Football's 25 worst waxworks: featuring Ronny, Rooney, Ozil and more
Cristiano's new bust? Pah. Everybody knows there's nothing in the world more terrifying than a human face sculpted in malleable plastic
There have been waxworks of some of the Premier League's biggest stars. And Rafael van der Vaart.
After all, what better tribute than having your likeness gawped at by tourists? And when said face is a half-arsed representation, we can at least have a good old laugh.
It's not just an English phenomenon, though: they're at it all over Europe – from Spain to Germany and back to Spain again. And if you thought waxworks of footballers would be a modern happening, think again. They go back at least as far as the 1920s...
25. Mark Hughes
The wax really brings out his eyes.
24. Steven Gerrard
(The waxwork is the one on the right.)
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23. The Beckhams
Posh and Becks this time, as Mary and Joseph. It's not offensive because he scored that goal that time.
22. Gianfranco Zola
Some (presumably) rather small children frolic around a wax Gigi.
21. Alan Shearer
Here comes that charisma joke...
Next page: Keegan... not loving it
20. Kevin Keegan
King Kev looks miffed with his waxy doppelganger – and rightly so.
19. Gary Lineker
Linksy meets minor Breaking Bad character, Ted Beneke.
18. Paul Gascoigne
Gazza in his early-90s pomp.
17. Geoff Hurst
Scored a hat-trick in some match or other.
16. Peter Shilton
Shilts, here, looking like something from an old episode of Doctor Who.
Next page: Rooney's feline familiarity
15. Wayne Rooney
Half-man, half-cat, all wax – it's Rooney, apparently.
14. Sven-Goran Eriksson
Sven lurks in the darkness.
13. David Beckham & Michael Owen
Becks and Little Mo in their late-'90s boyband stage.
12. Various
Spot the real 'legend': David Seaman, Ian Rush, Ian Wright, Geoff Hurst and Ruud Gullit.
Next page: Thumbs up for Zizou!
11. George Best, Nobby Stiles
The fickle nature of waxy fame. Best and Stiles both got the chop from Madame Tussauds in the '70s.
10. Zinedine Zidane
Zizou throws his trademark 'thumbs up'. Wait, hang on...
9. Andres Iniesta, David Villa
Spain stars Iniesta and Villa pose awkwardly with their prosthetic pals.
8. Mesut Ozil
The only thing stopping Ozil kissing the Madrid badge was his waxiness. Probably why he left...
7. Rafael van der Vaart
These models of Sylvie and Rafael van der Vaart now, sadly, stand in separate rooms.
Next page: Background noise
6. Cristiano Ronaldo
Cristiano stikes a pose.... y'know, for a change.
5. Dixie Dean
We can't even begin to explain what's going on in the background.
4. Stanley Matthews, Pele
Sir Stan watches as Pele catches sight of his house burning down.
3. Bobby Moore
Who could forget the famous image of Moore lifting the World Cup? Oh, right...
2. David Beckham, Jose Mourinho
Dreamboats Beckham and Mourinho face-off, cause each other to melt, etc.
1. George Best
Fortunately, Bestie's now back in one piece at The National Wax Museum in Dublin.
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