The Girl-Kissing Weekend Predictions - Round 12

Saturday

Real Madrid (4th) vs Recreativo (19th)


Even by Ramón CalderónâÂÂs magnificent standards, it has been quite a week for the increasingly potty Real Madrid president. The Bernabeu bigwig decided to face the clubâÂÂs âÂÂmini crisisâ in time-honoured tradition... by talking to every media outlet possible and making matters infinitely worse.

On Monday, Calderón shoved Pedja Mijatovic in front of the cameras to state, without the hint of a snigger, how he was right behind the teamâÂÂs German coach... until the Recreativo game, at least.

âÂÂIt was an absurd press conference with support for Schuster that nobody believed,â sniffed AS editor Alfredo Relaño.

Hours later, the club president - and now Dr Calderón, it seems - went on a radio station to declare that âÂÂnobody could predict (De la Red) would have a heart attack,â despite there being no reports published that this is what the midfielder suffered during the Copa del Rey match against Real Union.

âÂÂI donâÂÂt know the results of the tests,â admitted an apologetic Ramón on Wednesday. âÂÂIâÂÂm not a doctor, nor a specialist on the subject.âÂÂ

On Tuesday, the Bernabeu played host to a âÂÂclear the airâ meeting with the local press where Calderón was pictured either yawning or complaining about how the papers were not supportive enough - a trick from Joan LaportaâÂÂs play book last year.

The prickly, paranoid president then took the opportunity to show that he was not rattled at all by the reappearance of Florentino Perez and his famous photograph with Ronaldo and Zidane with a fine rant.

âÂÂTomorrow, I expect he will be posing with another player who took four million pesetas from the club and who has said himself was used for... prostitution,â declared the less than dignified Calderón.

âÂÂHeâÂÂs nervous, insecure and doesnâÂÂt have a clear conscious,â opined Josep Maria Casanovas in Sport in response.

To top off this fine week of work, Marca claimed on Thursday that Madrid were about to start negotiations with Milan manager, Carlo Ancelotti. If the paper is to believed - and thatâÂÂs a big 'if' - it puts PedjaâÂÂs declaration from Monday that âÂÂwe have never thought about sacking the manager, nor have we looked for a replacement,â into some doubt.

On a side note, they are playing a game of football on Saturday night.

LLL Prediction - Draw

Villarreal (2nd) vs Valladolid (13th)

Sensible VillarrealâÂÂs achievement of remaining the only unbeaten team in the Primera was all the more remarkable considering it was mostly achieved without the goalscoring stylings of the injured Nihat.

The Yellow Submarine will now have to carry on this massive mission without Joseba Llorente, as the forward is set to be out for the next month with muscle knack. But there is no need to fear says Manuel Pellegrini, Guille Franco is here to fill the teamâÂÂs striking shoes.

âÂÂNow is the moment for other players like Guille,â declared the Chilean manager before reflecting on what he had just said.

âÂÂBut I hope Llorente gets better as soon as possible,â continued Pellegrini with his vote of no confidence.

LLL Prediction - Home win

Sevilla (5th) vs Valencia (3rd)

No, your eyes are not deceiving you, there is an actual proper, grown-up, mortgage-owning, game of football being played this weekend.

After 11 rounds of dross - entertaining dross, mind - La Liga has a four-week burst of activity before returning to the lacklustre likes of Barcelona against Osasuna for the next five months.

Up until the winter break, most of the title chasers - and Real Madrid - will be going head-to-head and taking points off each other. ThatâÂÂs what Atlético Madrid are hoping anyway.

The manic mayhem starts on Saturday with Valencia visiting a sunny Sevilla on a bit of a high after two wins on the trot - victories that have brought out the best in the shy and retiring club president.

âÂÂWe are one of the best teams in the Spanish league and in Europe,â boasted José Maria del Nido. âÂÂWe are envied and admired.âÂÂ

If Del Nido is looking for Sevilla to reach the level of the likes of Liverpool, then his club is certainly on the right track. Marca reports this week that eight of the sideâÂÂs players have had their houses burgled over the past few months. Heady days indeed.

LLL Prediction - Away win

Sunday

Mallorca (15th) vs Málaga (11th)

After just one win in five, the Mallorca players took a long hard look at themselves in the mirror this week. But not in the way that Ever Banega probably does.

âÂÂWe need to fight for every ball,â grumbled defender Lionel Scaloni, âÂÂand not play at 80 percent.âÂÂ

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