Giggs widens job search to include Aston Villa, data entry positions

After missing out on the Swansea City job, Ryan Giggs has told advisors that he is willing to consider Aston Villa or another Championship role, or maybe something in an office.

Since leaving Manchester United, Giggs has been passed over for a number of managerial positions, including Nottingham Forest, Swansea and Tesco Express Wilmslow, leaving him to consider widening his search.

“My [Job Centre Plus] advisor has been telling me for some time to be less specific in terms of the job I’m looking for,” Giggs told FourFourTwo. “In fact he has implied that ‘Premier League manager’ isn’t very realistic for someone with my CV, really.

“So we’ve started ticking a few other categories on the job search form, such as ‘Championship Manager’, ‘Assistant Manager’, ‘Pundit’ and ‘General Office Admin’.

“I even had an interview for a pretty decent data entry position, but apparently that one went to Steve McClaren. It did say that Dutch language fluency would be a plus on the advert, to be fair.”

Schadenfreude

Staff at Giggs’s local Job Centre Plus have become somewhat frustrated that the 42-year-old’s visits consist of speculation about people who may be losing their jobs rather than focusing on how he can hone his resumé.

“The ‘Skills’ section of his CV talks about ‘mazy, audacious solo runs’ and ‘incisive through-balls’ but really employers are more looking for things like ‘proficient in Microsoft Office’ and ‘meticulous eye for detail’,” Job Centre Plus supervisor Michael Hobbs told FourFourTwo.

“He’s got Manchester United Football Club as more or less his only employer, but his referee hasn’t worked there for years and the current boss there didn’t seem to know who he was.

“When I tried to broach that with him he said he didn’t like to talk about referees.

“Plus it clearly states that he played for England Schoolboys, yet a large part of his CV is ‘Welsh national football team’, which is exactly the kind of thing that makes employers suspicious.”

Please note: this story is not real. Obviously.

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