Harry Kane has played against Leicester 13 times and scored 14 goals – and not just for Spurs, either. A younger Kane netted on loan for Millwall at The Den, before his own largely unsuccessful stint with the Foxes, and since then he's only failed to net in three Premier League meetings against the Foxes.
These players are every fan's worst nightmare - the kind you know will ruin your afternoon whether he's on the pitch for 30 seconds or an hour, and there's nothing you can do about it.
Your mates will forever tell you that 'X' always scores against their team – but do they really? If your team features (and some do repeatedly, we're afraid), we're sorry. If it doesn't and you think we've missed someone off, don't hesitate to tweet us at @FourFourTwo and we'll add them to the list...
Romelu Lukaku vs West Ham
Apps: 15. Goals: 11. Games scored in: 10.
The burly Belgian didn't net in his first two appearances against the Hammers, during his 2012/13 loan spell at West Brom, but has tormented them ever since. Lukaku has bagged in 10 of his last 13 appearances against West Ham, although didn't get one in either appearance for Manchester United in 2018/19.
In 2015/16 he became the first player in Premier League history to score in six consecutive games against an opponent for the same club.
David Nugent vs Ipswich
Apps: 18. Goals: 15. Games scored in: 12.
For years, Nugent was Ipswich's Public Enemy No.1. The former England haunted the Tractor Boys with four different clubs – Preston, Portsmouth, Leicester and Boro – and only in 2018/19 did he fail to score at Portman Road. He's only ever been on the losing side once in 18 matches.
He even bagged at Portman Road for England U21s in 2006, when Theo Walcott became the age group’s youngest-ever scorer against Moldova.
“You could say they are one of my favourite teams to play against,” he once chuckled, before netting a brace the following day. “I made my debut for Preston at home against them and scored, and it’s kicked on from there. It's weird.”
Everyone else vs Ipswich
Let’s just get their misery out the way. While Nugent might be their modern-day nemesis, there’ve been others before him…
Apps: 8. Goals: 10. Games scored in: 6.
Andy Cole terrorised the Tractor Boys in his Premier League days with Newcastle and Manchester United. His first four appearances against them all produced strikes, the fourth being his famous five-goal haul in the Old Trafford side’s record 9-0 thumping. He wouldn’t face them for another six seasons, eventually giving them rare respite for a game in 2000/01, before netting for both United and Blackburn in 2001/02.
Apps: 5. Goals: 8. Games scored in: 4.
Only in Ian Wright’s first game against Ipswich, in 1992/93, did he not net against them. In the two campaigns that followed he smashed in eight goals, including hat-tricks in both seasons as Arsenal ran riot.
Apps: 6. Goals: 6. Games scored in: 5.
James Beattie only failed to bag against Ipswich once, in a 3-0 defeat for Southampton back in 2000/01. He’d netted in the reverse fixture, though, and did it again the following season, before striking on each of the three occasions he played against them for Sheffield United in the Championship.
Robin van Persie vs Stoke, Blackburn
Apps: 12. Goals: 11. Games scored in: 10.
No player in English football had scored in eight successive league appearances against a single opponent until the Dutchman did just that against Stoke in February 2014. He bagged a third-round FA Cup winner against the Potters in his first appearance, and had only failed to score in his first league outing against them until his final two appearances for a United side on the slide.
Apps: 13. Goals: 13. Games scored in: 9.
Blackburn have conceded even more against the formerly prolific striker. Van Persie found the net in eight of his nine first appearances against the Lancashire outfit, including two braces, and most recently plundered a hat-trick in Arsenal’s 7-1 win in 2011/12.
Didier Drogba vs Arsenal
Apps: 15. Goals: 13. Games scored in: 8.
Drogba’s goals against the Gunners meant he was only ever on the losing side once – the last appearance of his first spell in west London. The Ivorian netted in five league games against Arsene Wenger’s men – three of them braces – and again in the FA Cup, League Cup and Community Shield (including another two doubles). Forever Arsene’s nightmare.
Michael Owen vs Newcastle
Apps: 10. Goals: 13. Games scored in: 7.
Oh, how he's loved on Tyneside. Only twice did Owen fail to score against his future club while playing for Liverpool, while his other ‘failure’ was in a nine-minute cameo for Manchester United.
Owen terrified the Magpies from 1998-2001, thumping a St James’ Park hat-trick in 1998/99 and following that with two braces and another treble in his next three appearances against them. Fittingly, his equaliser against the Magpies in May 2004 came on his last appearance for Liverpool.
He'd later score 26 league goals in four years for Newcastle - only double the amount he’d scored against them.
Ruud van Nistelrooy vs Newcastle
Apps: 10. Goals: 11. Games scored in: 8.
Them again. When Owen scarpered for Real Madrid, someone else had to carry on the job of annoying Newcastle fans on a bi-seasonal basis.
Van Nistelrooy had been making a good fist of it two seasons before the Liverpool man’s exit, striking in each game of his debut 2001/02 season, a hat-trick in the next and then two more in the following matches. He scored twice in the FA Cup in 2004/05 (after doing so in the league), and then notched another in his final season at Old Trafford.
Thierry Henry vs everyone
Henry netted 12 times against Aston Villa, Middlesbrough and Charlton in his first spell with the Gunners, and added Leeds to the pile with that dramatic FA Cup third-round effort on his comeback in 2011/12.
Middlesbrough fans have actually been on the receiving end in the most games (nine), but the others aren’t too far behind on eight. Charlton fans were subjected to braces on his first three appearances against them from 2000-02, and another goal on his fourth. Swansea are the only English side not to have been stung at some point, but that was in a 27-minute substitute’s display the second time around.
Across the pond in MLS, Montreal Impact were stung badly by Henry. In the Frenchman's five appearances against them he scored nine times, including two braces and a hat-trick in his first outing.
Luis Suarez vs Norwich
Apps: 6. Goals: 12. Games scored in: 5.
The Uruguayan’s strong record against the Canaries is common knowledge, but utterly ridiculous nonetheless. Liverpool have stuck at least three goals past Norwich in seven of their last eight league meetings (three without Suarez), partly thanks to the Uruguayan's stunning four-goal salvo at Anfield in 2013/14. He netted again in the return game at Carrow Road, having helped himself to hat-tricks in the two preceding seasons.
There’s been similar dominance from Dennis Bergkamp, whose eight goals in three games against a hapless RKC Waalwijk included four- and three-goal hauls. Dean Holdsworth, meanwhile, tormented Oldham with seven strikes in four appearances during his Wimbledon days.
Eric Cantona vs Manchester City
Apps: 8. Goals: 8. Games scored in: 6.
The King done good against his side’s city rivals, scoring in six of his seven matches for Manchester United. He was only ever on the losing side against them once – for Leeds – and clearly didn’t like what he’d seen. In March ’93 he netted his first, enjoyed braces in both 1993/94 clashes, and then added another three in as many matches – including in the Reds’ 1996 FA Cup fifth-round triumph.
Rickie Lambert vs Millwall
Apps: 9. Goals: 10. Games scored in: 7.
Southampton reaching the top flight in 2011/12 was good news for Millwall fans: they'd no longer have to endure Lambert’s ominous presence. In the Saints' promotion season, the two sides faced off four times, with Lambert netting in three of them – including a Championship treble at The Den.
It was a continuation of the striker’s menacing form in League One, where he struck five times in as many games against the Lions, four of them with Bristol Rovers.
Les Ferdinand vs Tottenham, Everton
Apps: 12. Goals: 10. Games scored in: 7.
Sir Les had a handy knack of scoring against his former north London employers. He’d already netted against them six times for QPR (3) and Newcastle (3) by the time he’d joined in 1997, but then did it again with West Ham in 2002/03 and Leicester in 2003/04, the latter in a televised 4-4 thriller.
Apps: 21. Goals: 16. Games scored in: 13.
The former England man played against Everton more than anyone else, and scored against them accordingly. In his first 20-goal season (1992/93) he bagged a hat-trick at Goodison Park, before regularly notching against the Toffees for the R's, Newcastle, Tottenham and again with Leicester.
Emmanuel Adebayor vs Tottenham
Apps: 15, Goals: 10, Games scored in: 8
Arsenal fans couldn't fault the moody striker's return against his future club. The Togolese hitman endeared himself to the Gooner faithful on numerous occasions with his brilliant derby-day exploits for Arsene Wenger's men, netting in seven of the nine north London showdowns he played in.
Arsenal only lost one of them – the 5-1 League Cup thumping of 2007/08. He failed to score against the Lilywhites for Manchester City, but netted a Champions League brace against them during his loan spell with Real Madrid in 2010/11. Thankfully for Spurs fans, he didn't strike on his only Crystal Palace appearance against his old side.
Javier Hernandez vs Chelsea
Apps: 15. Goals: 9. Games scored in: 9.
Nine goals in separate games against a rival isn’t bad going, especially when you consider that over half of them came off the bench. The Mexican’s super-sub displays earned Manchester United a point and victory in the 2011/12 and 2012/13 campaigns respectively, although his goal off the bench in January 2014 amounted to nothing in his side’s 3-1 defeat at Stamford Bridge.
He got another for West Ham in a 20-minute cameo which earned the Hammers a 1-1 draw in 2017/18.
Fernando Torres vs Chelsea, Barcelona
Apps: 8. Goals: 7. Games scored in: 5.
Before he rocked up at Stamford Bridge and stopped scoring, the Spaniard couldn’t wait to stick the boot into Chelsea during his Liverpool days. Torres netted against the Blues at Anfield in his debut season of 2007/08, before sending the Champions League semi-final to extra-time with an equaliser at Stamford Bridge. He grabbed a pair the following campaign, added another in November 2010, and then swapped clubs for £50m in January.
Apps: 22. Goals: 11. Games scored in: 7.
Torres has scored more goals against Barça than any other side. Not only did he net Chelsea’s glorious semi-final decider in their victorious Champions League campaign, a younger Torres’s La Liga record with Atletico Madrid wasn’t half bad either. He grabbed his first in 2002/03, and then five goals in four games between 2004 and 2006 when his plucky side saw off the cup-toting Catalans three times in a row. The goals slowed with age, though – Nando only netted in two of his last 10 meetings.
Robert Pires vs Tottenham
Apps: 12. Goals: 8. Games scored in: 7.
Arsenal’s wing wizard epitomised his team’s dominance over their north London rivals in the mid-noughties. He converted in seven of his first eight appearances against Spurs, including in the Gunners’ 2-2 draw at White Hart Lane which confirmed the title in April 2004.
Ryan Taylor vs Newcastle
Apps: 6. Goals: 4. Games scored in: 4.
He might have spent six-and-a-half years there as a player, but before heading to St James’ Park in early 2009, Taylor was a menace against his club-to-be. The defender only scored six times in four years at Wigan, but four of them came against the Magpies in his most recent appearances; the first in 2006/07, another the following season and then two in each match of the 2008/09 campaign.
Three of them came via his trademark free-kicks, and the other a well-taken effort from range. If you can’t beat ‘em, sign ‘em.
Seydou Doumbia vs FC Aarau
Apps: 8. Goals: 12. Games scored in: 7.
The occasional goal-getter enjoyed a blistering two-season spell in Switzerland with Young Boys from 2008-10 – and it’s not difficult to understand why on this evidence.
Poor Aarau didn’t fancy it against him. Swiss teams play each other four times every campaign, and Doumbia netted in three of them in his first season. He followed that up by demolishing them in all four the following term, kicking off with a double before plundering his first hat-trick for the club. There was a brace in the third, before he wound down with a single in his final outing. He finished the season nine goals ahead of any other player, on 30.
Radamel Falcao vs Villarreal
Apps: 4. Goals: 8. Games scored in: 4.
A 200% strike rate, you say? Not bad. For Villarreal it was very, very bad, though, with El Tigre having struck on each occasion he’s played them. First he smashed four in the 2010/11 Europa League semi-final first leg in Porto, before adding another in the return fixture.
When he moved to Atletico Madrid they cowered with fear once again: Falcao scored twice in Madrid and then again at El Madrigal.
Sergio Aguero vs Newcastle, Chelsea
Apps: 14. Goals: 15. Games scored in: 9.
Newcastle fans still shudder at the thought of his five-goal spree in 2015/16 – and he only played for 66 minutes. He was on the pitch for less than 20 minutes in two of the five appearances he hasn't scored against the Magpies, but then again he doesn't often need long: back in 2014/15 he replaced Edin Dzeko as an 83rd-minute sub and still managed to round off a 2-0 win.
He got a hat-trick against them in 2017/18 and then one more the following campaign.
Apps: 19, Goals: 15. Games scored in: 9.
Aguero has also been a thorn in Chelsea's side down the years. He's scored in over half of the matches he's played against them, kicking off with a Champions League double for Atletico Madrid in 2009/10. At Manchester City he's scored two hat-tricks and a pair of braces against the Blues.
Honourable mentions
...because these chaps deserve some love too.
- Alan Shearer vs Leeds (Apps: 19, Goals: 20, GSI: 11)
- Wayne Rooney vs Portsmouth (Apps: 15, Goals: 12, GSI: 8)
- Darren Bent vs Bolton (Apps: 13, Goals: 11, GSI: 7) and Arsenal (Apps: 13, Goals: 8, GSI: 6)
- Nicolas Anelka vs Blackburn (Apps: 16, Goals: 12, GSI: 11)
- Billy Sharp vs Blackpool (Apps: 16, Goals: 10, GSI: 8)
- Matt Le Tissier vs Nottingham Forest (Apps: 9, Goals: 8, GSI: 6)
- Alex Revell vs Swindon (Apps: 10, Goals: 8, GSI: 7)
- Efan Ekoku vs Everton (Apps: 8, Goals: 8, GSI: 5)
- Simon Cox vs Leicester (Apps: 8, Goals: 7, GSI: 6)
- Shola Ameobi vs Sunderland (Apps: 16, Goals: 7, GSI: 5)
- Martin Paterson vs Sheffield Wednesday (Apps: 8, Goals: 5, GSI: 4); at Hillsborough with four different teams
- Jack Lester vs Rochdale (Apps: 6, Goals: 6, GSI: 4)
Have we missed someone who always bags against your boys? Tell us @FourFourTwo with hashtag #bogeymen
