Gabriel Batistuta

At this point, you have to ask questions about the other 10 lads on the pitch – because these top international players all somehow went down

Nelson Vivas Argentina vs England at France 98, Di Canio’s infamous shove, Wenger’s revolution, the rise of Simeone... like a fighty, footballing Forrest Gump, the former right-back has been history’s witness

FourFourTwo It's one of the most evocative shirt numbers in football, and its wearers' currency is goals. From false nines to battering-ram forwards, every talisman tells a different story

Lists The Real Madrid talisman is on an incredible run right now, having plundered 21 goals in his last 11 games. Greg Lea rushes to the archives for similar goal sprees... 

Lists Poor Rio Ferdinand has been refused a professional boxing licence before even getting into the ring – but perhaps he’s just saved himself some angst, unlike many of this lot...