Granada 2-1 Celta Vigo, Osasuna 4-0 Levante, Real Madrid 5-1 Deportivo, Real Valladolid 6-1 Rayo Vallecano.

Good Day

Barcelona
Right. First off, to deal with the moaning in Madrid about the referee. Gary ‘the Pit-bull’ Medel didn’t get his nickname without good reason, as seen with his head-shove of Cesc Fabregas which the referee rightfully punished regardless of whether Cesc’s nose was trash-compacted in the process or if the midfielder took a tumble. However, there was a mistake in regards to the hand-ball from Thiago in the build up to Barca's second, but Sevilla still had time to clear the danger so it was sort of indirectly involved in the goal - enough for it to be ruled out in Marca’s ‘Alternative League’ though, LLL would imagine.
Apart from that, Barcelona are looking entertainingly vulnerable at the back without Gerard Piqué and Carles Puyol, but still haven’t been punished for their slackness, with Tito Vilanova’s side having won six from six in la Liga.

Raul García
Whenever the returning from loan midfielder-forward type thing starts for the Rojiblancos, he scores. Well, three times this season, anyway. Sunday’s clash at Espanyol was a huge test for Atlético. Could they win without the injured Falcao and could they hang onto a lead without too many problems against desperate, desperate opponents? The answer was ‘yes’ on both counts, with Atlético making it seven consecutive victories in all competitions.

Málaga
It was an impressive 4-0 win against Betis, even though technically the team only scored one proper goal - for the record the others were a penalty, should-have-been-offside and an own goal - but what a strike it was from the brilliantly bearded Isco.

Ivan Rakitic
There have been far too many disappointing false dawns for Sevilla over the past few seasons for those hoping that there could be a revival from the team, but the committed and competent performances against Real Madrid and now Barcelona lead by the rampaging Ivan Rakitic in midfield must give some optimism for a better future. Until they lose at home to Zaragoza or something dumb like that.

Real Madrid
There was a little bit of a swagger returning to Real Madrid’s strut in the 5-1 win against Deportivo and a Galician defence that were more than a little ponderous. However, rather than next weekend’s Clásico being between the two biggest super-powers in world football at the moment, the geek in LLL feels it’s a contest between a bashed-up Iron Man and Thor without his hammer.

Manucho
Some three years later and Valladolid are still waiting for the forty goals in a season the former Manchester United man had promised them, but the Pucela striker got a chance to start his first match of the season for Valladolid and banged in a couple of strikes in the process. For the record, the Angolan’s tally is now ten in la Liga for the club, but to be fair to the forward a lot of the intervening time was spent on loan in Turkey.

Antoine Griezmann
LLL wasted 90 minutes watching what was a bit of a boring Basque derby so is only going to spend 90 seconds writing about it. Antoine Griezmann was by far the best of a bad bunch in la Real’s 2-0 win over their local rivals (though Athletic goalkeeper Gorka also merits a mention).

Valencia
A 2-0 win against Zaragoza that keeps manager Mauricio Pellegrino in a job for at least another week, or until the Valencia fans opt for blasting him into space either through boredom or just for the fun of it. However, even with a two goal advantage against what were plucky opposition in the shape of Zaragoza, there’s such a tension and nervousness about Valencia that you feel a lead of any size could be flushed down the footballing U-bend in seconds.

Sofiane Feghouli
Arguably Valencia’s best player last season contributed another great display and goal on Saturday, despite the eventual sending off for two yellows (blocking a free-kick and a clumsy whack). Almost certainly the next footballer pencilled in by the accountants at the club to be sold to help pay for the stalled New Mestalla stadium unless ‘Challenge Anneka’ can be revived and be given the project as the show’s first task.

Toño
The Granada keeper played yet another blinder to give his team a 2-1 win over Celta that the side probably didn’t deserve.

Osasuna
A first win of the season for Osasuna with a late-in-the-day 4-0 thrashing of Levante.

Bad Day

Betis
Two sendings off on Wednesday against Atlético - both wrong - and another on Saturday with goalkeeper Casto taking a walk and giving away a penalty in the process, correctly said a refreshingly honest Pepe Mel. “It’s a big punishment but the rules are clear,” said the Betis boss who then watched Málaga’s second goal being given despite an offside and the third coming from an own goal.

Rayo Vallecano
LLL senses that the slide starts here with the weekend's 6-1 thrashing by Valladolid the team’s third defeat in a row, during which time 16 goals have been shipped. “The players were only doing what I was telling them,” confessed Rayo coach, Paco Jémez. “They have no responsibility. I was seriously wrong. I’m sorry for them because they are hard-working people and don’t deserve a result like this.”

Zaragoza
Coach Manolo Jiménez revealed after the Valencia defeat that he had received messages from friends saying his team had played well. If the Zaragoza coach hadn't blocked an over-emotional LLL’s number, the blog would have sent one too. However, the problem with the side is always going to be up front. Helder Postiga is actually a decent striker on his day, but far from prolific. Aside from the occasional piece of poaching from the Portuguese, there don’t appear to be other viable options in the goal-getting department.

Deportivo
When José Mourinho sends out his second-in-command to do the post match press conference, you know the opposition have had a bad day. Deportivo were well and truly Karanka-ed on Sunday at the Bernabeu.

Marcelo Bielsa
Just looking very, very, very sad these days. Especially with Fernando Llorente sitting on the bench from the start. And each week Marcelo Bielsa is all Dobby the House Elf as he beats himself around the head with sticks and leaves and takes the blame for tactical mistakes.

Mauricio Pochettino
The home defeat to Atlético sees Espanyol at the bottom of the table with just the single point and their manager with an unfortunate record to his name. “I’m responsible for the worst start in Espanyol’s history. I’m not happy about this,” fumed the Argentinean.

La Preview: More to leave Mestalla, Özil’s outings and a villain in Vallecas

2012-09-29T07:27:00Z

Saturday

Valencia (15th) v Real Zaragoza (12th) - 16.00 CEST
With all the hurly burly of last weekend’s football and various power outages, LLL didn’t find the time to bring everyone up to date with the off-pitch news from Valencia, which is just as dismal as what’s happening on it. The club were hoping to restart construction on the New Mestalla stadium, which has been suspended since February 2009. Unfortunately, Spanish bank ‘Bankia’ - one of the basket case ones - has pulled out of a partnership with a local promotions company that would have seen funds given to Valencia for the sale of the old stadium and training ground and some cash to complete the team’s new home.
For the moment, the deal looks sunk, with a gloomy club president Manuel Llorente admitting last week that “it’s still going to take a lot to get out of this reality,” and that “the sale of footballers is necessary and one more way of financing.” However, the Mestalla big-wig was a little chirpier a few days later after penning a renewal deal with a sponsor. “Soon these clouds will blow away and we’ll arrive at a good port,” predicted a metaphor-mixing Llorente.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (4th) v Betis (6th) - 18.00 CEST
What a hero! What a player! What a footballer who refuses to fall into cliché about respecting former clubs and behaving as if he’s had an unexpected tax demand when scoring a goal against them! That blog's new idol is the ever so dreamy Roque Santa Cruz, who spent last season at Betis not doing a great deal but has been brought to Málaga this season via Manchester City, his owning club, hopefully to do a little bit more.
And by great galloping gazooks, two of those teams are meeting this weekend and if the Paraguayan poster boy scores he'll take full advantage of it. “I’ve always said what affection I have for the Betis fans but being here in La Rosaleda, people should understand that if I score then I’m going to celebrate the goals with joy. I like celebrating.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Sociedad (14th) v Athletic Bilbao (16th) - 20.00 CEST
What a hero! What a player! What a footballer who refuses to fall into cliché about ‘finals’ or pretending to care about local derbies. That blog's (other) new idol is the ever-interesting, always honest and often quite contrary Real Sociedad winger Antoine Griezmann, who has been talking about Sunday’s Basque battle against Athletic. “It’s important, but I’m not going to spend nights not sleeping whilst thinking about it. Of course, it’s a special match but just as much as all the others as there’s only three points at play.”
LLL Prediction - Home win.

Sevilla (5th) v Barcelona (1st) - 22.00 CEST
Sevilla fans and the wonderful world of Spanish football got to say a proper farewell to Frederic Kanouté this week, with his Champions For Africa charity match on Monday that raised over half-a-million euros for the former footballer’s foundation. However, one of the greatest players in Sevilla’s history says that there is so much more to be done in his future career. “I’m never satisfied with what I’ve done. This is only the beginning. I’ve never said ‘that’s enough’, because when I travel to Africa I see there is so much left to do.” Farewell Fredi and good luck.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Sunday

Granada (18th) v Celta Vigo (11th) - 12.00
On-loan Arsenal striker, Chu-Young Park is still the talk of the toast of the town in Vigo, after scoring just three minutes after coming onto the pitch for Celta in last week’s win against Getafe. However the big issue surrounding the club’s overnight sensation is whether the forward likes ham, a traditional obsession of the Spanish. “I’ve tried it and it’s fantastic!” revealed Celta’s potential saviour to sighs of relief all over the land.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Real Valladolid (13th) v Rayo Vallecano (8th) - 16.00
Those Miss Marple types are probably dying to know what happened with the Rayo Vallecano floodlights and how so many cables were cut without anybody being crispified in the process. At the time of writing, LLL has to report the answer as being ‘dunno’. The police have been in, the club are following procedure by opening an internal investigation, but these are three rumours doing the rounds.
1) It was an act of vandalism by a former employee who had both knowledge of the stadium’s innards and evidently a bit of a grudge.
2) The team’s Ultras acted in a protest about the Day of the Club, when season ticket holders had to pay extra to see the game, perhaps with the help of someone from rumour number one.
3) The floodlights failed due to a huge rainstorm before the match thanks to their rather ancient nature, with someone at the club panicking and come up with a sabotage story to explain it all away.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Osasuna (20th) v Levante (9th) - 18.00
“We are at the bottom as we deserve to be there,” confessed Osasuna keeper Andrés Fernández, whose team have conceded 10 goals this season in five matches, four of which have been defeats. To find out what is going on with one of the blog’s favourite clubs, LLL decided to do an exhaustive study of formations and what-not to discover where Osasuna are going wrong and how they can improve.
Actually, that’s a lie. Instead LLL only bothered watching the ten goals let in and here’s what happened - a penalty, bad goalkeeping, Leo Messi, Leo Messi, bad marking, dithering defending with striker running through on goal, not defending a corner, more dithering defending, an own goal and a penalty.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Madrid (7th) v Deportivo (10th) - 19.50
Today’s update is all about much ado in the Spanish capital as to who will be playing about in the hole. And no it isn’t another Sergio Ramos scandal, you filthy-minded beasties. It’s to do with that spot Real Madrid currently have open behind the striker. At the end of last season, Mesut Özil occupied it, but he seems to have fallen out of favour with fans due to a lack of consistency, disappearing from games, being better for Germany and being out on the lash. The latter has strongly been denied by the forward who protested this week that “I’ve barely been out since the beginning of the season.”
Luka Modric is also there or thereabouts despite saying that he prefers not to play in that position and on Wednesday, Kaká reminded everyone that he was still at the club with a hat-trick (one nice goal, one off his backside, and a penalty) in morale-boosting 8-0 thrashing of Colombian side, Millonarios.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Espanyol (19th) v Atlético Madrid (2nd) - 19.00
Remember Oliver Torres from way, way, way back in August? The new young buck ready to take the Primera by storm? Well, Torres has had a bit of a tough time of it ever since, appearing in all the papers and even his home being photographed. It was so bad last weekend that the wee nipper couldn’t even get a gig for the Atlético’s ‘B’ team. “Suddenly, I started seeing my name in the newspapers and first I found it hard to get used to,” admitted the midfielder to the Spanish FA's website. With Atlético now flying high as the new Real Madrid, LLL would be surprised if the name of Torres doesn’t return to the papers for a while.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Monday

Getafe (17th) v Mallorca (2nd) - 21.30
Remember Dani Güiza from way, way, way back in...er...2008? Well, he’s been at Getafe for the past season and a bit, but you’d never know considering the disco-loving striker as not exactly been a part of Luis García’s plans. The forward is currently somewhere in the region of eighth-choice up front behind the fella who prods the pitch at half-time with his fork and a converted Miguel Torres. But there may be hope for Güiza and Getafe in equal measure, with a story in AS suggesting the European Championship-winning player could be off to Betis in January in what would be a return to his native Andalusia. What could possibly go wrong?
LLL Prediction - Draw

Hopeless and brilliant: Rayo vs Real, the best worst game of the year

2012-09-26T09:12:00Z

When watching a game of football that is so abysmal, so shockingly silly, so bereft of skill that neither side can string more than three passes together, there are two approaches to take. You can either pledge that you’ll never watch England again (b'dum-tish!) or simply hold the incompetency close to your bosom and feast on 90 minutes of farcical football and dynamic drivel.

In Vallecas on Monday night, La Liga Loca took the latter approach for an encounter between Rayo and Real Madrid in which Michael Essien was man of the match simply because he made the fewest mistakes.

Theo Walcott should show Arsene Wenger a compilation of Rayo winger Lass Bangoura’s laughable crosses and misplaced passes, to let the Frenchman know that he could be a lot worse. The only excuse the blog can imagine for the Guinean’s performance was that he was in a completely different zone of space-time to his colleagues: every ball went to where team-mates had been four seconds before or would be in five seconds' time.

There’s no such simple explanation for what was going on in Alvaro Arbeloa's world, but Marca’s match report highlighted both players on that flank and the “intense duel in which both came out losers.”

Then there was the Rayo back four, who constantly attempted to play the ball out of the defence despite the ever-mounting evidence that this was a very bad idea. Oh, and Xabi Alonso somehow managed to remain on the pitch despite charging around like a panic-stricken cat with its head stuck in a pair of boxer shorts.

The football was truly terrible game and utterly brilliant at the same time, especially when you gleefully considered how much half of the footballers on the pitch cost and compared it with how badly they were playing.

Realising that the time had come to drop the meanie-head act for just one match, even José Mourinho hinted that the 2-0 victory was a complete stinker with praiseworthy talk of “concentration and attitude” from Real Madrid despite the confession that his team “could have played better.” “I don’t think we were imprecise in the centre of the park,” opined the Portuguese, “it was a match with a lot of pressure from both sides.”

Mou at Rayo: "I do like a good farce…"

Of course, the other talking point from Monday’s affair was that the match was being played a day late – which apparently affected the players to such an extent that many lost the neurophysiological connections between their brains and feet – and the desire to know why.

On Monday morning, the police arrived at Rayo’s stadium to begin an investigation into suspicions of sabotage to half of the club’s floodlights, set atop one of the stands. Electricians then repaired the lights, which went through a successful test at three in the afternoon.

The Rayo Ultras have officially denied being behind the alleged sabotage and released a statement that they "had absolutely nothing to do with it, we don’t have any way of getting into the stadium. We denounce for the umpteenth time the absolute deterioration of the stadium. This is why we ask once again for the immediate departure of [club president] Raúl Martín Presa, who is directly responsible for what happened.”

The result, which gives Real Madrid their first away win of the season and a hopeful sniff of the European places, leaves two very big questions to ponder over the week. How did those wires in Rayo’s stadium (allegedly) get cut? And how on earth can professional footballers play so, so badly? Ooh... one more question: Can they do this every week please? Pretty please! Pretty please with sugar on top! Pretty please with...

Good Day, Bad Day: Messi and Villa squabble as Atlético keep it wacky

2012-09-24T10:57:00Z

Good Day

The Other 18 (and Barcelona)
With Rayo and Real Madrid having a few electrical issues on Sunday night, the good news is that even more space is left in Monday’s sizzler for the rest of la Liga. But do not fear, there'll be a cord-cutting corker coming up on Tuesday as LLL makes its return to Vallecas in a league where it takes two trips in two days to see one game.

Mallorca
Brutally effective stuff from Mallorca in the win over Valencia brought a result that moved the Balearic team up into second place, without a loss in five. Statistics show 37% possession, three shots on target against the visitors - one of those straight at Diego Alves who spilled the ball for the first - and no corners. However, the result was a 2-0 win. “We had patience and the ability to suffer,” said a pleased-as-punch Joaquín Caparrós, who may well have also been talking about the experience of the Mallorca fans, who have to support a team that are certainly admirable but not always exciting.

Málaga/Athletic Bilbao
A point apiece will have left both teams happy. Málaga continue an unbeaten start to the season after an epic week in Europe, while Athletic keep a second clean sheet in la Liga in Sunday’s goalless draw.

Atlético Madrid
Still a wacky bunch of funsters and a great team to watch, not just for the attacking play of sparkly forward pair of Diego Costa and Falcao, but also the renewed habit of switching off when they get a lead and then nearly blowing it. It happened last week against Rayo, with the visitors 4-0 down but getting back to 4-3 with eight minutes to go, and it was a repeat performance against Valladolid in a rainy Vicente Calderón with Thibaud Courtois making up for a rare blunder that had given the visitors a way back into the match with some fine saves.

Betis
With the Seville side due to play their match in hand against Atlético Madrid on Wednesday, the club could improve on their already impressive current fifth-placed spot. However, coach Pepe Mel will be wary of a repeat of last season, when Betis lead the league after four rounds with a 100% record before losing nine of their next 10 games, a run which nearly resulted in the manager’s sacking.

Obafemi Martins
Levante’s newest recruit says he has moved to la Liga for fun rather than finance, and is already proving to be the club’s missing link up front this season, having replaced Arouna Koné. The Nigerian striker came on at half-time and was quite the handful for the Real Sociedad defence, especially when scoring the winner in Sunday’s 2-1 victory. “I saw Koné’s goals on Youtube the other day. He did well here, but I expect (Martins) to be better,” said Levante boss JIM after the match.

Park Chu-Young
The on-loan Arsenal striker took just three minutes to score his first goal for Celta Vigo, having arrived on the pitch as a second-half substitute, and in the process become the first South Korean to score in la Liga. Celta have been playing some lovely football since the start of the season and are now beginning to get their deserved biscuits of praise with two victories in their last three matches.

Real Zaragoza
Lived life on the edge for much of the final part of the win against Osasuna, but the team’s second victory of the season moved the Aragon outfit into a more snug spot in mid-table. They ain’t all that though, this season.

Abdelaziz Barrada
A defeat for his Getafe side against Celta Vigo, but a third goal at the start of the season for the club’s increasingly impressive attacker.

Toño
A goalkeeper who only used to be newsworthy when his goalkeeper’s jersey featured a typeface which appeared to change the ‘T’ in his name to a ‘C’ - one for the non-Spanish speakers to Google. An exceptional performance from the experienced Granada goalkeeper than had Spanish football journalists once again going ‘delete, delete, delete, rewrite’ three minutes from the end of time after holding off Barcelona for 87 minutes of the match but finding it impossible to get near a splendid Xavi strike.

Bad Day

Barcelona
Another performance that was so flat and wasteful that even local cheerleaders Sport rumbled on Sunday that “football matches last 90 minutes but Barcelona only played for 15.” Still, 15 is the number of points that Barcelona have after five la Liga matches. Which is good, by LLL's mathematic reckoning.

David Villa & Leo Messi
What was nothing more than an all-too-common spat of two forwards whining to each other about a poor pass - something that happens from park football to la Primera - became such a storm in a thimble that the Argentinean was forced after the match to tell everyone the pair were still best buddies, despite longstanding rumours coming out of the Catalan capital to contrary. “This happens a lot on a football field,” sighed Tito Vilanova, most likely sensing an incoming wave of rabble-rousing from the Madrid media.

Valencia
A terrible weekend for Valencia. First came the news that the financing deal that would allow the club to continue the protracted building works on the new Mestalla had fallen through, then came a sorry defeat to Mallorca, leaving Los Che with a record of just the single victory in six competitive games, a run that must already see Mauricio Pellegrini in some trouble at such a notoriously trigger-happy club. “My players gave everything on the pitch and playing this way, we are going to win a lot of games,” claimed the Valencia boss, very much seeing a half-full glass of footballing milkshake, despite the fact that Mallorca drank most of it, ‘There Will Be Blood’ style.

Espanyol
Woe is a wonderful word and it fits Espanyol’s existence at the moment. There was hustle and bustle against Betis in the 1-0 defeat, as there has been all season, but the club still has just the single point despite the Pericos scoring more goals than top-four-bothering Málaga, having netted seven but conceded 11, the most in la Primera. Worse than Real Madrid, even.

Osasuna
A stern dressing room discussion followed Osasuna’s fourth defeat of the season's five games, a 3-1 loss at Zaragoza. There were tough words from tough coach José Luis Mendilibar, who stormed that “at the moment we are not at a level to compete in la Primera,” and that the bottom-dwellers were not playing as a team. “We’d be idiots not to agree with him,” said Oier Sanjurjo after a match in which two of Zaragoza’s winning strikes were an Osasuna own goal and a penalty.

Mourinho outshines his comeback kings

2012-09-19T13:52:00Z

Riveting, engrossing, shocking, stunning, sensational. Five words that describe José Mourinho’s press conference after Tuesday’s Champions League clash, as well as the 90-odd minutes of football that preceded.

Well, about 15 minutes perhaps –15 minutes that helped paper over what was by no means a boring match, but by no means a thriller between the champions of Spain and England. Unless, that is, you get your juices flowing by watching tight midfield threes ram up against each other.

Speaking after the game, a feisty and animated Mourinho seemed to be just as turned on by the fantastic finale as much as anyone else, which is unsurprising considering Wednesday’s headlines and match reports were rapidly rewritten in the space of seconds in the Santiago Bernabeu – much to delight of the hack-hating coach, who twice taunted the Spanish press pack for having to scrap what they had in plan for Real Madrid, what with his side having twice been behind.

“I was expecting the critics,” smarted the Madrid manager. “‘'You are mad', 'You play Varane instead of Ramos', 'You leave the creative players out'. 'Higuaín has no record of goals in the Champions League', 'Coentrao is fresher than Marcelo’. I know it all,” said Madrid’s Mr Clever Pants.

Indeed, the Portuguese seemed to take greater pleasure in messing with the local journalists’ heads than winning the three points in Group D, which were picked up through the tried and tested tactical approach of throwing everything at the opposition and waiting for what traditionally happens to any English goalkeeper given enough pressure and time.

Alternatively, writes Mad Tomás Roncero in AS, who really did seem to enjoy himself during the victory, all that Real Madrid had to do was stick a drinking straw into that never-say-die spirit which makes the club the bestest ever in the world. “[The crowd] knew that the 11 giants that defend this sacred badge are capable of achieving the impossible.”

"How d'you like me now?"

But whilst the next few days in Capital City will be spent poring over the tea-leaves about Sergio Ramos being benched and Michael Essien playing instead of Mesut Özil or Luka Modric, LLL will move swiftly onto Málaga.

The Andalucians arguably put in the performance of the night with a 3-0 win over Zenit to send the Málaga massive doolally – none more so than the team’s owners, who have discovered a debt-reducing human sacrifice called Isco, who scored a truly brilliant brace against the big-spending Ruskies. “It’s been a magical night,” opined the playmaker. “A debut in la Rosaleda and 3-0. You can’t ask for more.”

The Catalan press certainly are. Fuelling LLL's ‘two papers, one brain’ theory, both Mundo Deportivo and Sport lead with the thought that Barça are planning their third trip to Wembley, and intend to make it three wins from the three at the stadium.

There will be a familiar figure on the bench. Not Tito Vilanova, whose face has yet to implant itself in LLL’s brain, but Spartak Moscow gaffer Unai Emery, whom the blog badly misses and who won’t return increasingly desperate emails or calls.

Meanwhile Emery’s old team Valencia are involved in a humdinger of a clash against Bayern Munich, an outfit now containing Javi Martínez which is the dominating factor from the Spanish perspective. Two more great games in what has already been a chuffingly good Champions League session.

Man City meeting could be Mourinho's make-or-break moment at Madrid

2012-09-18T10:56:00Z

For some time now, La Liga Loca has been fashioning some kind of art-deco trinket that will function nicely as a special award for a special person.

The idea of the prize is to hand it over to José Mourinho when the Portuguese leaves Real Madrid - mid-season, so says the man in the know from El País - for his services to Spanish football writers who like time-saving, zero-substance, all hype and gossip stories as their daily filler. And LLL is very much in that category...

Tuesday's Champions League clash with Manchester City was already exciting enough in a purely footballing sense. But where's the real interest in that? English champions against Spanish champions, barometers of the different leagues, yadda, yadda, yadda. Who cares?

But Real Madrid languishing in mid-table after their worst start to the season since about 1784 - currently below Valladolid and Deportivo, no less - and facing a team with the ability to make what Sevilla did to Mourinho's men seem like a pillow fight with Natalie Portman dressed as a kitten, is proper football fodder.

Before, the world may have watched the encounter with the same clinical interest as two geneticists observing whether an amoeba would mate with a giraffe. Now the Santiago Bernabeu clash is a full-on popcorn-with-extra-space-dust event.

The match has either come at a terrible time or brilliant time, depending on what kind of Real Madrid fan you are. The Spanish capital's grumpy taxi-driver brigade - their numbers are in the high thousands - may see the arrival of Manchester City as some kind of much-needed visit from a nemesis of doom which could bring some of the players and the coach down a peg or two. A sort of Atlético Madrid, 'enjoy the pain' fatalism, if you will.

Happier shoppers like those in Marca and AS are talking up the Champions League as an antidote to the terrible disease the club is suffering from. Lazyitis perhaps. "Tonight is Champions League night," writes Mad Tomás Roncero in AS, "with the marvelous hymn that reminds us that the king of the competition was and remains Real Madrid."

"Cristiano Ronaldo will be reconciled today with a goal, both with himself and the supporters in the stands who want this so much," predicts the Madrid-crazy columnist.

Mourinho is of the same mind. In Monday's press conference the Madrid coach genuinely seemed to be enjoying the headlines and carnage he was causing with his "I have no team," complaints, but was of a completely different opinion a few days later with his prediction that "we will have a determined, compact, united team where togetherness is all important."

The result on Tuesday will, of course, have a huge bearing on the mood of the Madrid massive, with a potentially rather uncomfortable time in store for the Portuguese and his players ahead of Sunday's Rayo clash. A drubbing of the young Mancunian upstarts will go a long way towards restoring some lost confidence, and will likely encourage the punter that the title race is back on track and winning the Champions League is a certainty. A defeat and LLL will have to make Mourinho's trophy 'for services to stories that write themselves' that little bit bigger.

Good Day, Bad Day: Stalking Tito, Old-School Atlético and Sensational Sevilla

2012-09-17T12:56:00Z

RESULTS Sat 15 Sep Getafe 1-4 Barcelona, Malaga 3-1 Levante, Sevilla 1-0 Real Madrid, Valencia 2-1 Celta Vigo Sun 16 Sep Espanyol 3-3 Athletic Bilbao, Atletico Madrid 4-3 Rayo Vallecano, Granada 1-1 Deportivo, Osasuna 1-1 Mallorca, Real Sociedad 2-0 Rayo Vallecano

Good Day

Tito Vilanova
Poor Tito. Not only was the Barça boss forced to watch the Getafe match from the stands as he continued to serve out suspension for potty-mouth misdemeanors in the Osasuna clash, but Vilanova also had to endure LLL sitting behind and along a bit from the manager, furtively looking to see if he was playing Angry Birds to pass the time or muttering insults about Cesc Fabregas under his breath. Sadly for the exclusive-searching blog, Tito did neither, but instead sat fairly quietly and contentedly as Barcelona had a very uneventful win over Getafe that only really got going when Leo Messi came onto the pitch.

Javier Saviola
The Argentinean now at his fourth Primera club had a fine weekend. It was Saviola’s first start for Málaga, which produced a goal and an assist to boot. “I’ve not felt such a warm reaction from the fans since I was at River Plate,” squeaked a chirpy Saviola after the game, recalling the moment when he was substituted.
However, manager Manuel Pellegrini was less happy in relation to the steamy, sticky, positively English kick-off time on Saturday. “Neither in Sevilla nor here can football be played at four in the afternoon,” complained the Chilean whose team now sit happily in a very splendid second place.

Mallorca
With Valladolid yet to play at time of writing, Mallorca are in third place after a 1-1 draw with Osasuna that would be best described as gritty, but not in the usual dull way with the Balearic side but in a gutsy, thuggish, ‘ave-it!’ manner. Mallorca boss, Joaquín Caparrós, complained that his team “lacked intensity” but the side remain unbeaten after a strong start to the season.

Sevilla
“Hello? Hello? Hello there!?” Poor Sevilla. Like a tree falling in the woods, making a sound and all that, does anyone remember the opposition when Real Madrid lose a game? LLL does! Sevilla put in the kind of hard-working, sleeves-rolled up, professional performance against Real Madrid on Saturday that the side has consistently failed to do week-in, week-out for the past couple of seasons.

Atlético Madrid
Huzzah! The old Atlético Madrid is still alive and kicking despite all that winning trophies nonsense the club has been up to of late. 4-0 up and positively coasting against Rayo Vallecano with eight minutes left on the clock, the Rojiblancos decided to make things exciting on a Sunday night by gifting Rayo three goals - the last of which being Diego Godín inspired defensive chaos of the highest order.

Real Sociedad
A 2-0 win against Zaragoza in a match that sort of just existed on LLL’s TV. That was pretty much the opinion of the report in AS as well, which suggested that time may have stood still for the duration of the spirit-sapping encounter.

Valencia
At 2-1 up but with Celta Vigo pressing in the final moments, the sensation that Valencia were about to blow another lead in comedy fashion was immensely strong. However, the Mestalla men hung on to leave the supporters’ white handkerchieves unwaved and tucked in pockets at the final whistle. Saturday’s victory was achieved “without playing well,” opined Mauricio Pellegrino.

Míchel
A proper goal for the Levante man. Get ball, run with ball about 50 yards, whack ball into the roof of the net. Job done.

Fernando Llorente
After a summer which was hardly the best for the Athletic man, first for his lack of action in the European Championships and then the transfer kerfuffle with Juventus, Llorente finally got back to playing and scored just seconds after coming off the bench in the 3-3 draw with Espanyol. “Although there will be a time in my career when I’m not here, I’ll always be Athletic,” I-will-survived Llorente after the match.

Bad Day

Real Madrid
There’s going to plenty of time for the blog to hover like a vulture over the stumbling rabbit in the desert that is Real Madrid in the days to come, so we won’t dwell too much on the current crisis except to say that if all the stories are true about a Spanish/Portuguese split in the dressing room and players fed up with José Mourinho and looking to force the manager out, then Luka Modric is probably going to be feeling a little bit miffed about his move for starters. Oh yes, the title would probably be lost for Real Madrid already, saving everyone in Spain a lot of time and energy over the next eight months or so.
However, should everything be a tad exaggerated as things tend to be sometimes in la Liga and Madrid spank Manchester City then before you know it, the local press in Capital City will be declaring “It’s time for the Tenth!” Champions League and claiming that winning la Liga is so passé and for losers anyway.

Cristiano Ronaldo
There was much mockery for the Portuguese after it looked like the forward was going to burst into tears after the Sevilla defeat. However the LLL is going to support the Real Madrid man and suggest the criticism would have been even greater had Ronaldo looked like he didn’t seem to care that much about the loss.

Celta Vigo
The defeat to Valencia was another game where the Galicians played reasonably well but didn’t have much to show for it after the match.

Espanyol
It was still a nice, shiny point won by the Pericos in the draw against Athletic - a considerable improvement from the zero the side had before the weekend - but it was a couple dropped considering that Espanyol held the lead three times in the game and were even 2-0 up against the Basque visitors. “We need to improve very quickly and a great deal,” was the opinion of Mauricio Pochettino on his team’s defence.

La Preview: Soldado’s succour, Negredo’s naughtiness and Espanyol’s ennui

2012-09-14T08:35:00Z

SATURDAY
Málaga (3rd) v Levante (11th) – 16.00 (local time)
After a summer of radio silence from Málaga’s owners and mere confusion from Manuel Pellegrini and the players, the club’s executive vice-president Moayad Shatat spoke to the media last week in a chat that was a little bit vague about Málaga's general direction.

Perhaps the main zingers from the session were “we want to invest, but correctly” and “the club is not for sale”. But it was some of the other answers that were more intriguing – or perhaps it was the questions: “Did you find financial irregularities?" "It's difficult to explain” and “Has someone been stealing from the club? "I didn’t find any evidence.” LLL's spidey-senses feel that this Málaga mystery may run for a little bit longer.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Valencia (17th) v Celta Vigo (13th) – 18.00
Patience makes the heart grow fonder apparently. Justice is its own reward. She that laughs first laughs loudest. That’s the info from Roberto Soldado’s midweek success from the Spanish squad. The Valencia man could have fallen into a great big sulk having been left out of the Euro 2012 team for Alvaro Negredo, Fernando Llorente and Fernando Torres – to be fair, the Valencia man would barely have played a minute – but Soldado came running back to the team with tail wagging and scored the winning goal in Spain’s 1-0 World Cup qualifying win against Georgia.

However, the first thing the striker wanted to do on his return to Spain was to take his children to school, after just a couple of hours' sleep. “I was 10 days away from home without seeing them and this is the most important thing for me. The best part was hugging my children.” Awwwww.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Getafe (10th) v Barcelona (1st) – 20.00
Football! Politics! Cataluyna! Run away! Well, no... shan’t. In response to a massive demonstration in Barcelona calling for Independence For Catalunya and Down With This Sort Of Thing, it’s only natural that FCB became involved – Sandro Rosell attended the rally and Pep Guardiola sent a video message supporting the cause – although the ‘club’ is no longer as strident on this topic without Joan Laporta, who of course never used Barcelona for own political career, oh no.

The response over in Capital City of ‘well, if you hate Spain so much why do you want to play for them, etc’. Indeed, a poll published in AS on Friday sees 85% of those bothering to vote feeling that if Catalunya became independent then Barça should leave la Liga. LLL would like to see the poll results after those voting are told what that would mean to TV money and Real Madrid’s ability to pay Cristiano Ronaldo’s salary.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Sevilla (7th) v Real Madrid (9th) – 22.00
Intriguing stuff from Alvaro Negredo during the international break, with a bit of spare time after missing out on the Spain squad. The forward was poking around why Sevilla were so bloomin' poor last season, failing to finish in the European places when even Levante managed it. According to Negredo, not everyone was giving 120% last year and rowing in the same direction.

“It was a very indisciplined dressing room,” revealed the striker, strikingly. “Not indisciplined due to bad people or anything like that, but stuff which meant that the team didn’t do well in the end. We didn’t get to training on time, someone would come late... these were things that took their toll on the group.” Negredo also said that the arrival of Míchel the manager midway through the campaign didn’t make a difference, either. “He got angry quite a lot, but nothing changed.”
LLL Prediction – Draw

SUNDAY
Espanyol (19th) v Athletic Bilbao (15th) – 12.00
Not exactly an enjoyable international break in Cornella, with Espanyol in the table-bottom badlands after three defeats. To express a certain level of dissatisfaction with this sorry situation, a vocal group of 30 fans went along to a training session, where they didn’t exactly give their support to the struggling players. “The same thing happened to me at Atlético,” noted Joan Capdevila, “but it was after round 15, not round three.”

Espanyol coach Mauricio Pochettino admitted that he feels the supporters’ pain and that he had noticed “more than just unhappiness, there’s also a certain fatigue,” in the Perico peeps. “At the moment, there’s nothing that generates something positive.”
LLL Prediction – Home win

Granada (18th) v Deportivo (6th) – 16.00
Two goals in three matches can be considered Messi-prolific form for Riki, who scored just three in 19 league games last time Depor were in la Primera. And two in 29 with Getafe in 2004-05. So it’s no wonder that the Deportivo Destroyer is in buoyant mood, declaring that “I feel better at 32 then when I was 26.” LLL would suggest this isn't too much of a boast, considering at that age Riki managed five goals in 32 matches.
LLL Prediction – Draw

Osasuna (20th) v Mallorca (2nd) – 18.00
Poor Osasuna can’t seem to get a break these days. Bottom of the table with no points, fairly skint after losing sponsorship from the local government and now the news that the club are going to have to fight tooth and nail to get any money due to them from the sale of Javi Martínez to Bayern Munich. FIFA regulations state that Osasuna are due €800k from the deal for the midfielder, who began his career in Pamplona, but Bayern Munich are quite clear that they aren’t going to stump up the cash. “Nothing to do with Bayern, it’s Athletic who have to pay,” said Munich president Uli Hoeness.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Real Sociedad (16th) v Zaragoza (14th) – 19.50
Considering Zaragoza's coach said the club would like to looking towards youth for the future, it was quite strange to sign 37-year-old freebie José Movilla, who left Rayo Vallecano over the summer. Nevertheless, the veteran midfielder – who is at the club for a second spell after leaving in the late 1920s – has still got the moves, from what LLL saw in Vallecas last season. “I was the footballer who played most games at Rayo last season [38] and few players have managed that,” was the reminder from Movilla at his presentation.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Atlético Madrid (8th) v Rayo Vallecano (4th) – 21.30
Mere coincidence? Atlético Madrid formally commemorate the death of former owner and president (and despicable human being) Jesús Gil – and celebrate of 25 years of the Gil family at the club; on the same day, UEFA announce that prize money due to Atlético – estimated to be worth around €11.5m – will be held back due to Rojiblanco-owned debt under the Financial Fair Play initiative, which punishes clubs that owe money to other clubs, its employees or tax authorities.
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY
Valladolid (5th) v Betis (12th) – 21.30
Quite rightly, Betis are still hopping mad about having their round three match against Atlético Madrid postponed just three days before it was due to take place, with the league authorities belatedly noticing a scheduling clash with the European Super Cup and the internationals.

“We wanted to play the game, but if the LFP do this club a 'favour' then there’s not much more we can do,” fumed Juan Antonio Dorado, whose team’s last match was decades ago on the 25th August.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Athletic’s intruder and Ronaldo's ‘alternate reality’

2012-09-12T10:03:00Z

Twas the early hours of last Saturday night at Athletic Bilbao’s training ground and not a squeaky mouse was stirring, aside from Brownie the Brave who was being kept awake by Marcelo Bielsa performing his crouching practices.

Suddenly, a car pulled up and a tall, muscular figure with far too many teeth got out and vaulted the barrier located at the entrance to the car-park. The attention of a security guard was piqued. Especially so when that figure demanded to be let into the Athletic Bilbao dressing room, a most unusual request to say the least.

According to a tall story in this week’s papers, that figure was Javi Martínez and the Bayern Munich turncoat wanted back the stuff he'd left behind for his dramatic flit to Germany. Unfortunately, continues the tale, all the midfielder was able to retrieve upon being let in to the ground was a pair of boots. Everything else was under lock and key, or possibly had been burned in a bonfire to curse the career of Martínez for his Bundesliga betrayal.

"Have boots, will trav… DOH!"

That’s by far the most tantalising story being told in la Liga this week, with the first couple of days of the new week being dominated by – gasp, horror, oh the suspense – what will happen when Cristiano Ronaldo gets back from international duty on Wednesday. Not that much is expected to happen, except to see if the maudlin forward is still feeling down in the dumps about his tax-rate, not getting enough hugs in the dressing room or the fact that Iker Casillas is always going to be cooler than him. By a long, long way.

As it’s unlikely that a demand that Real Madrid will even out the trendiness by forcing the majestic goalkeeper to have a Dumb and Dumber pudding-bowl haircut and do his media duties in a squeaky voice, it’s widely expected that some serious talks will be taking place about giving Ronaldo a hefty pay-rise.

Rightly so, say Marca, who write in an editorial on Tuesday that a wage hike would be deserved – albeit along with the stinging warning that “Cristiano Ronaldo needs to understand that his arrogance doesn’t help him either in the dressing room or in the street,” and that “the worst enemy of Cristiano is Cristiano.”

"That's it. I'm going down the garden, eating worms"

Strong stuff indeed, but nothing compared to the previous day’s edition, in which the ever-excellent Roberto Palomar has other suggestions to keep the furious forward’s pecker up. “Florentino Pérez will have to create an alternate reality for him, a type of Truman Show where the footballer is given a false Ballon d’Or and where 80,000 extras are hired for the occasion, applauding and cheering in the Bernabeu... including for every free-kick he sends out of the building.”

Eye-popping stuff on both accounts in what is supposed to be the friendliest of media for the Madrid man – and perhaps a warning that while the club president is prepared to be lenient towards his upset starlet, behind the mask his patience isn’t infinite. After all, Getafe are always on the lookout for some more loanees.

La Liga's Transfer Tales: Real Madrid to Zaragoza

2012-09-11T08:17:00Z

Tim Stannard completes his summary of the summer transfer window in Spain...

Real Madrid
Due to the sales of a couple of Castilla players to the Bundesliga and the shipping out of Sergio Canales and Lassana Diarra among others, Real Madrid came away from the summer transfer window €10m in profit. A profit! Real Madrid! Imagine that!
Also contributing to this freakiest of fiscal events is Jose Mourinho bringing in just the single footballer in return for actual money, not counting the late recruitment of Chelsea loanee Michael Essien.
Best signing: Luka Modric. Not that hard a choice really, considering it’s the only player that Real Madrid spent money on. Already looks like being a good option both in central midfield and in filling Mesut Özil’s hole behind the striker, as it were.

Real Sociedad
Investing nearly €4m in Carlos Vela after a vibrant loan spell last year was a summer statement of intent: la Real want a stable season and don’t want no scrubs thank you very much. Also joining (on a free) is Mallorca attacking midfielder Chori Castro, to give la Real some decent strength in depth.
Best signing: Carlos Vela. After several seasons of wandering lonely as a cloud, the marauding Mexican has finally found a home in San Sebastian after scoring 12 league goals last season.

Sevilla
Another year of new beginnings as Sevilla continue to ship players in and out, desperately trying rediscover the golden days of half a decade ago – which ain’t going to happen, quite frankly Mr Shankly. This time the defence has had a bit of rejig, with Alberto Botía joining from Sporting, and Cicinho reminding the world that he was still about after a transfer from Palmeiras.
Best signing: Diego Lopez. Although grumpy Andrés Palop will take some shifting – we’re talking handcuffs around the goalposts stuff here – former Villarreal custodian Lopez will turn out to be a shrewd long-term move for €3.5m.

Valencia
An entertainingly busy summer for Valencia. Five footballers arrived for €20m, but amazingly the Mestalla men still managed to make a €7m profit after dispatching Jordi Alba and a few others cluttering up the place – squad members such as Pablo Hernández.
The €7m signing of Sergio Canales seems a little steep though, with the clearly talented youngster worryingly injury-prone – an awful shame for a footballer who was once Spain’s brightest spark for the future.
Best signing: Fernando Gago. €3.5m seems a fine price for a midfielder who just needs a regular run of games and a comfy spot in central midfield to come good. LLL expects fine things from the Argentinian and his accident-prone parter in crime, Ever Banega.

Valladolid
Not a lot to say about Spain’s yo-yo team. Zero money made on sales and zero money spent. That might be a bit of an issue for a team that only came third in la Segunda last season.
Best signing: Not even going to try guessing about Lluis Sastre joining from Huesca.

Zaragoza
Manager Manolo Jiménez has been trying to wean Zaragoza off the habit of being a cattle market for footballers in intricate loan-and-buy-back deals, hoping instead to impose stability and maybe even spend time developing footballers from the cantera.
To be fair, there’s been some success in this strategy, with just the 12 players joining up for the new season, only one of whom – Málaga’s Apoño – cost actual cash.
Best signing: Romaric. The forename-free Ivorian midfielder cost Sevilla €8.5m in 2008 and left for nothing four years later. Still handy on his day if he can be persuaded to focus just on football.

Part One: Athletic to Espanyol
Part Two: Getafe to Rayo Vallecano

La Liga's Transfer Tales: Getafe to Rayo Vallecano

2012-09-10T07:47:00Z

Part two of Tim Stannard's analysis of the summer transfer activity in Spain's top flight...

Getafe
The ongoing inconvenient lack of supporters and TV money sees Getafe the smartest shoppers in la Liga more often than not. Every season, the best of the Coliseum bunch have to be sold for the side to survive financially, and the poor, long suffering manager has to keep the team up in la Primera all over again. Getafe do this by attracting the best freebies from the lower half of the Liga and borrowing hand-me-downs from Real Madrid. This summer things are slightly different; as well as bringing in the very handy Ángel Lafita for nothing, real money was spent (€4.5m of it) to leave a squad that's more than good enough for a top ten finish.
Best Signing A great year on loan last season saw goalkeeper Miguel Moyá moving permanently for €2m.

Granada
Bonkers. Quite, quite bonkers. According to LLL's information, the club has worked it's way through 59 separate moves of players in and out, up and down, bought and sold, loaned and pretty much everything else over the transfer window. And to be honest, the blog has no idea what's going on, with the links with Udinese, Cadiz and now Watford making everything rather complex.
Best Signing LLL will admit its ignorance here, but assume midfielder Youssef El-Arabi, brought in from Al-Hilal, is a bit handy considering the French-Moroccan cost €5m and scored 17 top flight goals for Caen the season before last.

Levante
The Valencia club missed out on their desire of a big man up front to replace Arouna Koné who came for free from Sevilla, was signed up and then moved on again for a tidy sum - Nikola Zigic and even Emile Heskey were targets. No, really. The team also made a quick profit on Xavi Torres in the same manner with a quick move from Málaga and then to Getafe. Levante are pretty much reliant on freebies from the likes of AEK and Samsunspor to get them through another campaign, however this does see a €3.5m profit being made on deals during the window.
Best Signing This blog has always been quite a fan of former Getafe winger Pedro Ríos, although Coliseum managers have been able to take or leave the 30-year-old over the years.

Málaga
If LLL had predicted before the summer that Santi Cazorla and Rondón would be sold, no money would be spent and Roque Santa Cruz and Javier Saviola would be joining for nothing then you'd say "wow, the owners must either have completely lost interest in the club, run out of cash, or something other reason related to business investments in the local area," then the blog would say you were very clever indeed.
Best Signing Tough one (tosses coin), Roque Santa Cruz?

Mallorca
The Premier League's craze for decent players from middling clubs sees Mallorca making a handy profit in the summer window thanks to the €6m sale of defender Iván Ramis, to Wigan, a figure so hefty that there was still enough money sloshing about to pick up Javi Márquez from Espanyol and as well as doing some good work for charity by giving Javier Arizmendi another gig and paying his salary.
Best Signing Having done brilliantly for Racing Santander during a loan spell from Tottenham the season before last, Giovani dos Santos could well provide similar spark for Mallorca in what is career reboot attempt No.217.

Osasuna
Somehow Osasuna managed to get €4m from Kuban Krasnodar for striker Ibrahima Baldé - rather timely really, given the club lost funding from the local government. All the cash was pocketed, with Osasuna instead opting for free transfers such as Emiliano Armenteros from Sevilla and Rayo Vallecano's Alejandro Arribas.
Best signing Former Villarreal forward Joseba Llorente has still got the moves after a couple of very flaccid seasons at Real Sociedad.

Rayo Vallecano
A massive overhaul of the squad for Rayo but only one sale was managed for the penniless Vallecans after Michu's departure to Swansea. Raul Tamudo left, as did all the loan signings that kept the side up such as Diego Costa. Five youth teamers were promoted to the first team along with a bunch of free signings such as Espanyol defender, Jordi Amat.
Best signing A lot is going to asked of forward Chori Domínguez, who has joined on a free signing from Valencia after not doing a great deal in Mestalla for three seasons.

Part One: Athletic to Espanyol
Part Three: Real Madrid to Zaragoza

La Liga’s Transfer Tales: Athletic to Espanyol

2012-09-06T09:19:00Z

Part one of Tim Stannard's analysis of the summer transfer activity in Spain's top flight...

Athletic Bilbao
Bof! A horribly disruptive summer for the Basque side due to want-away players, hovering clubs, as well as their own dithering. Javi Martínez bought out his own contract to go to Bayern Munich. His position can be sort of covered. The one player they really couldn’t afford to lose in football terms is Fernando Llorente, who is set to stay one more year in Bilbao but then go for free out of contract. However, transfer activity is not over yet for Athletic, who have a couple of weeks to find a replacement for Martínez because of a clause involving ‘hostile’ departures from clubs.
Best Signing: As usual, Athletic had to pay over the odds - €2.5m in this case - but 31-year-old forward Aritz Aduriz returning to his home club gives the team at least some kind of alternative to the willing but limited Gaizka Toquero.

Atlético Madrid
It was a good window on paper for the Rojiblancos, with the club hanging on to Falcao, but perhaps not so well received in the accounting department. That’s what Director General, Miguel Ángel Gil, reckons with the claim that €33m net was needed to be raised this summer to pay the bills. Instead, it’s just €17m after the flogging of Alvaro Domínguez and Eduardo Salvio. That’s why only €1m was spent in purchases with defender, Cata Díaz, joining from Getafe and why the club have not been able to afford to re-recruit the massively successful Diego Ribas.
Best signing: Free transfer Cristian Rodríguez will give a little bit of balance to the attack on the left-wing.

Barcelona
Three players were brought up from the youth team for Barça this summer, but €32m was also splashed on Jordi Alba and Alex Song. Although both handy editions, the Catalan club failed to plug a rather leaky hole at the back with a new central defender. However, finding the ideal player at the right price is clearly not easy so perhaps it was right not to have another Dmytro Chygrynskiy moment.
Best signing: Jordi Alba had already shown at Euro 2012 that he can build fine relationship with Andrés Iniesta. Nice and small, as well, so he'll fit in well.

Betis
One of many clubs in la Primera where it was more to do with who stayed than who left or came in. The wonderfully exciting midfielder, Beñat Etxeberría, is still in Seville despite interest from the Bundesliga, to help continue make Betis one of the most watchable teams in la Liga on their day.
Best signing: Arsenal’s on loan Costa Rican youngster Joel Campbell has already debuted. Looks quite raw but flashes of something good about to happen, Utah Saints-style.

Celta Vigo
Despite having spent five years in la Segunda, Celta have been fairly active in the transfer market with nearly four million blown to strengthen the squad to ensure another year in la Primera. Arsenal’s Chu-Young Park arrived late in the day on loan from Arsenal to help out in attack whilst former Sevilla keeper, Javi Varas, was brought in early doors to give experience in goal.
Best signing: An assist in Celta’s win against Osasuna over the weekend suggests there’s enough sauce in Argentinean Augusto Fernández's boots to justify the €1.5m spent on the winger.

Deportivo
It’s a Portugal party in la Coruña at the moment - LLL senses a Jorge Mendes hand somewhere - with a whole bunch arrive on loan from Sporting, Benfica and Braga to boost Daring Depor’s chances of staying up. There’s also an old school signing too, with Carlos Marchena joining from free after a fun spell at Villarreal.
Best signing: Striker Nelson Oliveira already has one goal to his name since joining Depor on loan from Benfica - and a beauty at that.

Espanyol
€5.3m in sales sums up a tough story for Espanyol at the moment - the drip, drip, drip departure of talent to pay the bills and the arrival of hit-and-hopes from around the world to replace them. Javi Marquez went to Mallorca and Alvaró Vásquez to Getafe, hardly clubs that can consider themselves prettier and perkier than the Pericos. A horrible year awaits for Mauricio Pochettino and co, which is a great shame.
Best signing: He's probably eating up the team’s entire wage budget, but Simao may still have enough juice in the tank to help out.

Part Two: Getafe to Rayo Vallecano
Part Three: Real Madrid to Zaragoza

Ronaldo rumours rumble on, overshadowing Cesc’s own sadness

2012-09-05T09:45:00Z

La Liga Loca suspects that this whole business of Ronaldo being down in the dumps - which fills a huge international break news vacuum rather nicely - will end one of three ways.

The first is that the root cause of the Madrid man’s moodiness is revealed. At the moment, he is giving 20 questions style teasers as responses - it’s something professional and it’s not money. The blog suspects the actual motive will come out in 15 million years when one of the Portuguese’s descendants delivers the response of ’42’ to our new ultimate question.

Florentino Pérez has the solution for the other two outcomes. Ronaldo’s frown is turned upside down with the construction of statues in his image outside every gate at the Santiago Bernabeu, or the club president agrees to the renaming of a calendar month so that la Liga fixtures are officially listed as Real Madrid playing Betis away on the seventh of Ronaldo.

Either way, it continues to have the football media in Spain completely fixated. AS still believe Ronaldo wants a better contract and that the failure to sell Kaká prevented it by keeping the club's funds tied up. Marca have gone completely bonkers and consult Real Betis' sports psychologist and even a handwriting expert, the latter of whom reveals nothing we don’t already know - Ronaldo wants to be recognised as a good professional and has a big ego. Yes, thanks for that.

Look at his little eyes - just look at them!

Various figures in football have been asked for their opinions. Rayo Vallecano coach Paco Jémez suggests Ronaldo would “feel great playing in Vallecas”, while Leo Messi understandably snaps that “when he speaks, don’t come and ask me, it’s nothing to do with me.”

Still, it’s all good news in Barcelona, with their enemy’s star player having a hissy fit, except they themselves have a bit of a dressing room fire to put out with comments made by Cesc Fabregas, a footballer who is struggling to find form, a fixed place in the Barça side and the love of the fans, a section of whom gave him a bit of a boo on Sunday.

“I didn’t notice. I was surprised when I was told as I didn’t hear it,” said the midfielder, channelling former boss Arsene Wenger more than a little.

However, the former Arsenal man doesn’t seem to be as glum as Ronaldo, just slightly irked. “I can’t say I’d be a great substitute. I like to play and get minutes like everybody, but that doesn’t mean I’m a bad teammate.”

Luis Mascaró, writing in ‘Sport’ is also very keen to get this message over, lest Barça fans think they have their own Ronaldo situation. “Cesc’s commitment to this club and the project is absolute. Because Cesc, on top of everything else is a culé. And he is going to show this for sure.”

LLL suggests Barça can begin this campaign by leaving little flags to be waved by the players on the bench.

Good Day, Bad Day: Ronaldo’s rant, Mallorca’s meanness, Levante’s luck

2012-09-03T10:49:00Z

Good Day

Barcelona
It wasn't exactly a glittering Barcelona display in a 1-0 win over Valencia - much like the team’s previous three matches, come to think of it - but LLL is not sure there’ll be too much concern at the Catalan club unless the iffy form continues, with Barça the only team with a hundred percent record in la Primera despite being a touch flat.
“It terms of league position, the start of the season has been brilliant,” writes Josep Maria Casanovas in Sport. “Another thing is the team’s play - static, slow and with no spark.”
Fans of the Catalan club do have an extra bonus, though, to keep them content over the next fortnight with Cristiano Ronaldo-shaped trouble at ‘mill over at Real Madrid.

Mallorca
The Balearic team is continuing to live up to LLL’s prediction of a top six finish for this season. To be fair, it’s not a massively bold tip considering how well Mallorca ended the last campaign under Joaquín Caparrós, with a European spot only just out of their grasp. The experienced Andalusian manager is a genius at squeezing every bit of footballing juice out of his players with 11 of Mallorca’s 14 victories under Caparrós being by just the odd goal. The latest win was a Saturday night 1-0 effort over Real Sociedad that leaves the islanders in second spot.

Málaga
Goalkeeper Willy Caballero tweeted that Saturday’s 1-0 away win at Zaragoza was a great example of the joy of not playing especially brilliantly but getting the three points - a fair reflection of Málaga’s troubled start to the season off the pitch that has fortunately not being matched on it, with Manuel Pellegrini’s side unbeaten and sitting in third.

Rayo Vallecano
LLL was rather surprised to experience the sensation of being cold during Rayo’s goalless draw with Sevilla in a wind-swirling stadium in Vallecas. It was also surprised to see Rayo get away with picking up a point in a match where Sevilla wasted clear chances and contrived to miss two penalties. “49 times out of 50 we would have lost that game,” admitted irked Rayo manager Paco Jémez, who can’t be too upset considering his side are unbeaten in three and sit in the Champions league places.

Riki
Curses. Two goals in three for the Deportivo striker and a lovely effort in the 1-1 draw with Getafe now leaves LLL without a fine source gags for the striker being totally hapless in front of goal. Riki is definitely in possession of a mountain of hap at the moment.

Gonzalo Higuaín
Pipita’s bright start to the season is largely going unnoticed in the Madrid media, where Karim Benzema and Cristiano Ronaldo play the role as the more favoured part of the club’s forward three but the Argentinean now has three goals from three in la Liga, a good thing too considering a rather wasteful Wednesday night in the Super Copa. Aside from a certain pouting Portuguese having a bit of tantrum, not too much to report from the Santiago Bernabeu on Sunday aside from a perfectly perfunctory 3-0 win over Granada and a continued bright start for Luka Modric.

Abdelaziz Barrada
Goals against Real Madrid and now Deportivo - a cooly taken shot under the keeper - sees the Getafe forward as the next footballer set to leave the Coliseum club for enough money to bankroll the side for another season.

Celta Vigo
The Galicians started the game suffering badly from the slings, arrows and long balls of Osasuna’s wonderfully direct approach, with woodwork being a’rattled. But they managed to carve out a 2-0 victory which gave them their first points in three attempts and left the fishermen types above the mighty Valencia in the table. “We have a fortnight of smiles,” beamed Celta coach, Paco Herrera.

Levante
A 3-2 victory over Espanyol had Levante manager Juan Ignacio Martínez (JIM from now on) admitting his team were a little lucky, espcially given their winner came from an injury time own-goal. However, it was still a massively emotional evening in Valencia, with Juanfran in tears at the end due to the effort that a ten-men at times Levante had to put in having gone 2-0 down in a clash, stuffed with truly fantastic goals.

Athletic Bilbao
Hard to know whether what will be more cheering for Athletic Bilbao fans - scoring two or managing to keep a clean sheet against Valladolid in a 2-0 win, after conceding a whopping nine goals in the Basque side’s first two league matches of the season.

Bad Day

Ivan Rakitic, Álvaro Negredo
Sevilla’s uncanny ability to show their soft centre whenever possible and chuck away points on their travels continued, with two players missing penalties. Negredo managed to get his to hit the post at least, whilst Rakitic dragged his own poor effort horribly wide. “I don’t know whether I’m happy or sad,” said an understandably befuddled Míchel after the game.

Cristiano Ronaldo
There’ll be an awful lot more said about Cristiano Ronaldo little bout of sadness. But as a first reaction, LLL is torn between a Daily Mail-type rant about footballers not knowing they’ve been born and suffering first world problems. Then again, when you are down in the dumps, you are down in the dumps, no matter how much money you earn. Such is life.

Zaragoza
An awful pitch upon which an awful team is playing at the moment. “It wasn’t a great game as you couldn’t play football,” admitted an upset Manolo Jiménez after the 1-0 home defeat to Málaga, the second of two such losses from three that also leaves Zaragoza without a goal in La Romareda.

Valencia
Zero wins from three! Two points! Fourth from bottom! Worst league start in 13 seasons! None of that seems too positive at all for Valencia boss, Mauricio Pellegrino, at a club where the fans are notoriously impatient. But this must be countered with the fact that in those trio of matches, Valencia have faced trips to the Santiago Bernabeu and the Camp Nou and put on a decent showing in both games. Last weekend’s late points give-away against Deportivo is certainly letting the side down though.

Espanyol
Not exactly a blistering start to the campaign for the Catalan club with Espanyol sitting pointless at the bottom. It should have been a little bit better though but instead the side opted to throw away at 2-0 lead against what must have been a tired Levante, after their European exploits. “The game was ours after ten minutes,” sighed Mauricio Pochettino, “we didn’t know how to handle the match, atmosphere and the result after the first goal.” “I’m worried,” admitted the Perico boss.

Osasuna
A bit of an unfortunate start to the season for Osasuna who have just zero points to leave the side equal with Espanyol at the bottom-of-the-table. The latest defeat was a clash against Celta that the Pamplona outfit really could have polished off in the first half. Instead, some moments of sleepiness in the back four gave the three points to the opposition. “At key moments, we ran like headless chickens,” fumed José Luis Mendilibar who is set to be giving his charges a truly horrible fortnight until the next clash against Mallorca.

La Preview: Málaga’s magic night & Ronaldo’s attack on society

2012-08-31T10:24:00Z

SATURDAY
Celta Vigo (18th) v Osasuna (19th) – 16.00 local time
Pity poor Celta Vigo, a side that everyone is just tickled pink about on their return to la Primera. Unfortunately, the team are finding their new world a rather difficult dimension to get used to. “It’s a lot harder to get started than I imagined,” sighed club captain Borja Oubiña. “It’s not easy to play against sides in la Primera, as teams don’t give you the ball,” lamented the midfielder whose troubles will probably be over once the Atlético Madrid back four return to usual form and come to town.

Celta may have better luck this weekend as Osasuna are more about pressing than possession, but will be doing so on Saturday afternoon – yes, afternoon, not midnight – without Patxi Puñal, who has received a four-game ban for being very mean indeed to referee Muñiz Fernándes during last weekend’s Barcelona defeat.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Zaragoza (11th) v Málaga (8th) – 18.00
Tick, tock, tick, tock. That’s supposed to be a clock, by the way. It’s the clock of destiny running down before Málaga can’t buy any more players until January for their three competitions this season – la Liga, Copa del Rey and the Champions League.

And it’s hats in the air to celebrate of the last of these challenges after a 2-0 aggregate win over Panathinaikos in a qualifying double-header. This puts the southern side into a group with Milan, Zenit and Anderlecht, which could have been a whole lot worse for Málaga.

At time of writing the Spanish side have signed a grand total of two footballers and the club’s agents are going to have to be busy bees if Manuel Pellegrini is to have his appetite sated. “When the season finished, we said we needed four players and six left. That makes 10 now,” abacused the Málaga manager optimistically on Tuesday.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Deportivo (5th) v Getafe (10th) – 20.00
Interesting. Very interesting. If Marca have got the right end of the stick, the loan transfer of Valencia youngster Paco Alcácer to Getafe has a curious twist to it. Often, clubs agree extra money if a footballer plays above a certain amount of games a season. The reverse is apparently true here, with Marca claiming that the Coliseum club will have to pay a fine if the 18-year-old international striker fails to play in less than 20 official games.

Considering that Getafe’s other forwards currently include Adrian Colunga and Dani Güiza, LLL doesn’t think that the club will have to be dipping into their pockets.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Mallorca (7th) v Real Sociedad (12th) – 22.00
The image has been good, beamed Mallorca goalkeeper Dudu Aouate, discussing his side’s start to the season which has seen one win and a draw. Not if you’ve had to watch this particular image it hasn’t.
LLL Prediction – Home win

SUNDAY
Rayo Vallecano (3rd) v Sevilla (6th) – 12.00
Rayo fans gave a huge sigh of relief at the end last year, not just because the team had successfully stayed up in the final seconds of the campaign, but because calamitous goalkeeper David Cobeño had opted not to renew his contract and was heading to Romania to play for Vaslui. However, the 30-year-old did not take well to life in Eastern Europe and is back at Rayo two months after departing, to leave the Vallecas side with four first-team keepers. So perhaps the news isn’t all bad for supporters after all.
LLL Prediction – Away win

Athletic Bilbao (20th) v Valladolid (2nd) – 16.00
One down, one more to go. Or not. All depends on what happens on Friday with Fernando Llorente, which will be far too late for this blog. Instead, all it knows is that the Javi Martínez transfer saga is finally over. Good news for Martínez no doubt, but bad news for Athletic Bilbao – apart from the €40m injection – and also la Liga, which loses yet another great player to foreign climes.

The midfielder / defender forced through the transfer on his own by heading to Bayern Munich, apparently without permission from his then employers. What’s more, Martínez doesn’t seem too bothered by the pricetag hanging around his neck (not literally). “The situation reminds me of when I came to Athletic from Osasuna,” recalled Bayern’s most expensive signing. “Athletic paid €6m, I was only 17 and it wasn’t a pressure for me but a motivation.”

Meanwhile back at the ranch, Athletic ensured that he won’t be welcome around San Mamés parts any time soon with the club’s website declaring their “disappointment for the decision taken by Martínez, that he didn’t consider our sporting project sufficiently attractive.” Oooh, hark at her!
LLL Prediction – Home win

Levante (16th) v Espanyol (17th) – 18.00
Solid as rock. Nope, LLL certainly isn’t talking about Espanyol but Levante, who cruised to a double-headed victory against the mighty Motherwell to put themselves into the group stages of the Europa League along with Atlético Madrid and Athletic Bilbao. “It’s a historic qualification,” claimed Juan Ignacio Martínez, “it’s something to enjoy – but we can’t forget the la Liga which is our bread every day.”

At time of writing, the Europa draw has not been made. And LLL is far too busy and important to update this entry later on. But fear not! The blog is going to rely on the ever dependable FFT editors to insert details here.......and a full background description of Videoton, should they come up. However, considering it’s transfer deadline day, the message to readers could be "look it up for yourself you bunch of lazy so-and-sos".
LLL Prediction – Home win

Real Madrid (14th) v Granada (15th) – 19.50
Gah! Too much going on at the Santiago Bernabeu this week. So, here’s a Clipnotes version. Modric signing – expensive, but can’t do any harm, gives Xabi Alonso a bit of a rest. Super Copa game – Madrid won but should be worried about how they very nearly blew it against a bit of a hapless, 10-man Barcelona. Esteban Granero leaves – a very good idea for a very decent player. Could do better than QPR. Now if Ronaldo moves back to Manchester United on deadline day, then that really will be the end of LLL’s thin stranglehold on sanity.
LLL Prediction – Home win

Barcelona (1st) v Valencia (13th) – 21.30
The UEFA Player of the Season award on Thursday night has given sections of the Barcelona press a handily-timed distraction from Wednesday’s unfortunate business at the Santiago Bernabeu. Not just because Andrés Iniesta won it – ahead of Leo Messi, quite remarkably – but because of Cristiano Ronaldo’s consequently disgruntled face, the kind of expression that LLL would probably have in the same situation.

“On Wednesday, the Barça players gave a lesson in manners and fair play after the defeat,” writes Joan Vehils in Sport. "A day later and Ronaldo shows that he doesn’t know how to lose. Once again, it’s a bad example for our society.” Not overreacting there at all.
LLL Prediction – Home win

MONDAY
Betis (9th) v Atlético Madrid (4th) – postponed
So let’s get this straight. The time and date for the European Super Cup clash has been out for a while now. The time and date for international week have also been out for a while now. So why was it not until Thursday evening before the halfwits running Spain’s football product realised that Betis v Atlético Madrid on a Monday night wouldn't be a top idea?

Ed's note: In the Europa League draw, Atletico Madrid were paired with Hapoel Tel Aviv (ISR), Viktoria Plzen (CZE) and Academica (POR). Athletic Bilbao got Lyon (FRA), Spara Prague (CZE) and Ironi Kiryat Shmoria (ISR, apparently). And Levante, to answer Tim's question, got Twente (NED), Hannover 96 (GER) and Helsingborg (SWE). Full, in-depth profiles of all those opponents coming up soon, eh, Tim?

Modric met with little fanfare after finally making move to Madrid

2012-08-29T07:15:00Z

“Er, hang on, this isn’t what Cristiano Ronaldo got,” must have been the thought passing through somewhere behind Luka Modric’s floppy-fringe as the midfielder trotted out onto the Santiago Bernabeu pitch on Monday afternoon. Heck, even Julian Faubert got to meet a rightfully-puzzled Alfredo di Stefano.

Instead of 80,000 cheering spectators and a very warm hand on the Croatian’s entrance, some 100 fans were in the Santiago Bernabeu at around 14.30, along with a rapidly-assembled press pack that had been left standing in the sun for quite some time due to a delayed flight for the new signing.

To be fair, there wasn’t a lot of opportunity for anyone to get to the stadium in time, lending more credence to the theory that Modric’s arrival in Madrid was a rather hurried one. An email popped into LLL’s inbox announcing the presentation of Real Madrid’s new signing just two hours before it was originally scheduled to take place. Suddenly LLL went from writing about Getafe’s victory the previous evening and Madrid’s terrible start to the season, to discussing the arrival of the new summer signing and...oh...LLL gets it now.

Modric didn't get quite the same welcome as Ronaldo did in 2009...

It’s no wonder that the mischievous Sport ran a provocative front page that suggested the presentation was “a 42 million euro smokescreen to cover shame,” referring to the Coliseum catastrophe the previous evening. When probed on such a notion, Emilio Butragueño - seated next to Modric in his role as the club’s Director of Institutional Relations - gave a cheeky smile and chuckle at the suggestion, before advising that the timing was mere coincidence. Modric, on the other hand, was starting to realise that he was entering the Spanish conspiracy mad house, with no chance of turning back now that he had signed his five-year deal.

As for what the former Tottenham star himself had to say in his opening press conference, several boxes on LLL's 'Player Presentation Bingo' card were quickly ticked. I’ve joined the best club in the world, I’ll always be grateful to my old club, I’ll play anyway the manager tells me too. But that last point is perhaps a little contentious. The Croatian was remarkably candid in where he expects to play - and that’s in Madrid’s central midfield and not poncing about anywhere else.

This will come as a bit of a shock to many in the Spanish football media, who see Modric as replacement for Kaká, and a kick up the jacksie to Mesut Özil, who they now perceive to be a dilettante, which doesn’t seem quite fair to LLL. Heck, even the fact that Modric was coming from White Hart Lane was a shock for one journalist, who had both the room and Modric laughing for slipping up and asking how the Croatian’s relationship with Arsenal was after a protracted transfer that “went on too long,” as Modric himself put it.

On Tuesday evening, Mourinho spoke ahead of the Super Cup second leg to perhaps ease Modric’s mind a little. “We know what his preferred position is and it’s logical that he plays in his position. He’s not a left back nor a striker, he’ll play in his position.”

The transfer has been well received in most quarters - in Madrid to be more specific, with a column in Barcelona’s Mundo Deportivo grumbling that Florentino Pérez was supposed to be buying Spanish - with a clinical Marca claiming that Modric will be the “brain to give fluidity to the Whites attack.”

“What this energetic and vigorous Madrid lacks is more elaborate play...in midfield and Modric offers this. Sahin did not succeed in this task but Mourinho asked for Modric. This is an advantage,” writes AS editor, Alfredo Relaño.

Nevertheless, Modric won’t be playing any part in Wednesday’s Barcelona clash. Instead it will mostly be the shower that have started the season. “My priority is to know whether what happened in Getafe was a one-off or to know if it’s a real problem with the psychological profile of some players or of the team,” warned Mourinho, who looks like he is not willing to tolerate a fourth game without a win to start the new campaign.

Good Day, Bad Day: Awful Athletic, mediocre Madrid, victorious Valladolid

2012-08-28T10:47:00Z

RESULTS Sat 25 Aug Malaga 1-1 Mallorca, Espanyol 1-0 Real Zaragoza, Real Betis 1-2 Rayo Vallecano, Real Sociedad 2-1 Celta Vigo Sun 26 Aug Valencia 3-3 Deportivo, Getafe 2-1 Real Madrid, Granada 1-1 Sevilla, Osasuna 1-2 Barcelona Mon 27 Aug Atletico Madrid 4-0 Athletic Bilbao, Real Valladolid 2-0 Levante

Good Day

Barcelona
The trouble with reviewing a team’s performance after knowing the final result is that it can skew the analysis a tad. A few bad passes and iffy finishes over the bar will have fans watching the match live thinking their team suck royally and are doomed. Knowing the scoreline means you know from the start that they are going to be all right in the end and all those little foibles don’t really matter.
That is the perspective of LLL, having missed most of Sunday's game in Getafe thanks to a transport ‘mare caused by unexpected engineering works (yes, they exist in Spain as well). So, instead we'll cast an eye over views from the Barça Twitter-verse - apparently Cesc Fabregas was awful, Andrés Iniesta was dodgy and even Leo Messi went partly missing. Mad Tomás Roncero of AS thinks the result forms part of the anti-Madrid refereeing conspiracy and that his team should be above Barça in the league table and that it just isn’t fair.

Valladolid
Second in the league! Imagine that! How did they do it? By winning their ‘winnable’ games against Zaragoza and Levante and by not conceding any goals. Easy, really.

Leo Baptistao
Has another new star been born? Last week 16-year-old Málaga forward Fabrice filled these particular boots. On Saturday, it was the Rayo winger (who turned 20 a day later) who set Vallecas hearts a flutter by scoring the winning goal away at Betis and by setting up the Madrid side’s first with a beautiful cross with the outside of his boot. LLL expected Rayo to be near the bottom of la Primera after a couple of matches, not third.

Falcao
With Atlético being Atlético - and really broke - you never know what will happen with the club and whether Falcao will still be there at the end of the transfer window. But if the lovely-haired one hangs around, then surely the Rojiblancos are a dead cert for third this season if his hat-trick form from Monday night continues? No? Oh. Fair enough.

Deportivo
The Galician side made a fantastic comeback against Valencia in a mad 3-3 draw - a shame no-one watched it, though, with the match finishing at nearly one in the morning - and another fantastic sign that Depor are going to be very watchable indeed this season after a couple of years of wandering in the tedium wilderness.

Tomer Hemed
At least someone out there seems to enjoy playing at 11 at night. The Mallorca forward bagged two last week in this time slot and managed another on Saturday in a 1-1 draw against Málaga.

Luis García
There’s nothing quite like seeing a big smile from the Getafe manager. It’s heart-warming stuff. We saw a massive one after last season’s victory against Barcelona last season when Getafe didn’t play especially well but came away with a victory. There was another on Sunday night under similar circumstances but when Real Madrid were the victims. Good to see the giant-killing spirit is back at the Coliseum club. Now if only they could focus on getting some fans in to watch it happen. €100 tickets ain’t going to do that.

Zaragoza
A quick response to last week’s rather disastrous home defeat to Valladolid with a victory which was very similar to last year’s wins that kept Zaragoza up in the end - scoring big, big, big goals, very, very, very late on. This time it was an 89th minute effort from Hélder Postiga.

Real Sociedad
How well la Real do this season depends an awful lot on what happens to Athletic Bilbao in the transfer market this week. Should their Basque brothers-in-arms lose Javi Martínez and Fernando Llorente, then the likes of Antoine Griezmann and Iñigo Martinez could be targeted just to make the Bilbao club feel a little bit better about themselves.
If Real Sociedad can resist any financial temptations from Athletic then the team should have a fairly solid campaign on their hands, thanks to some of the youngsters in the team gaining in experience from last year and an improvement in squad strength in depth with the recruitment of Carlos Vela and Chory Castro. Saturday’s 2-1 win over Celta was a little more fraught that necessary, but it was well deserved. In the meantime, let’s see how the next five days unfold for the San Sebastian side.

Bad Day

Betis
The Seville side continues to be arguably the most fun to watch at the moment, but sometimes the mad attacking anarchy doesn’t always go to plan. It did in the 5-3 win at San Mamés last weekend, but despite contributing to a completely barn-storming first half against Rayo, Betis died off a little and eventually lost 2-1. “Rayo won because they were better,” admitted a no-frills Betis coach, Pepe Mel.

Málaga
Not an ideal start at home for Málaga, with a 1-1 draw against Mallorca, but the priority for the southern side is trying to get a tiny bit of institutional stability and make sure there are no goofy moments in Tuesday’s Champions League qualifier second leg. “The team is well physically and will go into the game feeling good,” said a chirpy Málaga manager, Manuel Pellegrini. Oh. They probably need a striker, too. And not Javier Saviola.

Valencia
Perhaps LLL’s brain is playing tricks, but the blog is sure it heard the first boos of the season in Mestalla for Valencia’s first game of the season. They arrived when Deportivo scored with Valencia 2-0 up. Perhaps the notoriously fickle fans knew that a collapse was on the horizon with Valencia eventually blowing a 3-1 lead. Or perhaps it’s simply the case that the supporters are never, ever, ever, ever, ever going to be happy with their team.

Celta Vigo
The record shows two defeats in two matches for the new boys of Celta which is hardly the ideal start for a club that will be looking for an early caffeine hit of confidence in the new campaign. Although Celta took the lead in the defeat against Real Sociedad, the team really should have been behind in the first half with manager, Paco Herrera, admitting that “I didn’t recognise them.” Still, there are reasons to believe that Celta will snap out of their unimpressive opening as from what LLL has seen from them in the first two games, the Galicians ain’t all bad.

Real Madrid
It’s not that Real Madrid were particularly horrendous on Sunday against Getafe - Levante at home about four years ago has to be the very bottom of the barrel in terms of performances - it’s just that the side played with the same rather lacklustre intensity and speed as their opponents, but without the finish.
The Bernabeu side were a sort of footballing Donald Sutherland body snatchers. In the second half though, there was a hint of blind panic with a forward line of six and poor Xabi Alonso left alone in midfield having to ping long balls up to them with no-one else to count on as support. A five point gap to Barcelona is by no means fatal with just two matches gone, but Madrid really need to buck their ideas up sharpish. LLL has a feeling that was the gist of the post-match message from Mourinho after Sunday’s defeat.

Espanyol
Looks like Paul from Barcelona may still be on hols, or given up on the whole Espanyol business, so LLL will simply quote the match report from AS after the home defeat to Zaragoza of all teams - “right now, they are the worst Espanyol team in years.” Which does sound a little unfair.

Osasuna
José Luis Mendilibar was most unhappy with the referee after the match in blaming him for failing to spot an offside and getting in his player’s way for Barça’s first goal. This was added to the frustration of seeing his team managing a fine game against Barcelona but having no reward in the end. “We played like never before and we lost like we also do,” sighed the Osasuna manager.

Athletic Bilbao
There really isn’t enough room here - or energy from a sleepy blog - to discuss in depth what’s going on at Athletic and why they are at the bottom of the table. But in the 4-0 defeat to Atlético Madrid on Monday night, there was no passion, no pressure and no effort. And no Javi Martínez and Fernando Llorente, either. Marcelo Bielsa was still crouching an awful lot, though. At least some things have stayed the same from last season.

La Preview: Valdés under fire, Rayo head on the run and emergency boots

2012-08-24T09:58:00Z

Saturday

Real Sociedad v Celta Vigo - 19.00 CEST
What spirit! What gusto! What beautiful madness! Despite being tonked 5-1 on the opening day of the season, hopes are still high in sunny San Sebastian that this will be a great campaign for la Real. That’s certainly the feeling of Asier Illarramendi, who boasted this week that “we are still capable of great things and can be the revelation team of la Liga.”
Unfortunately, the midfielder undoes some of this marvelous work though when warning that “what can’t do is think that our objective is Europe, as there are a lot of teams with this goal and if we think about this then we can put put extra pressure on ourselves that could cost us.”
LLL Prediction - Home win

Betis v Rayo Vallecano - 21.00
Former Rayo owner and ‘colourful’ businessman José María Ruiz-Mateos made the news in Madrid this week, when he was arrested at his home. It’s not the first time this particular gentleman has been in trouble with the law due to corruption cases over the year, including a spell in the slammer for tax evasion and currency smuggling, but this time Ruiz-Mateos had his collar felt by the Fuzz for failing to turn up on court for his latest fraud case. His excuse? A bad toe prevented him from making the trip to meet the judge.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Espanyol v Zaragoza - 21.00
Nervy times at Espanyol these days. The club's finances aren't looking so hot, the numbers of season ticket holders have dropped, players are stalling on contract extensions and the aging Simao is the figure the club are putting their hopes on to avoid a nasty relegation battle. However, Verdú, is still feeling cheerful - as well he might as he will be free at the end of the campaign - by claiming that "this team wants more than just staying up, although the first priority is to get 40 odd points."
LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga v Mallorca - 23.00
A whopping sigh of relief in the Málaga camp after a 2-0 win in the team’s opening Champions League qualifying tie against Panathinaikos, a couple of matches which could be worth €15m to the apparently cash-strapped Andalusians. However, it’s now back to the reality of la Liga and having to play a match at 11 at night, something the normally placcid Manuel Pellegrini is not ats all happy about. “Let’s see if other teams like Barcelona, Madrid or Valencia have to play on a Saturday night at 11 if they have a Champions League game on Tuesday.”
LLL says hush to the Chilean, and quotes a Tweet from the league’s VP, Javier Tebas, when saying that it’s important that there’s a balance between the fans in the stadium and those watching TV. In a sense, it’s job done. Both sets of supporters are unhappy.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Sunday

Osasuna v Barcelona - 19.00
If poor Víctor Valdés had a bit of a mare against Real Madrid in the final minutes of Thursday night's game, then he is sure to be in for more of the same treatment up in Pamplona, with Osasuna loving to play in the opponent's faces. Váldes is largely being scapegoated for his slip-up that has allowed Real Madrid a chance at the Bernabeu next week, but LLL feels it's a little unfair on the moody keeper as it was a horrendous back pass from Adriano that put him in some trouble. Plus as Tito Vilanova pointed out "we ask him to always play the ball out from the back," an instinct that prevented Valdés from the more sensible option of wellying the ball into the stands.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Getafe v Real Madrid - 21.00
'Got away with that one', that's the vibe in the Spanish capital after a sprightly Super Cup clash at the Camp Nou that is pleasantly open but certainly shouldn't be. An AS headline clumsily translated by LLL claims that "Víctor Valdés gets the ticket office" going ahead of Wednesday's game which could have been a bit of a alate night dead rubber, had the Barça keeper not had an unfortunate moment with the scores at 3-1 and Barcelona on the ascendency. Mundo Deportivo sort of agrees with this assessment with the bitter sweet headline of "a victory with a gift."
LLL Prediction - Away win

Granada v Sevilla - 21.00
One of the more curious transfer stories to appear in the papers this week popped up in AS with Jesús Navas apparently tempting Arsenal into making a €15m bid. It would be even more bad news for la Liga with other non-big two star leaving Spanish shores for the Premier League, but probably also for Arsenal too with the notoriously home-sick suffering midfielder making José Antonio Reyes like Alan Whicker in comparison.
LLL Prediction - Away win

Valencia v Deportivo - 23.00
It’s Valencia’s turn to demonstrate that it’s not just the push-over, face-kicked-in-the-sand weedy boys like Atlético Madrid and Levante who are forced to play at 11 at night on a Sunday, but the big boys too. Valencia’s match which runs over two days, etc, has been met with some scorn by new fullback, Joao Pereira, who has come to Spain and thinks he can tell the locals how to go about their business despite the Johnny Come Lately only being in la Liga for a few weeks.
“It’s the first time I’ve played at 11 at night. In Portugal, it’s considered late when you play at a quarter-past-nine. It’s a time to be going to sleep like Falcao said. It’s bad for fans, How is a 10-year-old kid going to see a match at this time? It’s not good for football,” claimed the Portuguese.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Monday

Valladolid v Levante - 20.00
It was with a tear in the eye that the proud LLL waved Levante off for Thursday’s Europa League clash with Motherwell. Unfortunately, the blog then had to spend a couple hours standing around with the Valencia side’s squad being delayed due to visa issues for Pape Diop. But, it didn’t matter a hammock of figs in the end, with super Levante taking a 2-0 win back to Spain and the chance to overstretch themselves in the Europa League and end up in a relegation battle, Ipswich Town style.
LLL Prediction - Draw

Atlético Madrid v Athletic Bilbao - 22.00
While Athletic’s glum news has surrounded the possible departure of two stars in Fernando Llorente and Javi Martínez, Atlético buzz concerns the arrival of a brand new one (seamless link, there). Sprightly 17-year-old midfielder Oliver Torres (no relation), made his league debut in the rather flat 1-1 draw against Levante on Sunday night and has been the topic of gushing reports concerning his background, including a photo of his home on the outskirts of Madrid. The youngster who first made an Atlético squad at the end of April was less than enthusiastic about his appearance though tweeting that “I was nervous, I’ve had better games.”
The wee nipper than found out how football fans are quite, quite mad by having to defend himself after being photographed in Real Madrid’s store at the Santiago Bernabeu. “I needed football boots in an emergency, don’t doubt the Atlético (fan) that I am.” There was no news on whether Kaká was being put to good use behind one of the cash registers.
LLL Prediction - Home win

Super Cup sort of opens spanking new Spanish season

2012-08-23T13:39:00Z

Woot! Woot! It’s Spanish Super Cup time! It’s the traditional curtain raiser to the new season in Spain, a chance for Barcelona and Real Madrid to begin yet another year of bickering, animosity and occasional physical assaults.

Well, three out of four elements of that statements are true. Thursday’s clash is not actually the curtain raiser to the new season in La Liga, rather a two-o’clock-in-the-afternoon, scratching-your-bum-while-peeking-through-the-curtains type affair a few days after the new campaign has already begun.

In displaying the sort of scheduling prowess that plonked last season’s Copa del Rey final between Barcelona and Athletic Bilbao one day before Spain’s first pre-Euro 2012 friendly, the Spanish FA have put this double-headed battle after the season’s already started. Although in their defence, they weren’t helped by the league starting a good fortnight earlier than usual.

Indeed, even Thursday wasn’t a great time to schedule the match - nor next Wednesday - as the kick-off times are at 22:30 local time at the Camp Nou and Santiago Bernabeu in order to avoid clashing with European fixtures taking place elsewhere in the continent. Nobody wants to feel the wrath of Michel Platini after a Clásico steals the thunder of Luzern against Genk.

Rather like the Copa del Rey clashes last season, there is the sense that neither game is particular welcome by the managerial pair of the two feuding clubs. Indeed, both José Mourinho and Tito Vilanova would perhaps have been disappointed by the decision of the FA to overturn their respective touchline bans for the ruckus at the end of last season’s stormy affair.

For Mourinho, it’s an unwanted distraction from a league campaign some of his players have started looking a little sluggish. Marca even claim Cristiano Ronaldo would like another 10 days to get up to speed - if that’s OK with everyone else, that is. “If I could I’d sign up for losing the Super Cup and losing the league,” declared Mourinho on Wednesday. “It’s the least important competition of the four that we are playing in.

In Vilanova’s footballing badminton court, a bad result over the two games could undue some of the confidence building good work done in Barça’s 5-1 victory over Real Sociedad, which showed that it was business as usual at the Camp Nou for at least one weekend in the club’s post Pep world. However, ‘Pito’, as Mourinho called him in the competition last year, won’t have any such defeatist nonsense declaring that a “title is a title.”

That’s particularly true when these two teams are involved and bragging rights are up for grabs.

Complete and utter shock in Spain as midnight football proves rather unpopular

2012-08-21T11:10:00Z

Ah, midnight on a Monday. The witching hour. A time for luurve, romance or perhaps just getting some shut-eye on a school night. What better moment to start the second half of Zaragoza against Valladolid? That’s what LLL was considering over the summer, so it’s a big pat on the back to those running the game in Spain for matching the blog’s machinations with the scheduling of the final match in the first round of la Liga so LLL’s dream could come true.

Around 11,000 fans were also full of glee at the timing of the game, and went along to La Romareda before all trying to share the same taxi back home. However, there were some glum faces. A soporific Zaragoza missed the night-time adapted, but long since departed Jermaine Pennant, who would have been perfect for this match, and lost 1-0 at home to a Valladolid side who themselves managed to miss a penalty. “We have to improve, our opponents aren’t going to wait for us and we came late into the game,” admitted Manolo Jiménez.

The away win will be a bit of a boost for Valladolid, who have only just come up but may still go straight back down. The sweet smell of victory for the newly promoted team was shared by Deportivo, who played at the more reasonable hour of seven on Monday evening, and were a far cry from the awful, awful, awful version of the team that Miguel Angel Lotina took down fifteen months back before repeating the same crazy trick with Villarreal in May. The outfit was so different under José Luis Oltra that Deportivo played with actual strikers. Imagine that!

Unfortunately for Deportivo, one of them is still Riki, who botched a penalty but made amends by scuffing a shot under Osasuna’s Andrés Fernández. Deportivo then romped to a 2-0 win in the final seconds of the match to leave the Galicians in third at this early, early stage. “This result doesn’t change our perspective,” admitted the Deportivo boss, who shares the same gloom-filled view of the world as his predecessor, it seems. “This is a long and difficult year.”

Rayo began their campaign with a victory over Granada, but only by the hairs of the club’s debt-ridden chinny-chin-chin with Roberto Trashorras whacking in a free kick in injury time. “On the whole I’m happy, but not completely satisfied,” said another happy camper in the form of new Rayo boss, Páco Jémez. Also completely unsatisfied where the club’s ever-imaginative Ultras who protested about the 9pm kick-off time by unfurling an unrepeatable banner concerning the League’s Vice President and his mother.

AS saved LLL a lot of effort by calculating that the ten stadiums hosting games on the opening weekend (and Monday evening) were only at 61% capacity weekend, down from 70% last season, when matches where held on the weekend of 27/28th August. The attendance at Sevilla reached just 20,000, while Barcelona only managed 57,000 at their game against Real Sociedad in the Camp Nou. The three games kicking off at 11pm saw the unsurprising result of just 31% capacity - a poor performance that will only encourage those setting the kick-off times next August, rather than persuading them that the whole weekend was a bit of a mess and that they should sit in the corner to reconsider the unconventional decisions that they made.

Good Day, Bad Day: Villa returns, Málaga's boy wonder, no-sweat for Jose

Good Day, Bad Day: Villa returns, Málaga's boy wonder, no-sweat for Jose

2012-08-20T11:12:00Z

RESULTS Sat 18 Aug Celta Vigo 0-1 Malaga, Sevilla 2-1 Getafe, Mallorca 2-1 Espanyol Sun 19 Aug Athletic Bilbao 3-5 Real Betis, Real Madrid 1-1 Valencia, Barcelona 5-1 Real Sociedad, Levante 1-1 Atletico Madrid.

Good Day

Leo Messi
As José Mourinho was preparing to explain away a draw and a poor performance from Cristiano Ronaldo at the Santiago Bernabeu, Barcelona and Messi were already tanning Real Sociedad’s hides in a performance that was, as the Spanish like to say, a real thump on the table. However, context and timing is everything in this case - supporters shouldn’t get too overexcited and smug yet, as this is a result that could have taken place just as easily in January as the first clash of the new campaign.

David Villa
A fine night for the returning forward, who scored just ten minutes after coming onto the pitch as a second half substitute. Woot!

Gonzalo Higuaín
The league campaign opener for the Argentinean saw Higuaín equalling the real Ronaldo’s total of 104 official goals for Real Madrid. ‘Shame it took him six years’ was the typically sniffy response from Marca’s Miguel Serrano, never the biggest of fans of the Ramón Calderón-signed footballer.

José Mourinho’s deodorant
When the Real Madrid manager arrived on the touch-line in a light blue shirt with temperatures topping 40 degrees, LLL was certain it was going to be icky, soggy pits ahoy. But once again, LLL was proved wrong in its predictions, with Mourinho as fresh as a daisy during Saturday’s draw.

Diego Alves
LLL has been a fan of the Valencia keeper from back in his Almería days, so very much enjoyed a masterful performance in which nearly everything Real Madrid chucked the Brazilian’s way was blocked. Even the home side’s goal took three attempts thanks to a double intervention from Alves. “Just doing my job,” whistled the goalkeeper after the game.

Fabrice Olinga
The Cameroon striker became the league’s youngest scorer at just 16 years and 98 days, beating the scrunch-faced Iker Muniain in the process, so a fine pat on the back for the wee nipper. But perhaps what should also be making the headlines is the fact that Málaga, who started the summer with talk of Gonzalo Higuaín up front, are currently reliant on goals from a youth academy player, whose residency permit they forgot to renew last week meaning the club was blooming lucky he was even able to play against Celta Vigo in Saturday’s win.

Sevilla
“Good things and bad things,” were the musings of Míchel the Manager after Sevilla’s 2-1 win over Getafe. The good being a sprightly show from Ivan Rakitic, who recently admitted that he needed to pull his Croatian socks up, and a fine diving performance from José Antonio Reyes in winning a penalty for Sevilla’s second goal, that was converted by Alvaro Negredo.

Tomer Hedved
The Israeli striker scored a brace on his league debut for Mallorca - one goal on the Saturday night of the 11pm kick-off and one strike on the Sunday. Welcome to Spain. Not the most sensible of times, was the verdict of Joaquín Caparrós on the scheduling of Saturday game.

Levante
LLL must admit that this 11pm kick-off was recorded on the grounds that the blog has better things to do - such as sleep. It is running in the background at the moment and the game appears to be just drifting by. Which is not that surprising, really. Still, it’s an early point for Levante and a sign that the team could be as resilient as ever.

Betis
The Seville side really do play some lovely stuff when they are in the mood and the opposition defence stands off as much as Athletic’s did in Sunday’s completely mad 5-3 victory. Defending set-pieces is still an issue though, as Betis found when Mikel San José headed in two corners, but as Pepe Mel admitted, “last season we were the second smallest team in Europe.” They still are, apparently.

Bad Day

Cristiano Ronaldo
A sluggish, disinterested display against Valencia from the forward who admits that the season has come a little bit too early for him. “I’m not 100%, but I hope to get there soon,” said the Portuguese, who summed up the performance of the whole team who, as José Mourinho said, did enough to win the match with the chances created but weren’t that great over all.

Celta Vigo
It’s never pleasant to lose at home on the opening day, especially to a newly promoted team, but Celta fans have enough reason to be fairly pleased by the performance of the players, if not Saturday’s result. “We matched a Champions League team,” noted Iago Aspas who was one of a few to miss chances in the 1-0 defeat. “I’m getting kicked less in la Primera than the Segunda,” was another sunbeam of hope for the forward.

Atlético Madrid
More dropped points away from home, this time against Levante. “We wanted more, but we are starting with a point against a rival who are very organised, so it’s not all bad,” admitted Diego Simeone.

Athletic Bilbao
With the transfer speculation and fan animosity surrounding Fernando Llorente and Javi Martínez causing Marcelo Bielsa to drop the pair for Sunday’s Betis clash, LLL suspected that an away win or at least a draw was on the cards for the visitors. It was sort of right on both counts, but it certainly didn’t expect such an awful start for Athletic who conceded three first half goals before pulling things back and then conceding two more late on to lose 5-3. Worrying signs of a tough second season for El Loco in San Mamés.

La Liga clubs up in arms as Primera matches set for midnight kick-offs

2012-08-02T13:31:00Z

Not too long ago, La Liga Loca chewed on the bold notion that those running the game in Spain were boosting its popularity around the world by introducing professional wrestling style shenanigans into the la Liga rulebook to liven things up a bit.

That was the only conclusion the blog could draw from the decision to allow José Mourinho to escape completely unpunished for his eye-rummaging antics on ‘Pito’ Vilanova during last season’s Spanish Super Cup.

The-Powers-that-Be of la Liga have pushed the boat out even further to sell the game to the non-Spanish audiences, by scheduling matches in August at 11o’clock at night, the highlight of their genius being Zaragoza against Valladolid finishing at about one in the morning on Tuesday 21st August.

Marca suspect it’s all a cunning plan to encourage supporters into the grounds during tough economic times by combining it with the nightclubbing experience, thus allowing Primera punters to kill two fun-time birds with one stone and save some bucks in the process. Discussing the disbelieving reactions to the announcements made by the Spanish League on Wednesday, Marca muses that many “believe football to be a sport to be played - and seen - at decent hours and not as if it were a show with a DJ included.”

This complete lunacy stems from the decision was made to begin la Primera in the middle of August, a good two weeks earlier than normal, when it is far too hot and when nearly everyone in the country is on holiday, and thus not around to sit and watch games past midnight on a work-night.

Therefore the logical decision made in regards to the heat was not to rethink the whole concept and start a fortnight later, but play the matches in the middle of the night - brilliant logic, to be fair. Although the 20 clubs on la Liga fail to agree on much, especially in terms of TV rights, almost everyone is fed-up with the decision that has been made - aside from Real Madrid and Barcelona, perhaps, who will be kicking off their matches on the first weekend at 19.00 and 21.00 respectively.

Málaga supporters won’t really give a flying fig about that as they have bigger fish to fry in regards to the very gloomy immediate future for the club. The owners have apparently gone AWOL, leaving no-one with a clue what's happening. “There’s a lot of uncertainty as we know the same as anyone else, nothing” admitted defender, Weligton, returning from a tour of Venezuela.

There was talk of a possible strike by the playing staff, but for the moment the footballers are continuing to train with forward, Rondón, saying; “we’ve decided not to stop as there are 17 days left before the start of the season.”

It’s a beginning to what was supposed to be an exciting campaign that Málaga will be facing without Santi Cazorla who is set to sign for Arsenal any second now, to seal a couple of days that has not seen Spanish football in its best light.

Another fine mess down in Málaga as Albanian takeover bid dismissed

2012-07-31T10:35:00Z

What a mess. That’s the best description of Málaga at the moment. Heck, even themusually unflappable Manuel Pellegrini sounds thoroughly flapped, with the manager confessing during the club's tour in Venezuela that “these rumours are affecting us.”

The rumours in question concerned the visit of a representative of Málaga’s owner Sheikh Al Thani to the city late last week. It is suggested this house call wasn't made in order to pay the players, former owner and fellow clubs the money still owed to them, but instead to put the club up for sale, with stories over the weekend suggesting Albanian oil magnate Rezart Taçi is part of a consortium looking into taking the troubled team off the Qatari’s hands.

But not so, it now appears, with a director of Taçi Oil International denying any interest in such a deal; “I’ve read the story in the press and I am surprised. We have had and we have no interest in buying Málaga.”

This leaves Málaga on very wobbly footing - an owner who has either lost interest in the club or can no longer afford to run it, reported debts of up to €90m, some high-salaried and unhappy stars such as Santi Cazorla pushing for moves, and debts to third party clubs and players that could lead to Málaga being booted out of European competition or even relegated from la Primera, with the Spanish FA and league recently becoming a lot more hard-ball over such affairs.

Another club struggling with a lack of Arab cash is Getafe, whose whole Getafe Team Dubai business turned out to be a giant scam, with arrests made and a police investigation ongoing. This has left club president, Angel Torres, as blunt and grumpy sounding as ever, telling his coach Luis García that he needs to sell before he can buy.

“The idea is to move on Miku, Colunga or Güiza, if no one goes, there’ll be no-one coming,” stropped Torres. “Luis knows he is at a modest club and I think he has a great team. He needs to be patient and not to talk so much to the press about what he wants or what he’s missing.”

This rather glum round-up of the unfortunate state of la Primera’s finances ends with the tragic-comedy figure of Ever Banega, who is continuing his personal battle against the automobile - a fight he is losing badly.

After being run over by his own car at a petrol station in February, breaking his ankle in the process, the Valencia midfielder had another unfortunate moment on Monday, when his Ferrari caught fire with him in it. Fortunately, our hapless hero escaped unscathed, whilst the fire brigade began to take care of his very scorched chick magnet.

Manuel Pellegrini unhappy as uncertainty continues to surround Málaga

2012-07-27T09:52:00Z

One of the many unjustified reasons for much of the Spanish football press not liking the cut of Manuel Pellegrini’s gib during his year as Real Madrid manager was that he was considered rather dull. The Chilean’s pre and post match press conferences would be sparsely attended, uneventful affairs, free from the referee-blaming, Barça-insulting, shrugging and pouting that every one has so grown to love in the José 'Porque!' Mourinho era.

But when the wrinkly manager does stick his head above the parapet, people tend to listen, and that’s what has happened when the Málaga coach spoke during the club’s tour of Venezuela, announcing that he’s not exactly happy with the goings on his club at present. He explained that he was particularly irked by the reported problems paying the current players' wages, paying off the remaining installments on the transfer fees of players they already have, and paying for the players they'll need for a potential Champions League campaign.

“We are all waiting for Abdullah Ghubn (Málaga vice-president) or an envoy to come and try to sort out in the institutions in a lot of aspects,” grumbled Pellegrini at a conference on Thursday. “Too much time has passed, there are a lot of problems that need fixing, and a lot of things that need creating and improving.”

Another angry bee buzzing around the Málaga man’s bonnet is the transfer speculation concerning Santi Cazorla, with Arsenal poking about in the hull of the club to see if it’s a sinking ship. “Selling Cazorla for €20m would be a give-away. I don’t think that the club has any intention of selling him. It would be disrespecting the intention to play in the Champions League.”

Although Sheikh Al-Thani has protested through Twitter that stories regarding Málaga’s cash flow problems are merely the result of a jealous press in Madrid or plain, old racism against Arab owners, this outburst from a normally extremely political figure such as Manuel Pellegrini simply can’t be ignored.

This comes on top of the resignation in May of Sporting Director Fernando Hierro, who said that he was 'very uncomfortable’ with some aspects of the club’s running. It doesn’t take a lot to guess that this is the financial side with another of claims from clubs saying that money is still owed for the likes of Nacho Monreal, Isco and Cazorla, on top of the footballers themselves moaning that wages are owed.

Pellegrini looks like getting what he wanted, with Sheikh Al Thani sending a representative in the form of Moayad Shatat to the city - preferably with a well-stocked cheque book - to resolve all these problems, as well as the €3.5m that is now due to former Málaga owner, Fernando Sanz, from the sale of the club two years ago. But it may be a little late in the day for as AS note “a lot of issues to fix but little time before the league and Champions League begin.”

Crazy talk about Kaká as Dani Alves unloads

2012-07-26T11:22:00Z

“New York, London, Paris, Munich, everyone talks about...errrm...Kaká!”

Spanish transfer tittle-tattle has gone all retro, “Pop Musik” in relation to Real Madrid’s bench-warming salary-sucker, who is on a merry-go-round of stories linking the forward with Corinthians, New York Red Bulls and AC Milan.

Thursday’s Marca reports that Kaká’s agent held talks on Wednesday with Milan’s über-lord Adriano Galliani, with the aim of sealing a €13m return to Serie A for a player who would be considered a spring chicken by San Siro standards. The previous day’s edition of the same paper had the Red Bulls eyeing up Kaká, who could spend a pleasant year or so walking the streets of Manhattan with Pep Guardiola, perhaps.

This has made a wonderful change from seeing Luka Modric’s face on the front pages, with the Spanish press a tad confused as to what’s happening with the unsettled Spurs man.

Over in the Catalan capital, the news has flitted between David Villa and Carles Puyol getting back to fitness, and Leo Messi missing out on a friendly against Hamburg on Tuesday due to injury (an absence that cost €360,000 in appearance money for Barcelona). Then there's the very sad cruciate ligament injury to defender Marc Muniesa, which sees the 20-year-old sidelined for six months, and Dani Alves saying that all was well after apparently feeling let down over the summer when his club didn't back him in the face of reports they had lost confidence in the cheeky chappy.

“Everything has been fixed,” said the fullback on Wednesday. “What I wanted to do was express my unhappiness to the boss, so that’s why I did it. But now we’ve spoken and it’s all sorted.”

Joan Vehils writes in ‘Sport’ that this kind of rebellious business need to crushed into itty-bitty pieces under the boots of the club's top brass. “Tito and his strong men need to be benevolent (to the fans) and show that the dressing room does not exist outside the margins of the directions of the club’s communication department.”

Mundo Deportivo are unhappy at the reaction of Spain’s TV channels to Real Madrid’s 5-1 friendly victory over Oviedo, and Tito Vilanova’s debut at Hamburg - a tougher opponent, to be sure - which produced a 2-1 victory for Barcelona. “In general, an abundance of optimism and winning power for Real Madrid and injuries, bad luck and controversy for Barça. And these were just friendlies. It’s beginning well,” notes a downbeat Mònica Planas.

It’s been far too long since LLL has been able to laugh at Atlético Madrid’s expense, due to that pesky Europa League-winning business, but the blog got the opportunity on Wednesday, when the Rojiblancos suffered a 1-0 defeat at newly-promoted Celta Vigo. The blog wasn’t going to watch the game in a million years, but Gareth Nunn from the excellent Madridatleticos website saw enough and confirmed that “you can understand how the game went when you see that Raul García was one of the better players on the pitch.”

All quiet on the transfer front: Primera Liga as cash-strapped as Spain

2012-07-24T10:34:00Z

It may not be the best thing to say in terms of enticing people to eagerly read the next few hundred words, but examining an actual jammed-into-the-side-of-a-house window - from the wooden frame, to the cleanliness of the glass - is more thrilling that peering at this summer's transfer window in Spain.

Even the Russian Premier League has invested more cash than La Primera, which is currently 'in the black' in terms of the aggregate transfer values in and out of the division and has thusly been outspent by the English second tier, the Npower Championship.

Since the move of Jordi Alba to Barcelona, the only story making regular headlines in the big sports papers is the Luka Modric to Real Madrid saga; the tale of a player José Mourinho perceives as a nice-to-have trinket who would probably play the odd 20 minutes here and then against Osasuna, rather than a man who'll play every single minute of every single match. In fact, that’s the role which has been performed superbly by Kaká of late, but perhaps not for much longer.

Tuesday’s Marca shows the Brazilian and his father arriving at the Santiago Bernabeu to be told that his chances of first-team football will be severely limited during the upcoming campaign and that it may be best if he take his €11 million net a year salary elsewhere. To Corinthians perhaps. Or Milan. Or even Paris Saint Germain, the big money-bags club this summer.

In fact, Real Madrid are showing a sizable profit in their dealings so far, having sold Dani Carvajal, Hamit Altintop, Sergio Canales and Lady Gago for a total of about €20 million, roughly half of what Spurs are reportedly asking for their midfield moaner.

Barcelona still have some cash in the kitty to buy a centre-back, while Málaga are really letting the side down, having invested nada so far, having suffered massive cash flow problems which have prevented them from paying some of their big name players, along with the clubs they came from.

Osasuna have just dropped a present into the southern side’s lap - trousers becoming threadbare? - with a legal claim for money owed from last summer’s transfer of Nacho Monreal. The Pamplona side’s urgent need for funds is not that surprising considering it has been announced that the local council will no longer be chipping in €1.4 million a year on the reasonable grounds that it, along with the rest of Spain, is completely skint.

Overall, 11 Primera clubs are reflecting a positive balance or a zero spend from their transfer dealings in the close season, and when one of them happens to be Real Madrid, you know that there’s something stingy in the air with la Liga reflecting the cash-strapped nature of the entire country and battening down the financial hatches.

A whizz around the grounds - Málaga to Real Madrid

2012-07-18T11:14:00Z

FourFourTwo's man in Madrid, Tim Stannard, continues his summer round-up...

Málaga
In enormous contrast to last summer when it was ‘buy, buy, buy’ for Málaga with a series of seasonal signings, we’ve not heard a peep from the southern side this year. This may be something to do with the club apparently having a bit of a cash flow issue, with the president of the Spanish footballers’ union, Luis Rubiales, revealing Málaga’s players are owed 35% to 40% of their contracts. This comes after the departure of Fernando Hierro, who left after reportedly becoming a tad uncomfortable with how the finances of the club were run. However, it hasn’t stopped transfer speculation over the purchase of Alvaro Negredo from Sevilla, but also the possible departure of Rondón to Spurs, a peculiar move considering goals were a bit of problem for Málaga last season.

Mallorca
Joan Caparrós thinks he has the best squad in la Primera, and who is LLL to question a man of such genius? This is an opinion shared by defender, Nunes, who joshed that “Barcelona and Real Madrid are going to find it difficult to win the league or even get into Europe. It’s going to be hard as the league is very difficult.” The blog is even more convinced the Primera pair are both present and correct having noted that striker extraordinaire, Javier Arizmendi, has been added to Mallorca’s ranks, along with former Atlético Madrid left-back, Antonio López and Espanyol’s Javi Márquez. Leaving the Balearic club is Chori Castro who has moved to Real Sociedad and Martí Crespí who departs on a free.

Osasuna
New Osasuna president Miguel Archanco has said that his club are in a “war economy”, as is the case every year in Pamplona, there isn’t a lot of cash slopping about for transfers. Big-jawed, ginger defender Sergio has dropped a division to join Sporting, while Raul García has returned to Atlético Madrid after a loan spell, something that could be an issue next season, as the attacking midfielder was key to a fine campaign. Emiliano Armenteros has come in from Sevilla on a free, along with former Rayo centre-back Alejandro Arribas. There’s also been a bit of closet cleaning with Sisi and Nano leaving the club, too.

Rayo Vallecano
Mmm. It's been a troubling summer for Rayo Vallecano, with the biggest change being in the managerial hotseat, with José Sandoval leaving and former Cordoba boss Paco Jémez taking over. Michu looks on the brink of going to Swansea; Diego Costa and Joel have returned to Atlético Madrid on loan, while Raúl Tamudo has left for the Mexican league. Five youth team players have been promoted while ‘son of Míchel’, Adrián González joins the Rayo people’s revolution ahead of the new campaign. More moves needed urgently.

Real Madrid
Tremendously quite at the Valdebebas these days, with Real Madrid yet to make any major moves. Gonzalo Higuaín appears to be staying after all, leaving José Mourinho with the job of trying to offload Kaká and Ricardo Carvalho - Hamit Altintop has been flogged to Galatasaray - along with Lady Gago, who returns from a loan spell from Roma bearing a ‘remember me?’ t-shirt. Transfer gossip has focussed on Tottenham's Luka Modric, who has had his summer holidays ruined by the constant pestering of the Spanish press. There is also talk of a move for Inter fullback, Maicon.

Part One: Athletic Bilbao to Celta Vigo
Part Two: Deportivo to Levante