Strictly, Sutton & chauffeuring Akinbiyi
OK, IâÂÂm REALLY bored now!
With no game to go to this weekend, and rapidly losing control over the oh-so important remote control at chez Onuora, these are dark times indeed.
With the glaring omission of Sky+ beginning to bite too, it's not overstating the case that right now IâÂÂm staring down the barrel of football Armageddon.
Hell, IâÂÂm even getting into Strictly Come Dancing, and can now distinguish between my pasa double and my waltz. I even critique the contestants before the judges now for goodness sake.
Meanwhile back in the real world, I see Lincoln have decided upon Chris Sutton and Ian Pearce as the new management team to replace Peter Jackson and that other rather nice fella whose name temporarily escapes me.
ItâÂÂs a bold appointment and they got off to a winning start which is encouraging, but tougher roads lay ahead.
What would make that road easier, would be some additional funds for the playing budget.
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ItâÂÂs usually the case that clubs tend to find 'new' money for a new manager, and usually not long after pleading poverty to the previous incumbent.
I confess to not having it on any authority other than rumour, that in this case it might actually have been a case of the opposite, with the manager dipping into his own pockets.
It all sounds a little incredulous to me. Chris Sutton, like any new manager, will soon find out that the job is a 24/7 stress-a-thon like no other.
And I donâÂÂt care if youâÂÂve got pockets as deep as Rockerfeller, the very least youâÂÂll want at the end of the month is Incomings as opposed to Outgoings.
I donâÂÂt know Chris other than from him as a player, and he was a fine one with a great career.
But he always struck me as someone who knew his own mind, and didnâÂÂt suffer fools gladly.
Those qualities arenâÂÂt bad ones to start off with, but heâÂÂll need man management skills too, plus the patience of Job to deal with and appreciate the more limited abilities of players at a level he wonâÂÂt be used to working with.
No such problems finance-wise for near-neighbours Notts County.
They inflicted the last defeat of the pre-Sutton era at Sincil Bank on last Tuesday, and recently recruited their latest big name signing, my old partner-in-crime Ade Akinbiyi.
Clearly not impressed by his goal-laden strikers so far, Sven and Ian McParland have bagged the ultimate gun for hire in Ade, a man guaranteed to strike the fear of God into any defender with self-preservation on his mind.
HeâÂÂs no spring chicken anymore, but despite an unhappy time in the Premier League with Leicester, below that level he has made his name as a one-man wrecking machine still fondly remembered at some of his old clubs such as Burnley, Stoke and, of course, Gillingham where we first met and became friends.
I spoke to him at the end of last week where he was tying up some loose ends in Houston, Texas where he has been plying his trade recently in the MLS.
He did say how much heâÂÂd enjoyed it out there and didnâÂÂt rule out a return to settle there one day, but clearly the challenge of perhaps one final promotion was too much to turn down.
No disrespect to either, but in contrast to his great mate Sol Campbell, AdeâÂÂs used to playing at clubs with more modest surroundings, and after the inevitable adjusting period heâÂÂll do just fine there.
Sol, if common sense prevails, should be back in the Premier League where he belongs in the not too distant future.
Whatever the scenario, IâÂÂve promised to go up and see Ade in Nottingham in the next couple of weeks.
You never know, he may need a driver familiar with the mean streets in that part of the world to show him the sights.
I do hope my own sights are set a little wider in the next few weeks before madness finally descends.
I feel like a contestant on Deal or No Deal, dreading the bloody Banker ringing!
IâÂÂm now screening my own bank managerâÂÂs calls in the hope that heâÂÂll get bored, and harass someone else.
How about that Chris Sutton fella. What ever came of him after that other striker Blackburn had at the time, Shearer, left for Newcastle.
HelâÂÂs got to be down to his last⦠er, oh hang on wait... best pick up the phone.
âÂÂHello, you rang? No, itâÂÂs not Noel here, and I think you know that.
"A job you ask? Well yes, IâÂÂm meeting up with a rich businessman just over from Houston actually...âÂÂ
Iffy
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